


The Folly Of Ambition

by YourFutureWillBeBeautiful



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Aged up Hwang Hyunjin, Aged up Seo Changbin, And he hates his job, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blackmail, Changbin is a CEO of a company and is RICH RICH, Changbin's Dad is kinda sexist and there is past homophobia implied, Completed, Fluff and Humor, Frustrating as all hell, Hwang Hyunjin is a Little Shit, Hwang Hyunjin-centric, Hyunjin is a Theater Studies teacher at a high school, Implied Sexual Content, Inner Dialogue, LOTS of flirting it's honestly overwhelming, M/M, Mentions of Past!MinBin, Self-Worth Issues, Strangers to Lovers, The slowest slow burn of all time, changjin - Freeform, chapter 15 pulling up at angst city, lots of insecurities between both of them, love that tag, minsung family is just happily sailing along here, oh yeah and Changbin has two kids, side minsung, they kind of hate each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:21:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 89,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27199772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YourFutureWillBeBeautiful/pseuds/YourFutureWillBeBeautiful
Summary: Relationships never really made much sense to Hyunjin. They were too stifling, too restrictive. He preferred his relationships to be casual and as free as possible; enjoying the thrill of the chase and men constantly pining after him.In before he met Seo Changbin. Soon-to-be CEO, dripping in designer everything and totally ripe for the picking. He was a soft touch, two kids, a good job, and Hyunjin thought he had him figured out in a heartbeat.Though, as it turned out, there was something a little different about him, and Hyunjin certainly didn't expect to wind up falling for him, too.*:･ﾟ✧
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Seo Changbin, Mentioned Han Jisung/Lee Minho, Past!MinBin - Relationship
Comments: 792
Kudos: 748





	1. I Was Seeking For A Fool When I Found You

**Author's Note:**

> This is a spin off of my Minsung story, [Number 16.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25619080/)  
> So the characterisations and references made here will make more sense if you've read that, first.
> 
> However, it can be read alone too, as long as you know:  
> 1.) Changbin and Minho were previously together and are divorced. They have 2 kids (Jeongin, Seungmin) that Changbin sees every other weekend.  
> 2.) Minho ended up with Jisung during Number 16 and Jisung also has a kid, Felix.  
> 3.) Jisung's bestest best friend is Hyunjin.
> 
> Please enjoy Hyunjin and Changbin being at each others throats!!! this is pretty much the epitome of the 'oooh you want to kiss me so bad' trope i'm not even kidding.

**PART ONE**

*:･ﾟ✧

“You’re not gonna try and give me your number, are you?” Hyunjin laughed, lugging his feet over the side of the bed, smoothing his hands through his hair then tensing his neck abruptly from side-to-side to feel the release of his collarbones. He peered across to the mirrored closet, his neck looked dirty, stained with purple and yellow splotches. 

“Wha—No, why would I do that?” Changbin replied, half yawning. He slipped his both hands under his head where it rested on the pillow, eyes still firmly closed.

Hyunjin looked back over his shoulder, raking his eyes across his broad, bare chest, the way it rose and fell irregularly, like he was just _acting like_ he was relaxed. His jerky movements totally gave him away. Hyunjin cocked a smirk, totally aware of the effect he had on him.

“Cause last night you said I was the ‘hottest guy you’d ever managed to score’. Honestly, I’m flattered.” He chuckled, rising to his feet, just a long white t-shirt of Changbin’s covering him mid-way up his thighs. If he stretched out now, he was sure he’d grab the older man’s attention.

“Oh please, I’d obviously been drinking. You should consider yourself lucky that I let even you stay here afterwards, that in itself, is a privilege.” Changbin retorted. 

Hyunjin sauntered over to the mirrored closet, stepping over last nights’ clothes to draw the door across. He examined it carefully from top to bottom. It was perfectly organised from the jackets, then the collared shirts, then to the long-sleeves and accessories hung up at the side. The whole space smelt expensive, like rich sandalwood, like _Bleu De Chanel_. 

He reached up to a small, mirrored storage box containing various perfumes and aftershaves, picking out the navy bottle and checking the label. He was right, it was _Chanel_. He turned back to Changbin, tantalisingly spritzing at the base of his neck before tapping it in with the pads of his fingers.

“That’s expensive, you know...” Changbin said, finally taking notice of his actions, sitting up so the comforter slipped down to his waist, exposing his stomach. He perched himself up against the headboard, watching him eagle-eyed.

“I’m very aware. But I’d rather not smell like sweat and regret when I get home.” He said, reaching for yesterdays jeans and stepping into them, yanking them up to his waist.

Changbin laughed, sliding his tongue across the top row of his teeth with a _smack_ , shaking his head at him.

“Regret, huh? You’re really something.”

“Well, anyway, I’m hungry. I should get something to eat.”

“Do you want me to call you a cab, or something? I don’t mind paying.” Changbin said, reaching for his phone beside him.

Hyunjin felt his blood start to simmer, a little heat building across the tip of his ears. “I don’t need your charity, thanks. If anything, I did _you_ a favor, last night.”

“I didn’t mean it like that, I thought it would just be a nice gesture…”

“Anyway, I’m flattered that you wanted to cuddle up to me last night, but just so you know Mr. Seo, I don’t do relationships or anything these days. They’re insanely overrated.” Hyunjin scoffed, adding a little _ttsh_ at the end of his sentence.

He ripped off the white t-shirt and threw it aside, fetching his faux _Burberry_ -patterned turtleneck from the floor and sliding it over his head. He struggled with the neck opening, before slipping it over his smooth shoulder skin with little resistance. He folded it slightly, ruching it at the bottom with his hands, not letting it fully meet the top of his jeans so that a little slither of naval just peeked through. He revelled in knowing that Changbin was intently watching him get dressed from the other side of the room.

“Well, me neither. You think someone like me would want a relationship with someone like you? You literally lied to me all night, acting all sweet. When, in reality, you’re actually—”

“—Someone like me, huh? I’ll have you know Mr. Seo, you won’t find anyone like me again. Trust me.”

“Well, that’s an understatement. And why would I trust you, I don’t even know you?”

“Actually, one could argue you actually know me very, _very_ well…” He teased, placing his knee on the bed, leaning across him to hover over the older man for a moment. He nipped his plump lower lip in between his teeth, staring directly down at him. “You shouldn’t trust me. I guess that’s the point.”

“You’re _really_ irritating, you know that?” Changbin laughed. He unconsciously licked at his top lip, moistening his mouth at the sight of the man in front of him.

“Yep. I know. Comes with the territory.” Hyunjin retorted. He knelt back up off the bed with a smirk on his face, smoothing out the creases in his outfit with the palms of his hands.

He wandered out of the door, leaving it wide open as he made his way through the house, looking around in awe. It was huge, and the floors were marbled and cold to the touch on his bare feet. He headed immediately into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator, and grabbing at some kind of chocolate pastry thing. He took a bite out of it, but it was way too sweet for it being so early in the morning.

Then, he grabbed at the milk carton and dangled it over his lips, pouring it in to his mouth without making contact with the soggy cardboard. As he drank it, he clocked the photo of Changbin’s kids mounted by fridge magnets, cocking an eyebrow. He remembered Seungmin, the kid with the great voice, but he couldn’t remember the other one’s name. The one that hung around with Felix, a lot.

He’d nearly forgotten that he’d managed to bag himself Minho’s ex. He’d joked about it before, but he never knew he’d actually _go ahead_ with it. It was embarrassingly easy too; all he had to do was give Changbin some puppy-dog eyes, pretend to listen to stories about his kids and rile him up a little; a teasingly-innocent thigh grab here, or a little-too-close-for-comfort whisper that would send a shiver down his neck.

Hyunjin wondered if he could have been the first person Changbin had tried to court since he and Minho broke up; it would certainly make sense as to why Changbin had clung to him all night after they went out drinking. Hyunjin didn’t particularly mind being a rebound, it was easier that way.

“And what exactly the hell do you think you’re doing? Are you out of your mind?” Changbin said, slipping through the door in just sweatpants, yanking the carton from his hand and placing it back into the side compartment.

“Only for you.” He replied, padding across the floor, looking into a few of the shiny cabinets. “Dang, it’s so nice in here. You weren’t kidding when you said you were rich.”

“Well. I did tell you I own shares in a Sound Engineering firm, I’m nearly the CEO of—"

“—Wow, the answer to a question that I never asked.” Hyunjin said, waltzing straight past him back out into the hallway. There was a large glass chandelier hanging above, and Hyunjin had to stop to marvel at it a little; he suddenly wanted to feel the crystal in between his fingers.

“If you’re gonna stand there and insult me in my own home—”

“What would you rather I be doing to you, Mr. Seo?” He teased again, turning back to him abruptly so that he collided with his bare chest. Changbin immediately pulled back, swatting his hands away in annoyance. He could feel Changbin’s frustration seeping out of his pores; the little microaggressions that Hyunjin could make out on his face were delicious.

“You’re going to go home barefoot?” Changbin asked, looking him up-and-down as he made his way down the hall.

“Of course not, I’m going to borrow your shoes because mine got ruined last night trying to find our way back here.” Hyunjin replied. He made his way across to a black, open, cloak room space to the side of the entrance, tons of shoes neatly placed in rows on the rack.

On one side there were some colorful, children’s-sized, sneakers and boots, and on the other side was the most luxurious collection of leather shoes he’d ever seen in his life. He hovered his finger over the row a few times, finally pointing to a pair and picking them up with his hooked index fingers.

“No, no, no. Absolutely not. Those are _Magnannis_ , there’s absolutely no way in hell. Do you even know how much those cost?!” Changbin said, grabbing at them. Hyunjin simply held them up higher, internally appreciating the feeling of having height on his side.

“Hmm. Well, _Magnannis_ …” He hummed, taking a step back from him and switching hands to hide both of the dress shoes behind his back in his left hand. He held his right hand out in front of him to defend himself just in case Changbin made a swipe for them again. “So, they’re a European, cognac, leather brogue with a round-toe, artesano sole… 600,000₩, give or take?”

“What th—”

“Just because my bank balance doesn’t reflect my own taste, doesn’t mean I don’t know fashion.”

“You are messed up in the head if you think I’m going to lend you those—" Changbin said, totally exasperated. It looked like Hyunjin had _nearly_ cracked him, he was starting to huff, and Hyunjin could tell he _this close_ to walking out of this room with a pair of shoes that cost more than his monthly rent.

“I’d say a night with me is worth one _measly_ pair of _Magnannis_ that you probably don’t really wear because they look at least a size too big for you, right?” He taunted, slowly removing his hand from across Changbin’s chest and raising his chin up with the side of his right index finger. “Come on. I was _so_ _good to you_ , so giving.”

And with that, Hyunjin slipped his feet in to Changbin’s 600,000₩ dress shoes, tucking his heel in with his finger, appreciating how good his ankles looked in the reflection of the glass door. The shoes were the perfect finish to this entire fit.

“Do you want a kiss goodbye, Seo Changbin?” He said, leaning in towards him teasingly.

“Absolutely not.”

Changbin pressed a button on a keypad mounted on the wall, and Hyunjin heard the little _clank_ of the latch on the front door followed by a buzzing sound.

“Oh good, because that would cost you those rather nice-looking _Tom Ford_ chain loafers, too…” Hyunjin said, pointing to them with his eyes. He slipped through the door into the porch area, watching Changbin intently through the glass as the door closed behind him. “Well, anyway, Seo Changbin, if you’d like to hook up again, you can just find me, I guess!” Hyunjin shouted, the thick glass muffling his voice.

“…And where would I find you?”

“Around!”

“Isn’t it easier if you just gave me your number?”

“You think a guy like me would give a guy like you my number?”

“You literally just said you wanted to hook up with me again?!”

“No, no, that was all in your imagination. Try to stop thinking about me, okay?” Hyunjin shouted mockingly, cocking his head to the side with the biggest grin on his face. He blew hot air against the glass, the chill of the temperature outside instantly misting it up. Then he drew a large heart with his index finger, and quickly sprawled his number inside of it before sauntering off down the path.

It was a test. One would presume that the numbers would fade away too quickly, plus they’d be back-to-front, surely no sane person could even read that number. But if Hyunjin knew guys like Changbin, he would assume that the older man would manage to extract it in some way before it faded away into nothingness.

He was so clearly into him; he didn’t even have to try.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a really short intro to the story, most of the other chapters will be quite long and i'll try and update twice a week if I can, if not it will be every week at least! <3


	2. To Smooth That Rough Touch With A Tender Kiss

*:･ﾟ✧

“Mr. Hwang, can I borrow a moment of your time before your class?”

Hyunjin pulled his head up from his laptop to see the Principal standing in front of him, donning an awfully gawdy, grey, faux-tweed number and a seafoam green _pocket square_ , it was nauseating to look at. He closed his Chromebook lid and immediately rose to his feet, patting himself down a little before bowing.

“Of course, Sir! What can I help you with? I’m sure I submitted all lesson plans and gradings on time? I mean, if I didn’t, I can certainly get them in to you by—”

“You know the yearly show? The performance?”

“Um, of course, Sir. It’s a tradition.”

“Well this year, we’re teaming up with the elementary school for some liberal arts program. It’s supposed to encourage kids to come here as their next educational step. You know how well equipped our arts department is, so they’ve offered it to us, first.”

“That’s great news, Sir.”

“Anyway, long story short, we’ll be in for a _sizeable_ pay out if we opt in and all we’d need to do is carry out some one-to-one workshops with some of the middle school kids and have them perform in the yearly show.”

“That sounds excellent, but with all due respect Sir, do you really want middle school children to perform in the school show, with the high school kids? The yearly performance is quite a big deal to the students, and they take it really seriously when it comes to auditions. We were even talking in department about outsourcing to an actual theatre this year?”

“Well, they won’t be _performing, performing_ Mr. Hwang, just chorus parts, sweeten up the parents, you know the drill.”

“Well, I guess—” Hyunjin sauntered off. He considered it was hard enough getting the high school children’s performances to a high enough standard, let alone babying middle schoolers all throughout the preparation. 

“I want you to take the lead on the project this year, can you do that?”

“M-Me?! Why?” He flung his head up so fast, words suddenly dying in his throat.

“Well, as you know, the head of Department stepped down, and Mrs. Jung is on maternity. You’re the only person I could see filling her shoes. Are you up for it?” The man said, nonchalantly picking up one of his little, potted cacti from his desk and rolling it around in his fingers.

“Wow… Certainly, Sir. I’m sure I could manage that if you gave me the opportunity.” He bowed again, before pulling back up and tucking his hair behind his ears.

“You’ve been getting great comments around here, Hwang, students and teachers alike. If you keep it up, you’d be a shoo-in for Head of the Arts Department.”

“Wow, that’s—Thank you, Sir. I’ll do whatever I can to make sure it’s a success.”

“Your _written_ submissions, on the other hand. Work on it.” He turned heel, taking the cacti with him. Hyunjin thought best not to question it if he wanted to get paid this month. The man looked around his classroom with furrowed brows as he wandered, looking begrudgingly at some of the monochromatic art pieces and _Jiha Moon_ ceramics he had laced his classroom with.

“Got it, of course, Sir.” Hyunjin replied, bowing deeply at him, not that it made any difference, as the man wasn’t even looking at him, anyway.

“By the way, it’s _A Midsummer Night's Dream_. It’s Shakespeare, do you know it?” The man pulled a centimetre-thick wodge of paper out from behind his back, with the English title emblazoned across the front. He took a few steps back towards him and handed it over, Hyunjin scanning it up and down in his hands.

“Of course, sir. I wouldn’t be a Drama teacher if I didn’t know Shakes—”

“We figured it could be easy to get the younger children to play the fairies and creatures, you know?”

“Great idea, as ever, Sir.” He retorted.

“And Hwang?”

“Yes, Sir?”

“That… Bright yellow turtleneck, it’s a bit _much_ for school grounds.” The man dropped his little silver, rectangular eyeglasses down his nose, scanning his outfit. It made him self-conscious for all the wrong reasons. “And the hair, you’ve had dye in it, right?”

“Oh, um, well it’s not permanent, I thought it would have faded—.”

“It’s gone by tomorrow. And _a shirt_ , next time I see you, please. Maybe you’ll do me the _honor_ of showing up to work wearing a tie, once in your life, too. This is a school, not a fashion parade.” He said, cocking his eyebrow.

“Yes, I- I apologise. Thank you, Sir.” He stammered, rubbing the sweat from his hands on to the front of his pants.

The Principal gave him a slight nod, before walking back across to the door and wandering through it, the little _click_ of the door cutting the tension. Hyunjin slunk back into his chair, feeling the creak of the cheap plastic as he lowered himself down on to the shoddy fabric, exhaling.

He didn’t _particularly_ want to inform his superior that the reason he had been wearing turtlenecks to work for the last two days was because he got _royally_ fucked up at a bar last weekend and the man he ended up in bed with seemed to want to suck the soul from his body via his collarbones.

Speaking of.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and swiped across the billion-and-thirty-two unread notifications that he’d been actively ignoring. He was waiting for something, or someone, in particular.

Weirdly, it was Tuesday, and he hadn’t heard anything from Changbin since Saturday. It was unusual for men not to immediately message him and tell them about _how much they had to offer him as a romantic partner_ , but he figured he was likely playing ‘hard to get’. Hyunjin laughed at the concept, he was so transparent.

He slipped his phone back into his pocket just as some of his next class of tenth graders started filtering in, making a general noise.

“Good Afternoon, Mr. Hwang.” A few of the girls sang out, making their way over to their desks, giggling and whispering to each other, like they always did. He’d managed to build a bit of a fan club in the three years he’d worked at this school. He looked at the script on his desk; he wasn’t sure if he was relieved to hear that he’d been doing well, or if he wanted to rip his own eyes out at the idea of having to spend even more time with the drama students.

He knew he shouldn’t complain; he was probably the biggest nightmare ‘theatre kid’ at his school when he was their age too. He even distinctively remembers using prop handcuffs to chain the leading man of his high school’s rendition of _A Streetcar Named Desire_ to the roof, so that he’d have to step up as the understudy of Stanley.

He outperformed everyone, that day.

*:･ﾟ✧

**The boys!**

Me, .Chris.  🐺,  🐿️Sungie!,  😻Minhooo

please please please

can one of you come out tonight

it’s a friday night

i swear i’m going insane with all this staying behind and tutoring

i’m losing my mind and I need to grind n unwind

🐿️Sungie:

Jin, I can’t call the babysitter on such short notice, man :( maybe next time?

soooo fob felix off to Minho and we can go out?

😻Minhooo:

I’m in this chat now, you know...? 🙃

Okkkk well

minho, fob the boys off to Jisung and /we/ can go out?

😻Minhooo:

Honestly Hyunjin it’s not that easy to just find childcare for three kids without any warning

wow add that to ‘reasons I don’t want to ever have kids’

you’re all stifling me, it’s heinous 🤢

@ **.Chris.** 🐺??? please

 **.Chris. ** 🐺: 

I mean, I probably could actually? x

I can’t stay out too late, though.

Have a studio session midday tomorrow. x

YES i knew you were my favorite

 **.Chris. ** 🐺: 

Please can we go to a regular bar though?

Your places are so questionable… x

no idea what you’re talking about 🤷

perfect come to mine at 9 tonight ok?

great, settled

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin and Chan slipped through the entrance of the bar, illuminated by the baby pink, neon sign that encompassed the space above the door. The vibrations of the bass sending ripples through their legs every time a beat hit. They sauntered through the artificially smoked-out dance floor to the back bar and seating lounge area, not too many people drunk enough to actually let loose, just yet.

The bar consisted of little metal blocks as tables, large enough for around four people each set, surrounded by faux leather, white space-style chairs that seemed to fit the eighties space-retro theme they’d set for the night. The bar behind was a black marbled-top mounted against chrome, with a mirrored wall behind it that was always dripping with condensation.

It was a nice place, Hyunjin couldn’t handle going to anywhere _too_ cheap and seedy, it didn’t fit his aesthetic. His particularly expensive tastes probably accounted for the 4500000₩ debt he’d racked up on his credit card.

There was a well-known, glamorous VIP room off to the left-hand side of the bar, that Hyunjin always managed to work his way in to, even though he never actually could afford the VIP prices. He always ended up finding someone who he’d be able to score drinks from anyway, most nights. If not, Chan would always cough up, he was a good friend like that, and he’d always been fairly well-off.

Luckily, he’d fooled around with the young, mid-twenties guy with the long, black hair that sold the VIP tickets, on numerous occasions. Enough times to be able to threaten to tell his beautifully naive Wife about their dubious encounters if necessary. Blackmail wasn’t his favorite coercion method of choice; he did have _some kind_ of moral compass, be it questionable, but he couldn’t say he’d lose sleep over it... 

He’d pulled his blonde hair back in to a loose bun and accentuated his eyes with some bronzed shadow, just towards the outer corners. Donning an oversized black blazer, with a deep, V-neck white silk shirt underneath, which was just a little overdressed, but just a little underdressed. It was perfect, and it was exactly the look that the young, mid-twenties guy with the long, black hair guy at the door, liked to see him in.

He pushed his way in to the small line of around five or six people, Chan wincing slightly as he did, awkwardly bowing in apology. He clocked eyes with the sheepish male, who he saw _visibly gulp_ as he immediately stood aside to let them both in past the fabric barrier. Hyunjin stared him down as he walked in, squeezing on his hand as he slipped past and leaving him with a shameless little wink.

The VIP area had a different vibe, it felt slightly less seedy and definitely more luxurious, with servers bringing champagne across to the tables and the entire place looking totally immaculate and polished. The neon theme carried through, but the lighting was so much more intense that you could barely make out the features of the people around you. It felt like the entire room was full of influencers and semi-famous people that he somewhat recognised.

In short, everyone in here was rich, which was why it was Hyunjin’s go-to in this city.

They headed to the bar, and Hyunjin had already locked eyes with a bleach-blonde, well-built guy that he actually _recognised_ from _Instagram_ , immediately glowering at him through half-closed lids, with a grin across his face. As he came closer, he wasn’t all that special to look at, but at least he had money to buy the first round for him.

Or the first five rounds.

*:･ﾟ✧

It was already 10:45pm.

Hyunjin was lacking a particular _something_. Usually, by this point, the numerous vodka shots and fruity mixers he’d consumed would give him enough of a buzz to want to get up and dance, or find someone else to latch on to, but for some reason, he felt uninterested.

He and Chan did a few more shots at their little leather booth in the corner after he’d managed to shake off the clingy influencer, who was trying to take photos with him, telling him how much he looked ‘like a model that he knew’ and how much they should ‘get to know each other’. It was such a drag; it didn’t even seem worth the five minutes of minimal graft he’d put in.

The booth in which they were positioned in was just far away enough from everybody else that he could breathe a little. He yawned, and his body felt fatigued, and it wasn’t even late.

He didn’t really know what’d come over him, but the thrill of the chase just seemed non-existent these days. No one challenged him and it was exhausting to play the same effortless game, over and over.

“Anyone catching your eye?” Chan asked, tapping anyway at his phone as the music boomed behind them.

“Not really. Poor showings, tonight.” He necked his drink in one, throwing the shot of clear, liquid-pain down his throat, wincing a little at the burn before slamming it back down to the table.

“Here’s an idea, why don’t you just have fun, rather than scouting someone to take home every time we go to a club?” Chan chuckled.

“Scouting someone out, is fun!”

“For you, maybe!” Chan laughed, poking at his arm.

“Ah, you know I love you, Channie!” He whined, scooting over in the booth across the leather to put his arm around Chan’s shoulders, pushing his head against the side of the older mans and squeezing him. “You know you’re my favorite!”

As he shifted across to the other side of the booth, he could see the entire bar, and his eyes instinctively wandered across it. He saw someone who suddenly caught his eye from behind. He squinted through the poor lighting to try and work out if the person an arms’ throw away from him, was the person he’d been thinking about for the last week.

Soft, silky, dark hair that was shining purple due to the obnoxious lighting.

A broad, muscular back that Hyunjin wanted to run his fingers all over, encased in a loose, oversized black t-shirt.

One _Chanel_ earring hanging from his left lobe and a small, black hoop in the other.

He watched as the man turned around from the group of other guys he was with, laughing and joking facing his direction, leaning his back against bar. It looked like he’d gone out for drinks with a few work colleagues, all different ages, some younger and some older. All the people around him seemed to amalgamate around him, like they were little planets revolving around the sun.

He looked charismatic, composed, primed and more importantly; Hyunjin could _smell_ the money on him from his booth. Suddenly, the older man looked up, across to Hyunjin, catching his eye for a split second before Hyunjin immediately looked away.

He felt his heart start to race, but he didn’t know why.

Hyunjin abruptly grabbed Chan’s hands, pulling him around to face him head on, staring at him dead in the eyes.

“Chan, look at me in my eyes, like they’re the best eyes you’ve ever seen, and smile a little.”

“What? Why?”

“Just! Do it!” He whined, smiling afterwards, all teeth on show. He relaxed his body towards Chan’s and started caressing the top of Chan’s wrist, twisting his finger in a little wave across his skin.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Just face me, look me in the eyes and laugh with me like I’ve just said the funniest thing ever.” He giggled, slapping the table at the hilarious joke that he’d _definitely_ just told, placing his hand on Chan’s outer thigh, shortly after.

“Hyunjin?” A low voice said over the sound of the bass from the other room. The man walked across the bar, a pint of something foul-looking in his hand.

“Oh, erm? Hey, _you?_ ” He replied, turning towards him, and cocking his head to the side in feigned confusion.

The older man standing in front of him scoffed, shaking his head a little before placing his beer down at their table and slipping his hands casually in to his front pockets.

“ _You_ …? We literally met last weekend…? It’s Seo Chang—”

“Oh! Totally, right, we met last weekend! Of course, we did!” Hyunjin replied frantically, cutting him off.

“You stole my shoes, remember? Or is that something you do with all the guys you meet?”

“Don’t listen to him Channie, he’s just being ridiculous. I’m totally not like that.” Hyunjin said, crossing his left leg across his right, leaning into Chan even further and sliding his arm around him.

Chan looked at him, he was intelligent, he’d clocked what the heck was going on here. Luckily, he and Chan were such good friends he didn’t mind playing along and embellishing Hyunjin’s wild stories a little. It was good payback for whenever Hyunjin had to flirt with one of the clingy friends of the girls Chan was trying to hit on.

*:･ﾟ✧

It was nearing midnight, and Hyunjin felt so far out of his element and he couldn’t really put his finger on _why_. He slunk down in his bar stool, only a few others around him and leaving one or two stools in between them. Chan had slipped away to dance with someone, so he allowed himself to have a moment alone, doing what he did best.

Getting absolutely slaughtered on shots of God knows what and regretting it the next day.

Changbin suddenly appeared behind him, slipping his legs over the bar stool right next to him, and signalling the bartender with a wave of his hand. He leant towards him with his right shoulder, before rolling back around in the stool to watch Chan hit on some random girl on the dance floor. He propped himself back on his elbows against the bar, smiling cockily in a way that Hyunjin couldn’t stand. 

“Looks like your catch got away. Not rich or good looking enough, for you?” He teased, flitting his eyes over to where Hyunjin was sitting.

“Excuse me, I just got bored of him… Looks aren’t everything, you know.”

“Could’ve fooled me, that’s all you’ve got going for you.”

“You’re an asshole.”

“And you’re not?”

“You’ve got a point.” Hyunjin said, peering down to his new _Magnanni_ dress shoes under the bar, hoping that Changbin hadn’t noticed he was still wearing them. 

The bartender slipped Changbin two glasses of something on ice, some dark brown-colored, maybe-whiskey that made Hyunjin shudder as the older man drew it to his lips. He took a small sip to fill the awkward tension, before shotting the rest in one gulp.

“By the way, earlier… You pretending not to remember my name, that was cute. _Really_ cute.”

“Pfft, whatever. I couldn’t remember if you were last week, or the week before.” He said, taking a sip of his own drink.

“Weird, that you wouldn’t remember a name you were screaming less than a week ago.”

Hyunjin suddenly coughed on his drink, spluttering his way-too-expensive beverage across his front, and lurching forward towards the bar with his hand covering his mouth. Luckily, the spirit he was drinking was clear, otherwise his shirt would have been totally ruined.

“Plus, you know I was with Minho for a long time. I’d be seriously surprised if Jisung hadn’t mentioned me at all considering everything that went down.” He said, with an insufferable smirk across his face.

He watched as Changbin immediately downed the second shot that the bartender had given him, looking back, his gaze so bemused at his expense that it pissed him off. He felt his pulse accelerating, thumping at his wrists, and his fingers started to curl up around his glass, before he abruptly slammed it back down on the bar.

“Oh yeah. You’re the one Minho _dumped_ after eight years for someone else better than you, right?” He spat back.

Changbin’s eyes blew open.

It was a cheap shot.

It was the cheapest of cheap shots.

Hyunjin could feel himself squandering, and it wasn’t a feeling he liked. He felt a pang of remorse for saying it immediately after, but he wasn’t about to give in to someone who was going to embarrass him and pick him apart for his own amusement.

To his surprise, Changbin tutted, then just faintly laughed, shaking his head.

The older man signalled the bar tender again, pulling out his black _Valentino_ wallet, pointing at himself and Hyunjin and signalling _‘2 more’_ with his fingers, of which the bartender nodded in understanding.

“So, we’re leaving here together tonight, right?” Changbin asked, totally straight-faced, but with a little dryness in the way he spoke.

“I- What?”

“You and me, we’re going back to my place after this, and I’m going to give you the night of your life.”

“Night of my life, _please_.” Hyunjin scoffed. “What makes you think I’d entertain that? If you haven’t already noticed, I don’t tend to go back for second helpings. I like to fill up on the main course.”

“You’ve been watching me all night, I’ve seen you. You’re not a slick as you think you are, you know.” Changbin stared at him so intently, his dark eyes even murkier in the terrible fluorescent lighting. 

“You’d only notice me watching you, if you were watching me too.” Hyunjin retorted, breaking the gaze.

“You’ve got a point. Hard not to watch you, you’re certainly attention grabbing.” He said, wetting the edge of his mouth with his tongue as he spoke.

The bartender suddenly brought over two more of what they’d both been drinking before, and Changbin slipped the man a 50000₩ bill, telling him to ‘ _keep the change’_. 

It was infuriating. Frustrating to the highest degree.

“Well. All things considered; I’d assumed you’d not wanted to hook up again.” Hyunjin said, trying to mask his annoyance as indifference.

“And why’s that?”

“You didn’t call? Usually guys call me up _begging_ and _grovelling_ for a second chance, sometimes they even offer to pay for my company, but you didn’t? Kinda weird if you ask me…” He casually sipped on his drink; Changbin had clearly doubled up on the spirit for him, so he winced at the scorch of the alcohol travelling down his throat.

“Well, firstly, you won’t see me grovelling for anyone. I have some self-worth. Secondly, you never actually gave me your number. And thirdly, I guess it just kind of slipped my mind; I have a lot going on right now.”

There was a silence between them; or as silent as it could be with disgustingly loud EDM blaring out from the dance room adjacent. Hyunjin couldn’t help giving him a once over, watching the way he condescendingly leaned across the bar. He felt stroppy, like he wanted to throw a tantrum and go home; this night hadn’t gone the way he’d planned at all, in fact he felt _worse_ than before.

He wasn’t sure if he was gratified that Changbin had wanted to spend the night with him again, or enraged at the idea that Changbin’s ‘other stuff he had going on’ was more important than contacting Hyunjin again in the first place.

To be honest, he wasn’t really sure why he cared at all, it wasn’t like he even knew this man.

“So, Hyunjin, considering the guy you ‘have your eye on’ is actually one of yours and Jisung’s’ very _straight_ friends, are you gonna let me take you home, or not?” He teased, placing his hand firmly on Hyunjin’s thigh.

“Wow, so forward. You were so much nicer to me last time you were trying to get me in to bed...” Hyunjin said, huffing, rolling his eyes up to the ceiling as he sapped up the last remnants of his drink.

“Well, last time you’d convinced me you were a down-on-your-luck, high school teacher with a heart of gold, who loved kids and was ‘ _just having a hard time right now’_ … Remember?” He scoffed.

“Well, one of those things is true.”

“I’m guessing it’s not the heart of gold?”

“I am a high school teacher.”

“And what do you teach?”

“Acting.”

“Makes sense…”

*:･ﾟ✧

By the time they’d stumbled out of the cab and were in the porch, the _oh-so-familiar_ porch that Hyunjin sprawled his number on, he was already ardently smashed up against the thick, frosted glass, next to the front door.

The sting of how cold it was against the back of his silk shirt ripping all the air from his lungs. The contact made him arch his back away and crank his head up with a _hiss_ , prompting Changbin to take that as his invitation to start sucking marks into his neck.

“Please don’t br-uise my neck too-too badly, my boss is already on my ass.” He stuttered clumsily, his head lulling across to the other side to somewhat push him away from his collarbones. Changbin’s hands moved from his waist, slowly higher over his sides up to his neck, firmly cradling the back of his nape, thumbs pressing into the tender pressure points just in front of his ears.

“No fair. That’s my territory.” He scoffed, low and husky.

He forced the younger man’s gaze back down to look at him, before pulling him closer. He kissed him hard on the lips instead this time, angling his face to find the perfect position to lap up the muted taste of the tequila on his lips.

They were kissing in cursive, over and over, in a slow, lazy rhythm. The way they were slotting together so purposefully, so sensually, it made him light-headed. Small gasps were escaping him; noises like he’d never heard himself make were getting caught in his throat every time Changbin’s lips moved against his own so tantalisingly slow.

He felt more intoxicated from one kiss than he’d felt all night, after multiple slammers.

Changbin finally let go of his neck and spread his fingers out, letting his hands smooth over the silk covering Hyunjin’s shoulders, slowly down his arms, wrists and to his hands. He suddenly felt the feeling of fingers invading his own, a slight fumble before Hyunjin realised he was trying to interlock their hands.

He opened his eyes during the kiss, watching how Changbin’s cheeks moved up and down as his tongue explored his mouth. His eyes were fluttered shut, he looked relaxed and unhurried, like he was content to just kiss like this.

Hyunjin’s whole body was curling under, he wasn’t sure if it was the pressure of Changbin’s chest against him, the strange sense of restlessness that he’d been feeling the entire night, or if he’d just been _courteously_ leaning down to give the other man the upper hand due to his lack of height. Either way, it’d been going on _far too long_. He could feel himself slipping under, losing control to the man leaning over him.

He couldn’t take it.

Hyunjin pulled back away from his hands, and shoved him back with two flat palms, leaving the man breathless, his eyes blown out and glossy, pupils deliriously dilated to their full extent. He insistently wiped his thumb across the corner of his mouth, removing some of his saliva from his lip.

“Open the door, now.” Hyunjin demanded. Staring at him, almost resentfully. “You said you were going to give me the night of my life. Now, fucking prove it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PHEW wow congrats if you got through all that!!!!
> 
> Also, this story isn't gonna be as long as N16, so you can tell the pacing is a little bit different, a bit quicker. hopefully it's still coherent enough to follow along with and not feel too forced/rushed! i'm probably not going to update this as frequently as the main story either, but when i do the chapters are gonna be pretty hefty so... grab a snack!
> 
> also YES i'm back on my shakespeare bullshit can you IMAGINE those precious angels playing little fairies and woodland creatures hell yeah you can
> 
> thank you for reading <3


	3. I Am Not What I Am

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin shoved him through the doorway, Changbin stumbling to find his keys in his back pocket. He rustled around a moment, finding the fob before nearly dropping it at the sensation of Hyunjin attaching his lips to the side of his neck from behind.

As soon as the door was closed and the combination for the alarm system set, Hyunjin grabbed his bicep, spinning him around to drag him down the marbled hall, eliciting a few soft laughs from Changbin at how eager he was.

He remembered where the bedroom was, for some reason, and swung him through the half-open door into the room, before hitting the light switch to illuminate the immaculately organised black and chrome masterpiece that was his bedroom.

“I can put the lamp on, or some—”

“No, I want to _see_ you.” Hyunjin said, his eyes consumed with impatience. 

Hyunjin kissed him hard, walking him backwards, taking a little control back and using his height to his advantage as he peeled Changbin’s leather jacket off of his shoulders. Changbin scoffed into the kiss, pulling his phone from out of his back pocket and tossing it on the bedside table with a little _thump_ so he didn’t crush it beneath his and Hyunjin’s combined weight.

Hyunjin shoved the older man backwards until he was dropped down, sitting against the edge of the bed, his hands reached out flat behind him to brace himself. Hyunjin immediately wrapped his thighs around either side of him, messily straddling him in place.

Changbin cupped his face with his palm, wanting to bring him back in to another kiss, but Hyunjin batted his hand away, choosing to pin it down next to him for a moment, instead.

He’d had enough of kissing; it was too slow for him, too tedious.

“Wow, someone’s keen.” Changbin teased, raising his other hand from where it was positioned behind him to push back a few stray hairs framing Hyunjin’s face. Hyunjin rolled his eyes at the rather _affectionate_ gesture once again, blowing up at his bangs to move them himself and grabbing Changbin’s other hand to pin that one back, too, jolting him backwards.

He turned his face to look at the mirrored closet adjacent, watching how he towered over Changbin in the reflection. It felt invigorating to have someone so strong beneath him.

“No, I’m just bored of all this build up, I just _want you_ already.” Hyunjin growled in his ear, head tilted to the side, slyly smiling at him indirectly through the mirror. He reached down, tugging at the bottom of his shirt to hastily wrench it off from over his head, tossing it aside like it _didn’t cost more than his_ _car_. He scraped his nails down either side of Changbin’s biceps, eliciting a groan from the older man.

“Holy shit, _Hyunjin_ … You’re-You’re unreal.” Changbin murmured cockily, cranking his head back up to suck at the taller man’s neck.

The sudden compliment lit a blaze inside of Hyunjin’s chest. He watched how the older man responded to him in the mirror, watching how he trailed his lips against his neck like his life depended on it.

He pushed him back with his palms again, until his back was firmly against the grey, fluffy comforter. He could see Changbin’s smug, little smile and he really wanted to kiss it off.

But he wouldn’t.

There wouldn’t be any more kissing like earlier, tonight, Hyunjin reminded himself.

He continued running his hands quickly down Changbin’s bare upper body to the top button of his pants, his skin was hot to the touch compared to how cold Hyunjin’s fingers felt. Changbin jerked at the sudden cool contact at his hipbone, but Hyunjin rather felt he deserved that after pushing him in to his ice-cold porch window, earlier. It was decent payback, for now.

He stared at his torso for a brief moment, his honey-stained skin, and the way his chest was rising and falling like an autumn rip tide. The time they’d slept together before, it was dark, with all the lights off, just fumbling around in the blackness and hoping for the best.

He’d seen Changbin’s body in its full glory the next morning when he was propped up in bed with a fluffy, bedhead and slightly sleep-swollen face. Having it under his fingertips felt somehow invigorating this time, now that he could focus on him more clearly.

His chest was muscular; in fact, all of him was muscular. Yet, the skin that encompassed his torso and stomach was so smooth and soft to the touch. He found himself surrounded by the cozy feeling of warm skin, the heat radiating off of his body.

The smell of balmy sandalwood was ravaging his nostrils, and he found himself moving back up, to hastily kiss Changbin’s neck at the spot where the smell was so rich and concentrated. It was like nectar to him.

Hyunjin made quick work of removing his belt, throwing it aside, then his pants and briefs, until the older man was totally bare and pinned down beneath him. Changbin lifted Hyunjin’s shirt off over his head too, the smooth, white silk sliding off of his own lithe frame easily, almost like Hyunjin wore loose-fitting clothes on purpose whenever he ventured ‘ _out, out’…_

As he pulled it off, Hyunjin dropped both hands at either side of Changbin’s head, gazing at him again, their faces inches apart, their slightly alcohol-soured breath overwhelming each other’s senses.

He looked at the soft lines of his face juxtaposed with the sharpness of his dark eyes narrowing; seeing how his expression changed as soon as Hyunjin was above him; like he was admiring something special, something _beautiful_. He could see how much he enticed the older man, how attracted to him he was, with the way that his pupils dilated so rapidly like he was high on just the sight of him.

A feeling was washing over him, a meddling yearning to pull him closer.

Hyunjin leaned in, and they were kissing again, slow, and as sensually as before, or maybe even more so than before. He wasn’t sure how it happened, some sudden rush of oxytocin making him act like some lovestruck teenager who’d never been kissed before.

Hyunjin couldn’t deny how extraordinary it felt, no matter how much his brain contended with his body, telling him that it was probably a _very bad idea._

Changbin started to unbuckle his belt, and peel his pants off from underneath him, his hands demanding Hyunjin to assist, to which he happily obliged, wriggling out of them as quickly as he could whilst still keeping their lips pressed together.

Whilst Hyunjin was in a certain state of dazed _malleability_ , the older man used his strength to pull him off from on top of him, so they were both laying on the bed on their sides facing each other, legs intertwined as they _just kissed_ relentlessly for what felt like an eternity. He had no idea how much time had actually passed whilst his mind was in this state.

He felt Changbin’s arms wrapping around him, removing the last remnants of his clothes, and drawing him in closely with his muscular arms, their bare bodies mingling for too long.

Far too long.

A _very, very bad idea,_ he reminded himself.

He opened his eyes again, just to prompt himself to think about what it was he was actually doing here.

Hyunjin abruptly parted the older man’s thighs with his knee, swinging himself back up and ambling over top of him again, pressing him down with his hands.

His mouth hungrily trailing down his chest, to his hips, lower and _lower still_ … Before the sound of a tinny, rock song started blaring out of Changbin’s phone from beside them. Changbin let it ring for a moment, totally dazed by the feeling of Hyunjin sucking marks into his thighs.

“Wait, that’s my sons’ ringtone.” Changbin suddenly exclaimed through broken breath, his eyes blowing open.

He gently shoved at the top of Hyunjin’s head with one hand, shifting his body backwards and lurching over to the side of the bed to grab the phone, instead. He looked at the screen, before swiping his thumb across the screen to unlock it.

“What?!” Hyunjin screamed in disbelief, sitting back on his knees, mouth agape.

“Wait a second, I’ll be two secs.” He said.

“Are you kidding me right now?!” He screamed, his face pink and flushed, much like the rest of him…

Changbin swung his legs across the side of the bed, and then bolted across to his mirrored closet, pulling out a black, silk bathrobe and throwing it over himself carelessly, before answering the phone at the other side of the room, his back facing him.

“Seung? What on Earth time do you call this?! It’s nearly one-thirty in the morning!” He said, firmly but with his voice slightly lowered.

The phone was just loud enough that Hyunjin could hear the muffled sound of the young boy talking back though what sounded like broken sobs.

_“I-I had a nightmare and I wanted to-to talk…”_

“Couldn’t you talk to your Dad, or Jisung? It’s really late, little man.” He retorted, raking his fingers through the back of his now slightly-matted hair.

_“I just, I don’t know, I was really scared, and I just wanted to talk to y-you. I’m sorry if I-I woke you, Dad.”_

“No... No, it’s okay, it’s okay.” Changbin cooed, turning back and exhaling, wandering back across to where Hyunjin was sitting, falling back to sit on the edge of the bed next to him. He leant backwards, reaching his arm out, to place a gentle ‘ _reassuring’_ hand just above Hyunjin’s knee cap.

“Tell me what happened in the nightmare.” Changbin said to his son, his voice much softer.

Hyunjin rolled his eyes and huffed, bounding off of the bed, ripping Changbin’s arm off of him. He knelt down, leaning over to aggressively snatch his clothes off of the floor.

“Where are you going?” Changbin mouthed at him, holding the phone to the side whilst covering the microphone. He looked taken aback, there was a little surprise in his eyes.

“Home?! What do you think?!” Hyunjin snapped loudly, shimmying back into his pants, and buttoning them at the front with a bit of a difficulty due to how shaky his hands were. Changbin suddenly recoiled at the loud, unexpected response, turning back to cover the microphone with his hand again. 

“No, no, no one’s speaking! No one’s here, Seung. It’s okay, it’s just me.” Changbin responded, to whatever Seungmin had said, clearly about hearing Hyunjin’s voice in the background of the call.

Hyunjin felt his heart racing; the veins in his forehead starting to thump, bringing on an acute headache.

The _audacity_ of this man to pretend he wasn’t even there.

The cloudiness from before was different now, it felt curdled and bitter, stifling him, and overwhelming his senses to the point where his vision was a little hazy in his anger. He found himself trying to shake off the thoughts. He had _no idea_ why he was irritated.

What else would Changbin say, exactly?

_‘Oh yes, Son, that’s just the sound of the man I drunkenly picked up from a bar and planned to fuck, this evening!’_

He couldn’t even rationalise why he was annoyed about it. None of this even mattered. Nothing mattered.

He swallowed down whatever he was going to say, instead opting to get the hell out of there, as fast as he could, not stopping to write his number on the fucking window, this time.

His eyes finally cleared through the purple fog as he felt the cool air of the outside world hit him like a freight train.

*:･ﾟ✧

_“Fetch me that flower; the herb I shew'd thee once:_

_The juice of it on sleeping eyelids laid,_

_Will make or man or woman madly dote,_

_Upon the next live creature that it sees.”_

Hyunjin lacklustrely skimmed through the script, writing out little ‘modernisations’ in the margins. It was far too early, 9:00am on a Saturday morning, and he was waiting patiently in the main hall for the children to arrive. He’d even not gone out Friday night, as he knew this was kind of a big deal to his Principal and he figured he probably shouldn’t show up to work with a hangover since turtleneck-gate.

He hadn’t been ‘ _out, out’_ in a few weeks, not since he last saw Changbin. Not since he last spectacularly bailed on him after getting himself admittedly way too worked up over something so trivial. 

It was probably a good thing; he didn’t particularly like the bizarre power that Changbin had over him. He’d dated much richer guys before, much stronger guys, much more stubborn guys, you name it. Something about him was a little different, and he tried not to dwell on it before he sent himself crazy. He couldn’t deny though, he _had_ been thinking about it, way more than he would like to admit.

It was _‘Day One!’_ of his three weekend drama workshops with the middle schoolers today. He was told that the kids that were coming in to take part in the minor roles in the play were the kids that excelled at music, or attained excellent grades in drama or art.

There were around ten of them wandering in through the school foyer, signing in at the reception, across from the main auditorium hall where he was carrying out the class. All the chairs were packed away so that it was just an empty, polished-wood, open space for them to work in. Hyunjin liked it like that, he much preferred teaching when it was practical and not so suffocating. 

Four little boys and six little girls from the middle school across the road, all dressed neatly in their little navy uniforms and yellow striped ties, bowed to him. He didn’t expect them to be in uniform. Admittedly, they were _kind of_ cute, but he was sure he’d feel differently once they started opening their mouths.

He welcomed them all, greeting their parents with gracious nods and scoring some looks of admiration from some of them. He remembered one of them, from when she’d tried to hit on him before, at the school talent show a few weeks ago.

He played up to her a bit, smiling at her and tucking his hair behind his ear. It was always a decent idea to get in the parents’ _‘good books’_ , especially considering he was on track for a promotion if he could pull these workshops off.

As the parents left their kids in his _very capable_ hands, Hyunjin projected his name up on the screen with a clicker. Next to it, a little itinerary for the two hours they would be spending there. A few warm-ups, some vocal exercises, some script reading and some movement practice in character.

He considered this would probably be the longest two hours of his life.

They started with a warmup, all holding hands and weaving in and out of each other’s laced arms whilst copying the movement the previous kid had made. The second warm up was a vocal one, starting with some pitch work, which he changed into animal noises to suit the age of the ‘students’ he was teaching. He was already exhausted by the noise by the second warm up.

One of the children, in particular, suddenly caught his eye when he heard his voice.

Sandy brown hair, neatly kept, with a little grey, woollen cardigan and a little cross-body satchel placed behind him on the floor. He had little round, metal-wired spectacles on, so he hadn’t recognised him immediately, but there was no doubt who it was.

He swallowed.

He was about to spend the next two hours, with Changbin and Minho’s son, the one with the good voice.

It wasn’t like Seungmin was particularly shy and stayed inconspicuous, either. He kept volunteering for reading different parts and getting so much more actively involved than most of the other kids. There was a certain confidence radiating off of him.

He had even spent his little ten-minute break after the first hour asking Hyunjin for advice on how he could better project his voice when he was on stage, even though he was clearly the loudest one there.

He stayed next to Hyunjin in the circle the entire lesson, one of those kids that clearly liked to suck up to the teacher. It felt different when he was teaching younger children. When it was teenagers, most of the class would ridicule the kid that sucked up to him, but it was different with the younger ones. They all admired Seungmin, and followed his lead, like he was some _tiny little CEO…_

The second hour they’d spent working on the way in which the original English text had been translated to Korean, and the modern approach they were going to take on stage. The old English would have likely confused most of the kids, apart from Seungmin, who for some reason, knew a part of the script _in English, entirely from memory._

He wondered if he’d inherited his strong-will from Minho, or his slither of arrogance and tendency to make a show of himself, from Changbin…

Hyunjin had spent most of the two hours somewhat appreciating his work ethic, how solid and assured he was. He almost reminded him of himself, at that age, before _boys_ massacred his grade point average when he hit high school…

*:･ﾟ✧

The parents finally filtered back in to collect their kids after the workshop. Each one of them thanking him for taking the class, one of the Mom’s complimenting him on his amazing shoes, which were _definitely his_. At the high school, he’d never interact with the parents, unless it was some kind of negative encounter or a PTA meeting. It was strangely warming to be thanked for his work, for once.

They left one-by-one; it was nearing half-past eleven.

There were two children left remaining after the session had finished, was one little girl with straight black bangs, in a blue and white gingham pinafore with her blazer over top and Seungmin, sitting on one of the chairs at the side, tapping away at his phone looking a bit exasperated.

The second-to-last Dad came in to pick up _‘Princess Yuna’_ who dived into his arms, giggling. He gave Hyunjin a firm handshake as he left, and Hyunjin definitely clocked him giving him the up-and-down… He wasn’t bad, but Hyunjin tended to only go after people who were at least a solid 7/10.

They were suddenly plunged in to silence as soon as the little girl left; it was just him and Seungmin.

Hyunjin began awkwardly pacing around the room, patting his thighs with his hands in a little rhythm. It felt a little uncomfortable, to say the least, not that Seungmin really had any idea who he was. His naïve, innocence was very much welcomed.

“Are you good at English, Mr. Hwang?” He suddenly asked, a little confused look on his face.

“I- I mean, actually, yeah, I am. I majored in English.”

“Do you know what this word says, the ‘C’ looks strange?” He asked.

Hyunjin walked across and crept down next to him, kneeling, looking across to read the word he was pointing at on his phone. He wasn’t playing a game or anything like Hyunjin had expected, he was actually reading some English text.

“It’s _‘façade’_. It actually comes from a French word. It means like something is fake, pretending to be something else.”

“Oh. Thank you! I’ve learnt a lot from you today.” He said, nodding his head. “I didn’t say earlier during the class, but you’re Felix’s uncle, right? I saw you at the talent show when your hair was pink. It was cool.”

“Uh, yes. I mean, I’m not his real uncle or anything, just I’ve known him since he was a baby because Jisung is a very good friend of mine. But when I’m here, I’m just Mr. Hwang, okay?” He said, smiling back.

“Oh! Of course! Mr. Hwang!” He apologised, bowing deeply as he sat. “I really liked the class today; it was really fun. Thank you for helping me with my voice projection.”

“It’s no problem, Seungmin. You were really, _very_ good.” Hyunjin replied.

It was definitely an understatement; it was clear to him and probably all the other kids in the class that Seungmin was leagues above the rest of them in terms of performance ability.

Hyunjin could relate.

“It’s because _you_ helped me.” The young boy beamed; his floury, little _pillow_ cheeks scrunched up to his eyes, obscuring his view.

It was nauseating how cute he was. His little round face and soft hair. The way he swung his little legs, dangling them over the chair. Little white socks pulled up to his shins with some little fashionable, white _Hugo Boss_ deck shoes with a little navy blue trim and laces. _Gross._

“When is Minho— I mean, your Dad, picking you up then? Is he running late?” Hyunjin asked, glancing at the large clock mounted above the auditorium stage.

“No, my other Dad is getting me today! We see him every other weekend. He’s late a lot because he has a big company and its busy all the time, but he can’t help it, I guess. I am sorry if I am keeping you late, Mr. Hwang.”

He wanted the ground to swallow him.

The world wasn’t this cruel, there was _no way_.

And just like that, suddenly _, there he was_ , appearing through the revolving door at the foyer across the way. Hyunjin stood up, taking a step back from where Seungmin was sitting, gawking at him.

Changbin.

He was wearing one of the most pristine oversized, black, blazers that Hyunjin had ever seen. The edging on the perfectly-tailored, surgeon cuffs told him that it was probably an Italian dry wool twill. Maybe _Balenciaga_.

He had a Bluetooth headphone in his ear, animatedly speaking to someone whilst in his other hand was a large, black, leather attaché briefcase.

He looked _frustratingly_ good, and Hyunjin had barely dressed up today, just wearing a pair of straight black pants and a burgundy-colored shirt with a flight ruffle at the sleeve. He cursed internally, though he couldn’t have ever imagined he would _actually_ run in to him again, let alone at work.

“Sorry I’m late Seung, Grandpa has been trying to—” Changbin started, suddenly looking up from his phone, clocking Hyunjin immediately. “H-Hyunjin!?” He blurted out in surprise, his eyes widening.

“It’s, _Mr. Hwang_ , actually.” He corrected him, smiling at him through gritted teeth, irritation seeping through.

“Oh, right. Uh, sorry. _Mr. Hwang_. Hi.” He said, nodding at the man.

“Hi.”

“Hi…”

“Right… Anyway. Good work today. _Seungmin_ , isn’t it?” He said, facing the young boy, who placed his phone down next to the chair and jumped off of his seat excitedly to run towards his Dad for a hug.

“Yes! It’s Seungmin! I can’t wait to start the actual auditions, Mr. Hwang! I hope that I can have a line in the fairies’ scene. I want to be _Peaseblossom_!”

“I’m sure you’ll do great, Seung.” Changbin replied, patting the back of his hair from behind. Seungmin nodded and went to fetch his schoolbooks and the little tablet that he had, slipping it into his tiny satchel, leaving the two men alone for just a moment.

“What’s the play, then?” Changbin asked, turning to Hyunjin, clearly dragging the encounter out for way longer than it needed to be.

“We’re doing a modern version of _A Midsummer’s Night’s Dream_. We’re trying to get the go ahead to perform it at a proper theatre, this year, rather than at the school auditorium. It’ll be a big deal, for sure.” He said plainly, eyes flittering around the room. He coughed to clear his throat through his _hopefully-not-too-obvious_ discomfort.

Changbin blinked at him a few times, it was evident he wasn’t used to seeing him in this light. He even noticed the tiny glimmer of a _grin_ tugging at his lower lip. Seungmin handed him his books and tablet, which he took, scooting them under his arm, pulling his car keys out of his pocket.

“Seung, car’s parked in the second space next to the door, I’ll be there in a moment, okay? I just want to have a word with your _teacher_.” He said, handing him the keys to his presumed _Mercedes_ , looking at the logo on the keyring. Hyunjin immediately rolled his eyes, exhaling.

“Okay Dad. I hope I can show you that I can perform the part well, Mr. Hwang.” He beamed, turning back to him. “Thank you!” 

“No problem, Seungmin. Well done for today.” He responded, waving the young boy off.

“So, out of all the schools you could work at, you work _here_ , at the high school across the road from my kids’ school?” He laughed. “I guess it’s fate?”

“Oh, stop, there’s no such thing. It’s just a seriously _annoying_ coincidence, is all.”

“You’re mad, huh?” Changbin teased, cockily licking his lip, like he always did.

“No, I’m fine, why would I be mad?”

“About the that night at mine, a few weeks back?” He laughed.

“Oh _please_. I messaged a few friends, and we went back out to another bar afterwards. Makes no difference to me who I end up with at the end of the night.”

“Right, well. I’m sorry if it pissed you off, or whatever but—”

“—Whatever, it’s no big deal.” He said with a huff, turning around back in the direction of the desk with the projector on it, startling to rustle through the papers and scripts scattered over it, tapping them together to gather them in his hands. “Anyway, I’m at work, I shouldn’t talk about that kind of stuff at work…”

Changbin strolled across to him, leaning his palm on the desk from behind him, trying to tilt his head around to catch his eye.

“I mean, I get you were frustrated but come on, my son was upset? What do you expect me—"

Hyunjin slammed the pile of scripts down, back on to the table with a _thud_ , much harder than he’d anticipated. He took a breath to compose himself.

“Look, I know, okay? I know I’m an asshole and there’s absolutely no reason I should’ve been pissed off at you talking to your own kid on the phone, yada yada. Is that what you want to hear, Changbin?”

“Wait, what? You’re actually _admitting_ that you overreacted?” Changbin scoffed, feigned amazement across his face.

“If it gets you to get the _hell out of here_ quicker, then yes. That’s what I’m saying.” He retorted, smiling at him.

“That doesn’t sound like a particularly _genuine_ apology to me… Why do you want to get rid of me so badly? What have I actually done that’s so—”

“You need to stop.” He said, firmly, abruptly turning back round to face him, locking their eyes together and pointing his finger in his face. “You need to stop talking to me; you’re exhausting. I’m not going to get into this. I don’t know you, and you don’t know me and that’s the way it needs to stay. Okay? You’re really stifling me and I barely even know you.”

“I mean…? I just came to pick my son up…”

“Then do that. Just collect your son’s stuff and get going, please. It’s nearly midday and I have a lot of stuff to finish up, here.” He turned back to the desk, trying to mask how shaken he was.

He could barely even look at Changbin’s face, remembering back to being draped over his bare body, and kissing him so intensely, running his hands all over him. It felt awkward to remember that they were strangers to each other. 

“Alright, fine. Well, see you around, I guess…” Changbin responded, wandering back towards the door.

“Hopefully not.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're safe pals, we didn't need to change the rating  
> phew, thanks seungmin, that was a close one


	4. Love Sought Is Good, But Given Unsought, Is Better

*:･ﾟ✧

“Do you think that new substitute teacher is gay?” Hyunjin asked, leaning over the back of his chair to glance across the staff lunchroom, shovelling his chopsticks into his mouth. “It’s Wednesday, and he hasn’t even spoken to me once since Monday. He’s not even introduced himself. Do you think he’s into me?”

“The one who’s covering Mr. Choi? I don’t think so. I think he wears a wedding ring, but I can’t say I’ve particularly noticed.” Jisung said, shovelling some rolled omelette into his mouth in one big mouthful. Hyunjin groaned and turned back around to look at him, snapping out of his little daydream.

“It’s okay, Sung. Minho isn’t here… You don’t have to pretend like other men don’t exist anymore, you know.” He teased, shaking his head in dismay.

“It’s not that I’m pretending! It’s just that… No one really compares to Minho, is all.” He said smugly, smiling so widely that his eyes near enough became non-existent, covered by his cheeks. Hyunjin fake gagged, dropping his chopsticks down with a clatter, lurching over his plate to dramatically hold his stomach. 

“Ergh, you’re in so deep, you’re _drowning,_ and it’s only been like a few months…”

“Correction, I’m _floating_ , and it feels incredible, thank you.” Jisung retorted, smiling just as brightly, shovelling more rice into his cheeks, too. “We’re just, perfect for each other, I guess.”

“Look at you, with your _compartmentalised_ lunchbox…” Hyunjin whined, picking up the lid with his index finger and thumb, and lifting it up like it was _radioactiv_ e with a disgusted look on his face. “And tell me Minho has _not_ put a note in your lunch saying, ‘Have a great day’…” Hyunjin mocked, peeling the little sticky note off of the lid of Jisung’s lunchbox with his finger. “I thought _so_ much better of him. He’s never going to hear the end of this...”

“Oh, stop being such a buzz-kill. It’s sweet! It’s thoughtful.” Jisung scoffed, snatching the note back from him from across the table.

“The gushy stuff I expect from _you_ , but not from Minho. I’m so disappointed…” Hyunjin sighed.

“What about you then, huh? You messaged the group chat saying you stayed the night with that rich guy you hooked up with, and that you were kind of interested in him. Then we never heard anything else about it? You even said you wanted to see him again!” Jisung exclaimed. 

“Oh, right, _that_.” He sighed, smoothing his bangs back as he leant his face on his palm, leaning against his elbow. He scraped his chopsticks across his plate in a circle with the other hand, acting totally nonchalant. “Well, nothing really happened. I must have just emotionally blacked out because of the alcohol, had a mind-slip, or something. False alarm, don’t worry.”

“I wasn’t worried... I was actually kind of _excited_ at the prospect of you finding someone one of these days, Jin!” Jisung responded enthusiastically, his cheeks now fit to burst with the amount of food he was shovelling in them. Hyunjin did wonder how he stayed so tiny with the amount of food he consumed.

“Not likely.”

“The double dates would be so fun—”

“Stop. I’m going to throw up in your cute, little lunchbox, Sungie.”

“You and Minho get on really well, it’d be great to be able to spend time with you and your, _someone special!”_

For a moment, Hyunjin was so consumed at the nauseating notion of having dinner dates with Minho and Jisung that he totally almost forgot the _colossal_ elephant in the room. He considered, perhaps Minho might _not_ be so welcoming if he found out that Hyunjin would theoretically be bringing his _ex-husband_ around for dinner with him and his new boyfriend…

Only theoretically. He didn’t even know why he thought about it like that, because it was such a ridiculous notion in the first place.

“Also, Chan said that you hooked up with _'some guy_ ' at Arcadia bar a few weeks back? He said it was someone who you’d _‘met’_ a few weeks before…? Apparently, he was dripping in designer stuff, seemed like he had a bit of money behind him?” Jisung said, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows and prodding at his arm across the table with his index finger.

Hyunjin’s heart started beating a little faster at the sudden accusation.

He had wondered for a while if he should’ve told Jisung and Minho that it was Changbin he’d hooked up with, but he figured he’d have gotten rid of him, by now. He kind of didn’t expect to be teaching Minho and Seungmin’s _son_ after it happened, but he was sure that as soon as the last workshop was over, he’d finally be free of him and no one would even need to know it happened at all.

“Was it, perhaps, _the same guy_?” Jisung said, poking at his arm again. Hyunjin exhaled, placing his chopsticks down on the table and lowering his voice. He really couldn’t lie to Jisung, it wasn’t in the nature of their friendship. He tried to play it down as much as possible.

“Look, okay, it was the same guy, but it’s not a big deal, it’s just—"

“I knew it! Hyunjin! Gah, I’m so excited for you!” Jisung excitedly barked, smiling with all his teeth on show and grabbing at Hyunjin’s arm, making his his face slip off of the palm he was leaning against.

“No, don’t be! It’s nothing! I’m serious, it’s honestly nothing!” Hyunjin retorted defensively.

“Chan said he was pretty good looking, too, well built? He sounds like your type. I can’t wait to meet him.”

 _Oh, you’ve met him…_ Hyunjin thought, nervously fidgeting in his chair.

“Sung, like I said. Nothing’s happening. I called it off, it was just a stupid two-night thing instead of a stupid one-night thing. That’s all. You won’t be ‘meeting him’, there’s no one to meet.”

“Hyunjin, you’re blushing...” Jisung said, bursting into little giggles.

Hyunjin threw his hands up over his ears to feel for the apparent heat. Jisung was right, he really _was_ blushing. He screwed his face up and slumped back in the shoddy lunchroom chair that made far too much noise, watching Jisung sniggering at his own expense…

Jisung’s phone suddenly pinged, and he reached for it, instantly smiling as soon as he looked at the screen.

“Minho’s cooking a family-sized Tteokbokki tonight, you want in? He says he doesn’t mind.” He said.

“You see, Jisung. _This_ is why I don’t do relationships. You have to ask _permission_ to do stuff and have people over, it’s so tiresome.” Hyunjin whined, slumping even lower in the chair to the point where he was virtually horizontal, checked his own phone in tandem. He had over twenty messages that he hadn’t responded to, and over thirty-thousand emails... Life was so exhausting when you were exponentially attractive.

“It’s not _permission_ Hyunjin, it’s just called mutual respect!” Jisung retorted. “If he weren’t feeling great, I wouldn’t invite people over. If the boys were upset, I wouldn’t invite people over. if I wanted to be alone for a night, he wouldn’t invite people over, either. Being in a committed relationship isn’t losing your free will, you know…”

“Whatever.”

“Honestly, you get attention all the time, you spend less money, you get treated to dates and gifts…” He suppressed his voice a little, looking around the staff room before leaning in to whisper to him “Sex pretty much whenever you want it… _Kids permitting,_ of course. Honestly, it sounds like you in a nutshell, actually. You really ought to try it...”

Hyunjin hoisted his body back up in the chair, holding out his phone to display the stack of messages. 

“Okay, firstly, again, I get sex whenever I want it anyw—"

“Hwang, may I have a moment of your time?” A low, scholarly voice interjected, and Hyunjin nearly launched himself into the next stratosphere, coughing and spluttering. He was fairly sure he’d just _inhaled_ his asparagus. “Apologies to disturb you during your lunchbreak, but I really would like to have a word with you.” The voice continued.

He turned around suddenly, putting his hand over his mouth to mask the food that was dangerously close to falling out of it in his surprise.

It was the Principal.

“Oh, of course, Sir! It’s not a problem, at all!” He stammered nervously, ferociously chewing the rest of his mouthful down. He lifted himself up from the chair before quickly looking back to Jisung, who looked just as horrified as he did.

“Follow me, please.” The man said decisively, turning heel to head back out of the room, his steel-capped leather shoes clicking across the laminate and demanding attention from all of the other teachers in the break room. Hyunjin nervously followed him, Jisung waving and mouthing ‘ _Oooh you’re in trouble_!’ to him as he left.

He led him out of the staff room and down the main hall, the students bowing at him as he walked past. They came to the Principal's office and not one single word had been muttered between them, and Hyunjin audibly gulped. He had no idea what he’d done, this time. He’d even started wearing _button-up work shirts_ as of late, trying not to cringe when he saw how frumpy they made him look.

He ambled into the office with his head low, taking a seat in one of the two the worn-out, brown, leather chairs perched up against the side of the tiny box room on the opposite side of the mahogany desk. It felt kind of foisty, and he could see the little dust particles scattering around the room through the slats in the half-open blinds, casting a blocky pattern over everything.

Hyunjin suddenly had a flashback to a staff Christmas party two years ago, where he’d _occupied_ that desk… That substitute teacher never did come back…

He suddenly felt even more uneasy, the Principal barely even looking him in the eye as he slowly lowered down in to the seat at his desk, making some _old man sounds_ as he did; almost certainly at the aches and pains in his worn-out joints making him breathless. He placed his elbows on the desk and brought his hands together, tapping his fingers simultaneously in a rhythm as he sat, looking back up to him.

“Hwang, you’ve really impressed me, you know.” He said, matter-of-factly.

“M-Me? Sir? I have?”

“How you managed to get the go ahead to perform at the _Jeongdong Theater_ , I’ll never know.” The man said, a smile slipping through his steely expression, much to Hyunjin’s surprise. He reached for something in the drawer beneath his left hand, rattling around in it for a while.

“The Jeongdong Theater, Sir? I hadn’t heard anything from them? I was told it was unlikely we could perform there, as the waiting list is so long and the sponsorship, we’d need to get the funding for that place would be—”

“Well, they sent this through today.” The man interjected. He picked up an envelope that had been ripped open at the top, slipping a pastel-green, pleated letter out of it, and unfolding it.

“W-what’s th—”

“It’s a confirmation of the booking. Three nights at the Jeongdong Playhouse; ‘ _A Midsummer’s Nights Dream, directed by Hwang Hyunjin.’_ Congratulations, Hwang, this certainly is _very_ impressive for your first year working on the production.” The man said, leaning forward and placing his hand firmly on his shoulder and rattling him backwards and forwards a little. Hyunjin’s body kind of just flopped around limply; he was in a total stupor.

He seized the envelope from his hand, pulling the paper fully out and skimming over the text, totally forgetting who he was snatching it from for a moment.

“They… They booked us?! But, how?!” He asked, totally astonished.

“This is significant news, Mr. Hwang. I’m sure all the local tabloids would love to advertise for it. It’ll be the biggest production we’ve ever carried out; the students will be so excited to get a chance to perform in a real theatre production.”

“T-thank you, Sir.” He said, dozily looking over the letter again. “I just… I don’t even remember them accepting.”

*:･ﾟ✧

“I want to sit next to Uncle Hyunjin!” Felix whined, gripping the back of the chair that Seungmin had sat on with his tiny hands, all of his fingers grasped firmly around the wood as he bobbed up and down. “Please, please, please!” 

“Felix, we don’t pout like that, okay? This is Minho’s house, not ours.” Jisung responded, shaking his head from his place at what Hyunjin presumed was ‘his seat’ at Minho’s table. He could hear the older man scoff at him from the counter where he was finalising the Tteokbokki, in his rather fetching white, lap apron.

“But this is my seat…” Seungmin said back, furrowing his brows a little, but trying to hide his irritation.

“Seung, maybe just for today you could let Felix sit in your chair, as we have a guest over?” Minho fussed, turning back to look at him. “He doesn’t get to see Hyunjin very often.”

“If you really want to, Lix, that’s okay with me.” He responded, strangely rationally, pushing himself out of the chair and wandering around to the other side next to the littler brother that Hyunjin had, once again, forgotten the name of. That one was so quiet, he’d barely even spoken the entire time Hyunjin was there, despite them meeting a few times in passing.

“Thank you, Seung. Thank you for being grown up about it.” Minho cooed, looking at Jisung with a grin and a cocked eyebrow. It looked like he was showing off how well-behaved his kid was, pride radiating off of him. He slipped behind them both, planting a comforting hand to Seungmin’s and Jisung’s’ shoulders, his fingers affectionately squeezing the top of Jisung’s arm.

As far as little kids went, Seungmin really wasn’t too bad.

He’d even told him how excited he was for the next workshop and started a little conversation with him whilst Minho was serving up, about what the next weeks’ topic was, as if Hyunjin had even planned that far ahead yet. The workshop was in three days, so that was more of a _three-days-away problem_ , rather than a _now-problem_.

It was clear that he was sucking up to him a bit again, reacting enthusiastically to everything he was saying, and replying in certain ways, trying to illicit a response from him. He had to respect the grind; this kid really wanted a part in the play, and he wasn’t afraid to show it. Doing everything he could to assure he got what he wanted.

He almost reminded him of himself when he was that age.

Minho finally sat down at the table, taking his place at the head of it, telling everyone to dig in. It was some of the best Tteokbokki he’d ever had. The perfect level of chewiness, the perfect consistency, the perfect spice amount. It was definitely a step up from his own cooking, not like it was difficult. He’d gotten so used to mini-mart food by this point, only occasionally splashing out for takeout maybe once a month if he could stretch his money far enough.

“Mr. Hwang speaks English really well, Dad.” Seungmin said, looking to Minho.

“Yes, I know.” Jisung instinctively responded, nodding in his direction. “We went to college together.”

“And also, he is really good at piano too, and good at helping me with my pitch!”

“Okay, Seung.” Minho nodded.

“And also, Mr. Hwang said that I was doing really well in the class, didn’t you, Mr. Hwang?”

“Seungmin, maybe just dial it back a little, you’ve barely even touched your plate!” Minho laughed.

“Mr. Hwang said that we’re going to perform in a proper theatre!” He beamed, looking across to Jisung again. “ _I-If_ I _get_ a part, I mean!” He corrected himself, causing Hyunjin to giggle a little at his confidence.

“Well, Seungmin. You know I’m not allowed to say anything about the outcome of the auditions... But I have a _strong suspicion_ that Titania the Fairy Queen might just pick you to be in the play…” He said playfully, shooting a little smile at him across the table.

He watched Seungmin’s fake, _shocked face_ as he looked between Jisung and Minho, followed by a wide grin as he gripped his little chopsticks so hard it looked like he was about to snap them in two. He rattled them around in his hands, kicking his little feet under the table.

“Don’t tell anyone though….” Hyunjin said, putting his finger to his lip.

“I won’t! I promise, Mr. Hwang!” He replied, miming pulling a little zip across his mouth and nodding.

As far as little kids went, Seungmin really was alright. 

They chatted amongst themselves whilst they ate, mostly discussing school and work. Felix even reminded him about how he’d promised that he would bring some of the old school props from the last play of Excalibur. Felix _insisting_ that he needed the cloak that King Arthur wore to complete his wizard costume. It went quiet for a moment whilst Minho collected the plates together.

“That was really tasty, Daddy.” The little one suddenly said, popping his head up, his first interaction of the night. “You’re so good at cooking. Thank you.”

“Thank you, Jeongin.” Minho cooed, placing his hand over top of his head, stroking through his shiny, black bangs.

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

*:･ﾟ✧

By the time Hyunjin had driven home and clambered back up to his shitty apartment building, it was nearing 10:00pm. He’d stayed at Minho’s for a little while, just relaxing on his couch and watching a movie with them and their kids. He’d stayed curled up with little cuddlebug Felix, for most of the evening, which felt like a strangely welcome change of pace.

Felix was utterly adorable, and even though he smelt like paint sometimes, a part of Hyunjin always felt a little emotional about watching him get a little bit bigger, every time he saw him.

Minho’s couch was so comfortable and luxurious, he’d even dozed off for a moment, totally content with Felix’s head resting on his lap and the little ginger cat that had appeared, wrapped up next to him.

Hyunjin couldn’t deny that he was somewhat jealous of Minho. He seemed to have everything figured out already, and now he had Jisung, too. He was the perfect round-off just to his perfectly wonderful, little life with his great house, stable job and his polite kids…

He didn’t know why he was bothered all of a sudden; relationships didn’t suit him and he’d certainly never even considered having a family in a long time, certainly not since his blow-out with his ex. Whenever he thought about it, it sent a shiver down his spine. Who wants to be with someone who’s all sappy with them, and be surrounded by stifling little kids all the time?

He shook the idea off.

Little unwelcome thoughts about how cute Minho’s youngest little boy was, kept getting trapped inside his subconscious as he made his way into the elevator.

He slammed his balled-up fist against the button for his floor, knowing by now that you needed to hit it with considerable force to get it to respond. He was on the twelfth floor, the highest one. The only real redeeming feature of his apartment was the view, the bleak, ashen-grey buildings that he was used to seeing, lit up with hundreds of little sparkles; the lights from the windows in the distance painting a pretty pattern across the nights sky.

Living in the city was noisy and kind of burdensome, and during the day, it was nothing but concrete walls and rude-ass people that always got in his way. When it was late, though, the relaxing night views _almost_ made it worth it.

He wondered if maybe one day he’d live in one of those pleasant, suburban neighbourhoods like Minho and Jisung did. Maybe in one of those newly built houses that were just so pristine and perfect, and had walk-in closets and cloakrooms and chandeliers like Changbin’s di—

He shook the idea off, again.

If he lived away from the city, how would he get into the bars? How would he enjoy the nightlife? You couldn’t go out dancing when you had kids and lived thirty minutes from the city, anyway, right?

He stumbled slowly back to his door, nodding to greet his young, bleach-blonde, female neighbour who looked perpetually tired. She was leaning out of the hall’s large communal balcony window to have a cigarette. Hyunjin had stopped reporting it; no one really seemed to care.

He jammed the key in the lock, turning it backwards and forwards three times to get it to open, and headed in, slipping his shoes off and flicking the lights on. He walked across to the window of his studio space, pulling back the curtains to take the view in again. Although, today, it was somewhat obstructed by a shiny, new scaffolding and ‘EDEN BUILDING PROJECT, COMING SOON’ sign. He sighed.

His apartment was minuscule, but he’d made it his own in the last few years. He’d removed the wallpaper down from one side of the room to expose the beautiful brickwork, put up some little floating shelves for his ceramics. He’d light a few candles every now and then, and try to relax, the best he could with the sound of his neighbour’s music thumping through the walls and shaking his photo frames.

He flumped down on to his couch with a sigh; it felt nothing like Minho’s.

Whenever he got himself in to one of these ‘slumps’, as he called it, he considered going ' _out, out_ ' to take his mind off of things. Maybe just to one bar, for one drink, to unwind a little. He knew it was a dangerous idea, he had work in the morning, and he usually couldn’t stop himself from having another drink if someone offered him one.

He was seemingly doing a lot better than he thought he was at work, too, considering this afternoon’s meeting with the Principal, so it was probably a good idea to try and keep it up, and not come in to work looking like death warmed up. There was a little niggling feeling inside of him though; _find someone, find anyone._

He looked at his phone, gawking at the twenty messages that had amalgamated over the last few months. He had so many messages, and he probably didn’t know who most of these people even were, anymore. He scanned through, swiping at the screen to find a potential, luckily, he’d had the foresight to rate the guys next to their newly-acquired titles.

There was ‘ _guy from caramel 7.5/10’_ , ‘ _gas station guy 6/10’_ and even ‘ _buff guy from bowling alley 8/10’_. He decided he could probably make a night of it, find some cute guy from his contacts list, and get them to invite him over. It seemed simple enough.

Suddenly, another message came through, from an unknown number.

* * *

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

I hate to admit it.

But you playing hard-to-get really pushes my buttons, you know.

who’s this?

omg donghyun I stg

look I told you, there is /no way in hell/

i’m not gonna wear that for you

i’m down for dressing up and stuff but it’s way too far

you need therapy

don’t contact me

ever

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

Who’s Donghyun?

Serious lack of context, there.

wait, it’s not actually…

who is this?

i don’t have your number saved???

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

Guess?

if you think you’re important enough to waste my time on guessing games

you have another thing coming phone stranger

blocking you

byeeeee

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

You’re not even gonna thank me for getting your school’s play booked at the Jeongdong?

wait

WHAT

who is this?????

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

It’s cute how serious you are at work.

I kinda like it.

And that cute little ruffled shirt. Adorable.

who tf?!?!

wait

WAIT

omg you cannot be serious….

Changbin?

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

The one and only.

how the hell did you get my number?

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

You wrote it on my window the first time we met, remember?

you have got to be kidding me….

i knew it

i knew you were into me

omg the lengths you will go to

just to spend time with me

just say you’re obsessed and go

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

Seungmin says you’re great, by the way.

I thought you hated kids?

You seem to have made a good impression on him, Mr. Hwang.

i don’t /hate/ anything

except for taffeta

and snake print…

i just said that they annoy me, which is very valid

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

I don’t think you hate kids

I think they hate you

And you can’t stand it when anyone doesn’t like you because you need constant validation.

thanks for the unwarranted psychoanalysis but i’ll think you’ll find

everyone likes me

including you, clearly

too much, in fact

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

If everyone likes you

Why are you single?

i’m single cause i choose to be, einstein

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

Isn’t that what everyone who’s lonely, says?

could be worse

i could have two kids and be divorced at thirty.

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

Ouch... 

It’s not so bad

Date whoever you like 

Go wherever you like

Spend your money on what you like...

oh really?

and what do you like to spend money on?

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

Whatever I want.

More so, /whoever/ I want...

… i’m listening?

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

What did this Donghyun want you to wear then?

goodbye changbin

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

See you around, Mr. Hwang.

hopefully not

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

You really like to have the last word, huh?

look who’s talking

**_\+ 082-165-5557-071 Unknown Number_ **

I’ll let you have this one, just cause you looked so good when I last saw you.

please

i look good all the time...

* * *

He waited patiently for the response, which never came. He really did let him have the last word...

Hyunjin leant back, slumping even further down his couch, setting his phone down and rubbing over his eyes with his palms, making his vision go a little splotchy and blurry with pressure. _The purple haze_ was rising again, the strange _fog_ complicating his rational thoughts, obscuring his vision.

Those intrusive ideas of being curled up next to someone, were flooding back again.

He envisioned being swept up in strong, warm arms, nuzzling his head into someone’s chest, two sets of legs tangled in the soft, fuzzy material of a warm blanket.

Those kinds of thoughts had started to plague him again without warning, and it was all _his_ fault. Every time he thought of Changbin, he thought of that night. The feeling of being marvelled at, having his fingers interlocking with someone elses', being kissed like he was the only person that mattered on this planet.

Which was somewhat ironic, because at this very moment in time, he really felt like he didn’t matter to anybody, not even himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so, i kind of realised just how much these characters probably wouldn't make sense to anyone that hasn't read number 16 so... sorry about that lmao. i guess i'm just presuming that most people here are from there!
> 
> ...but omg i'd missed writing little!lix so much reee. minsung sailing so strong in this fic it's *chef's kiss*
> 
> it's sad hours for our boy hj. someone needs to cheer him up. 
> 
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	5. For I Am Falser Than Vows Made In Wine

*:･ﾟ✧

“That’s great Yujun, just try and make it a little bit bigger! Big, sweeping movements, okay?!” Hyunjin said loudly, motioning his hands above his head. “Look at Seungmin, look how big his wings are. That’s how grand it needs to be!”

Hyunjin knew he was showing a little favouritism in his workshops, but the play meant a lot to him, and he needed to ensure that the little kids didn’t mess up his chances of getting a good review from the Principal.

“Great work today guys! I think some of the parents are coming through now. Remember, next week we’re going to assign parts okay? So, make sure you prepare something for the rest of us to see!” He said enthusiastically, clapping his hands together. They all bowed and thanked him before shuffling towards the door, their parents drifting into the room, picking up their kids one-by-one.

Typically, he was left with the same two kids as last week, Yuna; the tiny, little girl with the straight black bangs (which today were slightly curled), and Seungmin, who was rehearsing his soliloquy in the middle of the performance space.

“Seungmin, you have a week to practice!” Hyunjin chuckled, gathering his things to push them in to his bag.

“I know Mr. Hwang, but I really want a part so I’ll prepare as hard as I can!” He beamed, standing tall and bowing towards him in a grandiose manner. Hyunjin chuckled at him.

As far as little kids went, Seungmin really wasn’t too bad.

“I hope when I move up to this school that you’ll teach me, Mr. Hwang. I like your lessons, they’re really fun.” He said, linking his little hands together in front of him and smiling so widely, his warmth radiated across the room. 

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

He turned around to see a figure, all dressed in black bounding in, a long, black coat just covering a white button up shirt and tie, and the same black _Prada_ cap he’d seen before. He looked up from his phone, a smile immediately appearing across his face.

“ _Mr. Seo_.” Hyunjin said, noticing the man waltzing in through from across from the reception desk. “So nice to see you! Two weeks in a row… I thought it was Minho’s weekend…?” He said, looking the older man up and down.

“Yeah, it is, but I offered to collect Seung this week, too. Minho’s been really busy recently and I was on my way to my other office in Jung-gu anyway…”

“ _Obsessed…_ ” He muttered under his breath.

“—What was that?”

“I said, wow! I’m _impressed_! What a devoted lover of Shakespeare.” He mocked, through gritted teeth, crossing his arms firmly across his chest.

“Hey Dad!” Seungmin shouted, noticing his Dad from across the way. He came bouncing over, his little white and blue baseball jacket swinging off of his shoulders.

“Hey, Seung. How was your class today?” Changbin asked, placing his hand on the top of his head, pulling him closer to his side.

“It was really good. Mr. Hwang said my hot seat was really well acted!” He beamed, smiling smugly, looking up at the older man.

“You did really well, today, Seungmin.” Hyunjin interjected, nodding fondly at him. “I’m going to wait for Yuna’s parents to get her, now. I’ll see you for the last workshop and audition, okay?”

“Yes! Thanks, Mr. Hwang!” He said, bowing, then holding his hand out for a high five. Hyunjin obliged, holding his hand up too for the little one to press his hand against it.

“Are parents allowed to come to the auditions?” Changbin suddenly asked.

“No, _unfortunately_ , Mr. Seo, they’re not.”

“But it’s on a Saturday, right? That’s not technically school time?” He pestered, tilting his head.

Hyunjin clenched his teeth again, trying to maintain his composure on the outside. This man really knew how to rile him up.

“Well…”

“Awesome. I’ll be here. Get your stuff together and get your coat on, Seung.” Changbin said, gesturing to his school bags and assortment of _tablet,_ _phone_ , and _Oxford English Dictionary_. He turned back slowly, slipping his hands back into his pockets, then looking back up self-contentedly from under his cap at how irritated he’d effectively made him.

Hyunjin’s smile slipped away as soon as Seungmin had his back turned.

“Right, so what do you want then, huh? What do I have to _repay_ you with, Changbin?” He exhaled, looking back to the man in front of him, making sure to stifle his volume so neither of the kids heard anything.

“It’s not like that, Hyunjin. Sheesh, you think so little of me…” The older man teased, pretending to be offended at the accusation.

“No, no, it’s _‘not like that’_ , not at all! I thought I’d just _pay twelve-million won just to hire out a professional theatre because I just_ _love the arts_ , that much!” Hyunjin said, his cheeks starting to flush in his frustration.

He hated how Changbin barely flinched, barely responded. He seldom even showed any signs that Hyunjin’s rejection of his advances were getting to him; in fact, it seemed to spur him on even more. Hyunjin on the other hand, was a hot mess.

“You think I did this just to hold it over you, huh?”

“Well, didn’t you? I tell you to keep away from me, and yet here you are, pestering me like some kind of weird stalker?”

“Surely this is what you wanted right? You said you liked it when guys spoiled you, gave you what you wanted...” He sucked his bottom lip in between his teeth, Hyunjin’s eyes immediately darting down to look at his mouth. “So, now I’m doing just that. Is there a problem…?”

“Spoiled as in, I like expensive jewellery and high-end, designer clothes, not pitying me and embarrassing me at work…” He leaned in, a little quieter than before, maintaining his sugar-coated tone. “By the way, you’re _tapped_ if you think I’m going to sleep with you as a repayment for this.”

“I’m not trying to get you in to bed, Hyunjin.” He responded.

“Whatever.”

“I could get that without really trying, trust me.”

“You’re having delusions again, Changbin. Get well soon!” He scoffed.

“I’m sure I’d get better a lot sooner if I had _you_ at my bedside…” Changbin said, before looking back across to Seungmin, who just about had a handle on all the numerous things he’d brought along to the workshop. 

“I—”

“So, Minho said you and ‘ _the gang’_ were heading out tonight, huh? For his birthday?”

“Did he now…? And why would he tell _you_ that?” Hyunjin retorted, cocking an eyebrow.

“We’re on good terms now. We fought a little when things went down between us but, since then we’ve actually been getting on pretty well. Feels good to move on, you know?”

“No, I don’t.” He snapped. “Nor do I care.”

“Anyway, he invited me along.” Changbin said, cutting his trail of thought suddenly. Hyunjin’s mouth dropped wide open, eyebrows gathering into a repulsed expression.

“He invited you?!”

“Yeah, but I have a work thing, unfortunately.” He sighed.

“Oh no, what a shame.”

“Though, I told him I’d try and make it afterwards, if I could, but no promises.”

“No one asked.” Hyunjin scoffed, rolling his eyes back and wandering back towards the projector desk.

“Anyway, I have to get going but I’ll be seeing you around, I presume?”

“Hopefully not…” He muttered under his breath. He didn’t even give the man the satisfaction of eye contact, staring blankly down at his paperwork whilst Changbin and Seungmin shuffled out behind him. Hyunjin balled his fists up so hard that he could feel his fingernails scraping along the insides of his palms.

He hated to admit it, but not getting the last word frustrated him to no end; and he hated it even more so considering that Changbin had clocked on to it. His temples were thumping, and he turned back round to lean his palms backwards and perch against the desk, exhaling the fury away.

He glanced towards the door as they left. He saw Seungmin poke his head back up through glass panel window next to it, with his little mouth open in a goofy smile whilst he waved at him. His long, jacket sleeve dangling over the tops of his fingers, flailing from side-to-side. He mouthed “ _bye bye!”_ before slipping away.

*:･ﾟ✧

Jisung had hired out a one of the function rooms in Arcadia, the club he and Chan had been to, last time. It felt bizarre being _out, out_ again, he hadn’t had a drink in a while, other than the odd glass of wine he’d decimated when he was emotionally spiralling out of control due to another drama he’d finished.

He realised that he hadn’t been here since his last run in with Changbin.

As they slipped through the familiar swing doors into the neon pink, slightly sweaty room, various guests welcomed Minho with hugs and ‘ _Happy Birthday_!’ cheers, palming gifts off to him that he could barely carry, before he set them aside near the entrance.

They headed across to one of the tables as a four, the three of them taking a seat whilst Chan offered to get the first round in, enthusiastically bounding off to the bar.

It wasn’t really an officially planned birthday party, more so a casual gathering of whoever bothered to show up if they could get out on short notice. Most of Minho’s friends were older, and a lot of them had kids, so Hyunjin felt slightly out of his element.

He scanned the room for potentials like he always did, no one particularly catching his eye. He considered if he got really bored here, he could slip away to the ‘exclusive bar’ and find the young, mid-twenties guy with the long, black hair that sold the VIP tickets…

He saw _one guy_ looking at him, perched up against one of the stools, confidently staring at him when they clocked eyes. He looked presentable enough, a white T-shirt and a jean jacket, though he had to admit there was far too much denim going on for his liking.

He wondered if he were openly-out, or one of those ‘straight’ guys that would spend a few nights with him and then experience the biggest sexuality crisis’ of their entire lives… He thought probably the latter, judging by the double denim.

He considered that he could use the same ‘Dad tactics’ he used on Changbin, as they seemed to have the desired effect, last time.

He shook it off, before downing a half-pint of mojito that he’d picked up off of someone’s table when he walked in, picking the mint out of his mouth afterwards, totally forgetting about the man staring at him as soon as Changbin crossed his mind.

“Jin, that guy over there is giving you the eye.” Chan said, returning to the table with a tray full of drinks and eight shots…

“Yeah, I’ve noticed. He’s okay…” Hyunjin huffed.

“Are you blind? Daeshim’s one of the football coaches at the school. He’s at least an eight-out-of-ten?” Minho replied in shock. Jisung turned to him, a dramatic, ‘offended’ expression across his face, making Minho roll his eyes and pat the back of his hand.

“I mean… Yeah he’s ripped but, it looks like, there’s nothing beyond that… He looks… _Rigid_. Uncomfortable. Who’s looking for washboard abs these days? Boring.” He sighed.

“Are you feeling alright, Jinnie?” Chan chuckled. “He’s totally your type?” He waved his hand in front of his face, then clicked his fingers in front of him a few times to check he was alive. 

“Hmm. Yeah, I’m fine. All I know is, I’m gonna need something stronger than this.”

“Well then…” Jisung said teasingly, picking up one of the shots. “Chan, take yours. Minho. Hyunjin.” They all took their respective shot glasses and clinked them together. It felt relieving to be surrounded by good people, after a week of stroppy adolescents and pretentious school inspectors.

“To Minho!” They all shouted it in chorus, Minho watching them all grimace at the taste of their own shots disappearing into their gullets. Hyunjin had mastered hiding his displeasure for any spirits by this point, everyone would always comment on how well he took them.

Really, it was more of an act. The shot tasted like paint stripper and eternal despair.

*:･ﾟ✧

“Minho! Take another shot!” Jisung slurred, bringing over another little tray of four shot glasses filled to the brim with bright green liquid. Chan started whooping and clapping from Minho’s side, totally way past being able to control the volume of his voice.

“Jisung, if I do any more shots now, I’ll ruin my makeup… My eyes are still watering from the last bunch…” Minho whined.

“You’re already beautiful, without it!” Jisung said sweetly, setting the tray down on the table and giving him the _toothies_ t grin Hyunjin had ever seen.

“ _Ergh,_ stop.” They all groaned in chorus, even Minho, himself…

“Awh, come on! When do we ever have a night to have fun without the boys? It’s your birthday!” Jisung whined, carefully lifting one of the glasses from the tray, and sitting down next to him. “Down in one!” He chanted.

“Jisung, I’d rather just—”

“—What’s that? _Mr. Uptight, the Sequel?_ ” Jisung teased, his eyes widening. 

“ _Return of the Buzzkill?”_ Hyunjin said.

“ _The Killjoy Strikes Back_?” Chan added, giggling.

“Ugh. Fuck you guys.” He said, snatching the shot glass and downing it in one, rolling his eyes as he did.

Hyunjin spent most of the night at his table, surprisingly. He was content, happily accepting all of the rounds that Chan was buying; Chan being one of the few people that never expected anything in return. They sipped on the complimentary _birthday champagne_ at the table too, which tasted way too sweet and partially watered down, but it was free, so he drank it regardless.

He flirted _a little_ with the football guy at the bar, but ultimately, he smelt kind of like _sports_ and cheap body spray, and Hyunjin got a _way over-confident_ feeling from him that he didn’t vibe with.

Changbin’s arrogance was kind of different, he was self-confident in a unique way, almost teasingly. This guy, on the other hand, was clearly just a douche.

Then, they all decided to do the ‘house challenge’ which was four shots of Tequila consecutively, which was, in hindsight, a truly horrific idea as it was all he could taste for the next hour.

He decided to give his taste buds a break, instead choosing strawberry daquiris and vodka mixers for a while. The table was getting louder and louder as time went on, most of their conversations turning in to babble and incomprehensible giggles.

At one point, Jisung and Minho were literally making out next to him, whilst he and Chan posed for a picture next to them with their thumbs up, tagging it on _Instagram_ with ‘# _DadsGoneWild_ ’ and ‘ _#GetARoom’_

He was glad Minho was having a good time. It was great that Jisung made him so happy, too. He couldn’t even imagine what he and Changbin would have been like together, considering how well Jisung and Minho fitted together like two perfect puzzle pieces.

He suddenly shook himself back to reality, and internally scolded himself about just _how many times_ he’d thought about Changbin in the last few hours, sipping at _yet another_ drink.

“Changbin! I thought you couldn’t make it?” Minho suddenly said, rising suddenly out of his chair from the table.

“I only just finished and came straight here. Happy birthday.” A low, burly voice said, and Hyunjin looked up, to clock Changbin himself.

As if _perfectly on cue_ , there he was, wearing a _Balmain_ fitted graphic T-shirt and some of the most beautifully fitted black pants he’d ever seen on a human being.

He looked _so good_ , so expensive.

 _This was not happening_ , he thought, trying to maintain his composure.

Changbin handed over a silver, glittery, wine-sized gift bag, which Minho accepted with a hug, and as soon as he leant in, Hyunjin could almost smell the rich aroma of sandalwood from across the room, tantalising and torturing him.

He remembered lumbering over him, staring him down with his hands pinned down beside him as they started into each other’s eyes, that same smell ravishing his senses. He felt the purple fog again, and he tried to squeeze his eyes shut for a moment.

As soon as he reopened them, Changbin’s eyes locked with his immediately across from the table, and Hyunjin found himself slinking back into his seat, peering around as if he hadn’t seen him at all. It didn’t look in any way convincing, and he knew it.

“Isn’t that… That guy from last—” Chan started, before Hyunjin instantly cut him off, slamming his hand down on the table.

“More shots?!”

*:･ﾟ✧

“You look better every time I see you.” Changbin said, settling at the stool next to him at the bar.

“You cannot be talking to me right now. Just, move along on to the other chair. Be one stool away from me.” Hyunjin responded, looking straight ahead of him, glancing to the side. There was a little tinge of panic to his voice as he skimmed around to check no one had seen.

“What, why?”

“Because!”

“You haven’t told Minho about us, have you?” He chuckled, scooting over to the next stool along, leaving a gap in between them. “That explains why your curly friend was so awkward the whole time I was sitting at your table.”

“Firstly, there is no ‘ _us’_ , and secondly, I get with so many guys I guess it just slipped my mind.”

“My bad. Kind of thought sleeping with your friend’s ex-husband was something newsworthy?”

He was right, and suddenly Hyunjin felt like the worst friend since Brutus offed Caesar. He hadn’t known Minho long, only the months he’d been with Jisung, but they were like two kindred spirits that seemed to connect so well. Plus, Jisung meant a lot to him; more than anything. They’d been friends for fifteen years, it seemed utterly insane that he wouldn’t have told them, by now.

“Yeah well… Maybe I’m just embarrassed.”

“Ouch.” He scoffed.

Hyunjin rolled his eyes at the little pity party Changbin was throwing. Another one of his tactics for making him feel guilty; he was so transparent.

“Seungmin hasn’t stopped talking about you.” Changbin said, sipping his beer, turning his head to face him.

“Yeah?” Hyunjin said, looking back towards him, then instantly pulling his head back to look ahead.

“Yeah. He really enjoys your classes. He says you’re a good teacher.”

“You’re not going to bribe me in to giving Seungmin a part, are you, is that your angle, here?” Hyunjin murmured.

“What?”

“Because honestly, he’s _actually_ talented, so you don’t need to be so petty and hold everything over me, all the time.” He scoffed, slightly slurring his words through his drunkenness.

“I’m not holding anything over you? Geez, what’s wrong with you? Can’t you just take the fucking compliment?” He said, grabbing his beer glass off of the bar and throwing the rest of it back down his throat.

“I don’t need your compliments. I don’t know why you’re even here talking to me.” Hyunjin replied, his words laced with bitterness.

“Well, you know what? Me neither.” Changbin immediately got up, swinging his leg around the other side of the bar, pushing himself up with his hands.

Hyunjin’s eyes followed him as he left the bar, and for a brief moment, he wanted to go after him, but he didn’t really know why. He was about to call his name, when he saw Minho looking in his direction, so he sat back down, and pretended like nothing had even happened. It was better that way.

He could feel his tear ducts stinging a little, the alcohol making him a little more emotional than usual. He saw Changbin heading out of the door from the function room in the reflection of the mirrored wall behind the bar, slamming it closed as he went. 

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

That, or his _stomach_ was actually twisting, as he felt his insides starting to curdle.

*:･ﾟ✧

He didn’t know how he got there, but he was definitely in the back of a cab. The feel of the leather seats beneath his palms, the tight constriction of the seatbelt caging his chest down, and the overwhelmingly cheap air freshener scent covering the smell of cigarettes. He’d been drunk in the back of enough cabs to know he was in one, but that was _all_ he knew…

He peeled open his eyes, his eyelids drooping so low he could barely see anything. He looked around the hazy images forming in front of him, he was behind the front passenger seat.

Everything hurt, his head, his stomach, and his knees, but he couldn’t remember why.

He allowed his head to lull to the side, looking at his own hand resting in the middle seat. His fingers were being covered by other, smaller fingers with a chunky gun-metal ring on the pinkie, someone gently holding their hand over top of his.

He slipped his hand back out of the hold and glanced upwards, sluggishly. The fog was devastating now, and everything was doubled, if not tripled, but it was undoubtably, _Changbin._

He felt a strange sense of relief.

“Take me hooome.” He whined, his voice totally shot, slumping his head back against the headrest and wailing into the empty air.

“Shhh.” He responded, looking nervously to the driver in the mirror in front. “We’re getting you home, Hyunjin.”

“Noooo….” He mumbled. “Take me back to _your_ home.” He said, probably not as sensually as he’d wanted it to sound. It probably came across more, grating, and whiny, than anything.

He launched forward, and then turned, blinking a few times to try and make out the details of Changbin’s face. His little chin scar, the dark eyes, the soft cheeks, anything. Much to little avail; he could barely see anything, and when his eyes did manage to focus, everything else seemed to disappear behind him.

Suddenly he unhooked the front part of the seatbelt from over his chest, slipping under it and lunging his lips towards Changbin’s neck across the space in between them, he managed to kiss him just once, before Changbin ducked away from him immediately, shifting himself closer to his side of the car.

“Hyunjin, you’re so far gone.” Changbin retorted, placing his hands in front of him to gently push him backwards towards his own seat. “Sit down.”

“Come on… _Pleaaase?”_ He leaned back across again, this time to rest his head on Changbin’s shoulder.

Hyunjin generally found it difficult to take any kind of rejection, and drunk Hyunjin _certainly_ wouldn’t stand for it. He started to wander his fingers up the older man’s leg, little, tiny index-finger tiptoes surveying his outer, to his inner thigh. Suddenly he felt his wrist being seized, Changbin grasping his arm and locking it in mid-air.

“Hyunjin, absolutely not.” He said, firmly, turning to look him directly in his eyes for a moment.

The younger man removed his head from his shoulder and flopped it back against the leather of the chair to sulk, his body still facing inwards, turned to lean in towards him. They stayed like that for a little while, just them, the sound of the traffic outside of the car and the soft radio playing in the background. He observed Changbin actively ignoring him.

It only made him crave him, more.

“Come on, don’t you _want_ me?” He teased, a slight grin appearing across his face. He shifted his body closer to the side, knowing the movement would slightly part the buttons at the top of his shirt to expose a little more of his bare chest.

“Hyunjin, you know what you do to me, but you need to just, slow down. Maybe another time.” Changbin retorted, a slightly exasperated laugh fell from his lips as he looked back towards the window, trying to zone out and ignore him, taking in the cars speeding past them.

“I _know_ you want me, Changbin… You haven’t stopped thinking about me since we met…” He garbled, with a certain level of self-assurance that he thought would come across as evocative. “The way we kissed that night… I’ve not stopped thinking about it either… The way that you looked at me...”

"Oh _really?_ You haven't stopped thinking about me?" Changbin scoffed, twisting back to him, shaking his head at the _state_ that Hyunjin was in. He opened his mouth to speak again, then stopped, clearly deciding it was best not to provoke him or make anything worse. He turned back to the window, and Hyunjin felt his own fists clenching. 

“Come on Changbin... Make me feel _beautiful_ again...” Hyunjin whined, pouting his lower lip out in response, furrowing his brow into a little, mopey expression.

He reached his hand out, to clutch at Changbin’s hand, which was positioned over his own thigh just above his kneecap. Changbin looked back at him, slightly bewildered at the gesture and the choice of words.

“What?”

Hyunjin clutched his hand tightly, cupping it in both palms, pinning it down against the seat in between them, leaning forward, his voice low and raspy.

“When you look at me, you make me feel so good.”

“People look at you all the time, Hyunjin. It’s not news.”

“Not like you… You look at me…” He trailed off, searching to find the words through his shrouded mind. “You look at me, _differently._ You look at me like I’m the only person, ever…”

“I-What? You’re not making any sense.”

“Take me to _youuurs_ …” He whined once more, lifting their hands, and interlocking their fingers in place, running the back of Changbin’s hand across his cheek.

“Hyunjin… You’re not thinking.” He responded, his words sounding a little shaken.

“Pretty please…?” He begged.

“I’m serious, Hyunjin, it’s not a good idea…”

“But ‘good’ is never fun… Come on… I _need_ you, Changbin.”

There was a silence between them as they looked at each other, the lights from the cars passing illuminating them with streaks of red for a few seconds at a time. Hyunjin watched him glance down to his lips, his eyes travelling from each eye, to his mouth. He watched the older man swallow harshly, he knew he was about to give in.

“Fine.” He sighed, “Let’s go back to mine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *screams SAFF STOP MAKING YOUR CHAPTERS 4.5K WORDS NOONE WANTS TO READ ALL OF THAT SHIT in to the void*
> 
> i'm sorry  
> i hope you enjoyed hyunjin thinking about changbin 25 hours a day 8 days a week. there's a lot of dialogue in this so i guess it feels slightly different than my previous chapters but hopefully it's comprehendible! i have a strong suspicion that hyunjin has feelings for changbin, idk just a guess 
> 
> <3  
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	6. I Wish Mine Eyes Would, With Themselves, Shut Up My Thoughts

*:･ﾟ✧

He sprawled out, stretching his arms across the pillows, clutching at the silky material underneath him. His vision was purple under his lids, a little hazed over and overwhelmingly bright. He parted his eyes, wincing at the light shining in through the large, bay window on his left.

“Morning.” A voice rang out. “Well, kind of.”

Changbin strolled in, in a large, grey hoodie and tracksuit bottoms, the most casual Hyunjin had ever seen him. Not that he could really ‘see him’ through the haze of his vision. He was barefaced and slightly puffy, just like the first morning-after that he’d seen him.

“C-Changbin?”

“The one and only.” He said, making his way across to the side of the bed, gently perching down on it with a glass in his hand, the light from the window casting a rainbow-patterned reflection through the crystal, scattering colored flecks across the wall like fairy lights.

“What time is it?” Hyunjin groaned, brushing at his eyes with his balled-up fists to try and bring himself back to reality, rubbing little circles into his sockets to clear the lavender blur.

“About midday.”

“What?! Midday?!” Hyunjin shouted, eyes flying open, eyes flicking across to the alarm clock on the nightstand. It read 11:49am.

“Yep. You passed out as soon as you landed last night, so I tucked you in and you slept the whole night through. You looked peaceful, so I just let you rest most of your hangover off. Here, drink some water.” He said, leaning across, handing the glass over.

Hyunjin slipped up from under the soft material over him, holding it over his front with one hand to keep his bare chest covered and reaching for the glass with the other.

“Thanks…” He said, tentatively, accepting the tumbler and taking a sip. “Did you… Undress me? Where are my clothes?” He asked, throwing him a slightly puzzled look, and glancing around the room. There weren’t any clothes on the floor, like normal. Everything was totally immaculate and pristine.

“You were throwing up, Hyunjin, they were totally ruined… I just got you into pyjama pants... Plus, it’s nothing I haven’t seen before…”

“Oh my God…” Hyunjin groaned.

“You were… Yeah. Quite a mess, last night.” Changbin said, chuckling at the end of his sentence.

“I’m… I don’t remember anything.”

“It’s probably for the best.”

“Did I… I mean, did _we_ …?” He looked across, noticing how he was sprawled out over only one side of the bed, Changbin’s ‘side’ mysterious empty.

“No, of course not. I wouldn’t ever try anything with you in that state.” He laughed. “Any other time _maybe_ , but not like that.”

“Oh, thank God.”

“You know, I thought you’d end up in my bed at the end of the night, and I was right… Just, I wasn’t expecting it to be _without me_.” He scoffed.

“It’s so much nicer this way.” Hyunjin said, handing the glass back over to him and throwing himself backwards against the plush pillows again. He star-fished himself out across the king-sized bed, nuzzling closely into the comforter, gripping it in his hands to bring it to his nose. He appreciated the scent, it smelt like sandalwood and peaches and a tiny hint of elderflower. “Honestly, I could get used to this.” He hummed, taking in the warmth, closing his eyes.

“Are you hungry?” Changbin asked, placing his hands on his knees to push himself up, rising from the bed.

“A little. I didn’t really eat a lot before I went out. I thought it’d get me drunk, quicker…”

“Well, you weren’t wrong…. My Chef’s cooking if you want lunch.”

“Your _Chef_?!” Hyunjin said, his eyes opening again.

“Yeah, I’ll get something. Hang on.”

Hyunjin sat up in the bed again, watching Changbin as wandered out, before glancing around the monochromatic room. It was so clean and organised, it appealed to his minimalistic style. A large bed, a mirrored closet, some side tables, and just a small amount of ‘acceptable’ clutter – a few notes and drawings pinned to a noteboard on the back of his door, probably from his kids.

He saw a picture of them, too. A little photo of them happily smiling at the beach, with their legs buried in sand, mounted in a chrome photo frame on the other nightstand. It was, kind of cute, actually.

There was a slight chill in the air whenever he dropped the comforter a little too low, the breeze from the partially-opened window filtering through. He didn’t mind though; it helped to clear his groggy head and masked the slight smell of tequila seeping out of his pores.

He reached across for his phone. He could see he had messages, voice mails and calls, too many to count; a lot of them from Minho and Jisung. _That could be a later problem,_ he thought, tossing it aside on the bed and pushing his hands through his hair, exhaling deeply.

Changbin ambled back in, a thick, wooden tray in his hands, numerous little bowls, kongnamul bap, galbi, mandu, some kind of seaweed soup, what looked like some tofu, too.

“Wow, I’m not _that_ hungry!” Hyunjin replied, startled by the mass of the food piled up in front of him. On one hand he was so starved that he could feel his stomach _digesting_ itself, but on the other hand, the fishy smell of the seaweed soup wasn’t agreeing with him, either.

“It’s for me, too… I do _live_ here…?” Changbin scoffed, placing the weighted tray down over Hyunjin’s lap.

He grasped at it with both hands, taking in how phenomenal it all looked. Changbin really was living his dream, and he was only a year older. He wracked his brain for a little bit, scanning over the nicely presented bowls in front of him.

“Why are you being so nice to me?” He asked. “From what I can remember, which _isn’t a lot_ … I wasn’t exactly _pleasant_ to you, last night, when we spoke…”

“No, well, I guess, I can tell when someone’s actually an asshole, and when they’re just _acting_ like one.” He said, strolling over to his TV stand and fetching the remote before wandering back to settle down on the bed again. Hyunjin watched his every movement, eagle eyed. “Besides, it’s not what you said to me _last night_. It’s what you said to me in the _morning_ when we got home.” He smirked, shooting the younger man a wink.

“What’s that supposed to mean…?” Hyunjin said, looking a little puzzled.

“Oh nothing… Just you, _admitting_ that you’ve been thinking about me ever since we first hooked up.” He said arrogantly, smirking.

“I did not say that.”

“Yes, you did, with your whole chest.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“I got your address from Jisung and offered you a ride home in the same cab, but you were all over me asking to come back here, so I obliged because you were so _insistent_.” He teased.

“Whatever, you’re just making that up.”

“Luckily, for you I’m a decent enough guy, anyone else could have seriously taken advantage of you. You should be more careful.”

“What a noble man you are. Truly, _Prince Charming_.” Hyunjin said, rolling his eyes, taking one of the sets of chopsticks and shovelling some of the braised galbi into his mouth.

Hyunjin had to thank _drunk Hyunjin_ for one thing, at least; the fact that he’d convinced Changbin to take him back _here_ , rather than this apartment. Exposing how shitty his part of the city was, would surely give Changbin something to hold over him and taunt him about.

He didn’t often have company over, only really the close group of friends he had, and although he wasn’t exactly _ashamed_ of his studio, it definitely didn’t compare to what Changbin had, here, and it wasn’t often that he ever let people in to his own space. It had been six years since he’d brought someone back to his own bed.

Changbin pulled his oversized hoodie off, tossing it across the room, throwing it perfectly in the hamper. Underneath he was just wearing a thin black t-shirt with a little white logo. He couldn’t help but notice the way stretched across his pecs, and perfectly wrapped around his biceps.

Hyunjin didn’t know if it was the galbi, or the man in front of him that suddenly brought his salivary glands to life, but they were working overtime.

“What’re you doing?” Hyunjin said, slightly taken aback by Changbin lifting the blanket to slip his legs underneath it. He perched up against the back headboard to sit next to him, re-arranging the pillow to prop up behind his back and lifting the comforter to pull it over his lap. He reached for the other set of chopsticks, leaning across Hyunjin’s arm.

“Getting into _my_ bed?” He said, with a laugh. He took a mouthful of some of the tofu, before clicking on the widescreen he had mounted on the wall. Some terrible, overly saturated commercials were playing, and everything just felt _grossly domestic._

“Right…” Hyunjin replied. 

They sat in silence for a moment, Hyunjin not really knowing what exactly the protocol was, here. So instead, he just ate his breakfast, taking in the rich flavours and delicious textures that would probably keep him satisfied for at least a week. He tried not to focus on how Changbin was shifting his body closer to him, edging further into the middle of the bed until their arms were touching, little by little.

It set his skin ablaze, the temperature of his arms compared to the cool breeze travelling through the room. He felt the fog, the warm feeling surrounding him again.

“You know, last night, I know you probably don’t remember, but… You said that you liked the way I looked at you.” Changbin said, casually dipping one of the dumplings into the soup, gazing back to look up at him, before shoving it in his mouth.

“The way you _look at me?_ What does that mean?” Hyunjin questioned.

“Well, I don’t know? Y _ou_ were the one that said it! Like you’re the ‘only person that existed’, or something.” He said, with a mouthful of dumpling.

“Drunken babble. Just ignore me…” He stuttered, looking back ahead to the TV.

“You said that I made you feel like you were beautiful, or pretty, or something.”

“Ugh, please stop.”

“You are, though.” He replied.

Hyunjin turned to look at him, not quite sure of what to say. He could see the fondness in Changbin’s eyes again; it reminded him of that same meddling, yearning feeling from before when he’d wanted to _kiss him so badly_ , so desperately, like his life depended on it. 

“Changbin…”

“You said that you liked the way that I kissed you, that time, too. When we were laying here.” He said, as if he’d read the other man’s mind. He patted the bed, giving Hyunjin a sly, little look that was half alluring, and half infuriating as hell.

“Well… I…” Hyunjin stuttered, “Look, I guess… It was, a change of pace, is all. I just don’t usually do all that kind of stuff beforehand, you know? You made it feel like… I don’t know. It just felt kind of different, weird.”

“You felt like you were actually _worth_ kissing, for once?”

“Shut up. I never said ‘different’ was a good thing…” Hyunjin scoffed, immediately defensive.

“I know it meant something to you, at least.”

“You don’t know that… You know nothing about me.”

“I mean, I’d like to, though.”

“Changbin...” Hyunjin said, sighing. The words weren’t really coming to him, so he decided to end the conversation the only way he knew how. “I’m gonna head home. I’ve wasted the entire morning.”

He lifted the comforter, slipping his legs over the edge of the bed. The cool air from the window reached his bare skin, giving him a sudden onslaught of goosebumps, all his hairs standing on end. He wrapped his arms around himself as he got up to look at himself in the mirror.

“Yeah. I probably should too, I need to get to the office.” Changbin replied, reaching over to look at his phone.

“On a Sunday?” He said, turning back.

“Yeah? I need to make sure my Dad hasn’t _fired anyone_ in my absence… Do you need anything else before you go? Painkiller, coffee, or something?”

Hyunjin looked back at this morose reflection in the mirror, “No, I’m fine.”

It was kind of a lie. He looked like crap, and he had bruises all over his torso that for once, weren’t down to someone inflicting them on him in a fit of passion. The yellowish bruises were all likely self-perpetrated, and his whole body ached, desperately wanting to fall back to sleep.

“No worries. There’s clothes in there, if you want to get home in something that doesn’t smell like the inside of your stomach…” Changbin scoffed, gesturing across to the other side of the room.

“Thanks…”

Hyunjin made his way across to the closet, cracking it open just like the first time he was here, though this time it felt entirely different.

There were so many beautiful pieces in his closet, he didn’t even know where to begin. He pulled out the first thing that garnered his attention; a black, silk shirt with a green and gold, meandros-patterned, decorative border around both of the cuffs. It was breath-taking, and it still had the tags on, like it was brand new...

He knew Changbin probably wouldn’t allow him to take it, but it didn’t stop him slipping it over his arms just to feel expensive, just for a moment. He glided around in it, the top three buttons unclasped, appreciating the feeling of the luxurious material sifting over his skin.

He looked in the mirror again, seeing how it draped over his shoulders. He saw Changbin’s reflection in the mirror, too. He was still eating, tapping away at his phone, like it was some _average day_.

He couldn’t explain it, but he wanted, or _needed_ Changbin to look at him.

He didn’t know why he wasn’t already looking at him; he usually watched him so attentively.

He deemed maybe he wasn’t as attractive in the morning, with his hair slightly matted and his face carrying some morning bloat. He also had some pretty bad under-eye bags, considering how much he’d slept.

He shook the feeling off.

“What, someone on your phone is more important than how good I look in this?” He said, a sudden spout of feigned confidence rushing over him again, bringing him back to his element.

"No, it’s just my Da— _Wow_...” Changbin said, looking back to him from over his phone, his mouth slightly open as he ogled him, wide-eyed. “That looks _so_ much better on you."

"Really?" Hyunjin replied impishly, secretly soaking up the compliment with a smile on his face, smoothing it against his sides.

"Totally. You should keep it."

"What?! It's _Versace_ , I couldn't do that--" He spun back around at the ridiculous suggestion, blinking his eyes a few times.

"I insist.”

“The tags aren’t even off?!”

“That’s because I haven’t found a use for it yet. Honestly, take it.”

Changbin suddenly got up, pushing the breakfast tray aside. He pulled his arms behind him, bucking his elbows, stretching to release some tension from his back. Hyunjin wondered if he’d slept somewhere uncomfortable on his behalf, so that Hyunjin could sleep alone in his bed.

That, or he wanted Hyunjin to notice the broadness of his chest, which he did...

He placed his phone down again, and slipped across the room to where he was, padding across the carpet. He looked him up and down in the mirror brazenly, drawing his lip between his teeth at the sight of him, before grabbing on to his wrists, pulling him back around to face him head on.

He gazed at him again, then leaned in, making Hyunjin pull backwards at the sudden infringement of his personal space.

He’d actually moved in forwards to fasten two more buttons up, until the silk shirt was firmly affixed to his body. Then he leaned up, _likely tiptoeing_ , to straighten the collar around his neck.

His hands lingered around his neck for a little too long, Hyunjin smelling the scent across his wrists and the occasional swipe of his fingers against his nape. Suddenly, Changbin wrenched at the shirt, ripping the tag clean off, and Hyunjin nearly felt like he was about to faint.

“Oh my God, be careful!” He screamed, throwing his hands behind his neck, mortified at the force being used.

“There.” Changbin replied, calmly, smoothing the shirt down from top to bottom, stroking down Hyunjin’s chest, then across his shoulders with his palms. “Now I can’t return it, so you have to keep it.” He dropped his arms down, to gently linger at either side of Hyunjin’s hips.

“I- I... Thank you.” He stammered, suddenly hyper-aware of their proximities. “Anyway, I really should get going.”

“Okay. Well, keep the shirt. I’ll bring your clothes back next week when I come to watch Seung’s audition, okay?” The older man asked, looking at him and cocking an eyebrow.

No, it wasn’t okay. _Obviously, it wasn’t okay_ , Hyunjin screamed in his head.

He needed to say no, he needed to reinforce the protective barriers that were crumbling down around him every time Changbin was around. He wanted to cry out, to yell at him to stop giving him stuff, stop seeking him out, stop thinking about him.

But he couldn’t.

He knew that by this point, he was in too deep with Changbin. The idea of cutting ties with him seemed tangible, _at first_. But by now, he knew that Changbin had a strange pull over him; a pull that Hyunjin couldn't get away from, even if he tried.

“S-Sure, thanks. I guess I'll see you then.”

*:･ﾟ✧

😻Minhooo:

So, when were you going to tell me, then?

i assume you’re talking about changbin

i mean

i kind of wasn’t going to tell you at the start

i didn’t think it was a big deal at the time

but i mean now that i think about it…..

😻Minhooo:

Hyunjin…

You don’t think that you sleeping with my ex-husband of eight years and the father of my two kids is ‘a big deal’?

Hyunjin… Come on, seriously?

What the hell were you thinking?

i mean, not now?

i’m sorry

i’m so shit

😻Minhooo:

What, did you think I’d fly off the handle or something?

Like I’m not mature enough to ‘cope with it’?

We’re grown adults, Hyunjin.

I kind of didn’t expect it but I also didn’t fucking expect you to flat out pretend that nothing happened, either.

we’ve kind of

had /encounters/ i guess

😻Minhooo:

Since the talent show?

And more than once, I presume, considering how you were acting with him yesterday?

Wtf?

i’m really sorry minho i have no idea why i didn’t tell you

plus i also don’t really know how i was acting because i don’t remember anything

😻Minhooo:

So, you two, are clearly ‘a thing’?

it’s not like that

we’re not dating

please don’t be mad

😻Minhooo:

Jin, why the hell would I be mad at the idea of you two together?

It’s nothing weird like that, I’m not mad per se, I’m just kind of confused…!? I just kind of find it a bit strange that you didn’t tell me.

You know I’m happy with Jisung.

Happier than I’ve ever been.

i know

i promise nothing is going to happen we don’t have like feelings for each other or anything it’s just a fling??

😻Minhooo:

A fling? Hyunjin you literally turned down every guy that hit on you last night.

And you cried to me and Sung for like, over an hour?

i did?

god, i’m so sorry i’m so embarrassed

i don’t usually get emotional when i drink

i can’t even remember the last time i did

😻Minhooo:

You cried because of Changbin, Hyunjin.

changbin????????????

why????

😻Minhooo:

You said that you’d upset him, and that you didn’t mean to, so you cried.

And then he came over to try and console you and you literally couldn’t take your hands off of him and insisted on going home with him…

Cat was kind of out of the bag by that point…

oh my god

i’m mortified

😻Minhooo:

Don’t be, it happens to everyone.

We all had a good night, you only cried at the end.

It’s just… Weird to me, I guess.

I just? Idk how to feel about it? I mean I guess I’m happy for you?

i can’t believe i cried

😻Minhooo:

What happened after?

he basically tucked me in,,,

like a baby

i was apparently out like a light

😻Minhooo:

You really were pretty bad by the end of the night.

i’m sorry if i ruined your birthday minho.

i promise i’ll call the whole thing off!

not that there’s even like, a ‘thing’ or whatever.

i don’t know what’s come over me recently.

i think just being around you and jisung when you’re so happy together makes me feel like i’m just at the sidelines sometimes.

maybe i was just bored and idk.

it’s really dumb and it doesn’t matter

😻Minhooo:

Firstly, you didn’t ruin my birthday, Hyunjin. I actually had a great night.

And secondly, this hasn’t got anything to do with you ‘being at the side lines’ Jin.

Jisung (and me, now) are still here for you, nothing’s changed.

You don’t have to pretend like you’re not interested in him because of me. If you want to pursue something, go ahead. I’m not stopping you.

it’s not like that!!!

* * *

Minho didn’t respond to his last message, and Hyunjin found himself sinking back down in to his slightly-too-firm couch, wrapping himself a little tighter in his grey, fuzzy blanket in despondency.

He leaned across his coffee table, picking up a red marker pen, looking at the pile of work he’d been putting off ever since he got home, tapping it on the edge of the wood, before circling a few little errors on one of his students papers.

He’d been trying, but his brain was fried, and coupled with the extreme bouts of nausea he’d felt all day due to yesterday nights’ antics; he couldn’t find the mental headspace to deal with anything right now.

The only thing pre-occupying his mind, _rent free_ , was Changbin.

He peered down to the dress shirt he was wearing. The black silk, with the intricately-handwoven embroidery that was _so magnificent_ he was sure he wasn’t actually worthy of wearing it. He lifted the material at his wrist and leant down to smell it. It smelt like Changbin’s house, like his room; sandalwood and peaches and a tiny hint of elderflower.

He thought about how on Earth he could face him on Saturday, knowing that he’d cried about upsetting him in front of Minho and Jisung. Knowing that he’d _‘begged’_ him to let him stay. Knowing that he’d told him how much he’d been thinking about him. He felt totally helpless, not fully ever knowing what he might have said.

It was humiliating on so many levels, and he wondered how badly Changbin would hold it over him. _Maybe he would be indebted to him forever_ , he thought, as he gripped tighter at the blanket to wrap it further over himself, perching his chin on his knees.

He had the heating on, but the heat seemed to just disappear through the brickwork in his apartment. The only thing keeping him warm was the instant ramen he’d picked up from the table, cupped in his hands, which was all he could stomach at the moment.

It felt nothing like being cuddled up with Felix on Minho’s couch, and it certainly felt nothing like being in Changbin’s bed, either.

He sighed.

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slightly shorter chapter today, mostly hyunjin's thoughts and the aftermath of before, so not a lot really 'happened' in this chap, i guess lol
> 
> thank you so much for 200 kudos on this!! it really means a lot to me 🥺
> 
> *screams someone please love ficdad!changbin he's an angel, in to the void* 
> 
> <3  
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	7. What’s In A Name?

*:･ﾟ✧

“Good morning, Ms. Jung!” Jisung said, happily swinging into the teachers’ lounge with his newly acquired geometric-patterned lunch bag over his shoulder and his other hand in his pocket, smiling from ear to ear. “Good morning, Mr. Min! Oh…! Good morning, _Mr. Hwang_!” He said, eagerly looking towards Hyunjin. “Or… Should I call you _Mr. Seo?_! Did you double-barrel?! Maybe Seo-Hwang? Hwang-Seo?”

“Shut… Up, Jisung I swear to God.” Hyunjin grumbled.

“Wow, you really kept that one a secret, huh?” He chuckled, clanging around in his back pocket for his keys to his locker, eagerly pushing them in and turning the tumbler. “I mean, I was definitely surprised but I guess it kind of makes sense.”

He shoved his lunch box in, slinging his coat off and shoving it inside, too, before wandering over to the grimy staff room kitchenette that Hyunjin wouldn’t dare even prepare cup ramen, in. 

“Jisung… Please, I’m still suffering and it’s two days later…” He said, rubbing his fingers against his temples just underneath of his navy beret. He slumped over the table and lightly banged his forehead against it three times, each time with a little ‘ow’.

“I mean, I have to say Jin, since the whole situation with Minho, I’ve been kind of glad that me and Changbin are on good grounds. I’d say we even get on well, these days. Though, I think Minho might need to warm to the idea, just a little.”

“Why does it even matter? Doesn’t it annoy _you_ that he was bothered about me sleeping with his ex?”

“Not at all. Minho and I are fine, we’re more than fine. I think he was just shocked. Plus, he’s just particularly bad at being out-of-the-know.” He reached for the coffee machine, pouring a generous amount from the pot into his flask. “I put it down to being in that little gossip circle with the _baseball Moms_ at the school…” He laughed. “He’ll be fine. You seem really into him, I’m glad—”

“Jisung. It’s not like that. I got stupidly drunk and said some stuff I didn’t actually mean. It’s just…”

“Drunk words, sober thoughts, right?” Jisung said, turning back to look at him with a suggestive eyebrow jiggle. He made his way back across the room, pulling out the chair and plunging down into it, directly opposite of Hyunjin. He took a few obnoxiously loud swigs of his coffee to mask out the sound of Hyunjin’s _groaning,_ watching as the blonde slumped his body across the table and buried his head in his arms.

“Jin… You can’t keep doing this.” Jisung said, reaching out his arm across the table, giving him a reaffirming pat before grabbing at his wrist to pull one of his arms away. 

“Doing what?” He replied, muffled by the sound of mouth buried in his blazer’s material. 

“It’s been six years, Jin. You need to get yourself back out there. If there’s something between you guys, you should explore it. Not every guy is like—”

“—We’re nothing alike, Jisung. He’s some rich, douchebag and I’m some—

“ _Wannabe_ -rich, douchebag?” Jisung interjected, teasingly.

Hyunjin reached across the table, slapping down on Jisung’s wrist, shaking his head from side-to-side.

“Hey! Abuse! Don’t make me report you!”

“The Principal wouldn’t do anything about it, I’m totally in his good books right now.”

 _Thanks to Changbin,_ he thought.

“Anyway, I have to focus on the performance. I have my last workshop this Saturday and then we start on actual rehearsals. All the main cast are set, we just need to incorporate the younger kids…” He said, exhaling. He leant back in his chair, smoothing his hands through his hair, and pulling down his blazer at the back from where it had risen.

“Awh, they’re gonna be so cute. How’s Seungie been?” Jisung questioned. 

“He’s great. He’s actually… More than great. He’s a really talented kid.”

“Warming up to younger kids, Jinnie?” Jisung cooed, placing his elbows on the table, and resting his chin in his hands, blinking up at him _knowingly_ through his stupid doe eyes.

Hyunjin arose from his seat, deliberately waltzing the long way around the table, across Jisung’s side to exit, giving him a light slap on the back of the head as he walked past him.

“That’s two strikes!”

“Whatever, lunchbox boy!” Hyunjin shouted down the corridor as he left. 

*:･ﾟ✧

“Okay, let’s go. Yujun, you’re up!” Hyunjin said, gesturing brightly to the stage. A young boy with a hideously-trimmed bowl cut stepped out on stage for his ‘audition’. The idea that it was an ‘audition’ was ludicrous, as all of the children were going to be onstage anyway, it was more of a showmanship thing, Hyunjin thought. Only a few of the fairies had more than one singular line in the whole play.

He watched the group of girls perform a little dance number, in costume, two vocal performances and one of the little boys came out on to stage, cried, and then left. Hyunjin had to rush down to stage to console him, patting his back empathetically and telling him that it was ‘ _going to be okay’_ or whatever it was kids liked to hear when they were upset. 

_Amateur hour,_ Hyunjin thought, summoning the next child to the stage enthusiastically.

Seungmin’s three-minute, spectacular performance included period costume and an entire soliloquy _from memory_ from the Korean adaptation of Romeo and Juliet. Not that Hyunjin doubted he could have actually performed it in English if he set his mind to it.

_“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose,_

_By any other name would smell as sweet!”_

It seemed a _little much_ considering the aforementioned fact that none of the children were actually getting speaking parts, but something about Seungmin’s efforts really touched Hyunjin’s sensibility. For a brief moment he forgot he was watching a _nine-year-old_ perform something that was penned in the middle of the 16th Century…

Seungmin wasn’t a particularly _subtle_ child; and Hyunjin rather liked that. Once his performance had come to an end, he bowed to him from the stage before blowing air-kisses to the other students in the class after he’d finished.

He lost focus for a brief moment when he’d noticed Changbin had slipped in, near the doorway quietly, just before Seungmin’s performance had started. He’d not made a fuss, though he did see the man shoot Seungmin two little thumbs up before he started, which was admittedly, rather cute.

By the end of it, all of the kids clapped and applauded him, chattering amongst themselves, whispering how they’d ‘ _expect nothing less from Class Captain Seungmin_ ’ and discussing how well he could sing, too. It was a shame that it wasn’t a musical, this year, Hyunjin thought.

“Great job everyone! Hyunjin said, rising from his chair and initiating a whole-room applause again. The rest of the kids joined in, giggling, and he could see Changbin lethargically clapping his hands together whilst he _oh-so-casually_ leant against the pillar next to the entrance door, before slipping his hands back in to his pants pocket.

“Cast list will be posted on Monday, everyone did a terrific job, you should all be proud of yourselves!” Hyunjin shouted, rallying them all together. “The parents will be arriving any minute now, so gather your things, everyone!”

All of the kids scuttled around, and Yuna, the little girl with the straight, black bangs even gave him a little wrapped-up present, as a thank you for taking the class, as some of the other students bowed and thanked him for his time, too.

A strange sense of pride started bubbling up inside of him out of nowhere. Hyunjin had never particularly relished in teaching high schoolers who weren’t interested in drama. Most of the kids were forced into it and couldn’t wait to drop the subject, whereas these kids actually enjoyed performing and opted into the workshop.

It felt entirely different, like his efforts were actually appreciated for once.

As Seungmin was in full costume, he had to head to the backstage area to change as the other children started to slip out with their parents. Changbin took the brief moment they were together as his invitation; waltzing down the centre aisle near Hyunjin’s desk with the projector on it, a slight grin as usual. Hyunjin instinctively rose to his feet, facing his back to the older man.

“Nice get up? Didn’t think I’d see you in a suit and tie?” Changbin laughed, taking a few steps closer towards him, he reached for his arm, turning him around to fix it a little before Hyunjin immediately brushed his hand away, scouting around the room to make sure no one saw them.

“Well, after having to wear turtlenecks for a week because someone decided to recreate a _Monet_ piece across my neck, I’ve been on my best behaviour…” He retorted.

“Hmm, I kind of like the sound of that? Round two?” The older man teased.

“You are not flirting with me at work, right now…” Hyunjin sighed, gathering the papers from his desk again and shaking his head.

“Here, I have your shirt and stuff. I think you left your earrings. I remember helping you get them out before you passed out, but I couldn’t find them, I did look for quite a while.” He passed across a white, rectangular, _CHANEL_ paper-bag, a few of his things in there, folded up. Hyunjin grabbed it, immediately dropping it down next to his feet beside him to cover it from sight.

“Thanks.”

“I figured you could have these instead? I haven’t really worn them, and they look kind of similar to the ones you lost, right?” He said, inquisitively. He handed over a ring-sized, navy, suede box. Inside were two diamante studs with a small, black chain hanging down; there was a logo emblazoned on the front, a large, golden V with two curves either side.

“You’re kidding me right now.”

“What?”

“These are _Valentino_.”

“I thought you liked being spoiled?”

“I do but…!”

“But nothing, I told you, I insist.” The older man said, gripping on to both sides of his arms to lock their eyes together.

There was something about Changbin giving Hyunjin gifts which seemed to trigger a monumental shift in his sense of morality. He had absolutely no problem being gifted anything or being bought in to events or parties before, in fact, usually he thrived on the expensive trinkets, but from Changbin, it felt different.

He wondered if it were the thrill of the chase. Usually, guys would be begging to buy him things, but Changbin was just gifting them to him, nonchalantly like it didn’t even mean anything?

He contemplated the _other_ option; that maybe most of the guys that bought him things, he never actually followed up with more than once, so they never really learnt the truth about him. They never learnt that he was just a shitty drama teacher living in an apartment on the twelfth floor of hell, barely scraping by.

Changbin knew that about him by now, and the only way Hyunjin could feasibly interpret it, was _pity._

“You can pay me back by coming out with me, later tonight?” Changbin said, raising his intonation at the end like it was partially a question, moving his hands from Hyunjin’s arms to clasp at his wrists gently. Hyunjin’s eyes moved down his hands, not expecting him to be so forward.

Hyunjin considered that the Valentino earrings were probably just to sweeten him up for the invitation.

“You’re asking me on a _date_. Right here?” He said, bewildered.

“Dinner, or a drink at a bar, or something? I don’t mind paying for anything you want.”

“Of course, you don’t, Changbin.” He said, rolling his eyes again, pulling his arms away from where Changbin had been holding them. 

“Well, I’ll drop Seung back to Minho’s and then we can do something? We swapped weekends last week… So that I could see you.” He said, smiling.

“Wait, you’re _admitting_ that you switched your days with your kids to see me?” Hyunjin said. He never thought he’d actually hear Changbin confess that following him around was actually intentional. “Wow. You really are obsessed…” Hyunjin scoffed, making Changbin’s smile falter a little.

“Says you, Mr. _‘I-Haven’t’-Stopped-Thinking-About-Kissing-You’_ …” Changbin retorted, a slight glimmer in his eye.

“Foul play… I was drunk.” Hyunjin whined, folding his arms across his front.

"I'm ready to go Dad!" Seungmin finally ambled out, still in his Shakespearian makeup, but carrying his white, linen ruff shift and beige knee-length breeches over his arm. His rucksack was hiked up high on his back, and his little blue lunchbox dangling in his other hand.

“Text me your address, I could come pick you up?” Changbin said, stifling his voice slightly.

“To my apartment?”

“Is that okay?”

“Not really? Why would I want you to know where I live?”

“I mean, you know where I live… But, sure. I guess I can send a cab for you?” Changbin replied, slightly perplexed.

He pondered for a moment. He wondered if accepting _Valentino_ earrings and then turning someone down for a date was a shitty thing to do. Still, he’d turned down plenty of guys that had bought him things before, so it shouldn’t bother him. He should just say no. 

“Sure. Why not.”

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin veered through the swing doors that were being held open by two definitely attractive, tall men, dressed in black suits with _saffron pocket squares_. It was a nice place, somewhere in between a restaurant and a ritzy club. The semi-circular bar in the centre drawing most of the attention, but plenty of small-ish booths and tables to sit and eat at. There were black and white photographs of picturesque areas of the city mounted on the wall, bold theatre signs, tall skyscrapers, and a beautiful night scene near the Han river.

The bar was a magnificent, with a marbled black finish. Above the bar was the most phenomenal black-crystal chandelier he’d ever seen, dashing reflections around the room. It suited Changbin’s aesthetic so much, it almost reminded Hyunjin of his bedroom. He wondered if he’d gotten his inspiration, from here.

It was dark, mostly due to the overwhelming presence of matte black _everything_ , but it suited him just fine. It felt almost _sensual, seductive_ , with only the hushed murmurs of the people at the bar and seated at the tables, and the sound of quiet, melodic jazz music playing in the background. Hyunjin found himself lowering his voice as if _for once_ , he didn’t want to make a scene.

Hyunjin usually felt pretty comfortable in _these kinds_ of situations; ones where he had to pretend to be better or more higher-classed than he was. In this case though, Changbin already knew it was a front, so he wasn’t really sure why he was trying.

“Wow, it’s so dreary in here.” Hyunjin whispered, edging through the room, noticing the people that were looking at him. “I kind of love it?”

“I knew you would.” Changbin replied, placing his hand on the small of Hyunjin’s back to guide him through.

He was definitely glad he wore the black, silk that Changbin had gifted to him before. Everyone in here definitely looked like some kind of bigwig. The silk shirt did not go unnoticed by Changbin either; he hadn’t really been able to keep his eyes off of him since he got in the cab.

They’d even managed to _almost_ match clothes, with Changbin wearing a black, _Versace_ shirt too, but his was tighter fitting with a shorter arm to show off his toned biceps. Changbin had already joked about them wearing ‘couple outfits’ twice, already…

They weaved through the main bar, and Changbin greeted a considerable amount of people, shaking numerous hands. Most of the men were fairly welcoming to him too; he was sure he even saw one of the men give Changbin a thumbs up as he passed.

The older man helped Hyunjin take long black coat off once they got to their table, before he slipped it across the back of the chair. The table said _‘_ _Reserved – Seo, Jr._ ’ on a black and silver piece of card, stood up in the middle of the table, and it was pretty far away from the other tables. It felt exclusive.

“Did you eat when you got home? Let’s order food to the table.” Changbin announced, picking up the menu and scanning over it. “Whatever you want.”

“Hmm. How about, a sous vide duck starter and lobster thermidor for mains?!” Hyunjin half-joked, resting his chin over his hands playfully.

“Sure, why not.” Changbin chuckled, taking his phone out for a brief moment to look across his notifications as he sat down. “I’ll order us drinks first, though you should probably go a little easier than before if you want to actually get back home safely tonight.” He glanced at Hyunjin over the top of his phone, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

Hyunjin felt himself _blushing_ , a dusting of pink heating up the tips of his ears. It wasn’t often that men were genuinely concerned for his well-being.

“Not that staying at mine isn’t off the table, though…” Changbin finished, shooting him a wink.

Then, suddenly, there it was again. That infuriating kind of comment that served to remind Hyunjin that all he was to anyone was something to be spoiled, to be objectified and taken back to their place. He didn’t know why it annoyed him; he’d even welcomed it, and spurred it on, before!

But once again, coming from Changbin, it felt, different.

“You know. I could be a murderer.” Hyunjin suddenly snapped, locking his eyes across the table. Changbin looked up from his phone, noticing the change in atmosphere.

“Interesting start to the conversation... Is this how you manage to seduce so many men? By threatening to kill them?” Changbin joked, slipping the toggle at the top of his phone to the other side, to silence it.

“I mean, you literally have no idea about me other that I’m a teacher, yet here you are, spending time with me and spending all this fucking money on me.”

“Woah?” Changbin said, a slightly perplexed expression across his face. “You’re still on this ‘ _you don’t know me’_ mysterious, bullshit, huh?” Changbin mocked. “Come on Hyunjin, I’ve literally been in bed with you, I’ve scraped you off of a floor, I’ve carried you over my shoulder when you couldn’t make it all the way up my drive, I’ve washed your laundry…”

“Well you—”

“Ask me something about me, then? I’ll tell you anything you want to know, then I’ll ask you something about you. Like, a truth or dare kinda thing.” Changbin said, exhaling and relaxing back into his chair.

“What, are we teenagers?” Hyunjin retorted.

“Think of it as a way of getting to know each other.”

“Who says I want to get to know you?!” He scoffed loudly, before a woman walked across wearing a neatly crisp white shirt and black waistcoat, making him suppress himself. As Hyunjin was currently trying to sulk, looking around the room in a huff, Changbin ordered for both of them.

He ordered them a sharing platter-type appetiser and some drinks, a few glasses of green grape soju and a tall, mojito for Hyunjin. He wasn’t actually quite sure how Changbin knew his drink of choice was a mojito, anyway.

“Okay, I’ll go first with a truth. Go ahead. Ask me anything you want.” Changbin said, putting his hands up like he had nothing to hide.

“Okay… Fine…” Hyunjin pondered, biting on his lip a little bit trying to think of something tangible to ask. “Your Dad. You say you’re gonna inherit this big-ass company, right?” He picked up the little card on the table, twisting it in his fingers.

“Right.”

“So, do you actually like your job, or were you forced into it? Do you just do it for the money and the designer stuff?”

“Kind of forced, I was always meant to inherit the company because I’m the only _male_ in my family and my Dad is really, really old-fashioned, in that sense. So, I do it to make my Dad happy. The money is just… Something I guess.” He said, shrugging. “Your turn. What about you? You say you don’t like kids, yet you’re a teacher… Doesn’t add up.”

“Well… I don’t mind it, it’s just… My passion is acting, not _teaching_ acting. Most kids think arts subjects are dumb, and they have no problem showing it…” He side-eyed, putting the little black card back down on the table. “Sometimes being a teacher feels like such an under-valued job. A lot goes into it, behind the scenes.” 

The woman brought their drinks back through, graciously bowing as she left them on the table. Hyunjin lifted the cool glass, taking his mojito to his mouth. It was strong, definitely a double. He smacked his lips together, taking in the minty taste, watching how Changbin admired him from across the table.

“Your turn. Do you still think about Minho, since you broke up?” He looked up over his glass, consumed with his usual playful edge, but honestly, he really was kind of intrigued.

Changbin raised his eyebrows in surprise, obviously not expecting that kind of question to be uttered. To be honest, Hyunjin was also kind of surprised that he asked it too; though he did like making the older man squirm a little.

“I mean, I did, for a while after but, we’d broken up so many times… It kind of wasn’t newsworthy. We just, weren’t suited, I guess. But no, I don’t think of him, especially, not _now_ …” He said, with a grin on his face. “Your turn. What about you? Have you ever been with someone before? Like in a relationship?”

“I—I don’t really, talk about that kind of—"

“—If you don’t tell the truth, you lose.”

“Well, I guess I lose, then.” Hyunjin retorted, throwing himself further back into his chair.

It wasn’t new; people always assumed Hyunjin had little-to-no relationship experience because of his dating preferences; and he liked to keep it that way.

He had actually experienced it all before; the anxious butterflies rising out of the pit of his stomach before the first date. The impatient kisses when they’d walk in the door from a long day at work, unscathed. The excitement of moving in together and deliberating about which color was appropriate for a bathroom tile, wall arrangement.

He’d experienced the entire feeling of being content to be somebody’s, just not for a long time. And maybe never again; no one particularly seemed to be worth all the heartache, in the long run.

“I mean, you could always do a dare, instead?” Changbin suddenly said, snapping him back to the conversation and leaning in closely to him across the table.

“Fine, fire away. What’s the dare?” He said leaning back forward, taking another mischievous sip of his drink.

“Dare you, to kiss me, right now.” The older man said, lurching in even further, leaving barely any space to breathe between them. Hyunjin's breath hitched as he watched him drawing his bottom lip in to his mouth, looking at him with so much longing that he swore the older man could have burst into flames.

“That’s not how dares work, Changbin. That just benefits _you._ ”

“Well, you either answer my question from before, or do the dare, right?”

“Ugh.”

He flung his eyes backwards in their orbits, before grabbing the nape of Changbin’s neck across the table, pulling him in to a hasty kiss. He pressed their lips together impassively for a few seconds before shoving him back into his chair by his chest and looking around, making the older man laugh quietly.

“There, done. Okay, your turn. Where’s the weirdest place you’ve ever had sex?”

“I mean, probably in like… A field when I was teenager, or something…? I don’t know.” He replied. “Why, where was yours?”

“Principal’s office at work.” Hyunjin said with a smirk, _somewhat_ proud of it. 

“Wow, at work... That’s…” Changbin looked taken aback, gasping for some kind of response. Hyunjin rather liked it when he made Changbin speechless. “Fair enough. Your turn. Why do you not want people round your apartment? I asked you earlier and you said you didn’t want—”

“I never said truth…” Hyunjin cut in defensively, slanting his head to the side. “And technically you asked me the same thing that I asked you. So, it’s officially my turn?” He spat, his words laced with bitterness, enough to make Changbin look fairly cautious at what was coming next. 

“Why are you so interested in my personal shit? What’s your angle here?”

“Hyunjin, I was just curious. I just want to get to know you more—”

“Why? There’s nothing to get to know, I’m just, this. You need to stop asking me questions, you’re so much more attractive when you just, don’t talk.”

“Is that so?” Changbin said. He swiped his tongue over his teeth in annoyance. “And you’re so much more attractive when you’re not being a total fucking asshole all the time.” Changbin said much brassier than previously, taking a swig of one of the soju glasses, downing his drink and cocking an eyebrow at him from across the table.

This time, it was Hyunjin who was taken aback. He internally panicked for a moment, before composing himself.

“Oh, well for someone who’s a ‘total fucking asshole’ you certainly do enjoy my company…” Hyunjin said.

“Yeah, and you’d enjoy mine too if you stopped being so defensive all the time. You don’t have to pretend like you’re not attracted to me, Hyunjin. You already told me that you think about me all the time. You’re not fooling anyone.” He scoffed, almost _laughing_ into his drink. It set Hyunjin aflame again, that same condescending tone that he’d take whenever he thought he had something over him.

“Please, I can get any guy I want.” He said, pushing his chair backwards. He started obviously looking around the room, holding his hand out to demonstrate some of his other potential suitors before looking back to Changbin.

“Yeah? Then, why are you here, with me, on a Saturday night?” Changbin replied.

“Because you invited me?!”

“You said you don’t do dates...”

“I don’t?!”

“So, what made you come...?”

“I- I just! I figured I’d let you flounder around me a little more before I get rid of you! Plus, the earrings were kind of nice, maybe I just felt bad for you!” Hyunjin replied, throwing the remainder of his drink down his gullet, and slamming it back down on the table, enough for a few people to turn their heads at the commotion.

There was a silence between them for a minute whilst everyone returned to their own conversations, the air tense and heavy around them. Hyunjin’s vision felt hazy in his frustration, he felt the fog building up behind his eyes.

“You’re such a brat, you know that?” Changbin said, breaking the silence. He spoke quietly, his voice deep and raspy. The dark, menacing look in Changbin’s eyes that were penetrating him across the table; Hyunjin wasn’t sure if he were about to be punched, or devoured, but he knew what he’d prefer.

“Let’s go to your house. Now.” Hyunjin said, abruptly rising from his chair.

“W-wait, why? What about the food?” Changbin stuttered, snapping out of his lust-consumed daze, and pointing to the waitress who was returning with their appetiser, a confused look across her face.

“Let’s get it to-go.” Hyunjin snapped back, wasting no time throwing his coat on.

“Why?”

“You know why!” Hyunjin shouted, grabbing his arm, and yanking him out of his seat. Changbin pulled his wallet out of his back pocket as he did, handing the woman a tip before he was unceremoniously pulled back to the main entrance door, chuckling to himself in a way that totally exasperated Hyunjin to no end. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phewwww! REALLY thought i wasn't gonna get this one done on time but here we are, hopefully it's ok!!!!! ugh i love their chemistry 
> 
> <3 https://twitter.com/YfwbbS


	8. I Would My Father Look’d But With My Eyes

*:･ﾟ✧

"How did... How did you sleep?" Changbin murmured to him, eyes still loosely closed, moving his nose from left to right to nuzzle in closer to his neck. The tip of his nose was slightly colder than the rest of his face, making Hyunjin shiver just a little at the contact. It was, strangely relaxing. 

Changbin removed his arm from across his chest, sliding it down to his hand, lightly gripping at his wrist to ask for permission. Hyunjin tensed a little under his grip, almost instinctively, which was kind of dumb when he thought about it, as they’d held hands plenty last night, more than he’d be willing to admit.

"Fine, thanks. I should probably get up and dressed…" Hyunjin replied, yawning.

"Awh, what? Stay in bed with me, it's nice." The older man mumbled, tugging him back down drearily, totally content with how long he’d been there.

It was nearing 10:30am, and he still hadn’t left, yet. 

"Changbin..." Hyunjin sighed, a little more firmly this time, making him stir. The older man pulled his eyes open, taking in some of the light streaming in from his bedroom window.

Hyunjin lifted himself using his palms, gliding up from the bed, his legs just covered by his black, silk shirt from the night before. He looked into the mirror, like he always did, to check that he looked presentable. The morning bloat usually wasn’t flattering, especially if he’d had a few drinks the night before. He turned to look at himself from different angles, suddenly noticing a mark across his neck.

“Changbin…” He grumbled. “I told you not to give me hickeys… My boss is going to kill me…” He pulled at the collar of his shirt, seeing how high he could tug it to cover the small pink marks on his neck, before wandering back across to the bed, and sitting on the edge of it, exhaling deeply.

“Sorry?” Changbin said, stifling a laugh.

The older man reached over to pick his phone up again, and even from a distance, Hyunjin could see that he had multiple notifications. Hyunjin was used to getting a lot of messages too, but recently, he’d only really been spending time with Jisung and Changbin… Most of his other contacts he’d definitely left on _read._

“Yeah, you should be...” He said, leaning backwards against his palm, looking over his shoulder at the older man, a slight pout on his face.

“You’re the one that was practically foaming at the mouth by the time you were home with me...” Changbin scoffed, looking up from his phone.

“That’s because… Well. You pissed me off and I needed to… Relieve some tension…” He said, opting to slump down on the bed so that he was lying on his back, his legs dangling off the edge. The bedding was so nice, the cotton material felt soft under his fingers. He wondered how much it cost.

"This _thing_ , between us, you can’t deny that it's kinda nice, right?" Changbin said, “You staying here, spending the night? Waking up with me.”

"It's not a _thing_ Changbin... Look, I told you before that—" He said, rolling his eyes, staring off blankly at the ceiling above.

"—That you don't do relationships, blah, blah. But you're attracted to me, I'm attracted to you... So, what are we going to do about that?"

"What are you insinuating…?” Hyunjin replied, peeling himself up again and leaning against his elbow to look back at the man, slight confusion wrinkling his brow. He surely wasn’t suggesting what Hyunjin thought he was suggesting?

"Well, if you want. I mean, we don't have to label it or anything, if you don’t want to…" Changbin said nonchalantly.

"It _has_ a label, Changbin. Though, I wouldn’t even give you the honour of being my _friends with benefits_ , seeing as we’re not even technically friends…" Hyunjin replied.

"I mean… We can’t deny there’s something between us, right? You get to stay here every once in a while, then we can just… I don’t know _, do this_ , in the morning?" He said, somewhat teasingly, but Hyunjin could tell he was being semi-serious when he spoke.

"You want me to sleep with you, then _lie in bed_ with you the next day...?" He said, raising a sarcastic eyebrow, as he arose to his feet again.

"Is that so bad? It doesn't _mean_ anything, to you, right?" Changbin asked, and Hyunjin couldn’t quite make out his expression; it was like he was trying to remain calm and composed, but beneath it there was some level of nervousness. It was almost endearing.

Hyunjin pondered for a moment.

He was surely only giving Changbin the time of day because he felt indebted to him. He’d be able to mess around with someone he was undeniably attracted to, he’d get bought expensive things on occasion, be able to fund the school’s stint at the Jeongdong scoring him big points with his boss… There wasn’t any obvious downside here, right?

So why did it feel like he was about to take a one-way trip to the finish line of his own sanity?

"...Right? Of course not." He stuttered, trying to act as self-assured as possible.

"So why does it matter if we cuddle a little, hmm? Or is that not ‘your style’?" Changbin said, raising his eyebrows at him and placing his phone down on the side. He slipped just a little further under the blankets, shuffling around to get comfortable. 

“ _Eurgh_ , ‘cuddle’, what the hell?” Hyunjin said, a disgusted look appearing across his face. “I mean… Do I get breakfast, like before?”

“I guess?”

“Hmm. Then, I’ll think about it. That breakfast in bed was pretty nice… And the shirt…”

“And being in the presence of such great company…?” Changbin added.

“Sure. Whatever you say.”

“Come back to bed for a bit longer, then.”

Hyunjin looked back at him; his facial expression was strangely soft and reassuring; probably due to the early morning weariness. The remark made him falter slightly, remembering the last time he’d heard that line, too many years ago.

He hesitated, before realising that he actually had no adequate excuse not to, and maybe a part of him had started to accept that he _did_ actually enjoy the physical contact that Changbin liked to make with him, on occasion.

“Fine. But I’ll be waiting for that breakfast in bed…” Hyunjin said, clambering back up towards him.

For a moment he contemplated crawling over top of him, straddling him, making him suffer a little, running his bare thighs across his hips, just to assert himself. But he was ultimately, a little too weary, and a little too sensitive in the morning to keep his regular charade up. So, he slipped in under the blanket, the sheet feeling smooth against his skin.

“I knew you couldn’t resist.” The older man said. He opened his left arm out wide, as Hyunjin slid his legs back in under the bedding, shaking his head at the gesture. He lifted Changbin’s wrist with his index finger and thumb, as if it were dirty, flinging it away from him with an offended look on his face, before settling in front of him. 

"Kiss me?"

"What?!" Hyunjin replied in revulsion.

"Well, if you _don't have any feelings for me_ , you won't care if we kissed, right?"

"You want me to _kiss you_ with that rancid-ass morning breath of yours? Give me a break.” He turned his back away from him in a huff, hearing Changbin softly chuckling at him from behind.

After a few minutes he felt Changbin’s arms attempt to sneak around him, his fingers caressing at the skin across his abdominals through his partially unbuttoned shirt, so he shuffled forward to secure a little more space in between them. 

“You know, you’re too short to be a big spoon, just saying.” He retorted, before closing his eyes.

With that, he curled up on his side in the luscious blankets and quilts, nodding back off.

He stirred slightly after around an hour had passed, waking up for just a moment to notice Changbin’s arms were wound tightly around his midriff, holding him securely against his chest, his nose buried in the skin at the back of his neck.

He didn’t try and stop it. 

The smell of rich sandalwood started drifting past him, travelling through with the slight breeze gliding through from the window. The fog making him feel light-headed, and sleepy again, feeling the vibrations of Changbin’s warm breath against him.

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

**PART TWO**

◕◕◕

“Dad. You know I’ve been trying to secure it, it’s a big deal, it’s going to take months for the final arrangements to be put—”

“—I don’t want to hear that kind of negativity in the board room, Changbin.”

“I’m not being negative I’m just saying—”

“—Well, _don’t_. We make deadlines for a reason, Changbin, if you can’t stick to them, then maybe you’re not suited to run this company.”

Changbin slumped his head down over the back of the chair he was standing behind around the conference table, looking exasperated around the other board members collectively sitting around the table.

“All of you, we’re done here. Dismissed.” Mr. Seo said, releasing the rest of the colleagues around him, filling the room with anxious murmurs and the sound of shuffling feet. They all trundled out awkwardly, some giving Changbin empathetic looks and the odd shoulder pat like they usually did when his Dad’s temperament had reached its peak.

“Dad, you say that every other week.” Changbin sighed, watching as the last few stragglers left, looking back to him as soon as the door closed. He rubbed his index finger and thumb across his browbone, trying to add enough pressure to stop a headache from coming on. 

“Well maybe if you were better at keeping to them, I wouldn’t. I’m a month away from leaving this business in your hands and you can’t even secure a deal with one of our biggest forums.” His Dad replied, hooking his fingers together, resting his chin loosely upon them.

“Well, we’re working on the MMCA exhibition, as our main priority—”

“—Well change priorities!” The man boomed, flying backwards in his chair, startling Changbin a little. “This conference is more important than some art show. We’ve been providing the Nova Seoul Centre tech for over _twenty years!”_

“Of course. Dad.” Changbin apologised, bowing to him.

“They’re an important business partner. You know that, don’t you?” He leant even further back, in his chair, a sardonic look on his face.

“Yes, Dad. I’ll… I’ll do what I can.”

“Good.” The man replied, giving one, firm, solid nod. “Plus, whilst no one’s here, and whilst we’re on the topic of partners. Sit down.”

Changbin looked taken aback, pulling at one of the chairs, dragging it out lethargically before slumping down on it, facing his Dad’s direction. He watched the older man straighten up his sleeves, and fiddle around with his cufflinks for a moment before he cleared his throat to speak.

“You emailed said you wanted a to take a plus one to my emeritus event? And _who_ exactly are you bringing, this time? Don’t tell me you’ve reconciled with _that one_ , again.” He scoffed, contemptuously.

“No, Dad. Minho and I are broken up for good, but we’re on decent terms now. We get on, these days, as friends.”

“Of course you ‘ _get on’_ , he’s rinsing you of nearly 2 million won a month, Changbin...”

“Dad, that’s not Minho’s money, that’s for the boys’ upkeep, we’ve been through this. Plus, Minho has a new partner, now.”

“Oh really?” The man said, pulling his reading glasses down and staring at him from across the room.

“Yeah, I’m serious.”

“Well, finally... Thank goodness, Changbin. You know how I felt about him.” The man said, a slight smile creeping across his face. “You know you were too good for him. Now you can find yourself… Someone else.” He leant forward, sliding his laptop across the table and flipping the lid open before tapping a few of the keys.

“Well, funny you should say that.” Changbin muttered anxiously, sliding his hands in to his pockets and looking around the room, trying to appear relaxed. “I actually do have someone that I want to invite to your retirement party.”

“It’s not a _retirement party_ , Changbin. It’s _a celebration of my life’s work_!” He said, clearly offended.

“That’s—that’s what I meant.”

His Dad peered up at him again, looking at him questioningly over his laptop screen. “Is it a woman, or a man?”

“Obviously, it’s a guy, Dad…” Changbin retorted, before stifling the _mother of all sighs._

“Right. Of course. I’m— Well, you know, I’m still getting used to that kind of thing.”

“Dad, I have two kids with a man, and I’m in my thirties now…” He groaned. Changbin rubbed his fingers against his temples, reminding himself to not push the man too far, his blood pressure was already teetering on aortic aneurysm-level. It’d taken fifteen years for the man to accept it _any kind of way_ , so he figured he should count his blessings. 

“Well, I’m being as open-minded as I can, Changbin, you know it takes me time. So, what’s his name?”

“Oh, it’s Hyunjin.” He stammered.

“How long have you been, _acquainted_? You haven’t mentioned anyone since _that one_.”

“I don’t know, a few months? Besides, when was the last time we had a conversation like this? It just, never really came up.” He responded, shrugging. 

“What line of work is he in?” The man suddenly blurted out.

“Why does that matter?”

“Come on, Changbin. I need to make sure you’re not making stupid decisions when you’re a month away from inheriting my life’s—

“— _Your life’s work_ , yeah, I get it.” Changbin said, rolling his eyes. “Anyway, he may not want to come anyway, it was, just a thought.”

In fact, it was more than just a ‘thought’, more like a pipedream.

“Are the boys, coming?” His Dad asked, resolutely.

“Of course, Dad, they wouldn’t miss it. They haven’t seen you in a long time.”

“Nonsense.” He said, wafting his hand around, “I saw Seungmin quite recently after he received that _Gifted Scholarly Award_. I had a video call with him not long ago, too. He’s really excelling, you should be proud of him.”

He arose from his chair, before leaning over the table to press his buzzer to summon his assistant in, muttering into the microphone about camomile, or something.

“I am. He’s going to be in a theatre production, soon, too. If you’d like to—”

“—Of course, you know I relish watching my grandson out-perform the other kids. He’s a true Seo, through and through.”

“And... Jeongin has been really improving at the piano, too.” He added, trying to rouse a comment of approval, or of some kind of interest in his other son.

“What grade?”

“I don’t… I don’t know.” He stammered, “I don’t think he’s taking grades.”

“What’s the point, then?” The man said dismissively, rolling his eyes. 

Changbin sighed himself into submission, contemplating if he wanted to verbalise what was inside of his head. Before anything else could be uttered, his Dad’s assistant came in through the room, a mug of steaming fruit tea in her hand, as she bowed in through the door.

Changbin took that as his excuse to leave, he didn’t really want to get into another argument with his Dad about Jeongin, it was way too late in the afternoon for that, now. He pushed back in his chair, patting himself down and wandering over to the coat stand next to the function room door, bowing at the assistant as he did. She smiled at him, before looking nervously back to his Dad.

Changbin really hated how unapproachable his Dad could be; he often enjoyed intimidating the other employees. It made him want to ensure that whenever his Dad wasn’t around, that he treated the workers with regard, he never wanted to be tarred with the same brush. He even joked around with them from time-to-time and made sure to see them outside of works as friends, rather than colleagues.

He loosened his tie a little and grabbed his blazer from the stand, swinging it over himself. The young woman placed the mug down and retrieved a file from her bag, turning to Changbin to mutter to him under her breath. 

“Mr. Seo, the rehearsal for the exhibition for the Museum of Modern and Contemporary Art went… Less than favourably. Disastrously, almost… We had some rig issues and some of the performers were commenting on the projection—” The flustered young woman whispered to him, handing him a printout, bowing at him again.

“—Why? What happened? Who’s leading?”

“Mr. Kang, sir.”

“Take him off, I’ll visit myself today. Everything needs to be streamlined and running smoothly. That exhibition is the biggest production package we’ve had in months...” Changbin groaned. She shot him an apologetic nod as she curled into herself, gripping the file closely to her chest.

He made his way out of the door, sighing that he had to visit _yet another_ set on his way home. His temples were throbbing, stress consuming his entire being. He snuck out to the parking lot, it was dark and some of the lights were flickering, dangerously close to triggering a migraine; he’d definitely booked an electrician to come and sort those out.

He slipped into his car, jolting back into the low-rise seat, rubbing his hands over his face. He sat there for a while, trying to regain his sanity by taking some timed, deep breaths.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, making him audibly grumble; _what else could anyone possibly want from him, today?_ He thought. 

* * *

_19:11_ **Hyunjin:**

hey soooooo

i just got promoted

like literally PROMOTED

and i fancy celebrating….. 🍷

so where are you taking me tonight?

_19:13_ **You:**

Wow, that’s awesome, congrats.

But I actually can’t tonight…

I have to visit one of the sites we have a contract with, it’s a total ball ache. x

 _19:15_ **Hyunjin:**

maybe you didn’t hear?

i said i got promoted????

at work?

and i need you to spoil me at some fancy bar or s/thing

 _19:16_ **You:**

I won’t really have any time

Plus, I’m really stressed out with all of this rn, and I definitely couldn’t face drinking tonight, I’m getting a headache.

 _19:17_ **Hyunjin:**

i meaaaaaan

this is /me/ we’re talking about

you get to see me? hello?

 _19:18_ **You:**

I really just can’t tonight

Sorry.

I’ll make it up to you, some other time.

Promise, whatever you want. x

 _19:20_ **Hyunjin:**

wooooow you’re terrible at being obsessed with me?

what kind of not quite-friends with benefits are you?

not good enough binnie

 _19:22_ **You:**

You know what?

You’re really starting to piss me off.

And you should know, it takes a lot.

 _19:23_ **Hyunjin:**

woooooooooah

the fuck?

 _19:25_ **You:**

Like I said, I’m just really fucking stressed at work and my Dad’s on my case and it’s just been really shitty here today.

I know you don’t really care about anyone but yourself, but can you at least pretend to for like five minutes?

* * *

He waited, and waited, for a response that clearly wasn’t coming through. He didn’t even know _why_ he was giving Hyunjin so many chances to _just_ _be a better fucking person_. He knew what he was like, why on earth would Hyunjin want to talk to him about his work? They weren’t in ‘that kind of relationship’.

They’d been sleeping together for weeks, and Changbin had set himself up to fall in way too deep by suggesting that he stayed over afterwards.

He'd concocted a plan in his head, a ‘ _three-step plan for getting Hyunjin to be his’_ :

Step one was simple, getting to know what Hyunjin liked; and boy did he... He’d spoiled Hyunjin so much in the last two months he was actually starting to burn a hole in his wallet. From restaurants, to clothes, to accessories. He was easy, in that regard.

The moment he figured that Hyunjin had some romantic feelings for him; it’d be time for step two. It’d pretty much been confirmed on that night in the taxi, but without spending any time together he was sure that their chemistry would fizzle out into nothing. So, step two was deciding to _throw away his own self-worth_ to have some dumb, non-official, relaxed _kind-of-not_ relationship with him, instead, just like he’d done with Minho… For over two years.

He was holding out hope that he and Hyunjin would spend enough time together that he might realise his feelings, though there really hadn’t been any signs of that happening, yet, and three weeks had passed. So, step three, which was _‘Hyunjin falls madly in love with Changbin’_ hadn’t quite been achieved, yet. He felt more foolish as the days went by.

So here he was, yet again, pining over another egotistical, sarcastic-as-fuck, pretty boy that treated him like shit. Nothing new. He thought he would have learnt by now that it only caused him misery in the long run, but he couldn’t help it.

Suddenly, another text came through

* * *

 _19:23_ **Hyunjin:**

fine. 

but i’m coming over after, anyway.

◕◕◕

“Does it piss you off, when you don’t get constant attention, or something?” Changbin said dryly, swinging the door open to find Hyunjin standing outside his front door in his porch. He immediately came through the entrance without being invited in, wandering into his hallway. He slung his shoes off, tossing them across into the cloakroom space off to the side of the door.

He was dressed in a white blouse with sheer arms, and pin-stripe grey pants, his hair lazily pushed back into a loose ponytail. He had barely any makeup on today, but he still looked good, beautifully chiselled like some Greek God; like Apollo incarnate. Changbin could barely believe this is how good Hyunjin looked after a full day of work.

Changbin on the other hand had started at 5:00am this morning, and only just got back from his site visit, and it was nearing 9:30pm. His slightly sweaty, mildly creased, white work shirt wasn’t really doing him any favors and he winced at the idea that he and Hyunjin would do anything of a _sexual nature_ tonight considering the state he was in.

“I literally got promoted to Head of the Arts Department and Jisung and Minho are busy, and Chan’s gone back home to visit his family like twelve hours away or something, so I need someone to celebrate with…” He sighed, clambering through the house nonchalantly like he fucking owned the place.

He swung through into the living room, sliding across the black marble flooring in his white socks before throwing himself down, stomach downward facing on the couch in the middle of the room, kicking his legs backwards and forwards. Changbin simply followed him through, totally used to how frustratingly relaxed he’d become here, over the last three weeks.

“So, what you’re saying is, you don’t have any other friends you could get drunk with?”

“Meh, everyone I usually go out with is busy. Plus, I can’t be bothered to go _out, out_ tonight. Everyone else just annoys me.” He said, flittering his hand to highlight just _how unbothered_ he was by the entire thing.

Though, Changbin knew what he was like by this point, and he knew Hyunjin actually only had a few friends that he actively hung out with, anyway.

“Apart from me, clearly?” He said cockily, making his way across the room to rest his palms on the back of the couch, leaning over where Hyunjin was sitting.

“Well, whatever. I just remember you have that expensive bottle of Miyagi Sake that you got from that trip to Honshu, in your alcohol cabinet up there.” He said, twisting his body to lay on his back, pointing at one of the cabinets across in his kitchen area, a demonic little look on his face.

“That was a gift, you’re not drinking that…” Changbin said, strangely firmly considering how he usually gave in to Hyunjin as soon as their eyes locked for more than two nanoseconds. He saw Hyunjin’s expression falter, his brows dropping like he was about to _sulk._

“Sheesh, you really are boring today…” Hyunjin groaned, slumping all of his limbs across the leather. “What happened…?”

“Nothing it’s just… My Dad is going on at me about this business partner we have and I’m trying to get things together for this exhibition, and there’s my Dad’s retirement—

“Exhibition?” Hyunjin said, perking his head up.

“Yeah, every year there’s this live art ceremony and it’s kind of a big deal, it’s at some art museum or something.”

“Wait, you’re not talking about _The Expression Live Art Show_?” Hyunjin said, suddenly profoundly interested. “That’s a _super big deal_ in the world of art, you know that?!”

“Yeah, which is why I’m trying my best with it but Dad’s being, difficult.”

“Oh my God, I’ve always wanted to go. That’s, huge, and super exclusive.” Hyunjin said, his eyes wide and sparkling like a kids’ at Christmas.

“Well, that’s what I said, but my Dad—”

“—Your Dad is dumb; your idea is _so_ much better...” Hyunjin replied playfully, placing both of his hands flat across his stomach, ‘accidentally’ lifting his shirt up to expose his stomach just a little bit.

“You’re just flattering me because you want my expensive bottle of sake…” Changbin said, totally exasperated. Hyunjin grabbed his slackened tie, pulling their faces just inches apart as Changbin leaned over him across the back of the couch.

“You got me.” He teased, biting at his lower lip.

It was annoyingly provocative, having Hyunjin laying there on his back, hair pushed back, just _there for the taking_ in front of him. He really did know how to push his buttons in every conceivable way imaginable.

He leant in, connecting their lips for a while, pulling at his neck to deepen their kiss through the strange angle they’d created for themselves with their couch set-up. He decided to pull back momentarily, making his way directly around it to face him straight on. The ferocity he’d been feeling all day suddenly turned in to the intense, feral desire to have Hyunjin _in his hands._

He launched himself across, straddling his thighs and re-attached their lips together at a more ‘practical’ angle this time. He lapped at Hyunjin like his life depended on it; their lips moving together rhythmically over and over as the younger man’s tongue explored his mouth.

He used his weight to press down at either side of Hyunjin’s wrists, pinning him underneath him. It had taken three weeks or so for Changbin to realise that Hyunjin liked this change of pace, all the times before he’d tried to regain control over him, but his façade was slipping away like the subtle moans slipping out of his mouth. 

The kiss became slow and sensual, like it always did with them, and Changbin became so consumed in kissing the beautiful man beneath him that he forgot about the real reason Hyunjin was actually here, once again. He’d caught himself plummeting under, lost in his desire for Hyunjin’s approval. He leaned back, caressing the younger man’s face, and dragging his thumb across the left-hand side of his lip.

“I’m going to shower, then we can drink it, after.”

“Just… Don’t be long, please.” Hyunjin replied shakily. His eyes were closed, and he was still breathless from their kiss.

The sudden genuine _longing_ that coated Hyunjin’s words stunned him for a moment; the cracks were starting to show.

He really wasn't fooling anyone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooof, a little time skip and some Changbin POV! hopefully the change of pace wasn't too jarring!
> 
> i rather enjoy how much less entitled hyunjin is when he's on his own, face-to-face with changbin 🙃
> 
> <3 https://twitter.com/YfwbbS


	9. And Therefore Is Winged Cupid Painted Blind

◕◕◕

Changbin woke a little before his alarm, sitting up slowly as not to wake the sleeping man beside him. For some reason, it felt like lying next to Hyunjin made him rest easy; it felt reassuring to have someone there, though he didn’t know if that was scientifically even a thing. He couldn’t stop himself from reaching across, to latch on to Hyunjin’s fingers as he slept. Even though he was soundly sleeping, his fingers curled up around him, almost instinctively. He looked so peaceful, breathing steadily, his bare chest rising and falling.

His phone vibrated next to him, shunting him out of his little daydream. It was Minho.

* * *

_09:22_ **Minho** :

Seungmin asked if you’re still collecting him from rehearsal after school on Friday? I know I usually pick them up and you get them from mine but he’s staying after school for it.

 _09:23_ **You**

Yeah that’s totally fine, I finish work at 6:00pm so I’ll be able to get him at a decent time.

Thanks for being good about changing dates and stuff recently, I know you don’t like it. Dad’s been really on me about his retirement, so he’s got me working so much.

 _09:25_ **Minho** :

No worries, it happens, I know what your Dad is like. Do you want me to put Jeongin in afterschool club so you can get them both at the same time from school, or do you want to pick him up from mine after?

 _09:26_ **You**

After School Club, if you wouldn’t mind.

Hyunjin said we can watch a bit of the performance if we want to hang around the auditorium. Seung likes an audience!

 _09:28_ **Minho** :

Hyunjin said?

You two are still speaking?

 _09:29_ **You**

Yeah? Why wouldn’t we be?

 _09:30_ **Minho** :

Well, Hyunjin said there was nothing going on between you, is all.

I saw him after /that night/ out and he said it was all a misunderstanding.

I didn’t know you were still in contact?

 _09:32_ **You**

Well, we are.

Is that a problem?

 _09:33_ **Minho** :

Not at all, Changbin, I was just curious. 🙄

Why on Earth would that be a problem?

* * *

“Who’re you talking to, hmm?” Hyunjin mumbled under his breath, eyes still closed. He slowly flipped over to his other side to lay on his right, with his nose lightly pressed against Changbin’s arm. 

“Just Minho.” Changbin said with an exhale, dumping his phone on the bed in between his feet before stretching his arms above his head.

“My, my. You sure do talk to Minho a lot, huh? I thought you didn’t think about him anymore?” Hyunjin teased, a small smile appearing at one side of his mouth as he nestled in closer.

“We’re talking about the boys, Hyunjin. You know, the two kids we have together?... Try not to be so jealous.” Changbin teased back, poking at his side.

“Jealous… Please.” He said, adding a ‘ _tsssh’_ to the end of the sentence to accentuate his little _dramatic eye roll_ before he turned back over as what Changbin took as, an invitation to spoon. Before he could wrap himself around the younger man, he heard the sound of the front door buzzer vibrating. It would be his Saturday workers, his housekeeper and Chef, at the door.

He lifted himself out of bed to welcome the staff in, stretching his neck from side-to-side as he did. He waded across to the mirrored closet and pulled out his black robe, slipping it over himself and tying it tightly around his waist. He’d managed to actually get into sweatpants and a t-shirt last night, which was more than could be said for Hyunjin, who was sprawled across his bed in just his boxers, soaking up the morning sun filtering in through the slats in his blinds, shining stripes across his chest as he lay.

“I’m going to let the staff in, make sure you’re decent when you come through for breakfast.” He said, making his way across the room, sliding his feet into his slippers.

“Come through?” Hyunjin said, rolling back around and propping himself up on his elbows. “You’re not going to bring it to me? But I’m so comfortable…” He whined, throwing himself back down and twisting himself up in the comforter.

“I can see that.” He said dryly, raising one eyebrow. He wandered out of the door, the feeling of the heated marble beneath him warming his feet a little as he wandered down the hall.

“Fine!” He heard Hyunjin shout after him, before he heard the _creak_ of his closet being cracked open. He considered that Hyunjin borrowing _one more_ designer shirt was probably a decent enough trade-off for the significant progress he thought they’d made last night.

Beforehand, he was starting to lose hope in his plan, but if last night was anything to go by, there were definitely some residual feelings there. Hyunjin hadn’t stopped kissing him and holding him all night; it was different to before, where he’d try and avoid kissing altogether, probably in fear that it would become too ‘romantic’ between them.

He could kiss Hyunjin for hours, days, nights, and never get tired of it.

There was always the tickly, nagging feeling in the back of his mind that told him Hyunjin actually _was_ just a superficial, materialistic, flirt who really was just using him for a warm bed once-a-week and some expensive jewellery, but whenever he looked at him, he knew there was something there. Something deep within the younger man that he couldn’t quite grasp, but he couldn’t let go of, either.

He was sure it wouldn’t be long before Hyunjin would realise it, too.

Changbin felt a proud little smirk appearing on his face as he made his way to the door, a slight spring in his step. He let his Chef and housekeeper in, beaming at the two men more than normal as he was just in that kind of mood, today. They wandered in, his housekeeper heading upstairs and the Chef immediately heading into the kitchen to prepare.

Breakfast today was sweeter than he’d normally have – American style breads, European viennoiseries and various fruit jams, as well as some thick pancakes loaded with honey and cream. It was a nice change, and he was sure Hyunjin would be the kind of person to have a sweet tooth; he seemed the type.

He sat waiting at the table for his Chef to serve up, scrolling through the notifications on his phone and briefly skimming over the twenty emails he’d gotten _just since yesterday_ about IT Service failures and problems that had arisen in their projects.

Suddenly, Hyunjin waded out, totally unashamedly, just wearing his favorite black _Balenciaga_ hoodie that usually draped down over the entirety of Changbin’s thigh to his knees. On Hyunjin, however, it just barely reached to the _top_ of his thigh, short enough to see the material of the leg of his underwear.

He smiled across at the Chef, his eyes disappearing into his cheesy, exaggerated, little smile as he flittered ‘ _Good morning_!’ politely to him, the Chef immediately noticing his get-up and pulling his eyes back to his batter mix.

“Hyunjin… I said _decent…”_ Changbin sighed.

“I always look decent?” He said innocently, taking a bowl in his hands, and loading it with a few of the pancakes that were already served. “I look more than decent, in this.”

He topped them with two hearty dollops of cream and a generous squirt of honey from the squeeze bottle. Then he glanced upwards, his head slightly lowered with a wicked look on his face. He decided to seductively scoop his finger overtop of the cream to gather a small amount, and proceed to stick his finger in to his mouth, lapping it straight off, whilst never _once_ dropping eye contact with him from across the table... Of course.

Changbin exhaled deeply, almost stifling a laugh, rubbing the pads of his fingers across his eyes and sitting back in his seat. He couldn’t help but find it humorous; the way Hyunjin acted when there was _literally anyone else_ in the room was worlds apart from the way they acted when they were on their own together. He was so outrageous it was almost unbearable.

He clocked his Chef, who’d seen the entire exchange and was currently sporting a blush that was so deeply intense he looked like he was about to faint on the spot in embarrassment. He bowed out, holding his hands together in a little prayer motion before slipping out of the door without uttering a word.

Changbin rather thought someone _should_ pray for him, because the man in front of him was annihilating him from the inside, out.

“I meant _decent_ as in morally respectable and not committing a public indecency offence in front of my staff…” Changbin sighed, putting the white, porcelain lid back on top of the cream pot to cover it.

“My bad...” He said, smiling brightly. “Wow, this is so much food, I’m going to be full for like three days.”

“Well, I’m going out with some of the work guys tonight for drinks, so I should probably make sure I should eat a lot beforehand.” He said, shovelling some soggy pancake into his mouth, taking a moment to appreciate its sickly-sweet flavor.

“Oh, right. Fair enough, I guess. What’s the occasion?” Hyunjin asked from across the table, suddenly interested.

“Oh, no reason. Just a few friends going for a drink.”

“Right.” He said, nodding.

It went a little tense for a moment, neither of them really knowing what to say. Whenever their conversation wasn’t filled with copious amounts of seduction and flirting, Changbin realised that he was a lot quieter. It was easier to talk when they were in bed, rather than over a breakfast table.

“Do you… Want to come, or something? As a plus one?” Changbin asked, cutting the silence.

“Oh, no, not at all. That’s not really my thing.”

“What, drinking with a bunch of guys isn’t ‘ _your thing’_? That’s literally the definition of ‘ _your thing’_?” Changbin said laughing dubiously. “I mean, some of my guy friends are single, you know… They’re all Senior positions in my company, so most of them are pretty well-off.” He took another bite of his breakfast, looking up at Hyunjin as he did.

Hyunjin suddenly looked back up to him too, a little startled at the suggestion, perhaps, Changbin thought. He was teasing, seeing how badly Hyunjin would take the bait; he expected him to play along, flirt with his friends in front of him, ultimately driving him back in to Changbin’s arms. The game was exhilarating in some ways, and he could tell that Hyunjin felt a little welcomely uncomfortable about the insinuation.

Hyunjin placed his fork down beside his plate, locking his fingers together and resting his chin across them, leaning his head to the right.

“Is all you think of me that I want to hook up with rich guys all the time?” Hyunjin scoffed, still keeping the conversation fairly light, but the sudden front made Changbin falter; he could hear the uncertainty coating Hyunjin’s words.

“Well, I mean, that’s what you’ve always implied, right? Or, if none of my friends are to your liking, you could always come back here with me, again, tonight?”

“Two nights in a row?” Hyunjin asked, looking back down to his plate. He picked up his fork again, digging around at the batter, swirling it around in the sticky sauce coating the bottom of the bowl. 

“Sure. Why not?”

“Well, I don’t know? It just seems a bit strange, to me. Isn’t it weird to take your ‘ _friends with benefits_ ’ to meet your friends? Seems a bit…” He shoved pancake back into his mouth, to stop him from finishing his sentence. 

“Don’t come, then, I guess. I’m not forcing you or anything.” Changbin retorted, shrugging, looking back to the breakfast bowl, slightly unsure of how that exchange had strayed so uncharacteristically afar from what he was expecting. “Work’s just taking up so much of my time. That’s why I need to get out, have a few drinks and just let loose a little…”

“How many of your, friends, will be there?” Hyunjin questioned, looking back up at him with a slightly cocked eyebrow.

“Probably, ten or so?”

“—Apologies to interrupt you and your partner, Mr. Seo, but your Father was just on the main line. He asked you to call him on his mobile.” The housekeeper said, popping his head through the door.

Usually he would come through entirely, but either Hyunjin’s get up was a little startling or the Chef had given him the unfortunate heads up about the questionable things had happened earlier...

“Sure, thank you, Hajun.” He said, nodding at him.

“Sorry to say, but it sounded… Not particularly pleasant?” The wrinkled man said, wincing slightly at the connotation before turning back out of the door.

“It never is… I’ll call him now, thanks.” Changbin huffed, pulling himself up from his chair and dropping his fork in to his bowl with a clatter. “I should probably get you home, Hyunjin. I’m gonna go to the office, I can drop you home on the way?”

“I’m probably just gonna… Just take a cab.” Hyunjin said, his head lulling.

“I really don’t mind dropping you back at your apartment, Hyunjin. You can shower too if you want.”

“No, it’s… It’s fine. I’ll make my own way home.” 

“Well, alright, just let me know if you want to come out tonight? You know there’s always space for you here. Door’s always open if you get bored on your own or you need someone to cuddle up to...” Changbin teased. 

Hyunjin looked up at him again, expressionless.

“I’ll… I’ll think about it.”

◕◕◕

The next time Changbin saw Hyunjin in a _formal setting_ , it was picking up Seungmin after a rehearsal; it had been a week.

He’d texted Hyunjin that evening after he got home from breakfast, to see if he did want to come out with his friends for a drink, but his immediate response was that he ‘already had plans’; a date with a guy he’d met a month or so before… The moment he received the text, he was sure his soul left his body.

Hyunjin was emotionally and psychologically draining. It felt like every time something positive happened between them, something exponentially worse would happen, taking him back to square one.

At least it was a Friday night, and Seungmin and Jeongin were going to be with him all weekend, so at least he was distracted somewhat, but a really selfish part of him did really wish it was _next_ weekend already, so he could see him again. That was, if Hyunjin even _wanted_ to see him anymore. 

He’d picked up Jeongin from After School Club and taken the short walk from the boys’ school to the high school, parking up on the side of the road. He wandered through reception, Jeongin’s hand in his, tottering along behind him, dragging his shoes across the slippery, polished floor of the entrance hall.

They walked across to the auditorium door, which had a glass panel either side. He pulled it to, listening in, watching over the rehearsal. Jeongin stood in awe, his eyes darting all over the colossal room and the colorful, brightly-illuminated stage.

There were around five or six of the middle schoolers, including Seungmin at the back of the stage, holding their scripts, with two of the high schoolers positioned at the front and one girl standing at the back. He wasn’t really familiar with the play, so he had no idea what they were actually rehearsing.

He glanced around the room, covering his brow with his hand due to the intense stage lighting, his eyes searching for something, or someone, in particular.

There he was.

Hyunjin was sitting at the front in a light blue collared shirt, at the desk with the projector, leaning back in the chair with his arm lethargically wrapped around the empty one next to him. He saw the man drop his head back for a moment and run his hands through his hair.

“Guys, I want only the creatures stage left, all other main case entering stage _right_ apart from Titania… Go again, please.” Hyunjin spoke into the mic, echoing it throughout the room. The sound of his voice sent shivers down Changbin’s spine. He sounded exhausted, with so little energy in his voice, like they’d been practising that same scene for hours.

They ran through the scene again and again, Changbin’s eyes proudly focused on Seungmin at the back, who was doing his best to keep up with the older kids, not even looking nervous at all. His Dad was right, Seungmin really was excelling, more than normal.

Once he was happy with the quality, Hyunjin suddenly arose to his feet, clapping his hands over his head twice.

“Okay, that’s a wrap. We’re going to work on Act 4, Scene 1 next week. Let’s start finishing up here before the parents arrive!” He called out.

The kids all started excitedly shuffling around, clearly enthralled at the idea of finally getting to head home after a long day. A few of the teenagers thanked him, some of the schoolgirls clearly had a little teacher crush on him, too, giggling whenever they were around him.

They waved goodbye to him before heading out of the door, so Changbin scooted to the side to let the gaggle out, deliberately lingering within sight. He greeted Seungmin with wide arms, which he unsurprisingly, rejected… He really was nine, going on fifteen.

“Well done, Seungmin! It looks fun up there.” Jeongin said, giving him a little high five. “The lights are so cool!”

“Thanks, Jeongin. Yeah, when the potion goes into Lysander’s eyes, the lights are going to flash all purple and blue! It’s really _professional_.” Seungmin bragged, nodding with his hand held proudly against his chest. He scurried over to the side to grab his satchel and his lunchbag, skidding across the floor in his little Converse trainers.

Hyunjin walked across to the other side of the auditorium, to shut off some of the flood lights from the panel at the back of the room, barely even noticing them, until Seungmin called out to him.

“Goodbye, Mr. Hwang! I’ll see you next week!” He said, waving his arm over the top of his head. Jeongin waved too; he’d met Hyunjin a few times at Minho’s, and it was probably the most interaction anyone was going to get with his little Jeongin anyway. He wasn’t particularly super affectionate with anyone other than him and Minho, at the best of times.

“Thanks, Seungmin. See you next week.” He responded, categorically, with a little bow.

It was only when he finally turned to face them, that Changbin saw what kind of condition he was in. He had bags under his eyes, and his hair was loose and slightly frizzy looking compared to normal. His shirt was also unbuttoned to the second clasp, and it looked like it hadn’t been ironed. It definitely was a change up to what Changbin was used to him looking like; not that he could ever look _bad_ compared to most human beings.

He looked so drained and Changbin wondered why. All he could think about was how much he wanted to make it better. It was weird for Hyunjin not to text him and complain about how exhausted he was, or what annoying thing had happened at school that week; not knowing what had him feeling like this, felt _wrong_ somehow.

“Seung, Jeong, wait in the foyer with the receptionist, okay, I’ll just be a moment.” He said, scooting them out, Seungmin raising a dubious eyebrow at him as he looked towards his teacher.

He made his way across down the centre walkway towards him, just the sound of his steel bottomed loafers tapping across the wooden floor. As he got closer, he could hear Hyunjin _sigh_ before he’d even gotten that close to him...

“Yes, Changbin?” He said, his back facing him as he gathered his final things together in his brown, leather bag. “Is there something you need?”

“Hyunjin, look. Is everything… Okay?” He said, surprised by how formal Hyunjin was being with him after weeks of banter, even in a work setting. He tried to hush his voice, leaning his shoulder in towards him.

“What do you mean?” Hyunjin said, turning back to face him with his scripts arranged in his hands.

“Well, I mean, I just haven’t heard from you, all week?”

“We have three more rehearsals until dress rehearsal at the theater, Changbin. I’ve been kind of busy.” He made his way back down another set of seats, taking all the other scripts that had been left scattered across them, adding them to the pile stacked up in his arms. Changbin immediately started collecting the other scripts strewn around along another row of chairs, trying to help him pack away.

“Well, I invited you out, and then you said you had _a date_. You didn’t say anything about a date when I originally asked…”

“It was, kind of a last-minute arrangement.”

“So, I invited you out first, and you said no, only to make plans with someone else?” He walked to the end of his row and abruptly stopped in front of Hyunjin’s path, causing them to nearly collide. He noticed Hyunjin was struggling to make any kind of eye contact, playing it off as just being too busy to entertain his company.

“Sorry? Changbin, I don’t know your friends, why would I want to go out drinking with them?” He said, exasperated.

“You’re scared.”

Changbin suddenly dropped the pile of scripts he had to the floor. The paperback bundles flapping in mid-air for a moment and then landing with a _thud_ that forced Hyunjin to turn back and look at him.

“I’m— I’m what?”

“You’re scared that you’re going to get as bad as you were before, when you told me that you’d not stopped thinking about me.”

“That’s ridiculous Changbin, I just don’t usually hang around people I don’t know, that’s all.”

“You sleep with strangers on the regular and you suddenly ‘don’t hang around people you don’t know’?” Changbin hissed under his breath. He felt the adrenaline bubbling up inside of him, and a pressure behind his eyes. “Can you cut the crap, for like, two minutes?” 

“Changbin… If you must know…. Look, we’re not _exclusive_. You do know that?” He dropped his own pile down back on the desk, before pushing his bangs back out of his eyes. “I thought that was the deal between us. When I’m with you. It’s too… Familiar, I guess. I don’t think we should be doing what we’re doing. Your housekeeper, he called me your partner…”

“He did? I didn’t even notic—”

“No, you didn’t. That’s the problem...” He said, looking confused, shaking his head from side-to-side. “Maybe… You need to find someone who _can give you that_ , or whatever, because I—I can’t... I haven’t been like that with anyone in a long time. Anyway, I’m sure all of your friends are boring, intelligent, techy types and I’m—”

“Come to that art show, with me, next weekend.” Changbin spluttered out. “That’s not dull or technical or whatever.”

A small, internal voice of reason told him to _have some pride, Changbin, don’t do this again_.

But he was _so_ desperate not to let it end here, not to let it burn out. He could literally feel his heart thumping out of his chest, his palms sweating profusely with his fingernails digging into them with how tightly clasped his fists were. He’d worked so hard and fallen so deep that he couldn’t possibly let it all go, now.

“What?” Hyunjin said, blinking at him, looking totally perplexed.

“That art show, the one we’re doing the production for. The ‘ _Expression’_ one? You said you’ve always wanted to go? Come with me; I can get tickets.” He reasoned.

“Changbin… Those tickets cost so much, plus I don’t think it’s a good ide—.”

“—Not for me? I’m working on the exhibition. I want to take you.”

“Why would you want to to do that...?” He asked, his face screwed up in confusion.

“Because. You love that kind of stuff, right? And it looks like you need it.”

“Well, few of my favorite contemporary artists are there, this year…”

“Then come with me.”

“You don’t have… You don’t have to do that, Changbin. There’ll be lots of famous people there and I’ll… I’ll stick out, I guess. I don’t know.” He sighed. When he spoke, it was a little more openly than Changbin expected, he’d never heard Hyunjin lacking confidence about fitting in, anywhere, ever. He assumed it was down to how extraordinarily weary he looked.

“After that, then you can make your mind up if you want to see me anymore.” He said, resolutely.

They stared at each other before Hyunjin rubbed his eyes in exhaustion, and Changbin was all too aware of how frantic and desperate he looked. Changbin reached for his hand, gripping his fingers in between his palm. Hyunjin glanced down to watch the exchange, blinking slowly.

Hyunjin lightly squeezed his hand back at first; his fingers curled up around him, almost instinctively, before he realised what he was doing, abruptly letting go and turning back around to place his hands over the edge of the desk, leaning over it in total despondency.

“ _Why_ … Why do you keep trying so hard…? You’re so…” Hyunjin said shakily, under his breath.

“Just tell me to leave, then.”

“What?” He said, turning back around.

“If you don’t want to see me anymore, just tell me that, and I’ll go.”

“I—” He opened his mouth to speak, a small sigh escaping before he dropped his head back down again, his eyes flitting around the room. “I can’t…”

“ _That’s_ why I’m trying so hard, Hyunjin.” He sighed, slipping his hands in to his pockets. He waltzed back up down the aisle, noticing Jeongin and Seungmin peeking through the window, blinking in confusion as to what on Earth was happening. They ducked away, thinking that Changbin hadn’t seen them, but he definitely had.

“I’m going to spend some time with my boys, message me when you get home, so I know you’re okay.” He said, turning back to him one last time before slipping out of the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, i kind of hate this chapter but hey ho
> 
> i kinda asked people if they wanted changjin to fall together kinda 'organically' over time or if they wanted something 'eventful' to happen. looks like people would like something to spur them on so we're getting eventful!!!! WE LOVE THE DRAMA and honestly angst is second nature to me so..... next chap is the art exhibition and it's my favourite chapter that i've written so far in terms of changjin's development, so please look forward to it! <3
> 
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3
> 
> thank you for reading <3


	10. To Gild Refined Gold, To Paint The Lily...

◕◕◕

“Are you sure about this?” Hyunjin said, smoothing down the collar of his oversized, grey suit jacket, watching himself in the mirror.

“Of course.” Changbin replied, totally exasperated, barely even looking in his direction. “I mean. I think you can kind of pull off anything so...?”

“Changbin, it’s an art exhibition. There’s going to be hundreds of sought-after artists and performers there, I need to look… Ooh, this black one is _Dolce and Gabbana._ ” He said, lifting the black three-piece suit off of the rack by the hanger, twirling it around in the plastic casing and lining it up against his front. He looked at it, not totally happy with that one, either, it seemed. 

“Well, whatever you want. I like the _Armani_ , the grey one, though.” Changbin said, watching him from the leather waiting chair whilst scrolling through his notifications.

“You really shouldn’t spend all this money on me.” Hyunjin said, scanning over the 442,00,00₩ tag in his fingers, and grimacing.

“It’s just a rental Hyunjin, it’s like half a mil, tops.”

He watched Hyunjin totally fail to mask his eyes rolling back into his skull, before turning back to face the mirror, fiddling with the black tie around his neck. He'd picked a white shirt that instead of a regular collar, had a slight ruffle, the arms having longer sleeves than normal. Once the tie was lazily tightened, he looked himself up and down, not totally content. He wandered across to the rack with the other ties, neatly presented hanging over the rack. He scanned his fingers over each of them, before sighing.

“It’s just a tie, it doesn’t have to be perf—"

“ _That_ … That’s perfect.” He suddenly said.

He pointed across to one of the mannequins; a small one, dressed in a flowy, lilac bridesmaid dress. He swiftly manoeuvred around the stack of shoe boxes he’d set out, wandering across, hands immediately latching on to a pinkish rose attached to the mannequin’s wrist. It was a corsage, a dainty, pastel color with black ribbons wrapped around the arm.

“A flower?”

“See the black ribbon? I’ll tie it around my neck, instead of a tie. I really can't wear a regular tie with this shirt.” He said, suddenly re-invigorated by his new idea.

“That’s… Different?”

“Well... Do you think it’s too much?”

“Since when have you ever worried about being ‘too much’?” Changbin scoffed.

“Well, since I might run in to some of my favourite artists in the most prestigious and renowned event in the arts calendar?!”

Changbin sighed, watching Hyunjin frantically run around the room trying to make himself look as presentable as possible. He peered across at the clock, mumbling to himself.

“We need to get going, soon, Hyunjin...”

“Yes! I know, I just need to…! I need to do my hair and my face and I’m not sure if th— He trailed off, running in to another changing room.

Hyunjin had agreed to meet him here, still abundantly secretive as usual whenever Changbin offered to collect him from his apartment. He was also concerned that he didn’t have any clothes that were ‘extravagant enough’ to attend the exhibition. So, Changbin had obviously offered to help him choose something. Little did he know he’d still be at the store, already sitting in his own suit, impatiently waiting, four hours later.

He finally appeared out of the curtain, settled on the grey, oversized suit with the black ribbon detail intricately dangling from his neck, the rose centred as a killing piece. It should’ve looked strange, and it probably would’ve looked strange on anyone else, but _him._

“Wow. You look, really incredible.” Changbin said, a little taken aback.

Changbin’s eyes trailed up and down him. For a moment he wondered how on Earth he’d managed to find someone so otherworldly, what he’d done in a past life to warrant someone so ethereally beautiful to be standing on front of him. It was madness, and it made him light-headed.

“I think I’ll keep my hair down, I don't think I have time to style it.” The taller man responded, slightly panicked, turning back to face the mirror.

Some time passed, allowing Hyunjin to ‘fix his face’, which didn’t actually need fixing at all, and Changbin had booked them a black Benz and a chauffeur for the event. It was a little excessive, but Hyunjin was right; the event really was pretty huge.

The little flatscreen TV in the corner of the dressing room was already airing some of the entrances of some famous faces that were already arriving that Hyunjin was pointing at and naming one by one; _Xooang Choi_ , _Je Baak_ , and other western artists that he couldn’t begin to remember, too...

As they wandered outside, it was lightly raining, and Changbin held his umbrella over top of the younger man as he made his way across the street and entered the cab, which probably looked ridiculous considering their height difference, but he thought it was a nice gesture, nonetheless.

They spent most of the ride in a comfortably awkward silence, considering the last time Hyunjin was in a cab with him, he’d revealed a little more than he’d expected to. He could tell Hyunjin was on edge, probably a little nervous to be face-to-face with people he admired.

Changbin reached across, to hold his hand, like before. Hyunjin lightly squeezed his hand back at first; his fingers curled up around him, almost instinctively, before he realised what he was doing.

He loosened them, a little melancholic expression on his face. He shuffled a little bit closer towards the window, glancing out of it. He’d been fairly non-affectionate during getting ready, not even complimenting him back when Changbin had told him how gorgeous he looked.

It stung, more than he’d like to admit considering he wasn’t particularly chauvinistic when it came to his looks, but more, it hurt that Hyunjin was conscientiously _trying_ to be a little standoffish with him.

That, or his nerves really were getting the better of him.

◕◕◕

There were photographers at the entrance, and various weirdly-dressed, tweed-clad guys were posing for photos with some models that were a hell of a lot taller than he was. They wandered through the entrance after the main gaggle of famous faces and artists had opened the ceremony, walking through a revolving silver door into a vast white hallway with the rest of the public that were elusive enough to be here. The floor was a laminated, rich, mahogany, and the walls all had a glossy white finish, so bright it made his eyes ache; the entire place feeling overwhelming.

“This place is incredible. Last time I came to the Museum of Modern and Contemporary Art was like… Before I graduated. I can’t believe some of the artists they’ve managed to book tonight!” Hyunjin squealed, excitement bubbling over in his tone, the nerves being replaced with sheer anticipation.

They walked slowly through the exhibit, alongside with the crowd of other suit-donning clientele, stopping at different shows in different areas of the galleries. All of the pieces had some kind of 'live' element; music, or speech, or singing or acting.

Hyunjin stopped at one for a long time; two circles of realistic human hands curled up into two balls, swinging from the ceiling. He wandered around it, examining it from each side, lost in his own little world. Changbin had literally no idea what the heck was going on, but he noticed his company’s light projection on one of the other exhibits, so decided to move on across to that whilst Hyunjin was so absorbed.

The project was a total success; the projection panning through some kind of colorful hieroglyphs or something whilst the artists, or actors, or whatever, performed a series of weird, prayer-like movements. There was audio too, perfectly sliced together and crisp.

He saw Hyunjin scanning around the room, his head bobbing up and down, probably looking for him, he thought, or hoped. He started heading back over and Changbin pretended to have a clue what was going on, nodding along, and clapping when other people did. Even going so far as to mutter ‘ _wow…_ ’ under his breath as soon as he was in earshot.

“Wow, is right. What do you think of this one?” Hyunjin said quietly, trying not to talk over the performance. He scanned over the artist’s description on the stone support next to them.

“It’s… I mean, it’s… Something.” Changbin murmured, shrugging.

Hyunjin laughed at him, patting him playfully against the chest.

“Wow, all that money and no imagination.” Hyunjin scoffed.

“Alright, Mr. Teacher, what do you think then? What’s your _analysis?_ ”

“I think, it’s like a social commentary, it’s obviously obscurantism but underneath you can see there’s some themes of theological allegiance and indoctrination. You know?”

“Yeah… Totally. That was, my next answer…” He said, totally perplexed, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s written on the description...” Hyunjin teased, shooting him a little smirk before waltzing off to the next display piece.

He watched the way Hyunjin finessed the room, he looked like he really fit in here, gliding around the room with a smile that was so vivid, Changbin was sure he’d never seen it so bright since they met. He’d even stopped to get an autograph from one of the artists, clutching it to his chest with his shaken hands.

“Please can we go through and see this one?!” Hyunjin asked, pointing at the brochure he’d been carrying along with him. “I’m dying to see it, honestly.”

“Of course, this is for you, after all.” Changbin retorted, smiling at him. “You know this stuff more than I do.”

Hyunjin beamed back at him, teeth all on show, shoving the leaflet into his pocket and grabbing Changbin by the wrist, in a hurry to escort him to some other exhibit.

The room they came to was just a large, white space with a singular, silver photo frame on the back encasing a sign saying, ‘ _No photography’_. In the middle of the room, there was a man, a real-life man, sitting on a stool, was painted in red and lilac in the middle of the room. He had various English words splashed across him, looking kind of pissed off.

There was nothing to stop people from interacting with him, no display box, or tape or anything. It was just a room, with a man in it. There wasn’t even a description, just a title, then a blank space where the description would be.

All of the spectators gathered in front of him, nodding in agreement at _something_ ; Changbin had no idea what.

“This one’s called… ‘ _Rose and the Lotus’_.” Changbin said, reading off the little placard once he had a chance to finally get closer.

“I know, I’ve really been looking forward to this one.” He replied, in awe. He shuffled further in, moving forward with the spectators to find a place at the front.

Changbin wasn’t really paying attention to the artwork, he was pretty distracted by the _other live art piece_ , in the room. He stood at the front even when the rest of the crowd moved on, staying firmly in place, watching the exhibit, consumed with wonder.

Changbin wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Hyunjin keep his mouth shut for longer than this, in the whole time he’d known him. Well, technically, it was wide open, gawking at all of the display, but the words certainly weren’t forming. Changbin walked a little closer to him, gripping on to his arm to make his presence known, snapping him out of his daze.

“What does _this_ mean, then?” Changbin whispered, slightly cynically.

“Well… I see it like... There’s a wall, right? Between artist and the onlooker, but it’s not a wall that is to lock us out, it locks him, in. It’s kind of, protection, I guess. From the outside world tainting him?” Hyunjin said, cocking his head to the side.

“What’s the jumbled letters for, the ones on his back?”

“My guess is… Maybe it’s a lack of freedom of speech, or trying to communicate something that gets lost in translation, but it’s… It’s interpretive, I guess. You can see it however you want. Not everything _needs_ to be understood. Some things just exist.”

“Huh…” Changbin said, nodding along again. “You’re… You’re really good at this kind of stuff, hmm?” He said, turning back. Before he knew it, Hyunjin had already made his way to the other side of the exhibit, gazing at the display from another angle, his eyes squinting to make out the lettering.

He flapped his hand at Changbin, as if to summon him over. Changbin slipped behind the other viewers, Hyunjin gripping on to his forearm to pull him forward and pointing at one of the words.

“This, this English word here, it means, like ‘ _rebirth’_. So, the lotus is a flower that’s grown on the ground in the dirt, but it becomes a really beautiful flower once it’s bloomed. It’s referenced in a lot of different cultures.” He said, before catching himself sipping into silent wonderment, then suddenly snapping out of it. “Uh, maybe. I don’t know though. Maybe I’m wrong.” He said, looking back at him, his fingers loosely sliding through the gap in Changbin’s arm to link them together.

“No, you’re probably right. It makes sense.” Changbin replied, smiling back at him. Hyunjin’s eyes were sparkling; his little façade had started to falter from underneath him as the night went on.

The cracks were starting to show.

And all Hyunjin was doing, was filling them with glistening lacquer, re-joining the fragments with gold, just like the ceramics he’d seen earlier.

“This is absolutely incredible. I can’t believe I’m here.” He squealed, squeezing his elbow to his chest, nearly crushing Changbin’s forearm.

“Changbin?” A low, burly, voice boomed from behind him.

He turned around at the mention of his name, coming face-to-face, with his Dad.

“Dad? You're here?”

Mr. Seo was standing there in his usual grey three-piece, his pretty assistant dressed head to toe in a long, black glittery dress and made up to high heaven. Her hair was pinned back in a sophisticated kind of bun with pins with little diamonds on. Behind him were his Dad’s usual lackeys and a photographer, of course.

Hyunjin’s eyes darted across to him, widening at the revelation, and Changbin instinctively unlinked Hyunjin’s arm, nudging him backwards slightly so that he wasn’t in his Dad’s immediate _firing line_. He hoped Hyunjin hadn’t taken it the wrong way.

“You actually came to this thing? I didn’t know you were into these kinds of ostentatious little art events, Changbin.” The man said. “I’m not sure I’m so keen on them myself. What the hell is all of this nonsense?” He laughed, gesturing to the painted man in the middle of the room.

“Uh, well. I mean, we did the stage lighting and some of the projections and audio, so I thought I’d come and check it out and maybe network a little? Make sure that everything ran smoothly.” He looked back to Hyunjin for a split second, his eyes failing to lock on. He suddenly felt guilt swelling in his chest. “And, uh. _Hyunjin_ , here, is really into contempory art. I came because of him, too.” He said, tugging him forward slightly.

“Hyunjin? The one you were talking about, huh?” The man repeated, his eyes scanning up and down the taller man.

“Talking about?” Hyunjin intercepted, and Changbin felt himself blushing; he’d been telling his Dad about Hyunjin before they were even ‘anything’. “All good things, I hope...”

“That’s an interesting _get up_ , Hyunjin.” His Dad said, pointing at the flower adorning his neck. “What’s your last name? It doesn’t feel right to meet one of my son’s acquaintances in such informality.”

“Uh, it’s Hwang, Sir.” He said, smiling sweetly and bowing through the discomfort. “And thank you, it’s actually one-of-a-kind, I kind of, crafted it, I guess.” He said, referencing the rose, looking down and fiddling with it to ensure the petals were neatly spaced and looking presentable.

“One-of-a-kind? Well, if _that’_ s what you kids are calling it nowadays…” The man said. “Well, the _rest_ of the suit, is wonderful, well-constructed.”

Hyunjin tilted his head, his eyes narrowing just slightly at the back-handed compliment.

“Thank you. It’s _Armani_.” He replied, more firmly than before.

“So, Mr. Hwang, how long have you and my son been dating?”

“Dad…!” Changbin shouted, intercepting their tense conversation, “This isn’t the time or the place for this. We’re not even—"

“—A few months.” Hyunjin replied firmly, surprising Changbin a little. “His son is in a performance that I’m putting on, so we met there.”

It was a lie, but Changbin was grateful for it. He thought that story was slightly more respectable than the way they actually first met. Which was after a kid’s talent show, totally annihilated on vodka shots, half-dressed, whilst at an 80’s themed, go-go bar…

His Dad’s eyes narrowed, a grimace appearing on one side of his mouth.

“A performance?”

“Yeah, I’m a drama teacher, at the high school. I’m teaching Seungmin right now. He’s very talented, Sir.” He said politely.

“I know, he’s _my_ Grandson…” He said, through nearly gritted teeth. “Changbin. Come aside with me, for a moment.”

He flicked his head towards the door, taking a few steps across the room to the other side. The assistant gave him the same sympathetic look that she always did, bowing to him as he walked by. Changbin looked back behind him to Hyunjin, a concerned look on his face mixed with the slight tinge of annoyance; but he concealed it well from people that didn’t know him.

They both stepped out of the doorway, just a little out of the exhibition room, and his Dad immediately sighed, shaking his head from side-to-side.

“Changbin. You’re making a total mockery out of me, you know that?”

“What?”

“I tried to be accepting of you, I really did. I even let you stay with that ridiculous, _mouthy_ ex-partner of yours. But now, you’re going to have some make-up slathered, flower-wearing, bleach-blonde bimbo on your arm? You’re a grown man; you’re far too old to be caught up in these little gold-digger situations…”

“Gold digger?! Is that what you think?!” Changbin repeated, totally stunned.

“Well, I’m guessing the suit wasn’t _his own_ purchase on a schoolteacher’s salary?!” He shouted, before taking a deep breath. “Look, I let it go with Minho, because he at least progressed his education somewhat and had a stable job; worked for a reputable firm. He was business savvy, at least, but _this?_ A high school drama teacher? You’re out of your damned mind if you think I’m going to allow this.”

“Allow this?! Dad, I’m _thirty_ years old, I don’t need your permission! I’ve really had enough of you constantly meddling into my private life. Hyunjin is a great guy and I really like him. He’s passionate and interesting and Seungmin really respects h—”

“—I don’t have the time to talk to you about this right now, Changbin. You do whatever you want, cavorting around with these little bunny-boilers, but _this time_ you throw your life away for some nobody, let’s hope you at least sign a Prenuptial Agreement…” He turned heel to walk back into the room, flicking his hand at him like he wasn’t even worth the effort of speaking to.

“You’re really a piece of work, Dad…”

“Excuse me?” He said, spinning back around.

“No, I won’t excuse you. I’m done excusing you. I’ve told you before that the way you speak to me, it’s not okay. I’m a grown man, like you said. I can make my own decisions on who I date. Hyunjin’s a good person, which is more than can be said for y—”

“—Umm, sorry to interrupt?” Hyunjin said, poking his head out of the doorway.

“My son and I are having a private conversation, young man. You’d do well to stay out of it.” The older man bellowed, pointing his finger directly at Hyunjin.

“I mean, if you’re going to just openly talk about me when I’m standing on the other side of the door, I’m kind of already involved in it? I can hear you; you know?” Hyunjin added, with a cocked eyebrow. Changbin could hear that _well-managed_ tinge of annoyance coming to a tipping point.

“Well, some things need to be addressed. Like, my son not falling for some little Siren’s money-laundering schemes.”

“Dad, that’s enough!” Changbin shouted.

“If you wanted to address them, you could have spoken to me directly _, Sir_. You don’t have to be so rude.” Hyunjin spat back, and Changbin’s eyes blew wide open. “And funnily enough, there’s more to people than money, not that you’d understand that with the way you clearly pay off all the people in your _entourage_. That _poor woman_ in there, she must really enjoy following you around like some little, lost puppy.”

“Oh dear, Changbin. Another _mouthy_ one, huh? With no respect for their elders? You really know how to pick them. Disgraceful.”

“—In my defence, Sir.” He said, a slight smile appearing. “Your son rather likes it when I’m _mouthy_. I’d like to think my mouth is one of my best features, actually…”

His Dad’s face totally dropped, his lips falling open at the sheer _audacity_ of Hyunjin. He let out a little gasp, totally astounded and unable to find the words. If he thought _Minho_ was combative, Hyunjin was like a cage-fighter, and he just knocked his Dad, clean out.

Changbin was so stunned at the comment that he had no idea what to do. All he knew was, he needed to get Hyunjin out of there before something really bad happened. That, and there were some _less than appropriate mental images_ fogging up his rational thoughts, right now.

“Let’s go, Hyunjin.” He said, grabbing the younger man by the wrist and pulling him through the crowd of art enthusiasts, going against the flow of people. They weaved their way through, back to the main entrance foyer with the shiny laminate floor, and Changbin took a breath, running his hands through his hair.

They stood there for a moment to try and regain their composure, and Changbin couldn’t help but let out a misguided _laugh._ He was going to get utterly slaughtered the next time he saw his Dad, but for some reason, it felt kind of exhilarating. He turned back to Hyunjin, expecting to see the same smug expression that he’d seen a few minutes earlier, but he was met with a blank face.

“I’m sorry, that was… I shouldn’t have—”

“—Don’t apologise, Hyunjin.”

“You… Are you sure you still want to try so hard, with me?” Hyunjin said, quietly, Changbin barely hearing him over the hum of people around them. He could see there were tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

“Woah? Hey, hey, come on?” Changbin gripped his face in both of his palms, angling him down to look at him. “What the— Of course, I want to. Come on, let’s get out of here and get some air.”

They walked along down a dimly lit street, no coats, just suit jackets to keep them warm on a dull winter’s evening. It was a Saturday night, so there were plenty of party goers traipsing around the streets heading towards the city centre, ready for their night of shenanigans and debauchery. 

Changbin walked closely next to him, sharing some of the warmth from their bodies, Hyunjin’s arm still snaked around his.

“Should we just get some food and go back to my place? I’m sorry that my Dad ruined your night. Plus, I know I’m not really the best at this _artsy_ stuff, but it makes me happy that you enjoyed yourself, for some of it, at least.”

“I more than enjoyed myself, Changbin. Going to that exhibit has been a dream of mine for years. Honestly, you have no idea how badly I wanted to go, and your Dad won’t ruin the pieces I did get to see. Plus, you _defended_ me… I’m grateful for that, too.”

“Well, he doesn’t even know you… It just sucks that you couldn’t stay until the end, I guess.”

“I saw most of what I wanted to.”

“Well, that’s good. You’ve been looking a little stressed out and a bit tired recently and I just hope that it made you feel at least, a _little_ better, because I think you deserv—"

Hyunjin suddenly stopped in his tracks, making Changbin turn back around, a little dumbfounded. He was staring down at the ground, blankly.

Suddenly, he looked up again, and Changbin was warmly welcomed by a needy hand gripping the back of his neck, then his body being pulled closer, and finally, the familiar feeling of Hyunjin’s cold, plush lips, pressing against his own.

Changbin kissed him back. _By God_ , he kissed him back. He’d been waiting all night to feel Hyunjin’s lips, and even though he was freezing, Changbin quickly felt his body warming up with the intensity of how fast his heart was beating.

Hyunjin angled himself to the left, allowing him some space to longingly explore Changbin’s mouth, before pulling back, planting a few smaller kisses to his bottom lip as he did. He removed his hand from his neck, instead opting to spread both hands across the surface area of his chest, gripping a little at his shoulders once he found them. He pressed their foreheads together, a little breathless from the kiss, just like he always was.

He could kiss Hyunjin for hours, days, nights, and never get tired of it.

They were pressed tightly together, chest-to-chest, and a few of the drunkards around the street that had seen, cheered them on, making Hyunjin break out in to some breathy giggles. Changbin could feel his warm breath, tickling the tip of his nose.

“You know… T-There’s a direct tram within walking distance of my apartment, from here… If you want.” Hyunjin said, unsteadily, finally opening his eyes.

“You’re serious? I mean, if you’re uncomfortable with that we can just go back to—”

“Yeah… Actually, I think I am... It’s cold and I just… Just, please don’t expect too much.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sidenote, the outfit I reference here is this totally amazing little suit [here](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Ens3lbqW8AAW06p?format=jpg&name=medium) because as soon as i saw it on insta i got lost in uwu
> 
> please enjoy! this is a lil fluffy!!! hyunjin finally cracked! THANK THE HEAVENS! 
> 
> hopefully nothing bad happens in the coming chapters to ruin this, haha (:
> 
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	11. Temptation: The Fiend At My Elbow

◕◕◕

He threaded his blazer jacket over the top of his arm, wandering in after Hyunjin, the sound of his keys hitting the little porcelain bowl on the side. He flicked the light switch on; the light slowly phasing from dim to brighter, casting the room in a yellowish hue. They both slipped their shoes off, both glad to be free of them after walking for a while.

Hyunjin’s place was so quintessentially _him_. There were little hanging shelves suspended on the walls containing little, clay ornaments and a couple of delicate-looking jewellery box-type trinkets. The couch was low, mounted closely to the floor and in dark grey to match the ‘distressed’ coffee table, and a couple of English DVDs were sprawled across it. 

There were three large-ish oval photographs, mounted across the brickwork on the main wall– one of him, Jisung and his straight friend with the curly, blonde hair smiling in to the camera at the beach, another of him and Jisung’s son with the foreign-sounding name, sticking their tongues out. And the last one, bizarrely, had nothing in it at all.

Hyunjin’s bay window opened out over the city, it was a pretty spectacular view, bar a few inexplicably placed building projects and some pretty intrusive scaffolding. It was bracingly cold, and he could smell the earthy aroma of the brickwork infused with whatever almond-scented something that he’d obviously been burning the night before.

It felt, serene, peaceful somehow.

He was almost sure he could hear Hyunjin’s uneven breathing behind him.

“Why on Earth would you be embarrassed of this place? The view’s better than my house!” Changbin exclaimed, making his way over to peer out of the window.

“It’s just, I know I don’t exactly live in the most _glamorous_ part of town. You’ll be lucky if you don’t leave this building without the munchies or some kind of face tattoo...” Hyunjin scoffed, pulling his things out of his pocket, and tossing them down on the coffee table.

“Ah.. That explains that blonde woman trying to sell me bath salts out of her purse on the way up here…” Changbin teased. “Your actual apartment though, it’s so…” He looked around, trying to take it all in. “You?”

“What, cold?”

“Pfft. You’re ridiculous. I would say, artistic? Or minimalistic? Whatever you would call it, I don’t know the term.” He glanced back to the tiny lights scattered across the cityscape through the bay window, pulling the curtain back a little.

“So, you’re saying, I’m _boring?_ ” Hyunjin mocked, making his way across to him. He loosely placed his arms over Changbin’s shoulders before letting his hands wander down to chest and settle there. He dropped his chin into the warm space between his neck and shoulder, wrapping himself around him.

“If _you’re_ boring, I’m paint drying…” Changbin said, scoffing, turning towards his face slightly at the contact until their cheeks pressed together. His eyes immediately met the younger man’s lips, his eyes lidded and heavy from exhaustion after the dramatics of tonight.

He lifted his hand to reach for his chin, tugging him further down over his shoulder to plant a peck to his lips. He twisted himself around, sliding his hands across both cheeks and settling his fingers either side of his jawline, trailing both of his thumbs over the soft skin either side of his mouth.

He weaved his fingers through the taller man’s blonde hair, yanking him forward to deepen yet another kiss; he couldn’t hold back. Hyunjin looked even more ethereal drenched in the subtle, night-time glow of the moonlight and it was driving him crazy. 

They kissed for a dizzying length of time, small sounds escaping Hyunjin’s mouth that sounded like a symphony of soft, beautiful whimpers and eager gasps of air in between them. Hyunjin’s fingers started exploring his chest, reaching to undo three of the buttons at the top of his shirt before pulling his tie apart at the collar to loosen it and drop it to the floor next to them.

He felt the sudden, dull, pang of teeth scraping along his neck and Hyunjin’s palms snaked across behind him to make him raise his arms, and before he knew it, he was eagerly rid of his shirt.

Hyunjin’s long, dainty fingers gripped on to either side of his biceps and then wrapped around his back, exploring the expanse of the space there. Changbin took that as an invitation to tug at the little black ribbon that hung around the younger man's neck, removing it carefully with his fingers and freeing _his_ neck from its confines, too.

Changbin lapped at his neck next, making him throw his head back, mouth falling open to stifle another little breathless noise. When he dropped his head back down, however, there was an unusually apprehensive look across the younger man’s face.

He looked at him, there was a special kind of longing, a different look than his usual smouldering desire for more. He looked scared; frightened of how deeply they’d become involved, and Changbin could sense it terrified him.

“What’s—What’s wrong?” Changbin muttered, continuing to kiss down his neck to his chest, little by little, lips barely even touching him.

"Changbin... I don't... Look, I haven't had anyone _here_ , for a long time.”

“There’s nothing wrong with your apartment Hyunjin, it’s really nic—”

“It’s not that… I- I guess I kind of thought that having you over here would make this thing between us, more real... More… _Definitive_?"

"And you _don’t_ want that?” Changbin said, pulling back and shaking his head lethargically from side-to-side. “Kind of getting mixed signals, here, Hyunjin…” Changbin laughed, sliding his hands down his body to drape them around his tiny waist, noticing how Hyunjin’s petite frame fit so perfectly in the span of his hands.

“It’s just… I moved into this apartment with my ex... I know it’s been like, a long time but it still…” He muttered, eyes flitting around anxiously.

"Okay, well, I’m not him, whoever he is…”

“I know but—”

“—You're so beautiful, Hyunjin." He uttered raspily, his eyes totally fogged over and glossy just from staring at him a little too intensely. Hyunjin just stared back at him, looking bewildered. “I mean it. I’ve wanted to tell you that all night.”

“I-I’m not. I just wear a lot of—”

“You are. I literally haven’t been able to keep my eyes off of you. I was watching you, more than the exhibits.” He said, darting back in and out of kissing him, making the younger man chase his mouth, more and more every time. “The way you were tonight, relaxed and enjoying yourself and… It just, it really makes me glad that I waited around for you. I can't believe I'm here with you, right now.” He murmured against his lips, essentially turning Hyunjin's whole body to gelatine in his hands, as he felt him relax into the grip and his head lull backwards slightly.

“I just— I don’t want to disappoint you…” Hyunjin said. Tears had started gathering at the corners of his eyes, glittering every so often when the light caught him. He immediately pulled his head upwards again to try and hold them back, biting at his own lip.

“What the heck are you talking about?” Changbin said, reaching for him again, pulling his head back down to re-connect their eyes.

“You were right, about when you invited me out with your friends… I—I was scared. But not of getting too drunk, I just panicked. I thought they wouldn’t _like_ me because of… Well, what I’m like... Then your Dad, today… I mean. He’s not exactly wrong about me.”

“No, he _is_ wrong. I don’t care about money, or what job you're in, or what you did before, or any of it, Hyunjin. I never have.”

“No, _but I do_. I don’t want you to tell me you care about me just because you _pity_ me, or you think you’re being some _martyr,_ or something.”

“Pity? Is that what you think? You know how I feel about you, Hyunjin. I haven’t exactly made it subtle... I mean, shit, I might have just lost my family inheritance for you, so if you’re about to tell me you don’t feel the same…” He joked woefully, making Hyunjin laugh through his tears, one slipping past his nose and down his cheek.

He dabbed his cheek to his shoulder to capture it, before exhaling. 

“No—I… I do…” He said, before stopping again to take another quick breath. “ _I do_ feel the same… It just, scares me, is all.”

“Why?” The older man responded quietly, wiping the excess of his tears away with his index finger.

“Because once you get to know me, you’ll realise I’m not… I’m just… I’m nothing special, and I know you’ve tried so hard to—”

Changbin placed his hands on either side of Hyunjin’s arms, stopping him in his tracks. He ran them down Hyunjin's arms to hold his wrists firmly in place, his whole hands stretched around them tightly.

“Stop. You’re worth trying so hard for. I really wish you’d see that.” He punctuated each word with a squeeze of his wrist, and Hyunjin weakly smiled at him, his head lowered towards his chest. It was sorrowful, and Changbin could tell that he wasn’t totally believing it, but there was the spark of _something_ awakening within him.

In that moment, he'd never felt so overwhelmingly sure of himself that he wanted to be with Hyunjin, no matter what it took. He internally scolded himself for falling so deeply and intensely in love with someone in a matter of months; it really was one of his greatest, and cruellest, traits.

“Let’s go to my room.” Hyunjin said, practically whispering it to him, re-attaching their lips with a little more vigour than before.

“Alright, if you _insist.”_ Changbin said, ghosting the words into his mouth.

Without a single ounce of nuance, he pulled back and dropped down, stretching his arms around the bottoms of the taller man’s thighs near his knees and lifting him clear off of the ground, throwing him over his shoulder in one foul swoop.

“Holy shit!—Some warning! Next time!” He screamed, failing his limbs around, scrambling to grip on to Changbin’s chest, holding on for dear life.

“If I warned you, you wouldn’t have let me…” Changbin laughed, hoisting him up and jostling him around a little to find a spot that was more comfortable for the younger man’s hips.

Hyunjin pointed out his bedroom, and Changbin took the short walk through the dark hallway and clambered through into it, hitting the light switch as he did, illuminating a bronze, wired lampshade, forming an unusual, branch-like shadow to stretch across the room.

The room was a kind of khaki green with another brickwork wall and more knickknacks scattered around the place, nothing particularly shocking or out of place, but still delightfully _Hyunjin._ His ‘closet’ was a never-ending, large rack of neatly hung up clothes standing next to some obscure grey bubble chair with a coarse, woollen, thick-knitted, beige blanket strewn over the black.

“You want lights on, or off?” Changbin asked, glancing around the room, swinging Hyunjin forwards and backwards as he did, little _‘Oofs!’_ escaping his mouth.

Changbin flung him back over, and lowered him to the bed, cradling his head as he placed him down, leaning over top of him. The bed was definitely lower than Changbin’s, a divan-style with a thinner mattress, but it was utterly drenched in fuzzy, grey blankets and little round cushions scattered all over it, giving the illusion that it was higher.

“Keep it on. I want to see you.” Hyunjin replied contently, running his palms up the older man's bare chest. He looked back up to him, smiling brightly in place.

Changbin had heard it before, those same words. This time, it felt different, more intimate and private than previously. 

Changbin sat back, straddling his thighs, staring down at him in awe of the pretty painting laid out in front of him. He reached his hands out, feeling Hyunjins' wind their way around his own, each finger weaving tightly around the other man’s adjacent one until they were locked together.

Changbin could feel that the younger man’s hands were trembling, but he didn't let go, this time, like he usually would.

He really wasn't fooling anyone, not even himself, anymore.

◕◕◕

Changbin strolled in through the entrance, scanning his lanyard at the door to open the barrier into the building’s foyer. The receptionists smiled at him sweetly as he nodded and bowed his way through, waltzing into the main corridor.

He pressed for the elevator button, waiting a few minutes for it to descend whilst scrolling through his emails. As it opened, there were a few other staff members happily chatting away, greeting him as he entered, giving him a little more space as soon as they saw him, as a sign of respect. 

He was smiling to hide how _utterly terrified_ he was to face his Dad after the other night. They hadn’t emailed, or spoken on the phone, not so much as even an angry text from his Mom. He masked it well, some of the staff even commenting on his ‘glow’ and how bright and charismatic he looked today!

He wasn’t sure if they were just pleasantries because everyone _did_ kind of suck up to him a little, or if he actually did have that post-satisfaction glow plastered all over his face. Knowing he’d finally managed to bag literally the most attractive man alive did put a certain swagger in his step.

He came to the tenth floor, exiting the elevator with bows to the staff. It was eerily quiet on the tenth floor, which was usually bustling with board meetings, seminars, and training sessions, but even the upstairs receptionist wasn’t sitting at her regular desk. It was unnerving for some reason, and he felt a strange sense of apprehension that he’d not received a memo about the meeting being cancelled, or something.

He knocked on the board room door a few times before entering, looking around the room in confusion. Instead of his regular group of senior peers, he was greeted by six or seven unfamiliar faces, as well as his Dad, and one other woman standing wearing a dark grey suit at the back of the presentation with a remote in her hand, clicking through the slides.

“Um, good morning?” Changbin said timidly. “Did I—Did I get the time wrong?”

“Not at all. Mr. Seo, please come in.” The woman said politely, a wide smile across her face. She looked back to her presentation board, covered in graphs and figures for something – definitely not the plans for this years’ _City Centre Christmas Celebration_ light show, which is what he was expecting to be discussing today…

He slipped down into the chair next to his Fathers’, the older man’s gaze from the board never faltering from looking ahead; he didn’t even acknowledge him. He considered that maybe the silent treatment was the best outcome he could have wished for, it was better than being verbally skinned alive, he thought.

He glanced down, in front of him were the plans for a lighting project at _Ttukseom Theme Park_.

“Morning, Dad.” Changbin said, quietly under this breath. His Dad immediately held his index finger up to silence him, and Changbin just accepted it. He looked around the room, scanning over the unfamiliar faces surrounding him.

“What’s… What’s all this? I thought we were discussing this years’ annual Christmas and New Years show? And where’s Ms. Sung?” He said, looking around, expecting to see his Dad’s friendly yet hideously-overworked assistant standing politely in the doorway or shadowing behind him.

“I fired her.” He responded, blankly.

“What?! Why?” Changbin said, totally perplexed.

“She was getting lippy. Can’t have that now, can we?” He said, finally looking back across to him, a menacing scowl across his face.

“Dad, Ms. Sung has been your assistant for six years? And these plans, they’re not even—”

“It’s not Dad, in the boardroom, Changbin. It’s Mr. Seo.” He said abruptly, cutting him off.

“What? I just… I really think that—”

“Also, only key _shareholders_ can be part of the conversations regarding the projects we pick, Changbin.”

“Only—Wait, _what?_ ” His eyes darted down again, the title on the project – the name of the event director wasn’t him like usual, it was… _His sister’s_ name etched across the title sheet…

Suddenly, there was a tapping on the door, three solid knocks. His sister strolled in, in a full black pantsuit, clutching a briefcase in front of her lap, hands wrapped tightly around the handle. She looked like she was trembling, her knees slightly buckled in. He wasn’t used to seeing his older sister look so anxious, it was usually _him_ that went to _her_ , for advice, as she was a little older. He looked at her, cocking his eyebrow, but she wouldn’t give him any kind of eye contact.

Next to her, was another man. A devastatingly handsome, taller man dressed head-to-toe in the most vibrant, pin-striped, blue, three-piece suit that he’d ever seen.

He was broad, it was obvious by the width of his shoulders, and well groomed, with black hair neatly coiffed and sprayed backwards to show off his smooth forehead. There wasn’t a single wrinkle across it, but he still looked the same age as him. He was showcasing a blinding smile, all of his pearly-white teeth on display, locking eyes with him immediately.

“What’s… What’s this? What’s going on here?” Changbin asked, totally failing to mask his distaste.

“Changbin, your older sister will be appointed main shareholder moving forward, and we’ve brought in Hyunshik, here, to help with financing the transfers.” He said, gesturing to the man next to his sister, leaning back lethargically in his chair. “He’s one of the best in the game, incredibly assiduous and well-known in the biz. Obviously, we had to make a few _cuts_ to bring in the new team, but once all the kinks are smoothed out—

“You’re kidding me?!” Changbin said, exploding out of his chair, knocking it to the ground with a thud. “What the hell?! I deal with the organisation’s planning, and all the financing?!”

“Like you dealt with the financing for paying…” He trailed off, then looked across at some paperwork, shuffling it in his fingers and pulling his spectacles down to glance through them. “Twelve million won, just to sponsor some amateur drama performance acted by high schoolers?”

“Changbinnie… I didn’t want you to find out like—” His older sister muttered, her tone painstaking and apprehensive. Before she could continue, the handsome man in the three-piece stepped forward, placing his arm out in front of her _heroically_.

“Look, Mr. Seo, I know what you’re thinking. I’ve been in these kind of tense situations before, and I know it’s difficult for you at this stage, but—

“Don’t speak to me! I don’t even know you! Who is this man?!” Changbin shouted, pointing at him. He wasn’t about to lose his position in the company he’d worked so damned hard for to _his sister_ ; who had barely any say in any of the affairs here in the last ten years, and her new little white-knight, boyfriend.

He looked around in revulsion, expecting to see people agreeing with him, but with none of the ‘regular team’ of senior peers to back him up, he was suddenly _incredibly aware_ that he knew nobody in this room, now.

“Sit down, Changbin. You’re making a scene.” His Dad said, chuckling to himself.

Changbin looked around again, all of the other people in the room looking away from him uncomfortably at the painfully awkward atmosphere. He straightened up, running his hands over his suit to try and smooth himself out.

“I’m leaving. And by the way, that ‘ _amateur drama performance acted by high schoolers’_ means a lot to your grandson, just so you know.” He spat, before storming out of the board room and slamming the door on the way out. His heart was throbbing away, throttling his ribcage as exited. He was totally tunnel-visioned, his peripheral disintegrating in his rage as he marched through the corridor.

“Mr. Seo!” The new, smarmy man in the blue suit shouted, sliding out of the door behind him. “Mr. Seo!” He shouted again, a little louder this time. He started speed walking, then increasing his pace to a slight jog to catch up with him, bobbing along beside him as he spoke. “Mr. Seo, please, I would like us to be on good terms—”

“Good terms, that’s hilarious—”

“—I know this looks bad, and I’ve been made aware that there’s some tension in your family right now, but I just want you to know that I’ll be totally unbiased on all situations. I’m really not a bad person, I don’t want to cause—

Changbin stopped in his tracks, balling his fists up in his hands, and repeating ‘ _be calm, be calm’_ to himself in his head. He turned back to look at him, his eyes unyielding.

“Look, I’m not pissed off at you, I’m pissed off at my Dad, and my sister and my goddamn—"

He hesitated again. He had no idea why he was shouting at this man; this man he barely knew. The last thing this guy probably wanted was to be dragged into some shitty family affair on his first day on the job. 

He assumed that his Dad probably roped the poor guy in, dangling money over his nose and promising him a whole host of opportunities and chances at grandeur that were better than whatever company he worked for before. The truth was, barely anyone in this company got anywhere, his Dad pretty much stifling all chances of promotions by hiring only his close friends and family members as senior partners.

Eventually hooking this guy up with his sister was the perfect scenario for his Dad to totally oust Changbin out of the company once they ended up together. It was ruthless, vindictive, and corrupt beyond belief, and Changbin wasn’t surprised in the slightest at the lows his own Father would stoop to.

“Please, I’m sure if you get to know me, you’ll find out that I’m really not a bad person. I just want this change-over to go as smoothly as possible, for everyone, Mr. Seo.” The man apologised. 

“It’s Changbin.” He said, exhaling.

“Pardon?”

“My name, is Changbin. You can call me Changbin for God’s sake...”

“My apologies, Changbin.” The man said, looking at him politely in a way that made Changbin feel utterly fucking awful. He ran his fingers across his browbone, acutely aware of his oncoming headache. 

“No, _I_ —I should… I should apologise. I don’t even know you and I’m here shouting at you like some… Like some crazy person. Look, I’m sorry to tell you, but my Dad is simply just using you to get back at me. All because he doesn’t like the guy I’m dating. That’s pretty much the crux of it.”

“I mean… The offer he made me; it was too good to refuse the job. I am sorry to hear that, though. That must be an incredibly difficult time, for you.” He responded, nodding at his words, remorse in his eyes.

“Yeah well, it’s not exactly something I’m not used to, by now.”

“I remember when I first introduced my family to one of _my_ first boyfriends, it was… Difficult, to say the least.” The other man said, ducking his head down to mask a slight laugh and rubbing over the back of his nape.

Changbin cocked his head, his eyes squinting just a little.

“Well, I really hope you can resolve your problems, with your Father, Changbin. If you’d be interested in it, I’d rather like to discuss any further plans with you more in depth, at some point. Maybe we can catch lunch, or something. I really would enjoy the job a lot more if we were on good terms with each other.”

“Uh, sure. That’s…. That’s fine…” Changbin stuttered.

The man in the vibrant, blue suit graciously bowed to him, before turning heel to head back down the hallway, back to the board room. Changbin’s head was spinning, his thoughts were totally glazed over.

Did that guy just say what he thought he just said?

Suddenly, a text came through, his phone buzzing in his back pocket continuously. He could tell it was Hyunjin, as he usually opted to send a string of trivial messages consecutively, rather than just writing one, longer message containing all the information he needed to tell him...

He glanced at the screen as the message bubbles appeared, snapping him out of his thoughts.

* * *

 _19:11_ **Hyunjin** 💕:

holy shit

some kid legitimately threw up on me during FIRST PERIOD

projectile vomited during a /mime performance/

but it wasn’t mime, it was real 🙃

how did it go with your dad?

at least it couldn’t have been any worse than my day so far, jfc x

* * *

He looked up from his phone, letting go of a sigh he didn’t realise he’d been holding on to for so long. He glanced back over to the board room door, feeling incredibly uneasy in the pit of his stomach. 

_It was definitely worse,_ Changbin thought. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)  
> what's that, we're 40k words in and we're now only just getting to the crisis point???
> 
> *inserts Honey, you got a big storm comin' gif here*
> 
> twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	12. A Minstering Angel Shall My Sister Be

◕◕◕

“You smell good. Really good... Kind of like…” He nuzzled his nose into the back of Hyunjin’s hair, pulling him in closer with both arms wrapped around his stomach. He pulled him in tighter towards his side of the bed, squeezing him against his chest.

“Like that _Versace_ aftershave of yours, the one in the black bottle at the back of your wardrobe? Yeah, you’re right. That’s because I’m wearing it. It’s _mine_ now.” Hyunjin teased.

“Hey. That’s my going ‘ _out, out_ ’ smell.” Changbin retorted, a slight pout slipping through.

“Weird, I’ve never smelt it when I’ve seen you going ‘ _out, out_ ’?”

“I stopped using it. Hard to keep all the guys off me when I wear it…” Changbin scoffed, eliciting soft breathy chuckles from the younger man.

“Pfffft…”

“I’m serious!”

“Whatever.”

“Awh, don’t get mad, jealous. You’re the only one in bed with me. Remember that.” Changbin said planting a quick peck on his cheek before unravelling them and lying flat out on his back to stretch out his arms and shoulders.

He grabbed at Hyunjin’s side near his hip, tugging the younger man in his direction to roll over to face towards him, met with no resistance, this time. 

“Hmm, well, don’t get too used to it. Call it a probationary period.” Hyunjin teased softly, opening one eye to look up at him.

Changbin rolled his eyes, shifting upwards until he was sitting up in the bed against the headboard. He glided his arms around Hyunjin’s shoulders; encasing him, pulling him upwards and closer so Hyunjin was resting with his head against his chest in his arms. 

“This, right here. It feels so good.” Changbin said contently.

“It’s… Alright.” Hyunjin teased, ghosting his fingertips over a little slither of skin sneaking out from under his white t-shirt before reaching for his neck.

Changbin just laughed, tilting his head to the side to allow him the space. Hyunjin had always told him that he smelt like sandalwood, whatever that smelt like. Whatever it was, it sent him crazy.

“Oh yeah, how was it with your Dad? Awkward, I assume?” He asked, sneaking little, airy kisses to one side of his neck.

“Understatement. He’s threatening to make my sister the key shareholder of the company…”

“Holy shit! What?!” Hyunjin said, suddenly pushing himself upwards with the palms of his hands, eyes blown totally open.

“Oh, yeah. Didn’t I mention? Don’t worry, he’s bluffing. He’s just really stubborn. He also brought on this new guy as well, just to try and intimidate me, or something, but it turns out he's a total soft touch. It takes ages to get through to my Dad, but eventually he’ll leave us alone once he’s realised that he isn’t going to change my mind about you.”

“Shit, I feel, kind of bad about it all. I didn’t realise—”

“—Nothing’s going to happen. Funny thing is, the guy he brought in, _Hyunshik_ , or something. He told me he’s gay.” Changbin said with a laugh, pushing a few strands of hair away from Hyunjin’s face. The younger man suddenly leaned back to look back at him, cocking an eyebrow.

“W-What? Why would that come up?” Hyunjin said, a little scowl creeping across his face.

“Well, at first, I assumed he was my sister’s new boyfriend, but he kind of let it slip.”

“Okay… So, what…?” Hyunjin pushed himself up to his knees, to look at him directly, lips parting just a little as if he wanted to say something.

“What?” Changbin retorted, genuinely confused.

“Why did you feel the need to tell me that...?”

“I—I just, thought it was a funny coincidence? My Dad’s been pretty much trying to convince me my sexuality was a ‘phase’ for fifteen years, and now he goes and hires someone gay without even realising it...”

“Without reali…” Hyunjin trailed off, rubbing his fingers over his eye sockets. “God. You’re so dense…”

“What!?”

“You. Are. So. _Dense._ ” He said, exhaling, shaking his head from side-to-side. He threw himself back down on the bed, facing away from him, turning over to mask a laugh before slipping back under the comforter. He pulled it tightly over his shoulders up to his neck, letting out a little huff under his breath.

He was so adorable; Changbin had totally forgotten that Hyunjin was actually insulting him…

He turned back towards him in to a spooning position and reached his hand across the left-hand side of Hyunjin’s face, raking his fingers through his soft hair and settling his thumb just to the side of his lips, brushing over the defined line of his jaw.

Hyunjin leant into the touch, twisting back around to look at him connecting their eyes for a moment before closing them again. He was still kind of giggling, but Changbin had long forgotten what they were even talking about.

He leant in, kissing him softly, their lips barely even touching, just for a few seconds. Hyunjin gripped on to his wrist, pulling himself further up to deepen the kiss, sliding his own hand around Changbin’s neck to angle himself.

He felt so wrapped in contentment; it was all he’d wanted for months.

He pulled back from his lips a moment, still half-lidded, gazing at the younger man, mentally carving the image on his heart, the sight of him, cosy and content, staring at him like they were the only two people in the world.

He blinked a few times, Changbin staring at him long enough that he could count the delicate lashes across each of his lids, then moving across to focus on the slightly-faded mole just below his eye. His jaw was so sharp and sleek that he felt the dull ache of his chilled chin juxtaposed with how smooth his cheeks looked in the morning, all mushed up to his eyes. He heard the younger man exhale, a small upturn of his lip at the corner as he looked at him before kissing him again. Everything just felt so categorically perfect… 

“ _So_ , what exactly are we?” Changbin suddenly asked, pulling away from the kiss.

“What?” Hyunjin said breathlessly, in between kissing him again. “What do you mean?” Hyunjin leant back up to look at his face, confusion across his brow.

“I’m just, kinda intrigued, I guess. After this last week or so… We’re kind of… Together? I assume?”

He winced, _immediately regretting it_ as soon as he saw Hyunjin pull backwards a little...

“I mean, I guess the labels just, kind of scare me.” He replied, ghosting his fingertips delicately over the his collarbones and neck. “That’s all.”

Luckily, he didn’t freak out this time, but he could definitely tell that the atmosphere had shifted; something slightly more accusatory in his tone. Hyunjin leant back down to lay his head across his pillow again, facing him this time, taking a deep breath and relaxing there. It was peaceful again, just the soft hum of the TV playing quietly in the background.

And Changbin just had to push it, didn’t he? _He couldn’t just leave well enough alone_ , he thought.

“I mean… Labels are kinda _good_ sometimes…” He said light-heartedly, trying to be precautious about how he approached the subject. “Makes it a little easier to, y’know... Work out what’s going on…” He said, before punctuating his sentence with a nervous laugh that sounded a lot more self-assured in his head. 

_Just stop Changbin, just stop now,_ he repeated to himself.

“Look the last time I was ‘labelled’ I… I had my heart broken and I just don’t want to go through that, again.” Hyunjin responded, much more openly than he’d expected.

_Just stop here and save yourself the stress._

“Why? I mean, what happened between… You know, you and whoever?”

_Seriously, just stop._

Suddenly, Hyunjin pushed himself up from the bed, launching the comforter off of them both and swinging himself into a sitting position at the side of the bed. He leant down to reach for his bunched up shirt off of the floor, immediately sliding it over his head and sighing.

“H-Hyunjin? Come on, I’m just— Come on, I was just— Please, don’t be so sensitive. It was just—” Changbin stuttered, reaching his hand out to him.

“—Please, Changbin. I’ve had such a good time with you these last few weeks, and now you’re trying to press me for more… It’s…” He threw his head back gripping at the side of the bed with both hands, scrunching at the blankets in his palms. “God it’s so…”

Changbin immediately shuffled closer to him, wading across to him, shifting across the bed on his knees.

“Hyunjin, I—Come on, babe, it was just—Look, don’t worry about it.” Changbin said, a little taken aback at his sudden outburst. He placed a gentle kiss to the centre of his back, rubbing soothing little circles into his left shoulder blade.

“Well, I told you it’s weird for me _.._.” He said, tears forming in his eyes, before springing back around to look at him. “And what did you just call me?”

“Shit, sorry… It- I’m sorry it just kind of came out—” He threw his hands up defensively, mind in total disarray. “I just want to know why you’re—”

“Why I’m _what,_ exactly?” Hyunjin snapped.

“I mean, after the museum and the messaging and _this_ and everything… I kind of assumed we were, like official? I guess? I don’t know but you’re so closed off? Or like… Difficu—No, not _difficult_ just.” He stumbled around, trying to look for the right words, or the ones that wouldn’t get him kicked out of his own bed.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck stop talking,_ he repeated to himself. His innermost thoughts launching out of his mouth quicker than he was able to suppress them.

“I mean like, I know you’re not into relationships and stuff, but I guess I’m just interested as to _why_ you’re—"

“You really want to know, huh?” Hyunjin said, quickly turning his head back to look at him, frustration in his eyes.

“Well, I just feel like—"

“My ex-boyfriend, he cheated on me. Multiple times, in fact. That’s what happened.” He said, totally deadpan, looking straight ahead into the mirrored surface of Changbin’s closet. “Happy, now?”

“W-What…? Wait, of course I’m not happy… I just—”

“—We’d planned this trip to Nepal because it was like, my fantasy vacation, and I was… I found a ring. It was silver and it had this beautiful, aquamarine diamond on it that probably cost more than I’d even earnt in my life… I thought he was going to _propose to me_ , on that trip. Turns out, I was very, _very_ wrong.” He turned back, staring desolately at himself in the mirror before dropping his head down to lull at his chest.

“Holy shit...” Changbin said, totally stunned into silence for a moment after. “ _You_ , were going to get _married_?”

“Yeah, funny that. Didn’t imagine I was the type to _settle down_ , huh?” He scoffed. “It’d been going on for six months. He’d been fooling around with some higher-up in his company to get himself to this dream position of his. I only found out because his sister took pity on me and told me what was going on, so, he went on the trip on his own, and he never came back.”

“Wait, so, you never actually officially broke it off? Hyunjin, shit. I shouldn’t have pressed—” He slipped himself around Hyunjin’s back, ignoring the awkward positioning due to their height, resting his cheek against Hyunjin’s back.

“Then I found out, there were more guys; pretty much the entire time we were together. When I told him I’d found out, he didn’t even _pretend_ to care... He… He laughed. He said it was obvious from the start that we weren’t ‘ _lifestyle compatible_ ’, and that whatever little fantasy world I was living in wouldn’t last forever.” He scoffed, looking around the room anxiously.

“That’s… That’s fucking awful. How… How long were you together?”

“Three and a half years.” He sighed. “Too long. Three and a half days would’ve been too long.” 

“Holy shit.” Changbin said, totally despairingly, wrapping his hands around Hyunjin’s waist even tighter.

“It’s been a _long_ time Changbin, but it still hurts to think about it. I don’t know why. I’d like to think I’ve moved on from it all but every now and then… It’s so _humiliating._ ”

“Hyunjin, you have a right to be upset, you don’t have to pretend all the time that this kind of shit doesn’t faze you.”

“Obviously, I’m a shitty judge of character. He just made it seem... So real between us. But it was all fake, anyway.”

“Not necessarily. Sometimes, people change? But listen, everything I‘ve been saying to you, I really mean it. I really do want us to be together, properly. I’d never pull any of that kind of shit. You know me.” He pulled back, moving himself to sit directly next to him.

He leant his head against the taller man’s shoulder, placing his hand on his thigh reassuringly. Hyunjin glanced at him in the reflection, a small smile appearing before he dabbed at his tears with his wrist.

“I know. I— I guess, I feel… Well, I feel, good around you. Really good. Like, I don’t even know how you put up with me, but you do and it’s… I’m sorry, that I’m—

“—A total pain in the ass...?” Changbin interjected.

“Yeah. I guess it’s just… I don’t want to have to go through that kind of thing again.” He wiped at a single tear that slipped out. “You know… The worst part is… I’ve been on the other side. I’ve watched people throw away their relationships for me, then I’ve rejected them just because I _could_.”

“Hyunjin…” Changbin responded, empathetically, rubbing his palm up across his knee and thigh.

“No, I’ve done it too. I’ve made men cheat, I’ve slept with people’s boyfriends, I’ve let people spend money on me until they’re fucking practically bankrupt, Changbin. I’m literally the thing I hate the most and I…” His lip quivered, and suddenly, more tears were falling without remorse. He placed the back of his wrist across his eyes again, breathing deeply to try and get himself together.

“—Stop hurting yourself, we’ve all done shit we regret.” Changbin cooed, his voice quieter than before. He felt kind of helpless, but he considered it was better for him to let it out, than stew in the despair of his own past for too much longer.

“Not shit like what _I’ve_ done. I’ve literally laughed at people who’ve said I ruined their relationship. I’m no better than him…” He sobbed, his cries becoming a little more consistent and heartier in tone, like he could no longer hold it back no matter how much he tried to choke them back in.

Changbin quickly bounded off of the edge of the bed with a _thud_. He quickly settled in between his knees, kneeling on the ground, looking up at him. He gripped either side of his tear-swollen face, which had fallen to his chest, raising him to lock their eyes together.

“Listen to me. Whatever happened, whatever he did, whatever you did—or, you’ve done or whatever. I don’t care, Hyunjin.” He said firmly, hoping that his reassuring words would be some relief to him.

“Well, you should… If this is what you want to get yourself involved w—”

“Sure, you obviously wanted people to hurt for you, but that’s all in the past now, and it’s never coming back. Okay?” He swiped at his cheeks, trying to wipe his tears away, before placing the flats of his palms on the other side of either of his thighs again, gripping tightly to reassure him that he wasn’t going anywhere.

“I mean…” He sniffled.

“I just… All I want is you. I want you, to be mine, officially. I want to refer to you as my boyfriend, and take you out properly and brag about you to my friends and—”

“—Brag, about me? Why?” He said despondently, looking down at him with so much genuine confusion that Changbin felt like his heart was disintegrating at the sight of him; crumbling apart at the vulnerable look on Hyunjin’s face.

He really wasn't fooling himself.

“I could write a list, but you’d get bored of me.” Changbin said, smiling at him again.

“What about the boys?” Hyunjin asked, sniffling a few times. “What about Seungmin and Jeongin?”

“What about them?” Changbin retorted.

“Do I… I mean, will they know, about _us_?”

“I mean, obviously they’ll have to find out eventually. We don’t have to tell them straight away or anything if that makes you feel weird.”

“Holy shit. I just—I don’t know.”

“I think you do know, and when you’re ready, you let me know.” He said, resolutely. He rose to his feet, leaning down to delicately sweep Hyunjin’s bangs back behind his ear, placing a sweet kiss in the centre of his forehead.

◕◕◕

“Good morning, everyone.” Changbin groaned, slotting into his usual seat next to his Dad’s chair at the board room desk. He and Hyunjin had been drinking a little last night, so he was very aware of how _particularly bright white_ the conference room looked, today…

Around four of the other staff had arrived, leaving just his sister and Hyunshik remaining to appear. His sister didn’t often actually attend the meetings, preferring to deal with things from home. Changbin considered that perhaps she’d felt embarrassed about finding out about the handsome man’s sexual preferences, or she really was just bound into this by force by their Dad – which he’d also believe.

“Where’s Hyunshik? I told him that we were going to start at 9:00am?” Changbin asked, peering at his _Chaumet_ watch, then at his Father, who was lethargically scrolling through his emails on his iPad on the desk, the font enlarged to around size eighteen…

“He messaged to say he was going to be late, calm down, Changbin.” He responded with a sigh, barely even concerned that two of his staff members weren’t here.

“He’s always late, Dad...”

“He runs errands for me, and he has his reasons. He’s not late by choice.” The older man snapped.

“Fine.” Changbin scoffed, crossing his arms across his chest.

“You’ve been very snappy lately, Changbin.” His Dad said, a grin appearing across his face. It really riled Changbin to no end, but he knew that was his Fathers own personal brand of ‘testing him’ to see how far he could push it before Changbin lashed out. As soon as he lashed out, he knew he’d lose.

“Wow, you’ve noticed, huh?” He retorted, dryly.

“Maybe it’s paying your ex all that money for your own kids, or maybe you’re just getting tired of running around after that money-laundering, floozy?” His Dad said, digging at him a little deeper.

The comment lit a fire inside of his chest, and he could feel his fingernails digging into his palms under the table. He swallowed, before straightening up. He muffled his voice slightly, all too aware that there were other people at the opposite side of the table.

“Dad, I’ve told you before, that is money for the boys. And I’m not breaking up with Hyunjin. I’m an adult and I like him, and you should respect my decisions…”

“I can _understand_ your decisions, Changbin, but it doesn’t mean I have to respect them. You’re an idiot in love, and you always will be. Unfortunately for you, you never really think before you fall...”

Suddenly the door burst open, causing Changbin to stop in his tracks, his head snapping up to look at the commotion. Hyunshik burst through, causing a ruckus as he dropped a few things around him; some papers, a few bags and a thermal flask. Changbin immediately got out of his chair to assist him, scooping up some of the papers into his arms and placing them on the desk in front of them.

“O-Oh, thank you, Sir. Sorry I’m late, Mr. Seo and Mr. Seo, Jr.” Hyunshik said, bowing courteously into the room. He looked dishevelled, and Changbin couldn’t help but feel bad for the guy. His Dad really did like to run his staff around whenever he could.

He was wearing some kind of tweed-style, khaki vest over top of a white shirt with a grey, woollen coat over top. When he pulled his coat off, and Changbin looked up to notice that the sleeves of his shirt were rolled up to his elbows, and his top button wasn’t done up, making it peek slightly over the top of his slackened tie. His hair hadn’t been styled in its usual way, either. It seemed like he’d obviously just showered and come straight here without preparing. It would probably explain his slightly less ‘made up’ face, too.

Although Changbin had only known the man a few weeks, he knew it was fairly unusual to see him not totally primed and proper like normal.

“Apologies for my appearance, Mr. Seo, I told you about my sister’s health?” He said apprehensively, placing down some brown paper bags as well as a laptop bag, then his flask.

“Of course, Hyunshik. Family means a lot to me too.” His Dad said, shooting a glaring look back across at Changbin. “I completely understand, and don’t worry about it. What’s a few minutes, in the grand scheme of things?”

Changbin looked around, perplexed; he had no idea what they were talking about, and it was so unlike his Father to pardon anyone’s tardiness... 

“Well, I’ve got the plans all laid out for today’s meeting.” Hyunshik said, dropping down his flask and the papers, putting his index finger and middle finger on the pages, sliding them over to their side of the table.

“Great job.” His Dad said, unenthusiastically. “I’ll let you lead for a moment. I’m going to make a phone call. All of you, make yourselves useful whilst I’m gone, work for your money...” Mr. Seo said, with a sigh.

He pulled himself out of his chair to exit, before Changbin interrupted. He looked at the paperwork in front of him through squinted eyes, the plans were so detailed and intricate, different rig set ups and even the contacts for each of the members of the design and audio teams.

“—Great job?” Changbin said, looking at his Dad. “Just, _great job_? I mean, these floorplans, and the ceremony plans, they’re great? I can’t actually believe you’ve finished so much of it already?” He said, totally perplexed, looking back to Hyunshik who was wearing a subtle blush at the sudden praise.

Changbin watched as his Dad wandered off, making some typical Dad noises as he rose, mumbling something under his breath.

“Wow, honestly, Hyunshik. Ignore him, these are… Amazing, truly.”

“Well, whatever I can do to assist you, Mr. Seo—I mean _, Changbin_.” He laughed, shooting him a little ‘finger gun’ across the table. “I hope you don’t mind I still speak to you formally in front of your Father. I fear he’d not like it if I were to start acting too ‘loose’, or casual.”

“It’s not a problem.” Changbin scoffed. The idea of Hyunshik acting ‘loose’ made him laugh; he was so prissy and uptight it was almost criminal; _definitely a boys’ boarding-school kid_ , Changbin thought.

Changbin had been pleasantly surprised at the impact Hyunshik had had on his work’s atmosphere, and the business, in general. His Dad had ‘settled’ slightly over the last few weeks, and he seemed to be taking a rather hefty proportion of Changbin’s usual workload off of his hands, whilst still keeping him in the loop. Sometimes he even acted almost like Changbin’s own personal assistant, which wasn’t what he was expecting, at all.

On his third day, he even brought him a toffee bagel and a coffee to his office.

He had a calming demeanour, comparatively soft and well-spoken, which perfectly contrasted with him and his Dad, who often got heated during board meetings. He acted like a great middleman, and his Father really seemed to respect his opinion, so Changbin considered he must have been a good pick-up.

Other than that, he knew nothing about the man, only the fact that he liked to look after himself, obviously came from some money, and that he had a bachelor’s degree in business administration; because he’d seen that on his CV...

But hell, if it kept his Dad off of his back and brought his workload to a manageable level, who was he to complain?

His phone started ringing, a loud _Day6_ song; Seungmin’s song, blaring out of the speaker. He tapped the silence button. Seungmin knew better than to not call him at work, and if it were urgent, he’d text, too.

“Was that, your boyfriend?” Hyunshik asked, peering inquisitively across the table, still ruffling with some papers across the other side.

“Oh, no, that was just my son. One of them.”

“You have children?” He said, his eyes widening in surprise. “Gosh, I love kids.”

“Oh, yeah? I have two boys.”

“Oh right. What’re their names?” He asked.

“Seungmin, he’s 9, and Jeongin, he’s 8.” Changbin reached for his phone, tapping it to illuminate his screen, lighting up an image of them.

It was a photo from Jeongin’s 7th birthday party at a petting zoo; Jeongin utterly terrified of the goat standing next to him chewing on his hoodie toggle and Seungmin smiling along like nothing was even happening, holding two thumbs up to the camera.

“What about you?” Changbin asked.

“Sorry?” The man stuttered, still trying to re-gather this things, little sighs escaping his mouth.

“Any kids, or anything?”

“Oh, no! No, no! Nothing like that. Just a dog!” He said, nodding at him politely.

“Ah.”

“That’s enough for me, though! I do love kids, I just haven’t… _Y’know_ , found anyone worth sharing some with.” He chuckled. “Plus, I have quite a lot of responsibilities right now regarding my family so I’m sure now wouldn’t be the right time for me. Hopefully, some day. I’ve secretly always dreamed of getting married and having kids.”

“Honestly, I did, too.” Changbin laughed. “Unfortunately, my first long-term relationship ended kind of messily, but at least I got my boys from it…”

“Well, they look like great boys. Definitely makes it worth it, then.” The other man said, beaming across at him. Changbin couldn’t help but notice that his teeth were so pearly white and perfectly aligned. They were so bright he was sure they’d sink the _Titanic._

“Your hair is a lot longer than I thought. Like, when it’s not styled.” Changbin said, trying to fill the awkward silence without his Dad there.

“Oh gosh, it’s just a mess. I’m just a mess today, there's just... A lot going on. But it's not a problem! I'm still focused on my work!” The man responded nervously, a slight pink tinge to his ears. “I’m so embarrassed that people are seeing me like this.”

“It’s okay. You look good.” Changbin replied, nodding at him.

“Really?”

“Really.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry this is superrrr long and kind of a lot of dialogue so i'm not super happy with it but hey ho!!!
> 
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	13. Appetite, A Universal Wolf

◕◕◕

“Seung, I’m in the car, I can’t video chat, okay?” Changbin said, “You’re on loudspeaker.”

“Okay! Dad asked me to check that you knew that this week’s rehearsal was at the Theatre, not at school! After school on Friday and on Saturday, morning until lunchtime!”

“Yep, I know, Seung. Got it.”

“Okay, just checking! No—Jeongin, _I’m_ talking! Stop—” There was a sudden scrap, then a little fumbling, and the tapping of the microphone.

“Seung?” Changbin questioned.

 _“Fine!—_ I’ll see you later in the week Dad! And also, Jeongin wants to talk!” He said with a huff. “Fine! Let me hold it though it’s my phone!” He grumbled. 

He heard the little patter of another tiny voice whining behind as well as what sounded like Minho’s voice, tinged with annoyance, trying to move them along in to the car to get themselves to school.

“Hi, Dad!” An excited, little voice bellowed through the speakers.

“Hey Jeongie, you alright?”

“Yes, thank you. I have a piano recital soon, it’s next Thursday after school, can you come?”

“After school? I’ll try Jeongie, but you know I don’t finish work until six or seven most days. Can Dad watch?”

“No, Dad is at work too…” He said, his voice sounding quieter than before, and Changbin could only imagine the heart-shattering expression across his face.

“Well, I’ll see what I can do, maybe I’ll ask Grandpa to go.”

“Really?!”

“Yeah, if not I’ll work something out.”

“Thanks Dad! Love you!” The young boy beamed, and Seungmin muttered something down the microphone too, but it was too loud in the car to hear what it was.

“Love you, too. Have a good day at school.”

He heard the usual little, kissy sounds Jeongin usually made before he ended a call, followed by three beeps.

He took a deep breath, readying himself in the car. He pulled down the visor, checking how he looked in the mirror. Having Hyunjin staying over was a blessing and a curse; obviously, he adored his company, but he’d definitely been getting much _, much_ later nights… For, no particular reason…

He tapped at his puffy under eyes, trying to dispel them with his fingertips.

He had a corporate meeting with the head of the _Nova Seoul Centre_ today regarding their regular affiliation with them being halted, after they’d switched their main focus to the art exhibition against his Dad’s wishes. His Dad was heading the meeting and Changbin would add his own input, with Hyunshik there for support and financing matters. His sister, obviously, wasn’t interested.

They were essentially going to have to plead to keep their company connections, and Changbin was mildly terrified. _Nova_ was becoming a huge corporation, and his Dad was annoyingly, usually right about these kinds of things; not that Changbin regretted his previous decisions. They just couldn’t afford to lose an affiliate at this stage.

He parked up in his usual executive spot outside of the main reception hall, peeling himself out of the car and heading in up the steps. There was nervous energy filling the place, as he made his way to past the foyer reception desk. One of the staff wished him luck with the meeting and bowed to him as they entered the elevator, and Changbin bowed back graciously and tapped the button for floor 10.

As he nervously dipped his head in to the room, there were a group of around five or six men and one woman that he didn’t recognise all dressed in _Nova_ -colored navy, suits. His Father was already standing at the water cooler, slipping on one of the little plastic cones that seemed tiny compared to his hand size.

Changbin bowed to him, noticing Hyunshik was already sitting in his usual seat, dressed prim and proper as usual in a light-washed, grey three piece, his hair styled as it usually was. Changbin thought he preferred it when it was down, it looked shinier without all the hairspray.

“Shall we get started?” his Dad billowed, looking around the room. “Oh, where is Gudam? Does he not attend the meetings anymore? Getting a bit past it, is he?” His Dad chuckled, lowering himself into his seat, and Changbin followed suit.

It was true, _Nova_ had been run by the same man for the entirety of its’ run, but he was nowhere to be seen. Instead, another man came in, neatly kept, strawberry-blond hair and clear-plastic, round spectacles framing his bright green eyes.

Changbin froze up, the man wasn’t Korean. He was talking to an interpreter, who was relaying the information to them.

The meeting started, the target projections put on blast in front of their very eyes and then translated through two people, so there were bound to be some mistranslations. Hyunshik was nodding along, making notes, and Changbin had to keep trying to defend the company as his Father simply sat there and let him get verbally annihilated.

He tried his best to keep his nerve but having to have everything translated was making him seem less authoritative, he thought.

This must’ve been _Nova_ ’s globalisation plan coming in to affect. Changbin had prepared a rather sentimental defence for staying on good grounds with the other company. It was the ‘local business’ route, the loyalty of working with the company for nearly twenty years and the ties they both had to Seoul; both companies building from the ground up, in the same city.

With a new head of operations that wasn’t even _from Seoul_ , he’d started to panic.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it. I’ll take this, Changbin.” Hyunshik whispered to him, patting him secretly on the back behind him, spreading his fingers out and running his palm across his back. 

_“I’d rather think that Mr. Seo would know what he’s doing, considering he’s been working with Nova Tech for twenty years, Sir.”_

Changbin looked to him in confusion, as Hyunshik started having a conversation with the man _in English._ He looked back to his Dad, who tilted his head to the side, his eyes narrowing. He said a few sentences, sounding firm and poised, and although Changbin had no idea what he was saying, he could hear that he was confident in his speech. The other man seemed impressed with whatever information he was relaying.

The man spoke back and forth with him, both of them nodding in agreement, before Hyunshik turned back to Changbin.

“Changbin, do you think you’d be able to meet the projections if the target was raised to 24.5% in the next quarter?”

“That’s a ten percent increase… I mean, it’s doable providing we can get the mileage covered to reach more areas. What do you think? You’re leading finances.” Changbin responded, slightly perplexed.

“It’s questionable, in my opinion, but if _you_ think we can manage it, I’ll tell him that.” He said, smiling sweetly.

“Yeah, let’s do it. We can’t afford to lose _Nova_ to a competitor around Christmas time.”

“Alright, I’ll let him know.”

After some back and forth, the meeting had seemingly adjourned, and Changbin really had no idea what had even happened, but they’d managed to secure their ties with the other company… The men shook hands with Hyunshik and then him in tandem. Hyunshik was smiling brightly at them all, flashing his insanely white teeth. The man was so handsome and charismatic, he could probably convince a penguin to fly if he put his mind to it.

They all slipped out of the board room, finally shaking hands with Mr. Seo Sr, who was sitting proudly at the head of the table with a smirk across his face. Changbin turned back to Hyunshik, dumbstruck.

“Wow, your English? You sounded, fluent?”

“Ah, well, I am, actually.” He responded, nervously.

“That’s, awesome. I’m kind of jealous. You really saved our skin, there.”

“Thank you, it’s easy for me, really. I— I was brought up in England. Lived there for a long time but spoke Korean with my whole family. I’ve been in between England and Korea my whole life. I still served here, though.”

“Wow, your family must’ve had some money to bring you up in Europe.” Changbin retorted.

“Says you, Chang—Mr. Seo! You’re wearing _Prada_ overtop of _Prada_ , speak for yourself!” He chuckled, a rosy tint blossoming across his cheeks. “I am well-travelled, though. I really enjoy learning about other cultures. Anyway, I’m going to go and work on getting that mileage covered, like you said, Mr Seo. I’ll be in my office, if you should need me for anything else. I have lunch at one, if you wish to join?”

“Sounds great, I’ll try and make it.” Changbin replied. He’d gotten used to going out to lunch with Hyunshik by now, he made good company when Changbin was feeling down or over-worked, and he seemed to learn something more impressive about him every day.

He’d already found out that the man could play baseball. Which was something Changbin greatly appreciated, Seungmin and him often used to play baseball together, so it gave them some common ground. Then he’d informed him that he’d _self-taught_ himself sign-language and was well versed in computer programming and video editing.

“Hyunshik is, quite impressive, isn’t he?” His Dad said, across the table, snapping Changbin out of his thoughts as he watched the man leave the room.

“Sorry? Uh, I mean, yeah. He’s definitely fitting in here. He seems to take a lot of pressure off of me, too. He even offered to work Saturday night for me so I could enjoy some free time.”

"Interesting." His Dad said, shooting him a wink.

◕◕◕

 _13:12_ **Hyunjin** 💕:

i’m kind of mildly terrified of telling the guys about us on saturday

ngl they’re going to rip me to pieces

i might tell jisung first

just to give him the heads up

 _13:16_ **You** :

Why would it be a big deal? They must’ve known that something was going on between us?

Oh, wait, no they didn’t.

Because you denied it for months even though it was clear that you wanted me…

You’re lucky I stuck around, huh?

 _13:17_ **Hyunjin** 💕:

oh shush it, you

you would have waited for me even if i tattooed ‘i’m not interested’ on your forehead…

😇

 _13:19_ **You** :

I wish I could say you’re wrong.

But I’m a bad liar and you know what you do to me Hwang…

Do you want to come over tonight? I’m thinking samgyeopsal. x

 _13:20_ **Hyunjin** 💕:

hmmmm, probably can do, no rehearsals today.

plus how could is say no to samgyeopsal?!

i’ll finish at 6:00ish

 _13:21_ **You** :

Awesome, come over whenever, let yourself in, housekeeper is there.

Anyways, I’m at lunch with Hyunjin atm, I’ll message you after work, okay? x

*Hyunshik

typo

 _13:24_ **Hyunjin** 💕:

awh, always thinking about me, huh binnie? 🥴

 _13:26_ **You** :

Always! x

 _13:27_ **Hyunjin** 💕:

ew i was kidding you sicko

 _13:28_ **You** :

Miss you, too. x

*:･ﾟ✧

“Guess who has bibimbap for lunch courtesy of Minho, Mr. Hwang!” Jisung sang out, adding a little warble to the end of the word. All the other teachers had grown used to Jisung spontaneously bursting into song at any given opportunity, some reasonably impressed, but most of them just drowned it out.

“Save it for your neighbours, Sung.” Hyunjin replied dryly, tapping away at his phone. He lethargically sipped on his americano, needing a little bit of a caffeine before his last three periods. Tuesdays were his least favorite days; they were too close to Monday, for one, meaning the end of the week was four whole days away, and Tuesdays were when he had to teach three periods of seniors in a row. It was hell on Earth.

The only thing that marginally made it better, was getting a message from Changbin telling him that he missed him, making a tiny smile tug at the corner of his lips.

Jisung immediately bounded over, pulling the teacher’s lounge refrigerator open, pulling out his excruciatingly cute, little lunchbox in before headed over to their regular little table in the corner, dropping down into his regular seat and taking his regular own iced americano from the cardboard, cup holder. 

“Thanks for the—Wait, what’s got you smiling then, Jin? Who’re you messaging?” Jisung said, beaming at him from across the table. Jisung pulled the lid off of his excruciatingly cute, little lunchbox, reading todays lunch time post-it note from Minho, before chuckling and holding his hand to his chest.

Hyunjin tried to remain and calm and composed as he could, and totally not like Changbin just telling him that _he missed him_ sent a flurry of pathetic tingles down his spine. He couldn’t turn in to Jisung at a time like this, it was too humiliating to be _that_ soft…

“What? Oh, nothing. Just—” Hyunjin trailed off, in a total daze, glancing back to his phone.

“—Just…? Hello?” Jisung said, waving his hand out in front of his face, “Earth to Hyunjin?”

“Maybe I’m just happy as my promotion means I can actually afford rent _and_ coffee…?”

“Who is it? Come on, tell me, tell me!” Jisung teased, swiping for his phone across the table. “You know you’ve been quiet in the group chat, lately, c’mon, what’s his name!”

“You’re so irritating, Sung.” Hyunjin sighed, holding his hand out in front of him like Jisung was some little dog scrapping at a front gate.

“Well tell me, then. You know you’ll spill eventually. You can’t keep secrets!” He responded, slurping his iced coffee through his straw.

“I so can?!” Hyunjin retorted, in feigned offense, his hand across his chest.

“Like you didn’t tell Chan that I had that weirdly sexual dream about him, that one time!?”

“Okay, but that was _hysterical_ , you can’t just tell me that and expect me not to tell?!”

“It was one dream and I told you not to—!”

“—Hey, it’s nothing to be ashamed of, Sung! Sometimes we all just dream about our friends tying us up and—" Jisung suddenly leaned in across the table and slapped his hand over Hyunjin’s mouth before groaning, throwing his head back around the room to acknowledge the other teachers that were in the room, giving them awkward smiles to try and diffuse the situation.

“Anyway! What I’m saying is, you can’t keep secrets, you’ll tell me eventually…” He finished, pulling back into his seat and sighing.

He pulled his lunchbox open, placing the lid off to the side and snapping his chopsticks apart. He started scooping up some steak slices covered in gochujang and mixing it in with some spinach, tantalizingly offering some to Hyunjin across the table, probably as some kind of lure… He knew how much Hyunjin liked home-cooked food compared to his normal cuisine of microwavable meals.

He decided to take the bait, Minho really was a phenomenal cook.

“Okay, well…” he said, chewing down a mouthful of spicy meat and rice, “I was thinking of telling you anyway. Before I tell you though, you need to promise me not to freak out.”

“I promise?” Jisung responded, holding his hand up with three fingers outstretched in scouts honor.

“And it’s seriously not a big deal or anything…”

“So, it’s not a big deal, but you think I’m going to freak out? Sounds like it’s a big deal…”

“You know, when that, thing, happened between me and Changbin?”

“Yes?”

“And I said that I’d called it off...”

“Uh-huh?”

“Well… I kind of… I lied.”

“You’re still seeing each other?”

“Yeah, well, actually it’s... We’re more than that, now…”

“You’re kidding?!” Jisung shouted, totally absorbed in the conversation.

“No. I’m not. I went on… _Geez_ , it’s hard to say…” he grimaced, dramatically rubbing over both of his eyes at the sheer _concept_ of him having such a cringeworthy, romantic moment… “I went on a date with him; he took me to the _Museum of Modern and Contemporary Art_ , and it was, like the best date I've ever had… There was this kind of… Magical moment, I guess, and I kissed him. Then, I kind of took him back to my apartment.”

“Oh. My. God. _Your_ apartment?!” Jisung shouted in total disbelief.

“Look, I know what you’re thinking, and I know I lied and stuff but honestly I was just—”

“Hyunjin! What the hell?! I don’t care that you lied, I’m just, so happy for you!” Jisung said, slamming his hands down on the table in front of him, his eyes disappearing into his smile. A few of the other teachers in the lounge turned around at the commotion, making Hyunjin feel a little embarrassed.

“I mean, it’s your boyfriend’s ex-husband Jisung, it’s not exactly my smartest move—”

“—Who cares?! So, are you official?”

“Not _technically_ , but definitely exclusive… As in, he doesn’t look at other guys and neither do I. I mean… I’ve tried to, early on I’d go out with Channie and try find someone else to keep my mind off of him but it just… It’s not the same. I—I kind of…” He slumped back, combing his fingers back through his hair, exhaling, “I can’t believe I’m saying this but… I really like him, Sung.”

Jisung pushed himself out of his seat, his mouth agape, bounding over to immediately cradle Hyunjin’s head in his arms. He squeezed him tightly against his chest with his forearms wrapped around his neck, pulling him from side-to-side in a rocking motion. 

“Jin! I’m so proud of you for getting out there after all this time! This is incredible! Me and Changbin get on really well these days, plus we’ll be like, co-Dads?! This is amazing!”

“Jesus, that’s… Honestly Jisung, I’m kind of… I’m worried that I’m going to fuck it up but—”

“You won’t, and it’s fine to feel worried. It’s new for you, but I’m so relieved that Henry didn’t ruin all guys for you and you’re finally ready to date again! It’s taken so long. Now, I can _finally_ tell the Head of Humanities teacher that you’re off the table.”

“He’s gay?” Hyunjin said, quirking an eyebrow.

“Please, no one is _that_ into Greek mythology and straight!”

*:･ﾟ✧

“Everything alright?” Hyunjin asked, a little pout across his face that Changbin wasn’t actively giving him all of the attention he was craving.

They’d settled in for the night, opting to watch television on the couch after one of the most delicious portions of pork belly he’d ever had in his entire life. They were watching some quiz show, neither of them really watching. Changbin kept looking at his phone over and over, reading each message then proceeding to _sigh_ or _grunt_ at whatever he was reading. He could see from the name that it was his Dad he was messaging.

“What are you sighing at? Hyunjin asked, settling lower against Changbin’s side, gripping on to the shirt bunched up across his stomach.

“It’s just that Jeongin has a piano recital next Thursday after school, but Minho is working until 6:30pm and there’s no way I’d be out on time. I just asked him if he could watch him and pick him up, he’s making a big deal out of it for whatever reason. It’s not like he’s even in office anymore that much anymore.” He sighed.

“No offense, but your Dad is such a dick.” Hyunjin, wrapping his arm around the older man’s waist to relax his head on his lap. “I’m serious, what kind of Grandparent doesn’t want to see their grandkids perform?”

“Well. He’s always found Jeongin a bit…” He sighed, trying to find the words. “He thinks Jeongin is a bit behind, too passive. A bit too quiet to be a Seo, you know?” He reached his hand down, sifting his fingers through Hyunjin’s blonde locks. “Seungmin does really well at school, and he’s in a lot of the teams, Debate, Class Captain, Drama club, you know. He takes after me, according to my Dad.”

“So… What you’re saying is your Dad doesn’t like that Jeongin is just a regular kid?”

“Well, it’s more that… It’s… Jeongin’s _quiet_ , and Dad never really liked Minho in the years we were together. I feel like he kind of takes it out on Jeongin sometimes because he thinks…” He stopped.

“He thinks?” Hyunjin enquired, looking up to him.

“He thinks Minho is Jeongin’s biological Dad and not mine...”

“What the fuck?! That’s awful?! You can’t say things like that about your own grandkids?!” Hyunjin said, springing up from his position immediately.

“Yeah, me and Minho, we never really cared about that kind of thing or looked into it, we were always just happy to leave it unspecified.”

“Good! It doesn’t make a difference! Does he not know the emotional impact that’ll have on him?! Why are you not freaking out about that?!” Hyunjin shouted. "That's so out of line?!"

“Well, I’m kind of used to it, I’ve dealt with it for years. He’s just like that. We're not particularly close emotionally, it's just that I’m just the only boy in the family, so he _has_ to entrust me with the company, apparently.” Changbin said breathlessly, rubbing at the back of his neck and staring off at the TV with a blank expression across his face.

“Not because you’re just really good at your job, then?”

“Pah, not at all... I mean, it could be worse, it certainly used to be. My boys mean the world to me. If he wants to be that way, it’ll haunt him in the long run.”

“Changbin, he’s really awful, you don’t deserve to have to put up with that kind of shit all the time? It’s not fair.” Hyunjin replied calmly, resting his hand over Changbin’s, curling his fingers around his hand.

“I don’t? Hyunjin… Are you implying that, I’m actually a _good person?!_ A rare compliment, from the one and only, Hwang Hyunjin?” His mouth fell open as he tilted his head to the side to look at him in amazement.

“Wow, I’m sorry I even said anythin—!”

Changbin abruptly grabbed his face in between both of his palms and pushed their lips together, just to shut him up. It was annoying as all hell when he did that, but a part of Hyunjin really actually rather enjoyed it...

“Wh—”

“—Shh, stop talking.” Changbin whispered across his lips, smirking as he did. “You’re so much more attractive when you just, don’t talk—”

“—You did _not_ just quote _my own words_ against me.” Hyunjin said, totally caught off guard and notably offended. He pushed Changbin backwards with his palms and brushed his bangs back a little from where Changbin had messed them up with his hands.

“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t… What’re you going to do about it?” The older man teased, pressing his index finger into the sensitive spot just above Hyunjin’s stomach that made him flinch and writhe around, teetering on bursting out into laughter. 

“I’m taller than you, you know, Mr. Bigshot, you don’t intimidate m—”

Changbin suddenly removed his finger from his side and pushed him downwards with both palms, slamming him against the couch, pinning down his forearms, and a small gasp escaped Hyunjin’s mouth.

“What was that?”

“I can’t—I can’t remember.”

“That’s what I thought. Let’s get to bed, it’s late-ish.” Changbin said, before leaning in and re-attaching their mouths again. Changbin’s lips crashed against his like a lazy wave, slow and smooth in a languid rhythm as he cradled his face, a slight purple fog starting to wash over his vision.

Hyunjin broke the kiss, breathless, glancing across to the chrome clock mounted above Changbin’s fireplace.

“It’s not even ten-thirty…” He teased, pouting. He connected their eyes, and Hyunjin could see there was a little fire behind them, the imposing tension between the both of them that he knew too well. Hyunjin could make out his little chin scar when they were this close, it was strangely endearing, and he swiped his thumb over his cheek just to feel it.

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

They stared at each for a fleeting moment, before once again, he was unceremoniously hoisted over the shorter man’s shoulder…

Changbin waded through to the bedroom, and Hyunjin wiggled out of his clutches and slipped into what he was rather overly-affectionately referring to as ‘his side of the bed’ whilst Changbin dropped down on to the edge of his.

Suddenly, Changbin’s phone started ringing. He pulled backwards, reaching into his pants pocket behind him, pulling it out to check who it was.

“Who’s calling at this time?” Hyunjin questioned, propping himself up on to his elbows.

“Weird, it’s Hyunshik. I’ll be right back.” The older man said, tossing himself off of the bed and wandering back out into the hallway to answer it. Hyunjin heard his little _“hello?”_ as he strolled off out of the door.

Hyunjin rolled his eyes so far back he could see the veins at the back of his eyelids. This guy was going to really piss him off if this shit became a regular occurrence. Changbin was either stupidly naïve, or just plain dumb to not realise that his Dad had sent this guy his way for a reason… He almost wondered what he looked like.

He figured he could capture Changbin’s attention back fairly easily, anyway, this guy didn't intimidate him.

Hyunjin quickly scrambled off of the bed in his absence and headed across to his mirrored dresser, removing his earrings and belt and placing them carefully on the side. He reached inside the closet, spritzing some of that black-bottled _Versace_ aftershave just below his collarbones, dabbing it in with the back of his wrist. It complimented Changbin’s smell; sandalwood and peaches and a tiny hint of elderflower.

He glanced into his reflection, quickly unbuttoning two buttons, before being _not quite_ happy with the overall look; instead deciding on _three_ buttons, opening the material to expose his smooth chest. He saw a few stray strands of hair flying up so slicked them down against the side of his head, checking his face at each angle before crawling back on the bed, fluffing up the pillows with his hands.

He tried to think of the most sensual pose he could think of without looking like he was totally insane, which was basically just spreading himself out across the bed, jostling upwards to lean against the headrest with his arms outstretched over the back of the metal bar at the top.

“I’m gonna have to—” Changbin said, pacing back into the room, zipping up his black, leather bomber jacket over his chest. “What’s—”

“Oh, where are you going?” Hyunjin said, awkwardly shifting forward and pinning his shirt together with his fingertips.

“Hyunshik has managed to get himself locked in one of the studios at work... I need to head down with the Master key. I’ll be fifteen, twenty minutes, tops.”

“What? He’s at work, at this time?! Hyunjin retorted.

“Yeah, the guy does tons of overtime, it’s honestly insane.”

“You’re not going to leave me here?” He whined, a pout spreading across his face.

“Well, I’m hoping we’re past me being scared that you’re going to rob me, Hyunjin—” Changbin said, chuckling to himself whilst he patted himself down.

“—I mean… You’re going to leave me here, like this…?” He said, leaning across the bed, exposing his collarbones again, a knowing smirk starting to appear.

“You’re cute. I’ll be back soon.” He said with a soft, breathy laugh, wandering over to Hyunjin and planting a peck to his forehead before walking back to the door.

“Hopefully not!” Hyunjin teased, shouting after him. “The bed’s so much nicer this way!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apologies for the missed upload this week! i did say on my twitter that i wasn't totally happy with the chapter so i spent a bit more time trying to make it more tangible. plus i've been uploading like x2 a week since june and i was a little burnt out lol
> 
> but we back on the changjin grind!!!! 
> 
> hope everyone enjoys! <3 
> 
> twitter.com/YfwbbS


	14. Our Little Life Is Rounded With A Sleep

*:･ﾟ✧

“I’m off early Jin, have to watch Jeongin at his piano recital today as Minho can’t make it. I’ll see you tomorrow!” Jisung said, swinging his head in through Hyunjin’s open classroom door.

“Oh, I mean, I’m nearly finished up here, if you want me to come with you?” Hyunjin stammered, sliding some of the books scattered across his desk into his bag haphazardly.

“You? I mean, if you’re finished grading and stuff?”

“I’ll do it at home, I don’t mind coming.” He darted across the room, hitting the remote to shut down his projector whilst loosening the tie constricting his neck; he really did hate those things.

“Great, well it starts in ten minutes so... Get a move on!” Jisung sang out, his booming voice echoing throughout the hallway as he exited.

He had no idea why he wanted to see Jeongin play the piano. He thought maybe it was the idea that there would be no one there watching him, or Hyunjin’s own appreciation for musicality. 

Whatever it was, there was something about the smaller boy that intrigued Hyunjin, and knowing how badly Changbin’s own parents treated the youngest kid had him in his feelings.

He already _taught_ Seungmin, so they had common ground, but if Hyunjin was going to be introduced to them eventually, it made sense to get to know the youngest a little better if he could.

He figured he could take some video recordings of Jeongin to show to Changbin so that he hadn’t entirely missed out. As Changbin was a pretty emotional guy, he’d probably love those kinds of sentimental things.

He thought it was a nice gesture.

They made the swift journey across to the kids’ school; it was only across the road. Hyunjin hadn’t changed, simply grabbed his bag and Chromebook, and wandered on over in his school clothes. Luckily, he’d bought a chunky coat with his most recent paycheck; it was a thick parka, which admittedly wasn’t as bougee as he’d have liked, and it wasn’t branded, but he felt proud to have been able to afford it by his own means.

They stood around waiting with the other parents before one of the teachers came over and let them all into the auditorium. As they made their way in, Hyunjin recognised the place from when Seungmin had performed here on the same stage for his talent show.

They quickly took their seats, Jisung greeting a few of the parents that recognised him, it was, strangely wholesome. Hyunjin got the same usual _looks_ from some of the parents; mostly the Mom’s ogling him and unashamedly looking him up and down whilst their husbands rolled their eyes at the obvious display.

The kids walked in, all wearing their school uniforms and clutching various instruments to their chests; flutes, tubas, guitars, you name it. He saw the little girl with the black bangs, Yuna, from his class standing there happy with a violin in her hand, and a few other of the girls he knew from _A Midsummer's Night Dream_.

Standing off just behind, was a very timid looking, Jeongin.

Hyunjin watched him at the side of the stage, his little hands trembling, and his lower lip curled with nervous energy. He looked around the audience, trying to peer through the stage lighting, with a little pout on his face, probably looking for his Dad, or his shitty, terrible excuse for a Granddad.

It hurt Hyunjin’s heart; his chest constricting, to watch the little boy’s face scrunch up, his tiny brow furrowing as he scanned the audience to no avail, his music book clutched tightly against his chest. He suddenly clocked Jisung, and his entire face lit up like a beacon. Jisung immediately started waving to him, smiling his usual wide, heart-shaped smile.

Hyunjin found himself slipping too, giving him a small wave, the corners of his mouth turning at how cute Jeongin looked when he noticed Jisung.

They sat through the entire two-hour long recital. The orchestra did a few Christmas songs and carols as it was nearing that time of year, and there were a couple of solos, surprisingly, including Jeongin. Changbin hadn’t mentioned that Jeongin would be performing on his own, but as soon as Hyunjin heard him start his piece, he could tell that he seemed quite advanced for his age.

Hyunjin played piano too, being a theatre teacher, it was pretty much a given, though these days he’d let it slip, underneath the mountains of grading and paperwork he did. Plus, he couldn’t lie and say that going out and getting fucked up every Friday and Saturday hadn’t pathetically preoccupied most of his time. Passion for music and fine art had seared through his being since he was a child, and he felt some sense of _shame_ that he’d let his own creativity fester, rotting away under his layers of insecurity-induced nights out.

It’d been months now, since he’d even so much as desired to go ‘ _out, out’_ again.

Now, the only thoughts that were clouding up his mind, were the swirling, persistent visions of saving up to buy a new grand piano to replace his dusty, scratched keyboard with the missing C# key, and sitting next to Jeongin as they played piano together. Watching the little guy re-lit his desire to get behind the keys.

He was so enthralled watching how Jeongin finessed the piano, he totally forgot to even record him for Changbin. He was so immersed that it totally slipped his mind; he hoped Changbin didn’t mind.

After the showcase, most of the parents dwindled out in droves, heading towards the main back entrance, whilst other parents scattered into the classrooms to collect their kids.

“You did so well, Jeongie!” Jisung said, bounding over to him, waltzing in to Jeongin’s classroom after the show to help him gather his belongings. Hyunjin slipped in behind him, too, scanning around the brightly lit, colorful, border décor and children’s paintings all over the walls.

He saw the mermaids and the monsters painted in royal-blue and emerald-green acrylic, laced with yellow sequins for scales. The crudely cut-out, concertina snowflakes hanging from a single white ribbon across one corner of the room and covered in gold and silver glitter, shimmering as they twisted in the light.

Above the door, he noticed one single painting, a picture of three cats, drawn by _‘Felix, age 8, Woodpecker Class’_. Hyunjin smiled, walking over to it, and tracing his fingertip over the line art.

“Hyunjin, can you help take Jeongin’s music sheets.” Jisung asked, pulling him out of his daze.

“Sure.” He said, turning back around to meet the eyes of the littlest Seo. “Hi there, Jeongin. Well done, today.” Hyunjin said, smiling at him, leaning down to his height to accept the sheet music book from his tiny, clutched hands. The young boy looked up at him anxiously, whilst stuffing his two little paperback novels into his book bag, fastening the Velcro.

“Th-thank you, Mr. Hwang.” He gave a small bow, still slightly buckled to one side, towards the safety of Jisung’s radius.

“It’s okay to call me Hyunjin, Jeongin. I don’t teach you, do I?” Hyunjin said, wide-eyed, trying not to come across as too intimidating.

“No…”

“So, you can call me by my first name.”

“Really?” He said, looking up through his silky, black bangs, pulling a hand up to his mouth. He looked at Jisung, just to confirm that what he’d heard was correct, and Jisung simply nodded at him.

“Of course.”

“But Seungmin calls you—”

“—Well, this can just be our special secret, okay?” Hyunjin replied, sweetly.

“Okay… Hyun—Hyunjin…”

“Who’s your friend, there?” Hyunjin asked, pointing to his soft toy that lovingly sat on one of the royal blue, plastic, classroom chairs next to his assortment of school things.

“It’s Foximus. He’s a fox. He’s just a regular one but I have a snow one, too, and other foxes too. And Lego.” He said, his voice becoming a little more animated.

He ambled off across the room to the teacher’s desk, picking up two Lego men models of _Han Solo_ and _Chewbacca_ off of it, before wandering back over and hoisting them up in the air so that Hyunjin could look at them.

Jisung glanced at him, squinting his eyes a little, a knowing smile appearing. He almost looked _impressed_ , and Hyunjin was somewhat impressed at himself, too.

“Wow, that’s really cool, thank you Jeongin.” He responded, carefully taking each model.

“Let me get the _M-Millelellim_ —The _Millel_ …” He trailed off, suddenly appearing a little frustrated, looking to Jisung for reassurance with wide, glistening, doe eyes.

“ _Millennium_ Falcon.” Jisung repeated, enunciating each syllable, nodding at him enthusiastically.

“ _Mill-en-nium_ , _Falcon_.” He said again, and Jisung patted the top of his hair for him getting the pronunciation right.

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

“Maybe Hyunjin can come and see your Legos, some time, Jeongin? Felix has been missing Uncle Hyunjin, too!” Jisung interjected, pouting at him.

Jeongin looked back to Hyunjin again, pulling the _Millennium Falcon_ toy back against his torso, before looking him up and down, then slowly nodding. Hyunjin had never sought out the acceptance of a seven-year-old before, but for some reason all he wanted to do was gain his approval…

“Come on, Jeongie!” Jisung said, cooing to him, passing across his bag. “Let’s get going.” He shoved the model into his _Avengers_ rucksack before lifting it over both arms then clutching at a little lunch bag in the other.

What the hell was it with this family and their annoyingly cute lunchboxes?

They headed out of the classroom, Jisung’s hand against Jeongin’s back, guiding him affectionately through the corridors. They wandered back into the direction of the auditorium exit, more parents lingering around the place chatting waiting for the crowd at the doors to die down.

The atmosphere was enveloped in excited, festive energy, and Hyunjin secretly enjoyed how the parents interacted with each other here, it was different to the high school. The adrenaline of the performance seemed to bring people together here, it wasn’t like anything he’d experienced before.

As he peered around the room, something, or someone, caught Hyunjin’s attention.

He suddenly stopped functioning; feeling like the blood had been drained from his body. His heart started beating out of his chest, a sudden pang of anxiety flushing through his veins until he,

Stopped.

He stopped, dead in his tracks, making Jisung halt to look back at him and Jeongin bash into the back of him, apologising profusely, but Hyunjin couldn’t even hear him with the thump of his heartbeat ringing in his ears.

He watched the broad back of a man swirling and weaving their way through the other parents, a warm-toned, burgundy suit jacket disappearing out of the main entrance. All he could see was the side of the man’s neck.

He tried to peer through the crowd again, bobbing his head up and down, but the man seemed to have vanished before he had time to catch his breath.

He could have sworn, he’d just seen…

No, he must’ve just been tired, delusional.

*:･ﾟ✧

“There’s a piano in the boys’ room, you know? If you want to start playing again.” Changbin said, his arms resting over the back of the couch to look at him, whilst Hyunjin slid around the kitchen area, pulling each cabinet open looking for a dessert bowl. He peeked his head up, his mouth wide at the sudden revelation.

He wasn’t wearing any pants, as usual, opting to be as comfortable as possible whenever he was at Changbin’s house. He was wearing just an oversized white shirt, some red shorts and a thick pair of white socks. He’d recently found himself adjusting to ‘relationship’ life, electing only to wear Changbin’s shirts; he couldn’t get enough of the smell, and the way that Changbin’s eyes followed his legs around like motion capture made him feel good about himself.

“What?! You have a piano, here?” Hyunjin suddenly said, poking his head back up from the cabinets to look at him.

“Yeah, in the boy’s room. We bought it after Seungmin decided he was going to take singing and acting classes instead of baseball...” Changbin responded.

“How have I never noticed that?” Hyunjin replied, nonchalantly, slicing himself a rather large, fresh cream cake and immediately licking the knife clean, making Changbin wince at the action.

“Because usually when you’re here, you’re either in the kitchen eating the entirety of my refrigerator,” he said dryly, cocking an eyebrow towards him, “or, alternatively, in my bed…”

Hyunjin laughed, sliding his way across the marbled floor in his socks like a child in a grocery store, one foot after the other. He dolloped even more fresh cream into the bowl and made his way back across to the couch, holding the dish out in front of him, cupped in both hands. Changbin’s house had the best desserts.

“Counter argument, sometimes I eat the entirety of your refrigerator, _in_ your bed.” He teased, throwing himself down on to the other side of the couch, immediately hooking his leg over Changbin’s thigh, watching as the older man slid his hand over his kneecap. They relaxed there in moderate silence, just the sound of Hyunjin’s bowl clinking before—

“Speaking of Jeongin, and piano, maybe, you should come over when the boys are here. I want to properly introduce you, at some point?” Changbin suddenly announced. 

He looked back to Hyunjin, who’d stopped mid mouthful of cream cake, before slowly chewing it back down.

He saw the fear in Changbin's eyes, like he'd said too much, but surprisingly, Hyunjin actually agreed.

“Y-yeah, I think, that’d be like, fine. It’s whatever. I don’t mind.” Hyunjin said, looking back to him, some fear in his eyes, masked with enough feigned poise that hopefully Changbin would buy it.

“Wait, really? Aren’t you nervous about them finding out about us?”

“A little, but honestly I’m more worried about telling Minho and Chan on Saturday…”

“Don’t worry about it.” Changbin said calmly, stroking the outer side of Hyunjin’s thigh over top of his leg, feeling the smooth expanse of skin, there. “I can’t tell you how much it means to me that you went to see Jeongin today Hyunjin, even if you were there just because Jisung was.”

“Well, I wanted to support him, and I knew that you couldn’t watch him.”

“Actually, I did manage to see him, and he was utterly amazing, I’m so proud of him.” Changbin said, looking back to the television.

“He was, yeah… Wait, how’d you know he was amazing? You saw him?” Hyunjin questioned, leaning forward in his seat. 

“Well, firstly, he’s always amazing. And secondly, Hyunshik worked overtime yesterday so I let him finish early and I had no idea, but, he went all the way to the school and managed to get a video recording of Jeongin on his phone. Look he sent it to me.”

Hyunjin glanced over, and Changbin pulled _‘Jeongin_Piano.mp4’_ , up on his phone.

His palms suddenly started sweating, and his brow knotted in fury as he tried and ultimately, failed, to mask how irritated he was becoming every time Changbin mentioned this man’s name.

“Interesting. That’s so _nice_ of him, for him to do that in his own time. And how, exactly did he know which kid was yours? Isn’t it a little weird to have someone that you barely know filming your son?” He snapped, swiping his tongue around his mouth in annoyance.

“I’ve shown him pictures of Jeongin before, so he knows what he looks like.”

“Right…Of course you have.”

“Plus, barely know? Hyunshik’s great, he’s been a real helping hand these last few—”

“—Oh yeah, I’m sure he wants to give you a _helping hand_ Changbin. I’m sure he’ll give you as many _helping hands_ as you can go for in one night…” Hyunjin said, blowing his bangs out of his eyes in irritation. He slumped down, pulling his knees to his chest on the couch, pulling his white shirt over the entirety of his legs in a sulk.

“Okay… I think I’m picking up some sarcasm…” Changbin said, rotating himself to face Hyunjin.

“Oh, wow, incredible. I’m glad you picked that up, considering you _haven’t_ picked up the obvious fact that your Dad is clearly trying to pimp you out with this random, openly-gay guy who seems to have just _fallen into your clutches_ and who runs around after you like a fucking lap dog...”

“Hyunjin, that’s such a stretch. It’s the 21st Century, it’s not uncommon for my Dad to hire a ga—”

“—Your Dad doesn’t like me, so he’s trying to hook you up with some other rich dude. It’s obvious.”

“Hyunjin, you don’t even know him. We’re purely colleagues.”

“That you go to lunch with, and you pick up after work, and who heads to your kids’ school to record your son for you because he’s just ‘ _such a nice guy’!”_ Hyunjin jeered, fully aware of how pathetic he probably sounded but he couldn’t help it. How was someone older than him this _dense?_

“You’re being ridiculous…” Changbin rolled his eyes, placing his knee on the other side of the couch to shift down to settle on it. It went quiet again, but Hyunjin was already so fired up that he couldn’t stop himself from slipping back into his old habit of constantly needing the last word in any confrontation.

“And what does this guy _look like_ , then? Hmm? Bet he’s not exactly _Quasimodo_ , is he?”

“Well—”

“You hesitated!” Hyunjin screeched dramatically, lurching back with his hand over his mouth, throwing himself against the arm rest of the couch.

“Hyunjin…!”

“You hesitated?! He’s hot. Oh my God, he’s hot, he’s so hot, isn’t he?! I bet he’s like, the hottest thing ever. I bet he hired like, a fucking model or some—”

“—Jin… He’s—”

“Oh my God, you didn’t even deny it?! That’s it. He’s hot and you’re literally having him dangled in front of your face. I can’t—” He rose to his feet, flapping his arms around before circling his temples with his index fingers.

“Hyunjin, no one is hotter than you. You’re the most breath-taking human being I’ve ever seen.” Changbin said, rising to his feet too, and taking the younger man’s hands in to his own.

“Oh really?!” He snapped, looking down to him.

“Really! I still can’t believe how lucky I got when I found you.” Changbin said, dreamily. A content, relaxed smile appeared on his face, his eyes sparking as they looked at each other.

“…Stop it!” Hyunjin whined, throwing his head back, trying not to let the other man win.

“What!?” He laughed, gripping on to his hands tighter, making Hyunjin push back at his shoulders to try and stop him.

“You’re being all gushy because you know it’ll make me forgive you, but it’s not gonna work because I’m mad!”

“Oh, you’re mad?” Changbin teased, pulling him in towards him, wrapping his arms loosely around his waist as Hyunjin tried to fidget away.

“Yes.”

“You’re really mad?”

“Yes!”

“And would you still be mad if I told you that I’ve been restless all day at work, thinking about how long I had to wait until I could get home to see you?”

“Yes…” He said, throwing his head to the side, closing his eyes.

“And if I told you that you’re the only person that’s on my mind, 24/7?”

“I’m… I’m still mad.” He stammered, yanking his hands away and crossing his arms across his chest.

“And if I told you that every single time I look at you I’m reminded of how beautiful you are?” Changbin gripped his face, pulling him back again.

Hyunjin opened one eye stubbornly, looking back to the dopey man in front of him, finally exhaling.

“Okay… _Fine_ , but if I meet him at your Dad’s stupid retirement party and he’s hotter than me, we’re done, alright?”

“Never gonna happen. Statistically impossible. You’re the hottest man I’ve ever laid eyes on.”

“Hmm… Fucking prove it.” Hyunjin growled, lurching in and pulling him messily in to a kiss. The purple fog consumed him, and he tried to squeeze his eyes shut for a moment, appreciating the feeling of Changbin’s lips against his. He felt Changbin’s hands pulling up the back of his shirt, his hands gripping on to the back of his thigh, his nails digging into the skin.

Luckily today, Changbin had decided on a bridal-style carry, rather than throwing him over his shoulder like he usually did… Both of them giggling in to each others lips the entire way there. 

Later that night, after Changbin had essentially turned him in to a sweaty, writhing mess of oxytocin and dopamine that his neighbours likely had the pleasure of hearing through the wall, he’d decided to stay the night. His body was limply lying overtop of the older man, clutching at the silky material underneath him, wrapped up in contentment and sandalwood.

Their relationship had progressed to the point of Hyunjin having enough clothing items here to actually stay over spontaneously whenever he wanted. Plus, waking up next to Changbin’s warm, supple chest made the upcoming school day somewhat better, especially as he was feeling more and more uneasy as the days went on. In a few days they’d have dress rehearsals, and the time limitations had started to panic him.

Being draped in Changbin’s arms, comfortably settled in the calm, monochromatic surroundings of his bedroom, seemingly made things feel a lot better. He loved being here. 

It would've been perfect, and it should've been perfect. 

However, the warm, cosy night he’d imagined for them both, had swiftly shifted, deteriorating as the night went on. 

Hyunjin spent a large portion of his night trying his best to ignore Changbin obnoxiously responding to text messages until _1:30 in the morning_ , letting out the occasional scoff, or giggle whilst trying to keep his voice down. He was obviously assuming Hyunjin had fallen asleep, and that made things even worse. Hyunjin's mind was playing tricks on him, telling him that _he knew;_ _he knew_ who was on the other side of the phone. 

Hyunjin could feel his hands shaking in frustration, tears prickling at his ducts. He tried not to dwell on it, he tried to stay calm, he tried to not let his inner doubts plague his usually unbridled, self-confidence, but it was a lot to handle, especially for someone who didn’t have a lot of faith in other people to begin with. 

Even though this Hyunshik guy _clearly_ had less-than-innocent intentions, he’d grown to at least trust Changbin, and Changbin looked at him, differently.

He looked at him like he was the only person, ever.

All he had to do, was remember that, and try his hardest to drown the other man out.

He shook the feeling off, before it returned with a vengeance; as Changbin slipped out of the bed and exited the room, tiptoeing out to take a phone call.

◕◕◕

“Everything alright?” Changbin asked, leaning in over Hyunshik, who had his head in his hands, slumped across his pristine desk. “Your hair isn’t styled, so I figure you didn’t have time to—"

“—Yes! Fine! Yeah, everything is fine!” He suddenly perked up, jolting back at the motion. He started frantically wiggling his mouse across the mouse mat to wake up his screen. “And yeah, I just kinda got up and came immediately here.”

“I think, you really need to get some sleep, Hyunshik. You’ve been working a lot of overtime and every time you text or call me it’s really late at night.” Changbin said, his voice laced with concern. 

“I know, I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to be anno— I’m just, I’m sorry, Changbin.” He sighed, running his hands through his hair.

“It’s okay, but trust me; you’re doing incredibly well around here. You really don’t need to try so hard. Maybe take an early lunch, or a longer one today, my treat.” Changbin offered, patting him on the shoulder, gripping on to the padding of his blazer’s shoulder pad; or what he _thought_ was shoulder pad. Turns out, he really just _was that muscular._

“I’m going out with your sister for lunch, we’re running through the ESAS account, today.” He replied.

“Ah, what’s this? You’re ditching on our regular Friday lunches for my sister? Should I be offended?!” Changbin chuckled, warmly as ever.

“No, no! Not at all Changbin! It’s just that, your sister knows my sister, so we actually have been acquainted for a while. It’s been nice to get to know her in and out of work. Family means a lot, to me.”

“Your sister? You said… I mean, I don’t mean to pry, but you said that you’d been late a few times, because of… Your sister’s health?” Changbin asked, quietly.

The man’s head suddenly dropped, his mouth agape, looking like he was trying to formulate a sentence. Changbin felt awful, like he shouldn’t have even tried to pry; it was definitely none of his business.

“I’m sorry, if you don’t feel comfort—”

“—No, I actually feel very comfortable around you, you’ve made me feel incredibly welcomed, here.” He interjected, looking back to him and nodding. He took a deep breath, before continuing. “My sister had pneumonia twice last year, and at the time she was already very vulnerable. She’s had lots of sinus problems and ear infections since, and she’s also lost most of her hearing so it’s—”

“Wow, I’m really, sorry to hear that.”

“It’s okay, she’s on the mend, but she’s as stubborn as I am. She’s determined to get better; she just doesn’t know her limits and she pushes herself a bit too hard sometimes. She’s been struggling with signing, so I’ve offered to help teach her. It’s why I started learning to sign in the first place.”

Changbin was in awe. How could he have so immediately despised this man upon first impression, only to be unequivocally won over by him in such a short period of time? He felt like the world’s world person.

“It’s just a bit difficult sometimes. I want to make a good impression here, and not bring my personal life in to it, but…” He trailed off, dropping his head a little. Changbin heard a desolate, little sigh escape his lips.

“Our personal lives affect us all, Hyunshik. You shouldn’t be worried. I’m glad you trusted me enough to tell me.”

“Well, like I said. I feel very comfortable around you, Changbin.”

“I’m really glad to hear that.” He said, smiling brightly.

Hyunshik straightened himself up slightly, coughing to clear his throat to ease the morose tension in the air. He turned back in his chair, changing the subject to something more upbeat.

“Your Dad’s retirement party is next week; will your sons be there?”

“Oh, yeah, of course they will.”

“Well, I’m really excited to finally meet them! Did Jeongin like the _Millennium Falcon_ I got him?”

“Oh, he loved it! He never puts it down, honestly. It might be the thing that replaces that fox toy he’s been dragging around with him since he was three.” Changbin chuckled. “You didn’t have to do that; I know those sets are expensive.”

“A smile is priceless, though, don’t you think?” The man said, cocking his head to the side. “Plus, you said that your youngest has had a hard time recently,” Hyunshik looked up to him through large, deep brown eyes, “I thought it was a nice gesture”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next up, Seungmin's performance, then we're heading straight to Mr Seo's retirement party! stay tuned folks, thank you so much for reading along, bookmarking, leaving kudos and commenting, it really means a lot to me! 
> 
> also not @ me making jeongin have the same problem saying millennium that i did as a child asdoifskjf
> 
> hit me up on bird app if you want to scream about lino thigh with me: @YfwbbS


	15. Men At Some Time, Are Masters Of Their Fates

**PART THREE**

*:･ﾟ✧

“Okay, places, everyone! This is the last full dress run through, let’s make it count!” Hyunjin announced into the microphone, clapping his hands together. The sound of excited, fully costumed students started filtering through the returning microphones scattered across the stage.

He was sitting in the theatre’s audio booth, having previously run through the lighting system console with the employee of the theatre that would be running it for their two performances. It obviously wasn’t as grand a set up as he was used to, but he seemed excited enough to help out on his own. 

Hyunjin felt so fulfilled as he looked around, taking in the vast space around him. Everything felt so grand, so regal, in here. The rows of wooden pew-like seats, the proscenium arch, the burgundy, velour curtains edged with finely milled golden twine and tassels swinging freely at the bottom. It was like a fairy-tale.

He looked to the stage, Seungmin waving at him in his little white toga-piece and embellished fairy wings. He thought that Felix would be very, _very_ jealous of the little lights adorning them and the little bells that jingled as he walked. Hyunjin nodded back, giving him a little thumbs up.

They ran through the first act, pretty much without a hitch, bar a costume malfunction or two. The modern adaptation he’d created included a large mechanical water-feature at the back of the stage, with a projector beaming swirling, psychedelic patterns across it; and Hyunjin was utterly mesmerized with what they’d achieved. The Principal was going to be _so_ impressed, he felt giddy.

The moment that he saw Seungmin and the other fairies enter the stage, the lighting changed to a washed-out lilac, and a lavender mist weaved out of the machines at the bottom of the stage, a purple fog spilling out across the production. A little bubble of what felt like _pride_ , winded him for a moment.

Seungmin, one other boy, and two girls, including Yuna, (who’d become somewhat of a favorite of his, too) had been casted as the only ‘named’ fairies in the play; _Peaseblossom, Cobweb, Moth_ and _Mustardseed_. He was _Peasebottom_ , at his own request.

As far as little kids went, Seungmin really was phenomenal.

The rest of the younger kids were in chorus parts, but the ‘lucky four’ got a tiny line each, which they delivered with so much passion it nearly brough a tear to his eye before he realised how sappy he was being.

He beamed through the entire thing, proudly sitting through the whole thing uninterrupted. He made a few notes and pointers for the first act, but he was genuinely happy with how well they’d all performed. It was like the stage brought them all to life, he’d never seen them so passionate before.

" _The more I hate, the more he follows me!”_ Hermia’s actress called out, dramatically billowing around in her costume around the stage, one of the spotlights drawing over to her.

“ _The more I love, the more he hateth me!”_ Helena replied, and Hyunjin found himself dramatically mouthing along with the words in a stage whisper as he was so enthralled by the performance.

“ _His folly, Helena, is no fault of mine!”_

Hyunjin leaned back in his seat, exhaling, clapping into the microphone, totally taken aback.

“Okay guys, take five then the next act! I want to hear everyone’s voices from way back here!” Hyunjin shouted, before pulling his phone out to check the time.

It was 4:10pm, and the play would start at 7:00pm. More so, he noticed that Changbin hadn’t even messaged him once, all day. Usually, he’d at least get a ‘good morning’ text, or a ‘hope you have a good day’, text, or something.

But today, nothing.

He told himself that it really wasn’t a big deal, nothing to get shaken up over. Changbin was nearly the CEO of a company, worked long hours and was probably just tired. Plus, they’d been having late nights recently.

Even more so when he’d been texting and making giggly phone calls at ass-O’clock, conversing with some manufactured, overly-polite, probably model-esque, ‘ _nice guy’_ who’d been practically fucking handpicked for him…

Hyunjin was preoccupied with his own stuff, anyway... 

He opened up his messenger app, and typed something to him, hopefully nothing too over-the-top, but he couldn’t stop himself from feeling a little possessive.

* * *

sooo you haven’t texted me today

what’s up with that?

it’s last dress rehearsal and i’m stressed!!!

**🐷Binnnnie:**

Aww, sorry, Mr. Clingy, I’m doing company tax returns and debtor write-offs.

Dun, dun, dun… So fun.

Hopefully, it all went okay, today. I’m sure you’re going great x

/me/ clingy?!?! excuse you

🤨

and wow that sounds sooooo boring and means literally nothing to me

it was alright, although my Lysander literally split his pants and they were a rental

have you eaten?

**🐷Binnnnie:**

Yeah, I ate around 12.

We had a sponsored lunch with some of the people from Nova Tech today, we’ve been working with them really closely since that meeting. x

oh the one where whatshisface managed to save your asses?

**🐷Binnnnie:**

Hyunshik, and yeah, that’s the one.

wow that’s great

hahah yeah

him.

🙃

**🐷Binnnnie:**

He’s a nice guy Hyunjin, I’m serious. I know you get worried about that kind of stuff but honestly, it’s no big deal. I get it though, I was the same with Jisung before I got to know him.

You’ll get to meet him soon and you’ll realise we’re just colleagues.

You know you’re all mine. x

we’ll see…🙄

and ew can you stop being so cringe for like 2 seconds

**🐷Binnnnie:**

…Sigh

You said I have to dress up for this play, right? x

yeah! you have to dress up for the theatre!!

i’m going to wear a suit, with a paisley shirt

and some pennyloafers

**🐷Binnnnie:**

Is a shirt and tie enough? I don’t really go to the theatre often, or ever. Not really sure of the protocol…

yeah that’s fine

you look hot in a suit

i’ve let sungie and minho know, they’re going to dress nice too and they said felix even has like a little bedazzled tux

we’ll all go out for a celebration drink after

**🐷Binnnnie:**

What, with the boys?

i mean, i guess so

i didn’t mean like ‘out, out’

just one celebration drink!

you’re such a bad influence on me you, money-laundering floozy

**🐷Binnnnie:**

Oh stop it aha

Speaking of, you know Dad’s gonna be there, tonight right?

i’m prepared 😊

**🐷Binnnnie:**

Just, please don’t do anything too rash.

I know he’s been awful to you and I completely and 100% know that he upset you but I just really want you to be able to come to the retirement party with me and I just...

I just want an easy life, is that too much to ask…?

relax binnie sheesh you’re so dramatic

i’ll bite my tongue…

i’ll be an angel

**🐷Binnnnie:**

You’re the best.

Missing you, can’t wait to see you tonight. x

cringe

fine

miss you too………x 🙄

* * *

◕◕◕

Changbin hoisted his waistcoat off of the rack, holding it against his torso to check how it looked in the reflection of his office window. He’d stayed a little later, getting changed after work to meet Hyunjin at the theatre before it started.

He had Hyunshik take his card and buy him a plain white shirt and dark grey three-piece for the play, something expensive looking. The man had picked out a light-blue tie for him too, which was chunkier than he usually went for, but he considered that Hyunshik probably knew what he was doing. His style was more _work-chic_ and Changbin tended to go for more casual, relaxed clothes. He opted to wear it loosely, keeping the top button slightly undone.

He felt a bit out of his comfort zone, using a little makeup under his eyes and on his cheeks. He remembered what Minho used to do when they were together, just putting a bit of a darker colour on the outside of his eyelids. It clearly looked rushed and he felt kind of dumb, but he shrugged it off; if it made Hyunjin happy, it was worth it.

He wandered out of his executive room, waistcoat slumped over his arm, jingling around with the keys to lock it, before turning back to the reception area. It had gone 6:15pm, and Hyunshik was the last one here, _as usual,_ working away at his neat, little desk outside of the board room. His Dad was waiting down in the car for him, so he couldn’t leave him waiting.

“Wow, look at you! Mr. Bigshot!” Hyunshik chuckled, leaning back in his computer chair making it squeak as he got closer to the ground. He comedically whistled as he scanned Changbin up and down, giving him a thumbs up, eyes gleaming.

“Pah, thanks. It’s Seungmin’s big play, tonight. I was told to ‘ _dress nice’_!” Changbin scoffed, shaking his head from side to side. He pulled his waist coat around himself, fastening the buttons at his midriff before smoothing it down with his palms.

“Oh, that’s awesome, I’m sure he’ll do great. And yeah, I don’t think you can get nicer than a _Gucci_ three-piece, if I’m honest. Not to brag, but, I did good.” The man chuckled, glancing over his round, translucent spectacles, which were apparently, quite ‘in’ these days.

“Definitely, thanks for fetching it for me. How’s the make up?” Changbin asked nervously, shifting his face from side-to-side. “I don’t usually wear it, honestly I’m too old for—"

“The makeup, it’s… Nice?” He said, some doubt in his voice as he glanced at him.

“Why the weird intonation?!” Changbin scoffed, throwing his hands up in the air.

He knew he looked kind of dumb…

“I mean, it’s _okay_ , it could be better. It’s just a little messy, do you want me to fix it?” He chuckled.

“Uh, are you good at that kind of stuff?”

Hyunshik ascended from his chair, wandering over to him and squinting at his face for a few seconds. Hyunshik was a little taller than him, probably around Hyunjin’s height, so he did tower over him somewhat. For some reason Changbin noted how mysteriously dark his eyes were again, he really was a fairly handsome guy, quite chiselled, with a slightly squarer jaw and dark, distinguished features. 

Hyunshik pulled a packet of tissues out of his blazer pocket and wrapped his finger around one, dabbing underneath Changbin’s eyes carefully as he looked up at the other man’s request. He tried desperately not to tear up, but he couldn’t help his body’s own reflexes…

“Hold still, you’re going to make it worse!” He laughed, clutching the right-hand side of Changbin’s face with his cheek to steady him, leaning in closer for more precision.

“Okay! It’s better now, but… _Hmm_...” He pondered, shifting his jaw from side to side, making a clicking sound with his mouth.

“Normally, I have help with this kind of stuff, I’m not so good with makeup.” Changbin chuckled, suddenly feeling very judged, embarrassed about his own skills.

“Your hair, it’s too… _Done._ Let’s ruffle it a little.” He said, sliding his fingers through his bangs and shaking his hands to loosen up some of the stiffened product that Changbin had used. “Don’t you have like, accessories, or anything?”

“Well, I like silver, I have a few silver chains in my safe in my office, though I think they’re a bit more casual—”

“Take this, it goes with your powder-blue tie.” He said, reaching into his pocket and digging around for a few seconds.

“Powder-blue…? Is that a real colo—"

Changbin stopped in his tracks. The man had pulled out the most luxurious-looking silver ring he’d seen in a long time. It had thick set band, encrusted with a bluey-green stone, about half a centimeter wide.

“Holy shit, that looks—”

“It’s just blue topaz, it’s not _insanely_ expensive.” He said, rubbing the vivid stone in the middle with another tissue to buff it. He tried to put it on Changbin’s middle finger, but it was a bit of a squeeze, so he opted to place it on his pinkie finger, instead. Changbin stared at it in awe for a moment. 

“Here, put this on your lips.” He said, grabbing his chin, pulling a lip balm out of his seemingly never-ending pockets. He started swiping it across Changbin’s lip, a subtle artificial strawberry smell penetrating his nostrils and a waxy taste lingering on his mouth. The sudden contact made him flinch a bit, and it tickled slightly to have someone touch his mouth.

“I can’t say I usually put makeup on my lips—”

“It’s not makeup, it’s literally a lip balm! I think it looks great, you look really attractive.”

“Thanks, that’s—that’s nice of you.” Changbin said, slightly flustered. He bowed at the compliment, before suddenly Hyunshik’s hand was holding his chin firmly in place, again.

“I think… Your lips, they’re missing something, though...”

Changbin’s pulse accelerated, as he pulled his eyes up at the remark. Something in Hyunshik’s tone had totally changed the atmosphere, and there was suddenly an overwhelming tension between them. The other man’s eyes were piercing his, breaching their barely six-inch distance.

Before he could do anything else, he tightened his grip on his chin, pulling him forward and leaning in, connecting their lips in a hasty kiss. He kissed him with some force, pulling their faces together desperately at an angle before Changbin launched himself away.

“Hyun _ji_ —Hyunshik, what the fuck?!” He said pushing him backwards, making the other man stumble backwards, nearly crashing into his computer chair.

“Shit! I’m—I’m so sorry Changbin! I shouldn’t have—” He scrambled around, his hands all over the place in a frenzy. He turned his back to him, then forward, then back, then forward, mumbling under his voice in a panic.

“Holy fuck, no, you _shouldn’t_ have… What the hell was that?!” Changbin said, his mouth agape.

“I’m—I’m so sorry! It’s just, I thought you were kind of looking at me like you wanted me to kiss you?!”

“I was?!” He questioned, totally perplexed. “You can’t just go around pulling that kind of thing!”

“I’m so sorry! It’s just… It’s just…I don’t know?! You say that I look good sometimes, and you comment on my hair and stuff and you’ve been so kind about my sister and… Oh my—I’m so embarrassed!”

He pushed his right hand across his forehead, in total shock whilst he floundered. Changbin stared at him holding his chest to his palm, gripping on to the material of his shirt. He watched as Hyunshik fell back against his chair, his palms taking his weight before dropping his head to his hands. 

Changbin touched his own lips, looking down to the floor, his heart beating through his ribcage.

“I’m so sorry, Changbin.” He repeated, his voice shaken. “It’s just—It’s just that, when I found out you were gay, I was just happy to have someone that I could relate to here, and talk to about stuff and I just—I didn’t know you would be so _attractive_ , and you’re so successful and I just… I’m so sorry! I really stepped over the line and I’m such an idiot, I’m so sorry.” He said, his last few words faltering.

“It’s…! It’s okay!” Changbin said, trying to calm him down. “I just— It’s just surprising, I guess? I don’t know what to say it’s just…”

“I’m really _so_ embarrassed. Please don’t tell your Father what I’ve done! I couldn’t handle the shame.” He rose to his feet again, bowing incessantly, over and over. His eyes were sparkling, and he was gasping for air like he was about to collapse, and Changbin suddenly felt utterly awful for the man.

“I won’t, I wouldn’t do something like that—”

“I know he wants us to end up together, but now knowing that you don’t feel the same, I’m so embarrassed and I just can’t believe—” He said, trailing off, his fingers tightly pinched across his brow bone.

“—What…? What did you just say?” Changbin said, tilting his head to the side at the sudden revelation.

“I—”

“He told you, that he wanted _us together?_ _My_ Dad? My Dad, the serial homophobe...?”

“I mean, not directly but…” He started, his lip still tremoring. “He knew about me, my sexuality. He said that he had a son who was the same, and that he was warming to the idea, and he knows that it’s different nowadays and what you’d been through. He’s come to accept it, even though it’s taken him a long time.”

“He… He _said_ that about me?” Changbin stammered.

“He admitted to being ashamed of how he treated your sexuality in the past, but he knew that you were his son, and that he’d care for you no matter what. I—I never had that. I was pretty much kicked out and made to fend for myself and my sister when I was eighteen, and I just felt _welcomed_ here, once I saw how sincere he was about it all.” He turned around, his back to Changbin with his hands on his hips, no longer able to stop the tears as they fell.

He obviously didn’t want Changbin to see him in such a vulnerable state.

Changbin started to well up too, he’d never been able to watch someone else cry, and he’d never heard those kinds of words come from his Father in his life; directly or indirectly.

“Hey, come on. Don’t cry, I didn’t… It’s okay.” He said, reaching for Hyunshik’s arm, pulling him back around to face him, with some reluctance. “I can’t believe he said that… My Dad has literally never even slightly warmed to my sexuality in fifteen years? He always plays it off like it’s some _phase_ —”

“Yeah. Then he said, maybe… If I liked you, and maybe there was a chance that you liked me, we’d be like… ‘A successful couple’…” He brushed his tears away, trying to regain some composure as he stared back at him. “A couple he could be proud of. I mean, we’re not really so different, we’re kind of… _Lifestyle compatible_ , I guess. We both came from finance; we work in the same field… We’re both… Fiendishly attractive, you more than me.” He laughed, trying to lighten the mood a little, wiping over his nose with a tissue.

“You think… You think, I’m more attractive, than you? You’re out of your mind.” Changbin retorted, a breathy laugh escaping his lips. 

“So… You _do_ think… That I’m attractive, too?”

“I—I… I mean, that’s— That kind of goes without saying but… I don’t even know what to say. I’m in a relations—”

“—But, you’re _not?_ You said he never made it official?” He interrupted, looking back to him suddenly with such an intensity it made Changbin falter. “Oh God, I didn’t mean to say that… That's awful. Please don’t think that I came to this job to try and court you, or anything. It just so happened you were _more than_ I’d imagined and I kind of… Fell for you really fast. It’s honestly such an awful trait; I get far too attached too easily. I never really think before I fall… I wouldn’t imagine that you’d understand.”

“No, I… I kind of _do_ , understand, actually.” Changbin murmured, shaking his head slowly, trying to process the information obscuring his conscience.

“I must’ve just misinterpreted it all in my head… Sometimes I just make these _stupid decisions_ and I don’t think them through. You know? I guess, in the heat of the moment, you do things and say things you don’t mean and I’m just… _Totally_ rambling, I’m so sorry.” He placed his hand over the top of Changbin’s, pulling it towards him and squeezing it in his palm, bowing towards it again.

“Stupid decisions?” Changbin asked.

“Yeah, like, making decisions that maybe you hadn’t thought out, before because, that’s just what your heart kind of wants _, at that time_ , but in the long run it’s...”

“Are you…? Are you talking about Hyunjin…?” Changbin questioned.

“What?”

“You’re saying that I rushed into it with him, and I didn’t consider other options, or the _impact_ , or whatever?”

Hyunshik suddenly pulled back, putting his hands out in front of himself defensively, panic swelling up in his voice again.

“What?! Not at all! I would never! I don’t mean to disrespect you, at all! I don’t even _know_ your partner, I’m sure he’s great— But I mean, maybe, _you’ve_ been thinking that… Perhaps? Because it’s certainly not what I was implying.”

Changbin felt dumbstruck, a million different things circulating his headspace.

_Stupid decisions?_

_Not considering other options?_

And on top of it all he now had to see both his Dad, and Hyunjin, in person...

“I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable by telling you any of this. I can assure you I’ll remain professional at work Changbin. I don’t want to ruin anything between us, at all.”

“You… You won’t… I’m grateful that you told me, I guess. Anyway… It’s late…” He cut off and paced across the room, crashing his hand against the elevator button, summoning the escape route he so desperately needed to clear his mind. The air felt hot, and heavy, and he felt a bead of sweat glide down his neck, threatening to ruin his new shirt.

“I hope Hyunjin treats you well, Changbin…” Hyunshik said, his voice a little tender, this time. Changbin turned back to him, peering over his shoulder. “You work incredibly hard and you’re so passionate and caring and I hope you know that you’re a really good person… Plus, you have that, really cute little scar on your chin.”

“My chin?” He said, blinking in bewilderment.

“Yeah, you have a little scar there. I think it’s really cute. It’s like my favorite thing about you.”

“Your favorite thing about me...? I kind of, forgot it was there…” He said, words catching in his throat. “This has been… Enough for one night. Don’t stay here too late, okay?” He said, resolutely, before he heard the blessing sound of the elevator ‘ _ding’_ , and the heavy, silver doors gliding open. 

“I won’t. Have a good night, Changbin.”

His back hit the wall of the elevator, smashing his head against the buttons as the air in his lungs finally escaped him.

_What the fuck, just happened?_

One of the receptionists immediately rose to her feet as soon as she saw him, tapping against the floor in her little heels to hold out a _SEO-branded_ umbrella, bowing as he stumbled out of the elevator in a daze.

“It’s raining, Mr. Seo, here’s an umbr—”

“I’m fine.” He said firmly, dashing past her, desperate to get out of the door.

He swiped his key-card a few times, failing twice because his hands were so shaken and clammy; the fob just kept slipping out of his hands. He passed through the revolving door to a light rainfall, and his Dad’s vintage _Bentley Turbo_ Limousine waiting out front with the lights still on, and the engine running. He made his way around the car, shielding his hair from the rain, yanking the door open with all his might.

He launched himself in it, taking a deep breath as soon as his back met the warm, worn-in, white leather.

“I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” He said, pulling his seatbelt against his chest.

“Oh, it’s no issue, Changbin. I don’t mind at all.” His Dad responded, looking across from him in the other passenger seat. “What’s a few minutes, in the grand scheme of things?”

He tried to ignore the delicate blush his ears were persisently carrying, peering in his reflection against his window. He looked back ahead and managed to lock eyes with his Dad from the rear-view mirror, he had an expression across his face that Changbin couldn’t quite make out.

He ghosted his fingertip over the ring on his hand, gently touching the blue stone that adorned it, his hands dripping with sweat.

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin unceremoniously wiped his palms on the front of his pants, his hands were shaking, and he couldn’t just leave them in one place for too long. Changbin had messaged him that he was here over thirty minutes ago, but he still hadn’t seen him yet, and all he wanted was a good luck kiss before the show started.

He’d gone over to see Minho, Jisung, Jeongin and Felix beforehand, showing them to their designated seats at the front. Felix was wearing a tiny tuxedo, a gold blazer jacket and matching glittery, gold cummerbund, with a dickie bowtie to finish the look. Jeongin was in a simple grey, button-up shirt, and pants with a blue tie, clutching his _Millennium Falcon_ model against his chest, which apparently, he insisted that he brought along.

He couldn’t help but coo at Felix sitting on his knees in the chair, frantically waving to him from across the stretch of chairs, whilst he stood off the side with the pianist. Jeongin smiled at him too, mouthing ‘Good luck, _Hyunjin!_ ” at him, and something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted.

The tannoy belted out its' usual message once the hum of people filling the theatre was becoming deafening, all the parents and extended family members excited to see the performance. Hyunjin was still waiting in the foyer, arms crossed, listening to the message.

_“Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to tonight’s production of A Midsummer’s Nights Dream! Please note, the use video or audio recording equipment is strictly prohibited in the theatre. We ask that turn your phones to silent before the show begins and are conscious of our neighbours when you exit the building. This performance is set to begin in ten minutes, so please make use of our—”_

“—Changbin!” Hyunjin called out, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him aside in the foyer. “Why are you so late?!” He threw his arms around him, squeezing his cheek tightly against the shorter man's shoulder.

“I took Dad to his seat at the viewing platform before finding you. There’s something that I need to tell you—”

“There’s no time! God, I feel literally sick, I have butterflies in my stomach.” He said dramatically, tapping his forehead with the back of his wrist where the sweat was pooling.

“It’ll be great, I’m sure of it... You’ve worked so hard.” Changbin said, nodding.

“Come on.” Hyunjin said, frantically grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him forward, aiming for the side door.

Changbin suddenly pulled back, halting Hyunjin in his tracks. He turned back to look at him, as Changbin blankly stared at the ground, like he was possessed, or something.

“Hyunjin… What’s…” He stammered, before looking back to him. He licked his lips, re-hydrating them; they looked totally parched. “What’s your favorite thing, about me?”

“What...? What the hell kind of question is that?!” Hyunjin responded, totally confused.

“Well, I just… I want to know, is all.”

“You’re an idiot, let’s go! I need to give the pre-performance pep talk and you’ve made me late!” He whined, rolling his eyes and yanking him through the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sajfhgalskjf
> 
> sorry i know seungmin's performance was meant to be next but i did some re-arranging and this ended up being exclusively about changbin ha sorry about that!!! 
> 
> bird app: @YfwbbS


	16. You, Thief Of Love!

*:･ﾟ✧

When the curtain started to slowly ascend, the mumbled buzz of voices died down, as all the parents settled in to watch the performance as the lights dimmed.

All of the students gathered round and Hyunjin delivered a little pep talk to them all, trying to calm their nerves and tension. They all held hands and chanted a little pick-me-up, before the opening music started to play, some regal Palace music to set the scene in Athens.

The first set of actors headed out on stage, and everything suddenly started going at a billion-and-thirty-two miles per hour.

It seemed to be going well, the audience was laughing at the right times, and the lighting was making them _oooh_ and _aaah_ , just like he’d intended, and Theseus’s actor hadn’t messed up any lines yet, even considering how sizeable his monologues, were.

Hyunjin stood in the little walkway behind stage with the rest of the actors. He was watching the stage through a small monitor mounted on the back wall that showed the stage from a bird’s eye view so he could observe positioning. He had his headpiece in, nodding on each actor as they went.

It was nearly time for his favorite scene, _Act 4, Scene 1_ ; the Enchanted Woodland scene with Titania and the fairies. The purple fog started billowing out as she _ascended from the sky_ , some of the kids appearing on stage, twirling as they did. Hyunjin held his breath, and he heard the amazement from the audience, pride swelling up in his chest. He clapped his hands together backstage, before ending through to the kid’s prep room.

“Okay guys, it’s time, head on through, quickly, quickly!” He smiled at little Yuna, coaxing her through her nerves and escorting Seungmin out of the room with a comforting hand against his back.

He heard the _aww’s_ of the audience as soon as the fairies started delivering their lines. Seungmin’s voice was so clear and well projected. Hyunjin honestly couldn’t wait until he was a little older, where he’d be able to actually audition for proper roles, he’d be a shoo-in for any part he wanted with a voice like his.

He pointed out across the theatre, his little scepter in his hand, shouting a loud, ‘ _Hail, mortal!_ ’, which coming from a 9-year-old, had the desired comedic effect on the audience.

The story progressed on, and Hyunjin sat through the actors dramatically squirting the prop bottle of love potion into the wrong persons eyes, and one of the main characters being literally turned in to an _ass;_ a literal donkey. It was madness on stage, and Hyunjin loved every moment of it.

Hermia’s actor swung across the stage spectacularly, over-exaggerating her rage at her lover falling for someone else, just as she should’ve, the audience laughing along at all the right times.

_“You thief of love! What, have you come by night, and stolen my love's heart from him?!”_

*:･ﾟ✧

After the performance, Hyunjin had gotten up on stage to give his own little bow, before gesturing to the tiny school band orchestra, and the lighting man, in true theatre fashion. The audience started to swell out, all of them squealing about how spectacular and big-budget the show had been this year.

He also noticed the Principal, who was beaming down at him, giving him a thumbs up from where he was seated.

He ventured backstage again, to a slathering of parents who were congratulating him and telling him how much their kids had enjoyed being taught by him. Hyunjin wandered around the room, commending each of the kids on their performance, and chatting with some of the parents who were singing his praises for the ‘artistic direction’ taken this year.

Hyunjin was riding on a high, feeling like he was on cloud nine.

“Uncle Hyunjin!” Felix shouted, his head zipping out of a box full of feather boas. An orange, plaited Viking wig sliding off one side of his head as he bounded over, jumping at him.

“Hey Bud!” He said, accepting Felix into his arms. The freckled boy pushed his nose in to his neck, then starting mewling at him, nuzzling into the space there and _kneading_ at his neck with his hands like a cat.

“Hyunjin. It was amazing, honestly. The stage, the music, the costumes. Everything was so great!” Minho said, smiling at him, Jisung attached to his side.

Changbin was standing just off to the side with Seungmin, helping him with removing some of the delicate features of his costume.

“It went so smoothly, Mr. Hwang! I can’t wait for tomorrow’s performance!” Seungmin exclaimed, appearing in front of him with his sports bag and his costume, now neatly hanging on a hanger.

“You were fantastic, Seungmin!” Hyunjin said enthusiastically, and before he could do anything else, the little boy’s arms were wrapped around his waist, his head nestled against his stomach.

“Wow! So, you cuddle Mr. Hwang in front of other kids, but not me, huh, Kiddo?” Changbin scoffed, his hands in his pockets. “What, am I embarrassing?!”

“There he is! _My boy!_ Very well done, tonight, Seungmin! _”_ Mr. Seo Sr. announced, sweeping into the dressing room, _Mrs. Seo_ shortly after him, standing just off behind.

Hyunjin’s heart suddenly dropped; he wasn’t expecting to meet Mrs. Seo until the party. She clocked Seungmin standing there, and darted forward to meet him, holding her arms out in front of her to gather Seungmin’s face entirely in her hands.

“Hi Grandma, Grandpa!” Seungmin said, eyes sparkling, his words muffled through the sounds of his cheeks being squished together in her palms.

“Wow, you guys came! Long time, no see!” Minho said, smiling at Mrs. Seo.

“Oh sweetheart, you know I wouldn’t miss it!” She said, beaming back at him. “How have you been, darling?” She grasped at Minho’s forearms, affectionately turning him around to face her head on.

“I’m really well, thank you, Yeongja. It’s great to see you.” He smiled in return, bowing as he did. He nudged Jeongin out from behind him, coaxing him forward with a palm to the middle of the little congregation. She quickly grabbed his face too, cooing at him and ruffling his hair, eliciting a little giggle from Felix, who was shuffling around behind them.

“Oh my goodness, Jeongin! Look at your hair, it’s so long! How have you been?” She shrieked, immediately leaning down to look at him, raking her eyes up and down him and clutching his tiny hands in her own before giving him a little peck on the top of his head. It made him a little shy, but he couldn’t hide the teeny smile that was creeping over his face. 

“I’m okay, thank you, Grandma.” He responded.

“And who’s this little one, hmm?” She said, turning to Felix, whose face immediately lit up at the invitation to the conversation.

“Hi, I’m Felix!” He said, waving at her and bowing a 90-degree bow.

“Oh, my, what a handsome young man, you are! And what a gorgeous little suit you have on!” She tugged at his lapel before brushing it down with her hand.

“Thank you. I put the glitter on the buttons myself, but Dad helped with the glue.” He said, nodding enthusiastically, turning to look at Jisung, who gave a little awkward wave, his fingers slightly pink and peeling from what looked like, a run-in with a hot glue gun...

Mr. Seo suddenly _spectacularly_ cleared his throat, coughing gutturally, all the way from his chest.

“Incredible. Still has time for _little theatre performances_ on the side of every other scholarly achievement. You’re really turning in to a fine young man, Seungmin. Depending on which high school Seungmin goes to, I’m sure there’ll be time for these kinds of extra curriculars outside of his core subjects.”

Hyunjin gritted his teeth at the implication that theatre studies weren’t considered a ‘core subject’, to Mr. Seo, not that he was particularly surprised.

“Well, whatever the boys want to do with their skills,” Changbin said, stroking Jeongin on the top of the head, “We’ll let them choose. And uh, Mom… I forgot to say…” He wandered across behind Hyunjin, gripping his wrist and yanking him forward a little bit. “This, is Hyunjin.”

She looked at him, her mouth opening a little, before looking back to Mr. Seo. She placed her hand gently across her chest, like she was confused, or surprised. Hyunjin suddenly got the feeling that he was about to be viscerally torn apart for every little thing about him, once again.

“Oh, darling, this man is _the_ Hyunjin, hmm? Well, goodness me… What a beautiful man! You could be a model, sweetheart!” She said, taking a large stride over to grab his face, too...

“Oh, no, no, I couldn’t, it’s—” Hyunjin stammered apologetically.

“Oh my, my son has a way of winning over the most handsome men, don’t you Changbin?”

“Mom…” Changbin whined, throwing his head back, ears slightly flushed.

The entire room went quiet for a moment. Seungmin tilted his head to the side to catch Jeongin’s eye, both of them nodding at each other with wicked grins across their faces, whilst Felix just stood there, looking totally confused.

Minho’s eyes rapidly widened at the realisation of what had been said. He looked between Hyunjin and Changbin quickly, before zipping back to Jisung who was pretending to be just as ‘shocked’ as Minho was, holding his hand to his mouth. Minho just rolled his eyes at his reaction; there was a reason Jisung never got into theatre despite his amazing voice; he was a terrible liar…

“Enough of this. Let’s go, Yeongja. We only came to congratulate Seungmin.” Mr. Seo interjected firmly, trying to take her wrist.

“Oh, stop it, Seunghun. I haven’t seen the boys for a long time!” She snapped, sighing at him.

She turned back to face Changbin and gripped his hands in between her own, leaning in to Hyunjin too. “Sorry darling, he’s been this way ever since his pretty little assistant quit, and I’m not surprised. Luckily for her, _she_ got out. I’ve been stuck with it for _37 years!”_ She joked, before shooting him a wink.

“Yeongja, the driver is waiting.” Mr. Seo snapped, impatiently, wandering across to the door to summon her over.

“Minho, wonderful to see you as always, dear. And Hyunjin, so lovely to meet you. I can’t wait to get to know you a little better!”

She kissed Changbin on the cheek, before bowing to the rest of the circle. They made their way out, not before Mr. Seo straightened his suit, looking Hyunjin up and down as he left, seething underneath it all.

“Well then! We’ll meet you guys at The Cherry Tree, we’ll grab a table on the lower floor.” Jisung said, kneeling down to help Felix slip his little, black, fluffy coat on, hooking the hood over his head.

“I want chicken wings!” Felix suddenly shouted, tapping him on the head as he zipped it up to his neck. “But not spicy!”

“We’ll see, Felix.” Minho responded, taking Jeongin’s hand and ushering Seungmin over, too.

“Sure, thing Sung. I just have to finish up with the audio guy and get the keys back to the theatre security team and we’ll meet you there.” Hyunjin replied.

“Yeah, good idea. Looks like we have a lot to catch up on, huh?” Minho asked, raising an eyebrow.

They all walked out, Felix and Jeongin waving at them. A few moments passed, before Seungmin suddenly poked his head back in through the door, stifling the volume of his voice.

“I knew it, you know.” He said, a smug little look on his face. “I always find out the secrets.” He tapped the side of his nose with his index finger, before disappearing at the sudden sound of Minho shouting his name down the hallway.

“Sheesh, that kid is smarter than me.” Changbin chuckled.

“Not hard, is it?” Hyunjin scoffed, before wandering across to a clothing rack, zipping away some of the costumes that some eager children had forgotten to clean up. He let out a long yawn, shaking his head and slapping his own cheek gently to bring himself back to life.

Changbin just stood in the door, hands in his pockets, following him with his eyes. He took a step forward, anxiously biting his bottom lip. He looked tense, just watching him traipse around the room.

“Do you want to take a picture, or something?” Hyunjin said, looking back over his shoulder as he folded a white shirt over his arm. “You don’t have to watch me all the time… I mean, aren’t you one of the ones lucky enough to be able to experience the real thing?” He teased, wiggling his eyebrows at him.

“Ha, very funny. I—I, I wanted to talk to you earlier. I didn’t realise that I’d get to see you so late but it’s… Kind of import—”

He was unceremoniously cut off by another rather large _yawn_ that escaped from his mouth, that Hyunjin couldn’t help but let out, he was really drained.

“Sorry… Am I boring you…?” The older man asked, crossing his arms firmly over his chest, his voice tinged with annoyance.

“Sorry, not at all, Binnie. I’m just exhausted.” He said, gathering his own things from one of the lockers. “You know, for once, I might get an early night. I was up all night, just thinking about _every little thing_ that could’ve gone wrong, tonight. Luckily, they all did so great.”

He placed his bag down over the back of one of the dressing chairs, and wandered across to the older man, placing his forehead against his shoulder, lying there contently, just breathing slowly into the material of his blazer.

Hyunjin could smell his rich sandalwood scent, with just a hint of peaches, but instead of the usual elderflower, there was the underlying scent of _something else._ It smelt kind of citrusy, maybe lemon. It was exotic, zesty, and enticing; he almost felt like he recognised it from somewhere… 

“I’m just so… I’m proud of them, you know?” He said, quietly.

“That’s… That’s really sweet of you, Hyunjin.” Changbin said, pulling back to angle his face back to look at him, his hand gently cupping the left side of his cheek. His hands felt gentle, warm and inviting, he almost felt like he could fall asleep, there.

“Ugh. Don’t mock me…” He whined into his shoulder. It’s—”

“I’m not, I think it’s cute that you’re proud of your students.” Changbin responded.

“Well, I think I’m a little high on adrenaline from the performance so I’m kind of feeling a little out of my mind, right now. A part of me just wants to crawl up in to bed…” He said dopily, lacing his forearms around Changbin’s neck to pull him in closer, staring at him with half-lidded eyes.

“Well, I wouldn’t mind that… Actually, it might be a good place to talk—”

“—Though, I’m sure once we get a drink and some food, I’ll perk up. I haven’t seen the guys in a while. Come on, let’s get these keys back and we’ll head there.” He tensed his arms, pulling the older man in even further so that their foreheads could meet. They kissed, their lips crushing against each other, at how tightly Hyunjin was holding him.

He could kiss Changbin for hours, days, nights, and never get tired of it. Not that he’d openly admit it…

◕◕◕

They slipped through the main entrance, Changbin’s fingers interwoven loosely in his. The Cherry Tree was a Prohibition-era-styled, cocktail bar with lowly-hanging, bronze lanterns and exposed brickwork.

The food was Latin-inspired, with an open Cantina displaying the Chef’s preparing the food, as well as live jive music softly playing in the background. On a Saturday night, it was buzzing, plenty of people filling up the tables. It definitely woke Hyunjin up a little.

“Jin! Over here!” He heard Jisung shout from one of the six person tables set aside at the side of the bar. There were only a few of the family booths left; it was getting pretty late for a couple of eight-year olds, but that didn’t stop Felix from banging his hands on the table energetically as soon as he saw him.

They were huddled around a little sharing platter of albondigas, nachos and chicken wings, without spice, of course. Jisung was wiping the copious amounts of barbeque sauce from Felix’s face, whilst Seungmin and Jeongin were scribbling on the little coloring sheets on the table with badly snapped crayons. 

“Well, aren’t you two a sight for sore eyes?” Minho said, slipping on his soda, tilting his head slightly.

“I told Jeongin that Dad was in love with Mr. Hwang, I knew it!” Seungmin said, closing his eyes smugly, puffing out his chest.

Changbin scoffed, shaking his head from side-to-side. He offered to take Hyunjin’s coat off but was met with the younger man shrugging it off his own shoulders, throwing himself down in to the booth.

“Do you kiss?” Jeongin asked, quietly, sucking his strawberry milk up through his straw, a little confused look on his face. “Grown ups kiss.”

“Oh my… Jeongin, enough of that. This is about Seungmin’s big night!” Changbin said, squeezing into the spot next to Hyunjin, opposite the other couple.

Minho’s eyes were boring holes into his skull, and he suddenly felt a little apprehensive. Not that it was any of Minho’s business, but Hyunjin had kind of lied about their relationship for a while so it was probably a shock for him. That was, if they were even _in_ a relationship, Changbin thought.

“No, no. I’d like to hear about you guys more!” Minho said, smiling at them both. “So, when did this all happen then? Before or after you guys said it _wasn’t_ happening?”

He gulped, rubbing at the back of his nape.

“I’ll—I’ll uh… Get the drinks in!” Jisung said, immediately shifting away from the slightly uncomfortable situation, sliding out of the booth.

“Jisungie…” Minho said, teasingly. “Don’t be dumb, okay? I’m just asking genuine questions.” He pecked the shorter man on the lips, before he scurried away to the bar on the opposite side of the room.

“Oh. Well...” Changbin started, acutely aware of all the little eyes on him. “Well, me and Hyunjin spent a little bit of time together at Seungmin’s rehearsals and—”

“—You fell in love!” Felix said, holding both of his cheeks in his palms, smiling with all his teeth on show. “How romantic!”

“Well… _Love_ is a bit…” Hyunjin started, causing Changbin to turn back to look at him.

“I mean, I’m kind of shocked!” Minho said, his voice still calm. “I really thought that it was just… A one-night _friendship_.” He said, careful of his phrasing with the kids around them.

“Well, that’s probably because Hyunjin told you that nothing was happening between us, right?” Changbin said, turning his head towards Hyunjin. “Because he literally denied it the entire time.”

He didn’t mean it to come out so accusatorily, but he found himself being a lot sharper than he expected.

“Yeah, I guess... I mean, I know we’ve had our moments, Bin, but I’m glad you’ve found someone who makes you happy.” Minho said affirmingly, nodding his head through the tension. “Didn’t take you for the relationship type, Jin!” He scoffed.

“Well, had to settle for someone, sometime, didn’t I?” He snorted, making Minho laugh in response too. “Gotta find someway of paying off that credit card debt, huh?” He joked again, and before he knew it, his entire evening was filled with Hyunjin and Minho making catty little jibes about him all night…

It shouldn’t have irritated him, and in normal circumstances, he could take it, but for some reason, he couldn’t tonight. He was even thankful when Jisung came back, so he could talk to someone normal, or at least, someone he _hadn’t_ slept with…

It was after Hyunjin’s third dry comment about how Changbin had ‘stalked him’ and how he'd 'finally given in', that he couldn’t take it anymore...

“Hyunjin, can I talk to you, for a sec?” Changbin asked, rising from his seat. Hyunjin looked up at him, perplexed, before spending another couple of minutes finishing his drink, agonisingly slow, which frustrated Changbin even more.

They made their way out through the back door, then through the smoking area and finally to where the kids’ play space would be set up during the day. There was a chill in the air, but Changbin was riled up, he barely even felt the cold, though he noticed that Hyunjin was shaking, after not bringing his coat out with him.

“Are you going to constantly belittle me, all night? Especially in front of my boys?” Changbin snapped, his teeth gritted.

“What? I’m not… Doing anything?” Hyunjin responded defensively, squinting his eyebrows.

Changbin held his head back, before placing his hands on either side of his hips in exasperation.

“Why do you act so differently with me when we’re alone, and then as soon as someone else walks within a two-metre radius of you, it’s suddenly the Hyunjin show?”

“What the fuck are you talking about? I didn’t know I was being any kind of way other than the way I usually am?”

“Well… It’s just… It’s a lot, sometimes, and it’s really exhausting.” He really needed to keep his cool, but he was so emotionally drained that he found himself pacing around the garden, turning his back to him.

“Okay… Well, shit. Sorry if my _personality_ has pissed you off?” He responded, grabbing his arm to turn him back towards him.

As soon as he looked at Hyunjin’s slightly confused face, he was reminded that this, was _his_ Hyunjin, the same complicated, charming Hyunjin with the delicate blonde hair and soft skin. He exhaled.

He was beautiful.

Too beautiful.

“Hyunjin… Look, I don’t know, maybe I’m just tired.”

“Do you want to get going? Sung and Minho can only stay for one drink, anyway, and I said before I’m pretty beat.” Hyunjin walked in closer, trying to put his arms around him, but Changbin found himself angling his body away to deny him.

He really wanted to say what he was thinking, and he needed to tell him what had happened that night. Hyunjin being affectionate with him finally after an hour of satirical comments and tatter, was clouding his judgement; fogging up his brain.

“Yeah, I think that’s probably a good idea… I’m getting myself worked up.”

“Is… Something wrong?” Hyunjin asked.

“You know what…” He took a deep breath, trying to compose himself. “Yeah. Something’s wrong.” He turned back to catch Hyunjin’s eye, who looked alarmed at the sudden revelation, tilting his head to the side a little.

“W-what’s happened?” He asked.

He needed to tell Hyunjin everything, but he was scared.

Too scared. 

“You were right.” Changbin announced, letting out a breath. The temperature had dropped even further, so he was hyper-aware of how erratic his breathing had become.

“I mean, that’s a given, but what about?”

“Hyunshik.”

“What…? What about him?” Hyunjin said, his words tinged with annoyance.

“He told me earlier, that, he has feelings for me. He’s got some crush on me, or something.”

“Oh. Right. _That_.” Hyunjin said, nodding. “Is this the part where I act surprised, or should I just give you this moment to relish in it, huh? I mean it’s not been exactly subtle.” Hyunjin scoffed.

“Please don’t be like that, I didn’t realise—” Changbin sighed, shaking his head at the claim.

“If you didn’t realise, you’re literally delusional, Changbin. It’s been so obvious this whole time. The only person who didn’t realise, somehow, was _you._ Unless you actually _did_ realise it and you were just, going along with it, to make yourself feel better.”

“Are you trying to say that I liked the attention? Isn’t that a little rich, coming from you?”

Hyunjin tilted his head, and Changbin knew he’d hit a nerve.

“Changbin… Seriously. Don’t start this—” He warned.

“I’m sorry if I didn’t realise my work colleague doing some nice things for me, was him flirting, okay? Is that what you want to hear?”

“Well, what did you say to him, when he told you, then?” Hyunjin said, his voice sounding a little bolshie. He crossed his arms over his body, angling himself away like he was going to have another one of his little Hyunjin-tantrums.

“That I appreciated his honesty, but I was in a relationship.”

“Okay… Well, good…” Hyunjin said. Changbin noticed that his shoulders had loosened slightly at the response, seemingly letting go of a bit of his tension.

“But then I realised, that _actually;_ I’m _not_ in a relationship. I asked you what we were, and you never actually told me that you were ready to be with me, properly. No matter how much I told you I’d wait. So, I guess, we’re not even in a relationship.”

“Oh my God, stop being so petty. We’re together right now, aren’t we? I mean for Gods sake I’ve already met your parents and your kids now?! We literally just told everyone about us?! Do we really need the formalities?”

“I guess, I just need the confirmation. You know, that you’re mine.”

“What, you think I’m going to run off with someone else, or something?”

“Well—” Changbin started.

“—Because from where _I’m_ standing, it sounds like _you’re_ the one who has someone else willingly lined up!?”

“Oh _please!_ You like to remind me that you have droves of other men that you could fall back on a literally any opportunity you can! The only time you treat me like I actually mean anything to you, is when we’re alone.”

Changbin heard the other man smack his lips, and suddenly a few people from around the smoking area started looking towards them, noticing the commotion.

“I haven’t said that kind of shit in weeks, Changbin. Do you even hear yourself? What, someone tells you they have a little crush on you and suddenly you’re second-guessing me? Do you have feelings for him, or something?”

“Hyunjin, that’s ridiculous. I don’t have any feelings for Hyunji—Hyun _shik_. Fuck, I meant—I don’t have any—”

The world stopped, for a moment.

Hyunjin’s mouth fell open.

Wide open.

“You fucking… You did not just do that… You did _not_ just do that.” Hyunjin said, immediately throwing his hand’s up defensively, he turned heel, storming off down the path towards the parking lot, his _Magnannis_ smashing against the concrete.

“Holy shit, no! I didn’t mea—Come on! Hyunjin, you have similar sounding names! Jeez, I’m… Fuck, I’m sorry it was a genuine mistake!” He paced after him, shouting his name out repeatedly, reaching for his arm. Hyunjin suddenly swung himself around, tears forming in the corners of his eyes.

“Wow, seems like _mistakes_ are pretty common with you, huh?! Case in point _, me?_ What a fucking mistake I’ve been this entire time. God, I should’ve known you’d find someone else _worthy,_ eventually.”

“You’re not a mistake Hyunjin, you've never been a mistake! And I haven’t found anyone else! Please, don’t be like this, all I want to know is that you want to be with me and—”

“—Why? So, if I _don’t_ want to be with you, you can just run away with your other choice and leave me on my own, like everyone else?!” Hyunjin screamed, his ears reddening.

“Stop being ridiculous! I wouldn't leave you! Geez, everything’s always about you, Hyunjin. You’re not the only one who’s been fucked around in the past, and here I am giving my everything to you and you can’t even fucking tell me what we are?! It’s always about _your_ insecurities, your problems, huh?”

Hyunjin stopped, throwing his head back in disbelief, letting a little _tsch_ out.

“And what exactly _are_ your problems, then? Hmm? Too much money? Too high a functioning member of society? Too easy a life with your great kids and your mansion? Oh, boo-hoo. So, I didn’t want to call you my boyfriend because I was scared of what it meant after I'd been fucking soured by relationships all this time, oh, what a travesty!”

“Well, excuse me for wanting to know and feel like that the man I’m _in love with_ actually fucking loves me back for once?!” Changbin screamed, his fists balled up, and suddenly the entire garden went deathly quiet.

“What…?”

“I’ve spent every waking moment thinking about you, even when you were desperately trying to push me away! Even when you said that you didn’t want to see me, I tried and tried, and I pushed, probably even harder than I fucking should have for the sake of my own sanity! You mean the world to me, and sometimes I just want to hear _something_ reassuring that shows you actually care about me back! One fucking thing, anything.” He said, pointing his finger at him firmly. “I need to know.”

“What the fuck is that…?” Hyunjin said, quietly. His voice was suddenly coarse, and dry-sounding. 

His face relaxed in an instant, and he went completely white, like all the blood had been drained out of his face. His eyes darted down to the hand pointing at him.

“What?”

“On your finger, what is that?” He lurched forward, desperately grabbing at Changbin’s hand, scanning over it closely with his eyes, running his finger across the stones in disgust.

“Why does that matter?”

“Where di—did you get… That ring?” He stuttered.

“Hyunjin? What? It’s just a fashion ring, why does—”

“I’m—I’m—I feel sick. I need to get out of here.” He said, taking a few steps back from him, stumbling a little towards the grass. His hands were trembling and Changbin could see him desperately swallowing the air quicker than he could draw it in.

He was shaking his head, from side to side. A single tear fell from his eye and rolled down his cheek, before both of his eyes started flickering shut. A few other people noticed to, and moved in to help him.

“Holy shit, are you… Hyunjin? Are you okay?” He asked, lurching towards him, grabbing his forearms to stabilise him.

He felt Hyunjin’s body slacken, becoming deadweight in his arms. His limbs weakening, before he fell to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is absolutely HONKING and believe it or not it was actually longer than this asdjfhaskjdfhsadf. the next one won't be so much of a sludge, i promise aha.
> 
> oh changbin, changbin, changbin. you really had to go and say the wrong name huh? you colossal buffoon! 
> 
> i hope you all enjoy the drama! come yell at me if not: @YfwbbS lmao.
> 
> also, thank you all for your comments and analysis! i really love it when people pick out stuff i've referenced from previous chaps and stuff! means the whole world to me. and thank you for 400 kudos too, feels amazing, thank you so much! 💜


	17. Upon My Soul, A Lie, A Wicked Lie

◕◕◕

“You sure you’ll be alright?” Jisung asked, lowering his volume a little.

“Yeah, he’s gonna be fine. I think he just worked himself a little hard, today.” Changbin said. “I’m sorry for all this trouble, Jisung. I know its way past the boys’ bedtime. I could see Minho seething from the car...” He scoffed.

“No worries, man. I’m pretty sure both of the boys have fallen asleep in their seats already. Plus, this one’s out like a light anyway.” Jisung said, gesturing to Felix, whose head was nuzzled over his shoulder. The tiny, freckled boy was swathed around his waist, his little arms draped around Jisung’s neck, whilst he snored softly against his skin. “Let me know how he is or tell him I’ll text him in the morning.”

“Thanks. Have a good night, Jisung.” Changbin responded.

He saw him out, giving him a little _head nod_ as he did, watching him mash on the buttons of the elevator outside. Changbin had worked out you had to hit it about three times with considerable force to actually get it to respond.

He closed the door, taking a deep exhale as he scanned over the room.

He’d placed Hyunjin down on the couch when he carried him through, laying him down on his side to ensure that he could breathe easily after his fall.

He made his way across to perch on the cushion next him, carefully loosening his tie and slowly prying it away, sliding it off under his neck. He took the earring he could reach out of his lobe, before carefully folding him back over the other way to remove the adacent one, placing them down on the coffee table. They were a set of silver _Tiffany’s_ earrings that Changbin had gifted him, and he wore them whenever possible.

He brushed a few strands of hair away from his forehead, his bangs framing his face perfectly. He never looked bad; it was impossible, Changbin thought. Not even with dirty smudges and grass stains all over him from when he fell.

He wasn’t sure if Hyunjin would want him to stay here or not, considering their fight, but he was so captivating, it made it hard to leave, in every sense of the word. He took Hyunjin’s hand in his own, gently stroking his index finger along the back of his hand, making him stir a little.

“C-Changbin?” He questioned, grumbling under his breath, eyes still closed.

“ _Shh,_ don’t worry. Just, sleep, okay?” He whispered, to which Hyunjin curled his body back over, nuzzling in to the into the dip of the couch. Changbin pulled a fluffy, grey blanket out of Hyunjin’s black ottoman in the corner of the room and draped it loosely over him, the younger man immediately pulling it tightly around himself.

He could probably just drive home and leave him to sleep, but he figured Hyunjin might be alarmed if he woke up alone, and the last thing he wanted to do was add fuel to the fire.

They’d have to talk tomorrow, and he knew it, but right now, he just wanted to be close to him. 

It was 10:30pm and already dark outside. He peered out of the window through a small opening in the blinds, watching the loose banners flapping around in the wind of the scaffolding outside of Hyunjin’s apartment. It always felt peaceful here, so high up and far away from the rest of the world.

He made his way into the kitchen and poured a half mug of cold water in to one of the home-made teal ceramics that Hyunjin had probably glazed at some pottery class. He used it to water Hyunjin’s small collection of houseplants, meandering around contemplating if he should carry Hyunjin to his bed. 

He decided to clean up a little for him, and started to re-organise some of the stuff that Hyunjin had scattered across the room. He carefully picked up the script he had scribbled all over with highlighters, and the numerous lighting rig plans, straightening them by tapping them together against the coffee table.

There were a stack of booking confirmations; the cameras, the soundcheck, the theatre, the staffing and ushers, as well as a dozen or so signed permission slips and two badly beaten up exercise books stacked up on the coffee table.

Changbin could tell he wasn’t kidding when he said he’d been up all night before the show; his apartment was way messier than normal, with tons of paper strewn across the room.

He was working himself to the bone, and Changbin had literally yelled at him on his opening night, all because of his own insecurities…

He felt awful. Truly, awful.

He decided to place some of the paperwork in one of the two wooden drawers, either side of Hyunjin’s TV unit, tidying them away for him. He pulled the little drawer open, shuffling aside the other things inside, a few remotes, a couple of coasters and some other stationary. Changbin couldn’t help but involuntarily snoop, he pulled out a letter, which was a noise complaint screwed up into a ball, as well as two overdue credit card statements dated from January.

He folded them back in, placing them back into the drawer, before something else caught his eye. Just tucked away underneath, there was a photograph, of what looked like a much younger Hyunjin. He had shiny, jet-black, short hair. Changbin had never seen him outside of a colorful beret or some kind of hair accessory in all the time he’d known him, but in this picture, he just had a plain black shirt on and a simple, silver hoop in one ear.

He almost looked like a regular, twenty-something guy.

He pulled it out, lifting it out and scanning over it; the picture was maybe ten years old, and slightly sun bleached, casting it in a slightly sepia tone in some parts. He raked his eyes over the younger version of him, glancing back over his shoulder to look at the sleeping man for comparison.

His fingertips ghosted over the lines of his face; it hadn’t changed, not really. He was still the most mesmerising person he’d ever seen. But, it felt strange. It was him, but not as he knew him.

It was folded in half, so he gently peeled the two sides apart, being careful not to rip at a little bit of tape that was holding a corner in place. He slowly opened it, revealing another person, a man, next to him in the image.

The world stopped, for a moment.

Changbin’s mouth fell open.

Wide open.

He instinctively dropped it in a manic moment, the photo fluttering down to the floor before he immediately dropped down to his knees and seized it in his hands again. It took a moment before he could look at it again, to confirm what he’d seen.

The man on the other side of the photo, with his face pressed tightly against Hyunjin’s cheek, was Hyunshik.

On the back of the paper, it had a little note written in _English_ , in red pen. Changbin’s knowledge of English was pretty limited, but he could make out what it said.

‘ _To my dearest Jinnie~ Forever yours, H. x’_

Turns out, he really _was_ fooling someone, and that someone, was Changbin.

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin woke up to the sound of one of his neighbours, suddenly blasting EDM loudly enough to physically vibrate through the walls of his apartment. He had no idea what time it was, but house music slammed through the walls at any time, be it morning or night...

He was lying on his couch, still in last night’s shirt and his pants, but his shirt had been unbuttoned a little, and his tie was lying on the table with his earrings. There was also a half-empty mug sitting on the side with water inside of it.

He peeled himself up and propped his slacken body up on his elbows, looking around the room, one eye still closed as the winter sun beamed in through a tiny opening in his blinds. Pulling his body back around, he rubbed his fingers against his face to find remnants of last nights eyeshadow, his face feeling greasy, like he’d been sweating in his sleep.

He lifted himself up, wading across the room and peering into the bedroom door to look for Changbin, but he wasn’t in bed; in fact his bed looked totally untouched. Then he knocked on the bathroom door.

“Binnie… Are you in there?” He asked, knocking again, before turning around in bewilderment. He cast his eyes across the front room and noticed his phone on the TV unit. He picked it up, turning it over to check for messages.

There weren’t any.

As he looked down, he saw a piece of glossy, crumpled-up paper which had been folded up and placed underneath of his phone. It was folded in to four, and his pupils dilated at the sudden realisation of what it was.

He’d taken Henry’s photo off of the wall years ago, and he knew he should have thrown the photo away, but for some reason he hadn’t found the courage to really do it. It was the last photo they had together, that he couldn’t part with.

Changbin had obviously found it. 

He ran his hands through his hair, exhaling deeply. After having a whole fight about his _unique_ ways of showing affection, finding a photograph of his last boyfriend as a treasured keepsake, probably struck a nerve…

He tried to call him, tapping on his contact.

The dial tone rang, just once, before a message notified him that _there was no one available to take your call, and to please leave a message_. But it wasn’t Changbin’s regular voice mail message, it was the standard pre-recording that was usually set as default.

He decided to try and text, instead:

* * *

ok first, thank you for taking me home. i feel literally awful and my head is a mess

i’m sorry you had to find that. we were together a long time and i just haven’t managed to get rid of it and i know that sounds really awful especially after last night

and /about/ last night

i can think of nice things to say about you.

i can think of lots of great things about you actually

and when you asked what my favorite thing was about you

i know i wasn’t in the right headspace at that time because of the timing but

don’t have one specific thing

i just like all of you changbin

every single thing about you

i have another show tonight, but please please please call me before

i really want to make this right i mean it

x

* * *

The entirety of Sunday passed, and he never called, and the messages never even delivered.

He tried to shake the fear off, but he just couldn’t; it was so unlike Changbin to not contact him like this.

The argument they had must have genuinely upset him, and Hyunjin had made the whole argument about _him_ , as usual...

He felt awful. Truly, awful.

Therefore, Hyunjin had to spend the last night of his last show, tucked away behind the backstage curtains, checking his phone for any messages, any calls, any single semblance that Changbin was going to contact him. His mind was so vacant, he couldn't focus on anything else.

Luckily, the tears that were falling were successfully masked as _proud tears_ , as even the Principal commented on how truly _devoted_ he was to his job, and the kids he taught. _Why, he was literally in tears, beaming with pride!_

Something inside of Hyunjin’s heart twisted; as he stared off across the audience, he realised, somewhere along the line, he'd fallen in love with Changbin.

◕◕◕

Changbin’s Dad veered through the main door of the board room, his regular briefcase swinging in behind him like always. He was slightly startled by the unusual sight of Changbin, sitting down typing at one side of the board table, his shirt unbuttoned at the top and barely even ironed.

He was probably surprised to see him sitting in his seat at the head of the table at 8:00am when he usually didn’t start work until at least 9:00am.

“Changbin, you’re here early…” He said, cocking his head to the side. He pushed the door close with a little _click,_ before wandering over to look over his shoulder to see what he was working on.

“Yeah, I couldn’t sleep last night so I just came in as early as I could. I’ve probably been here since like, 6am? Give or take.” He man said monotonously, his eyes bloodshot.

“Ah, I see. And where’s Hyunshik? He’s usually here by now—” He said, looking around the room in confusion.

“I— I fired him, Dad.”

“You what?!” He slammed his hands down flat on the desk, making Changbin flinch at the noise. “Are you out of your mind?! Since when has that ever been your call to make?!” The man boomed, shaking his head in disbelief.

Changbin remained calm, far too exhausted to even shout, anymore. He turned around to face his Dad, completely disregarding how bad he probably looked after having had next-to-no sleep and crying all morning.

“I fired him. I called him last night and I told him not to come in today. You were right, about Hyunjin, Dad…”

“W-what? What does he have to do with an-anything?” He stammered.

“He was fooling me, they both were.” Changbin said, looking up at him. “He knows him, Hyunshik. I found a picture of them together; they must’ve known each other this whole time, even before he was interviewed for the job, here.” Changbin sighed.

“Yo-you’re not making any sense, Changbin.” The man said, clearing his throat.

“Hyunjin and Hyunshik are together as in _, together._ The photo, it’s old, like they’ve known each other for years.” His eyes started twinging again, so he balled his fists up to dig his nails in to his palms to try and stop himself from crying. “All this time, he’s been mad at me about spending time with Hyunshik, he’s been faking it, all of it. How could I have been so fucking stupid?!” He said, slamming his laptop lid shut, jolting the table in front of him.

“Changbin, calm down—”

“No, Dad! You fell for it too! Look, I _know_ you tried to set me up with Hyunshik. He told me everything I wanted to hear; he was kind about the boys, he was so great to me, one of the _kindest_ people I’ve ever met. Weird how he knew that Jeongin liked _Star Wars_ , huh? And what school he went to?” You fucking hired him thinking I’d leave Hyunjin, for him.”

“Changbin… Firstly, your language…” The man said, at an utter loss for words.

“Well, jokes on you too, because he fooled you, as well, the whole time.” Changbin scoffed, rubbing his hands across his eyes in frustration. “I just… I don’t know _why_. I don’t know what there was to even gain from hurting me?! I didn’t even know either of them before this. Why would Hyunjin play me like that?!”

“Money, Changbin. It’s always been money, with him. It’s been obvious from the start...” His Dad responded, walking behind him and placing a firm hand on top of his shoulder.

“And Hyunshik? What was his motive then, huh? It’s not like he gained anything from this?”

“Probably just… As you said, in cahoots with him, or-or something.”

“God, I have no idea who Hyunjin even is. The man I thought I was _in love with_ , Dad. It’s all been…”

Changbin suddenly burst into tears, unable to hold it in any longer. His body slumped over the desk as he covered his face with his palms, tugging at his own hair on either side in frustration. 

“Changbin, come on. Don’t cry, son. Not over some nobody...” The man said, cautiously patting him on the back. “Why don’t you get yourself home, you’re not in the right frame of mind to be here.”

“You’re not serious?” Changbin sniffled, lifting his head up at the offer, wiping his tears away on his sleeve. It was an offer he’d never heard before. He’d made Changbin work through funerals, through the boys birthdays, holidays, all of it.

“You’re obviously upset, Changbin. You need to take some time off.”

“Dad… I’m—”

“My last day at the helm of this company is coming up in less than a week, and I need to know that you’re in the right headspace. You can’t concentrate when you’re like this.” He cleared his throat, trying his best to seem empathetic as he could. “And I know your Mother is better at this kind of thing than me, and I know you think I don’t care about you Changbin, but I… I do. I’m… I’m—Sorry, that it didn’t work out for you and… Him. Now, go on, get yourself out of here.” He said, awkwardly, like he'd literally never pardoned anyone in his life, which Changbin would probably believe. 

“Alright. Well, I’m going to go and check on one of the _Nova_ shipments that Hyunshik was meant to arrange today, and then I’ll head home, if that’s really okay with you?” Changbin asked.

“Of course, Changbin. In fact, maybe take the rest of this week off. It’s my last week as CEO, I’d rather make sure everything’s in order.”

“D-Dad, that’s… That’s too much, really I’m fine—”

“—I won’t hear any more of it, Changbin. Take the rest of the week off, I won’t ask again.” He said, giving him a raised eyebrow and the slight tug of a smirk.

Changbin smiled for the first time in a while, letting go of some of the tension in his shoulders and allowing his neck to relax.

“Thanks, Dad.”

He rose out of his chair, and threw his arms around him, unable to hold back. He felt him squeeze in return _just a little_ , before using his palms to separate them, pushing their torsos apart, uncomfortably smiling at the whole interaction.

It wasn’t a lot, but it was the best kind of response he could have hoped for.

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin couldn’t take it.

It’d been three days, and no word of Changbin. He felt lifeless, utterly drained after staying up all night thinking about him. He remembered back, how he used to tease Changbin for being so obsessed with him, now it felt like the tide had shifted, and the tables had turned.

He missed the feeling, the feeling of being with Changbin, that same lavender haze consuming him when they kissed, their late-night movie nights where they held each other until the morning peeked through; his mirrored closet casting the room in rainbow-patterns.

He didn’t know how it had happened. It was _one_ fight, and Changbin had endured worse from him before... But maybe that was the problem; maybe he’d pushed him one too many times, and this shove sent him tumbling overboard into the depths below.

Changbin had told him _he loved him_ , and he’d said nothing back.

He sat in his car after work, pulling his visor down to check the damage in the mirror. His eyes were puffy, they had been the entire day, even the students had commented on it. He’d even developed a little sore on one side of his eye from rubbing at them so vigorously.

He had no idea why he kept looking at himself, he knew he looked like shit, but the difference was, he didn’t care who saw now. The only person that he cared about his looks for, didn’t want to see him.

He pulled his phone out, shuffling around in his tiny car to free it from his pants pocket.

Still no messages.

He’d called Minho a few times, and spoken to Jisung about it during lunch, but they were none the wiser as to why Changbin was being so strong-willed about things, this time. Jisung was always an optimist, and he’d told him not to worry, and that he’d _definitely call_ , but that was two days ago, and now, he was _terrified_ of what it meant.

He stared at the time on the dashboard display, it was 6:00pm, and Changbin would more than likely still be at work. He knew where Changbin worked, because he’d sent him the location for his Dad’s retirement party on Saturday. It was only a few days away now, and Changbin had so desperately wanted them to go, as a couple.

He scrolled to their text with the pinned location in it and placed his phone in the holder on his dash, setting the journey there, it would take ‘ _roughly twenty minutes in current traffic’_.

He contemplated for a brief moment, before shoving the key in the ignition, and pulling out of the school’s faculty parking lot, taking a right, rather than a left like he usually would.

*:･ﾟ✧

As soon as he arrived at the building, he saw his Father’s name up in lights, ‘SEOCORP’. A large billboard of them stood proudly next to it, Changbin and him back-to-back, smiling proudly on it. It would’ve been something that usually Hyunjin would tease him for, he thought. The entire building looked huge, taller than even his apartment complex. He lived on the twelfth floor, but this building looked to be at least double the size.

He parked up, and wandered out, closing the door behind him with a _slam_. It was freezing outside in the December air, and he was only covered by a black blazer that he’d worn to work. He saw a number of the lights were turned off, and staff members were clocking out, probably finished for the day, ready to get back to their families.

Though, if he knew Changbin, he knew he would still be here, doing overtime.

He got to the revolving door, and awkwardly walked in to one of the open segments as another worker was leaving, the pompous-looking woman giving him a strange look as he walked around it.

Inside the foyer there was only one reception woman on shift, and the other reception on the other side had no lights illuminating it, with a clear Perspex sign across the front closing it off.

“Excuse me,” he asked, shimmying closer, and pulling his hands through his damp bangs to straighten them, “I’m here to see Mr. Seo?” He said, trying to sound self-assured.

“Senior, or Junior, Sir?” The smiley woman behind the desk asked, her hands hovering over the keyboard.

“Um, Junior.”

“Name, and appointment time?” She asked, moving her mouse around and looking to her screen.

Hyunjin shuffled around uncomfortably and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket to pull out his driver’s licence.

“Oh, I don’t have any kind of appointment, or anything. I’m Hyunjin, Hwang Hyunjin?” He said nervously, showing him the card, for some reason, as if it made any difference. “I’m Changbin’s… _Partner?_ ”

She accepted the card into her hand, looking at him and then back to him again, before looking down back to her computer and sighing.

“Oh honey...” She said, an awkward atmosphere washing over them, as her eyebrows dropped into an empathetic smile. “Unfortunately, I’m not allowed to let you in here, but I will let you know that whatever has happened, if you’d like to see Mr. Seo, he has taken a week off, but that’s all I’m allowed to disclose.” 

“You’re not allowed…? And wait, a week off? What for? Changbin has never had a week off in his entire life, what are you talking about?” Hyunjin snapped, acutely aware of how unnecessarily rude he was being, but he was just so frustrated.

“I’m not allowed to disclose that kind of information, I’m afraid. I’ve already said too much.” She said, bowing her head at him. 

“Yes, you _have_ said too much.” A voice boomed out, followed by the sound of expensive sounding hand-bound, artisan soles and a steel-cap, tapping across marble.

He turned around, to see Changbin’s Dad stepping out of the elevator, a large _Salvatore Ferragamo_ briefcase grasped in his left hand.

The woman started bowing immediately, and her entire face flushed red. Hyunjin desperately hoped she wouldn’t get reprimanded for telling him what she just did. 

“Come with me, Mr. Hwang.” The man said, peering at him over the top of his glasses, before wandering off slowly down the corridor.

Hyunjin followed, glancing at the cameras in the corners of the room and praying that there was one wherever he was going.

They wandered a while, and headed up one set of stairs, until the man stopped at a room named ‘ _Administration 3’_. He turned back to look at him.

"This'll do. Go inside."

"Why would I do that?" Hyunjin hissed, shaking his head at the older man, his brow furrowing.

"Because it will benefit us all, Mr. Hwang. Now step, inside." He pulled the door open, and swung his hand forward to gesture him in, and Hyunjin suddenly felt incredibly small under his gaze. 

Inside there were just two computers atop of two plain grey desks, a franking machine and two little, desperately shrivelled up philodendron plants in some hangers on the windowsill. There was one battered, leather, brown chair in the corner, which the man hinted to with a flick of his hand. He looked around, filled with apprehension, and slowly settled into the hideously gaudy chair, feeling how the material was peeling under his fingertips.

The man took a seat at the desk, before placing his briefcase down on top of it. He unclasped it, the expensive titanium latches making a clear ‘ _clack’_ sound as they swung open. He pulled out a little navy-blue book, and reached for a pen from the desk, sprawling something across it.

His hands were shaky, and he sounded out of breath. 

“What’s this?” Hyunjin asked, leaning in towards him.

“It’s a cheque.” He responded.

“I can see that but—”

“—It’s a cheque with your name on it. Name your price. How does 45 million won, sound? You can do whatever you want with it. All you need to do, is leave Changbin alone, and not contact anyone in my family again.” His words sounded a little slurred, like he was being rushed, or like he had somewhere to be.

It caught Hyunjin off guard, he could barely believe what he was even hearing. 

“You’re _blackmailing_ me?! I can’t believe this. You’re literally blackmailing me—”

“—I’d say don’t take it personally, but let’s be real with ourselves here, there’s a difference between the kind of family Changbin was born in to, and the kind you were born in to.”

“Right, because my family aren’t shameless, narcissistic assholes, I suppose.” Hyunjin clapped back, folding his arms tightly across his chest.

“You see, that kind of language is what—”

“—You really think you’re better than me. Well, you’re not.”

“Just take the money, young man. I’ll make it 50 million, just to get you out of my hair.”

He waved his hand so frivolously that Hyunjin felt his lip shaking, but he needed to stay strong. He blinked his eyes shut for a moment, aware of the stinging sensation building up behind them.

“Did you talk him in to this? Is this why he’s ignoring me? What have you done? Let me see hi—”

“60 million then! Whatever it takes!” The man suddenly snarled out at the top of his lungs, startling Hyunjin, causing him to fly backwards in his chair.

“Sixty million won…?” Hyunjin repeated in awe. He watched the man scribbling across the page again, frustration curling up his brow and his frown lines becoming even more deep-set. “You’re… You’re serious, 60 million won?”

“I’m serious. And all you have to do, is take the cheque, and not come back here again.”

He placed the pen down, and linked his fingertips together across the desk, looking him dead in the eye. His gaze was relentless, but Hyunjin could tell he was faltering underneath it, like he was desperate to keep Hyunjin away no matter what it took.

All he didn't know, was _why._

“He’s already ignoring me, why would you give me money if it’s already over between us, huh?” He asked. 

“Because my son is a fool in love sometimes, he can fall, _hard._ Even though you’re no good for him, he may be swayed, and I need to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

“So, you’re saying there’s a chance that he’ll—”

“—Imagine, all that money. That’s a sizeable deposit for an apartment of your own, money for a new car, go on your little dream holiday to Nepal, hmm? How about a trip around the world? You'd not take that amount of money, for the sake of a man you barely know? You’d be a fool, not to take it.” He said, rising from his chair, the legs scraping across the carpet. 

“B—But, I’m _in love_ with him...” Hyunjin blurted out, his head drooping down under the burdensome weight of how tense his heart was. His vision felt hazy, a pooling of red all around him, telling him that something was wrong, here.

“Be that as it may. Take it, or leave it, Mr. Hwang. It's your call.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so there's a lot of scene shifting in this so it feels annoyingly rushed to me even though it's like 5k?!?!? idek i'm a mess what's new?
> 
> i guess this is the build up to the main event!
> 
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


	18. Cry The Man Mercy; Love Him, Take His Offer

*:･ﾟ✧

Hyunjin stared at the cheque. The sheer number of zeros across the small sheet of paper made him audibly swallow, and a single bead of sweat trickled down his neck. He stared at the letter he’d just written out on the coffee table, a resignation notice from his job, effective immediately. He’d give it in on Monday, and walk out the same day.

He swore to himself that his next job, would be something he enjoyed. It would make him feel how running the play felt; that same sense of pride that he didn’t feel in his regular day-to-day job.

Jisung had gotten him that job after college, and it took him years to cement himself as a member of faculty there, rather than just some big joke. Trying to convince Professors that theatre was a _real_ subject was hard enough, but being ogled and scrutinized every day about the way he looked and dressed had taken its toll too, and he was ready to be done with it.

But, in saying that, he didn’t actually _need_ a job, right now.

He had sixty million won at his disposal, sitting pretty in between his fingertips.

He leant back in his couch, staring out over the vast expanse of the sky; the sun lazily setting over top of the adjacent apartments. He placed the cheque back down on his coffee table, and took a deep breath, before pulling his phone out of his pocket and checking for messages, one last time.

There weren’t any.

He pressed on the icon for his emails and slid his thumb down his screen to refresh them, updating the page. The top one was one from a travel agent he’d been in contact with. He wanted to take a trip, to finally see the Himalayas. It was a pipe dream before, but now, it was achievable on his own.

Under it, a spam email, probably from a mailing list, from the _Museum of Modern and Contemporary Art_ , about the latest exhibits.

He saw the ‘ _Rose and the Lotus’_ exhibit pictured on the top of the email, the lone man sitting with the English words sprawled across him, that he’d seen from his date before with Changbin. He felt his heart suddenly lurch, crushing pressure pressing and pushing down on him, making his chest hurt.

He remembered just how bewildered Changbin looked at all of it; asking him to interpret every piece, questioning the reasons behind the exhibitions and acting like he was interested in the displays. When really, all he was doing was watching Hyunjin the whole time _._ It was one of the best dates Hyunjin had ever been on.

But that didn’t matter, he thought. That was the last he’d think about him.

He noticed the English word, _‘rebirth’_ painted in red across the lonely man in the picture’s ribcage, and he started to tear up, his sinuses stinging. _It was his time, to do just that_ , he thought.

When suddenly, a text came through, from an unknown number. 

◕◕◕

Changbin straightened himself up, fiddling with his cufflinks. He was nearly finished readying the final preparations for his Dad’s retirement party tonight, with only twenty minutes until start.

Various staff ran around, arranging the _Fabergé_ table centre pieces and placing chilled bottles of expensive French champagne in buckets in the middle of each.

The tablecloths were all crisp and white, and a projector sprawled some words of _encouragement and good health_ across a sizable, white canvas wall at the back of the room behind them.

They’d aligned a large centre table, much like one you’d see at a wedding, where he, his sister, and his Mom would sit for their speeches, along with the other senior members of staff.

He felt a little nervous, and he also kind of looked like shit; bags upon bags under his eyes and his hair starting to stick up at the back in the humidity of all the lights in the room.

He hadn’t gotten much sleep since he’d consciously blocked Hyunjin out of his life, and even thinking about him gave him palpitations and made him sweat more. Which was, annoyingly more often than not.

He had to remind himself, _constantly_ , that he was doing the right thing. He wasn’t going to be played or walked over anymore, not by someone that had him on strings. Though, no matter how much he told himself he was over the chase, he couldn’t stop his heart from aching all the time.

He’d been working from home since his Dad gave him the rest of the week off, opting to continue working remotely on the party planning, to keep his mind pre-occupied.

There was no way he was going to get through this break up without taking his mind off of things, and since he’d fired Hyunshik, there was plenty to do...

His Mom walked through into the hall, greeting the staff enthusiastically as she always did. Changbin had wished so desperately that his Mom had a say in the goings on of this place, but she always opted to stay away from the family business, having her own side business instead. She was half a tailor, half a florist; it was sweet, honest work, and it was her passion.

Changbin only wished he had the courage to do something he was passionate about, like she did, as he laboriously tapped away at the protector settings.

She was wearing a flowy, ankle-length white dress, greeting the waiters by holding their hands in her own and bowing, as graciously as ever. Changbin noticed that she had a light pink, flower corsage wrapped around her wrist. It looked like the one that Hyunjin had worn that night at the museum, around his neck.

He remembered how incredible he looked in that tux; a tux that he was sure only Hyunjin could wear. Who else would be able to wear a flower as a tie and pull it off?

But that didn’t matter, he thought. That was the last he’d think about him.

“Darling!” His Mom called out to him, flouncing over to his side, and embracing him warmly. “You look tired, honey.” She replied, softly massaging the space under his eyes with the pads of her thumbs.

“I—I am, but the time off, it helped, at least.” He spluttered out. He did always find it hard to lie to his Mom.

“And Jeongin and Seungmin, they’re coming tonight?”

“Of course, Mom. Minho’s bringing them a little later.” He smiled.

“That’s wonderful, Sweetheart. Anyway, I’ve prepared some flower arrangements, for your Father, from you and your sister. They’re in the foyer, would you be so kind as to retrieve them?” She asked, smiling amiably, and clutching his cheeks in between her wrinkled palms. “They’re a little heavy for me, and the staff are already working so hard.”

“Sure, of course, Mom.”

“Thank you, Angel.” She said, releasing him, before heading back off to help in the kitchens, bowing to everyone as she did.

He turned heel, and wandered off through the main exit, the sound of his steel caps clicking on the marbled floor. He swiped his key fob through the doors as he journeyed, not a soul around. Most of the building was off limits by now but he had an executive key card.

He wandered out to the vast, foyer area. It was closed, with all the staff being allowed home early to prepare for his Dad’s party. It was half a retirement party, and half a celebration – a lot of the staff had taken plenty of shit from his Dad, and Changbin was going to be the ‘revolution’, according to the other staff.

He was going to do his best to run it with integrity.

The back entrance into the entertainment hall was being used for the evening, so it was strangely quiet in the foyer. Compared to normal, it was peaceful, even, with all the lights out. He flicked the lamp on at the main reception desk, just giving him enough light to see what he was doing, as well as the subtle, green tinge of the emergency lighting above the doors and under the desk. 

Changbin stared at the enormous bouquets that his Mom had provided, set out across the main desk. He was definitely going to have to make two trips... One, was a large bouquet of red roses, and the other was an assortment of Indian lotus flowers, tipped with a delicate soft pink with a bright yellow anther in the middle.

He leaned in, inhaling the scent.

“Changbin…” A gentle voice said, just a hushed murmur, and Changbin turned around in surprise, turning back to be greeted by none other than a sorrowful-looking Hyunjin, standing off to the side of the room with his hands in his pockets.

“H-How did you get in here? You shouldn’t be here.” Changbin said immediately, throwing his hands up either side of him.

“Your Mom, she messaged me, and she told me that she’d let me in to see you.” He said, nervously.

Changbin winced, before marching back towards the exit, shaking his head, making Hyunjin chase after him a little down the corridor.

“What the hell Binnie, why won’t you respond to my calls, or my texts or anything?!” Hyunjin shouted after him.

“I blocked your number Hyunjin, it’s the only way I could convince myself to not talk to you.”

“I messaged, you, like, a lot—!”

“Yeah, I knew you would. And I knew if I read them you might convince me I’m some crazy, obsessed—

“—Changbin! Look, I really do care about you. I’m sorry about that stupid fight!” He gripped on to Changbin’s arm, wrenching him around to face him with a surprising amount of strength. “You were right; I don’t always show you that I care about you but… The photo you found, it’s just… We were together a long time and it’s…” He started babbling frantically, trying to say something that might convince he was being genuine. “I just haven’t managed to get rid of it yet.”

“I don’t want to hear, about you and him. _Ever._ This isn’t about you for once, Hyunjin. This is my Dad’s night.” He said firmly, though he couldn’t quite bring himself to look him in the eye.

He turned back around again, to try and leave, but the emotional pull of Hyunjin was too strong. This is why he didn’t want to see him in the first place, it was always too hard to look at him.

“Changbin… I know, seeing that photo of us, after what you said the night before… It must have been really shitty, but I’ll get rid of it.”

“How long?”

“Sorry...?”

“How long?!” Changbin choked out, his eyes finally locking with Hyunjin’s, flaring with so much ferocity behind them he was sure he saw Hyunjin flinch.

“I told you, we were together for three and a ha—”

“Not _that_ , how long were you two planning this, then?”

“Planning… What are you talking about?”

“You and him. Is that why you never let me round your apartment at first? Why you would never let yourself be called my boyfriend? I guess you took that photo down thinking I wouldn’t find out, huh? It’s all just one massive game to you—” He thundered around again, trying to bring himself to walk away.

“Changbin, what the hell are you talking about?” Hyunjin responded defensively, his eyebrows furrowing at the accusation.

“Don’t play dumb, Hyunjin.” He said, surging back around and pointing his finger directly at him. “I should’ve known how good of an actor you were. I guess I’m just a chump, once again. Did Minho and Jisung know? What is this some weird attack on me, or something? Please _at least_ tell me it was real at the start… The taxi, the museum… _Something_ , at least—”

He let out an exasperated sigh, pacing back across to the centre of the room to the desk. He threw his hands on his hips and dropped his head backwards, exhaling deeply in an attempt to try and maintain his composure, but he was faltering.

Hyunjin took another few cautious steps towards him, like he was some wounded animal on the defensive.

“Changbin, I’m not acting anything. What the hell is going on here?”

“It makes sense, the timing of it all... God, how dumb am I?” He pulled his head up, before his hands slumped down on the desk with a _slam_ , his head lulling forward as he almost _laughed_.

“Okay, you’re not just talking about _that fight_ are you…? Have I missed something here? What the hell is this about?” Hyunjin asked.

He tried to snake his way around to Changbin’s side of the desk, but Changbin instinctively put his hand out in front of him, creating space between them again.

“You, and Hyunshik, making a fool out of me this entire time, both playing me. He told me everything—"

“—I’ve never even met Hyunshik?! What the hell?” He exclaimed.

“Uh, hello? The photo? I fucking saw it, remember? ‘ _Forever yours, H’?!_ ”

“What’s the photo got to do with anything?”

“Don’t lie to me, he was literally in the picture!”

“Who was?!

“Hyunshik!” Changbin said, totally depleted, throwing his hands up in the air.

“Are you out of your goddamned mind?!” Hyunjin suddenly shrieked, his words echoing throughout the empty foyer.

It went silent between them for a moment as they stared at each other blankly. Changbin could see the confusion across his face; it looked so real, so genuine… Too genuine.

“No, but apparently _you are_ if you think I’m going to let you pull this shit on me again Hyunjin… I told you the last time, I’m not going to let you string me along.”

“Look, here’s the photo of me and Henry, okay, I’ll tear it up, I’ll get rid of it forever.” He replied desperately, reaching into the back pocket of his pants, pulling out the fated photograph, and holding it out in front of him.

“Henry?” Changbin questioned.

“Yes!?”

“Who the hell is that? Please don’t tell me there’s more, Hyunjin... I can’t do this right now.” He was trying desperately not to shout, not to cry but his frustration was seeping through. 

“Wait… What do you mean, who’s that? Who… Who exactly do you think this man is?!” Hyunjin asked.

“You’re serious? That’s Hyunshik! What kind of game is this?!”

“Uh… You tell me?! Because that’s _Henry_! My ex-boyfriend from when I lived in England!”

“From when you lived… In England?” Changbin echoed back to him.

“Yes! I told you I studied in Europe, and I met him there and he came back to Korea with me and we bought that apartment!?”

“You’re… You’re serious? Is this more acting? What the fuck is happening, here?”

“I’m not acting! That, is _Henry_ , okay, and look, the photo. It’s gone.” He grasped it in between his index fingers and thumb, ripping it cleanly down the middle, then turning it over to tear it once again down the cracks of the folds. He ripped it one more time for good measure, before dumping the remnants down into the bin next to the desk.

“That man, is Hyunshik. Don’t try and tell me otherwise, Hyunjin. You’re trying to make me think I’m going insane and it’s messed up!” He cried out, feeling totally defeated.

“I’m not doing anything! Wait… Just—Are you saying, _this_ , is the man that was hired by your Dad to work for your company? The man in that picture, was _the Hyunshik?_ ”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying?!” Changbin responded, totally unwavering.

Hyunjin floundered for a moment, his eyes darting all around the room in a blind panic as he took a few steps backwards.

“I mean… Maybe they just, look similar?” Hyunjin stammered, trying to rationalise.

“There’s no way, that’s him. I think I’d recognise someone I worked with for months?”

“Well, I think I’d recognise someone who broke my heart, Changbin. And that, _I’m telling you_ , is Henry.”

The younger man smoothed his hands through his hair, pacing back towards the door before wrapping around and walking back. He started to talk, then stopped, then seemingly battled with himself for a moment, before finally speaking again.

“Hyunshik, is Henry, Changbin. God, it all makes sense.”

“What?” Changbin dipped his head towards him, trying to catch his eye, totally bewildered.

“Henry. He must’ve taken the job here under a different name, that’s why you had that ring... Your Dad, he even tried to give me money to stay away from this place, probably because he knew I’d talk to you and find out what happened…”

“You honestly think—”

“—I know that sounds crazy, but I’m serious. Look at me.” He lunged forward, reaching for the older man’s face, pulling him towards him to lock their eyes firmly together. “Changbin. I haven’t seen Henry, or whatever he’s going by, in _6 years_. I had no idea he was working with you and I also have no idea why the fuck he’s using a different name. Unless he wants… To get to me…”

“Wait, you’re not for real?” Changbin said, pulling away from him.

“I—I am.”

“So, you’re saying, your ex-boyfriend has started working for me… Under a different name, to get to you…?” He repeated the words back, they seemed nonsensical falling off of his lips, but Hyunjin looked terrified, visibly, and sincerely, terrified.

“That’s… I think… Maybe. There’s no other explanation.” He stammered.

“Right, so if he was trying to get to you, why did he kiss me, and why would he tell me all those things—?”

“Why did he… What?” Hyunjin said his head snapping back up, suddenly reanimated.

“That night, when he told me he had feelings for me, he tried to kiss me, and I had to push him away.”

“Huh… And… You _strategically_ missed that point out, huh?!” Hyunjin spat out. “You let him kiss you?!”

“Hey, don’t get mad at me! He told me that you’d been playing me this whole time, he even showed me messages between you two?!”

“ _Like I said_ , I haven’t seen him in years! They were probably fake!” Hyunjin said, his tone twisting into something more severe. He took another step towards him. “So, what? You just _believe_ that, huh? After _everything_ we’ve been through, you just believe what someone you barely know tells you about me?!”

“He was in the photo, Jin! I didn’t know what to think! How the hell was I supposed to know that there’s two versions of _the same person?!”_

“What you should _think,_ is that you _know me_ , and when I tell you I had no idea about any of this, you should believe me!” His voice cracked, as he swallowed back whatever comment he was going to make, and Changbin’s heart suddenly tensed, feeling like it was being constricted.

“Hyunjin— I just, everything that happens, what everyone tells me all the time it’s… It’s hard okay?! I have people telling me that you don’t care about me, and how you’re using me, and when you constantly joke about me and tear me down all the fucking time it’s so—”

“Look, I know! I know that I’m not the most… Caring, or affectionate, type of person or whatever, but I don’t mean to constantly grind you down, it’s just… I don’t know, okay, it’s just who I’ve become, don’t think I don’t hate it too, because I do!” He shouted, wiping away a tear that fell without warning with the back of his sleeve.

“Well, you know what I hate?” Changbin replied, “being scared constantly. I’ve always been scared about losing you. Thinking that one day after _all_ of this waiting around for you, that you’ll just turn around and cast me aside me, like before. I’ve had to chase you, time and time again Hyunjin... And I’m just… I’m tired, okay? I thought, this time, I’d cut it off _myself_ , and save myself some more heartache!”

He leant his hand against the wall beside the desk to take some of the weight off of him, his legs feeling heavier than usual as he rubbed at his eyes with his other hand, trying desperately to process everything that was happening.

Hyunjin immediately closed the space, grabbing his hand away from his face and pulling him around.

“The first time I did that… It was because—Because, I was _scared too,_ about how much I was thinking about you. We’d only hooked up a few times and I couldn’t believe how much I was letting you in to my life, so I pushed you back. But you still wanted to see me, even after I was awful to you, and you took me on that date and… I’m sorry if I ever made you doubt how much I care about you, because _I do.”_

“This is all… This is crazy. So, what you’re telling me is that Hyunshik is, all of it’s been a ploy to... But you didn’t even know…” Changbin stammered.

“Forget about _whatever-his-name-is_ and whatever is going on, for just a moment.” He waved his hand in the air, fanning his face, trying to hold back his tears, his breaths thick and weighted. “I need to say, what I came here to tell you, and what I came here to tell you is that… It’s that…”

He swallowed again, and sucked a large breath in between his teeth, before exhaling it. He pulled Changbin’s hand against his chest, cupping it in his own palms, before looking back to meet Changbin’s gaze.

“I’m in love with you, Changbin.”

“You’re…”

“I’m in love with you, and I’m _sorry_ that I didn’t tell you that when you said it to me the first time. I was just shocked. But I do. I didn’t lie about not letting people into my apartment, and I’m not lying about Henry and I definitely wouldn’t tell someone that I loved them if I didn’t mean it. It’s true, I’m in love with you and I’ve—I’ve hated not seeing you.”

Changbin’s eyes dropped to the ground, his mouth anxiously searching for something, _anything_ to say, but his throat was dry. He was in a total daze, and Hyunjin let go of his hands suddenly and reached for his face again, yanking him back around to shift his focus back to him.

“All of this, it’s true. Henry is one of the most manipulative, deceitful people I’ve ever met. Why the fuck else would I _faint_ when I saw my _own_ fucking engagement ring on your finger, Changbin?”

“Your engagement ring…?” He looked at him, squinting his eyes, before a sudden realisation washed over him. “The blue one… Oh my God, Hyunjin… I’m—”

“—He wore it to scare me, and it fucking worked...”

“He was, always so nice to me… I—I didn’t know it was your ring, or anything, I swear. Fuck, I’m so sorry Hyunjin, I didn’t know what was going on!”

“—Well… Just… Don’t you _dare_ second-guess how much I care about you, ever...!” He yelled, suddenly bursting into tears, his voice disintegrating under the weight of his heartache. “I—I mean it! I would never do something like that!” He sobbed, his face contorting into agony, and Changbin lurched forward to grab at him, pulling his head in to his shoulder pad.

“Hyunjin, holy shit… Come here,” He fussed, “God, I’m so sorry!”

“Don’t ever walk away from me again, you… Utter, fucking id-idio-ot!” He sobbed, crying relentlessly into the shorter man’s shoulder, barely able to even get a full word out before each laboured inhale. They slumped down to the floor, both of their knees bashing against the marble as they held each other.

“I won’t, I won’t, I promise! I shouldn’t have ever believed any of it!” Changbin replied, tightly cupping the back of Hyunjin’s head between the space next to his ear and pulling him in closer. “I’m so sorry Hyunjin, I’m so sorry.” He whispered, over and over until it sounded croaked, before his own eyes were flooded and spilling over, his lip shaking at the broken man he was holding in his arms.

“Kiss me, p-please. I’ve missed you.” Hyunjin pleaded through broken sobs.

“I’m so sorry, I’ve missed you, too. So much.” Changbin obliged, threading his fingers through the younger man’s hair on either side and hurtling their lips together.

It was desperate, and both of their lips were dry and heavy against one another’s, crashing against each other’s in short, needy bursts. A persistent and ever-familiar purple fog started to wash over his vision under his eyelids, so that when he opened them, all he could see was Hyunjin, engulfed in a lavender haze.

And he was beautiful.

Changbin’s thumb swiped over the delicate tears across his cheeks whilst they kissed, Hyunjin gripping at either side of Changbin’s wrists against his face to stable himself and stop him from shaking. Before Hyunjin pulled back, their foreheads desperately draped against each other’s to feel as much contact as they could, as if they were making up for the agonising time they’d spent apart.

“Your Dad… He must’ve planned this. You know that? It can’t be any kind of coincidence?” Hyunjin sniffled. “I know it… I have proof.” He hesitated, before reaching behind him and pulling a cheque out of his back pocket, holding it up to him.

“That’s… That’s from my Dad’s chequebook, isn’t it?” He said, scanning his eyes over the _SEOCORP_ logo embossed on it.

“I took it… But only, because he told me that you were done with me, and I came here, and they said I wasn’t allowed in last time—I just, I came here to bring it back. I couldn’t take not seeing you, but he wanted to get rid of me.”

Changbin felt like his heart had been crushed again, at the realisation that this was _real_. His Dad really did have something to do with this, yet again. How many chances did that man need?

Changbin pulled on Hyunjin’s elbows, shifting him to his knees then lifting him up to finally find his feet, keeping his hands firmly on the younger man the entire time. He reached up to brush the bangs from one side of his face from where they’d stuck to his tear tracks.

“Hyunjin, I have to go back in there, and see him. How the hell am I going to face him after he’s done this to us?”

“Just, act normal. You’ve known what he was like, for a long time, Changbin. With Minho, with Jeongin. We’ll face him, together, when the time comes. I promise.”

“I know, I guess it’s just hard. I thought—I thought he’d changed… I didn’t know he’d do this kind of thing again… And again…”

“Get back in there, and take over that man’s company, Changbin. You deserve it so much more. I’ll be here, waiting, okay?” He said resolutely, pressing their heads together again. 

Changbin nodded against his smooth skin, before rushing back over to the main exit doors down the corridor.

“Oh, Changbin!” Hyunjin shouted, stopping him in his tracks suddenly. “When you asked what my favorite thing was about you… I thought about it...”

Changbin looked back to the main, still watery-eyed and cheeks stained pink with tears.

“It’s how you always smell like sandalwood, and peaches... And there’s like… A tiny hint of elderflower in there, too.”

Changbin ran back over, smiling at him. He immediately took Hyunjin’s hands in to his own, before letting go and sliding his hands over Hyunjin’s cheeks, kissing him once again.

“I have a company to inherit. Stay put, okay? I won’t be long.”

“Hopefully not…” He sniffled, wiping the back of his hand across his nose.

*:･ﾟ✧

We watched Changbin head out, the doors fluttering shut behind him, and suddenly it was quiet again.

He felt so much relief, like there was a tightly wound knot in his chest, finally picked apart. He buried his face in the bunch of lotus flowers on the desk, to try and calm his nerves, muttering ‘ _thank fucking God’_ into them, like they could understand his pitiful mumbles of relief, or something.

He slipped the cheque into the middle of the flowers, burying it enough for it to stand up, sticking out proudly at the top.

He bit his lip a little, envisioning what he could’ve done with it.

 _The Himalayas could wait,_ he thought.

He reached into his back pocket, to retrieve his phone; he had to thank Mrs. Seo, with all his being. He felt around for a while, and couldn’t find it. He must’ve left it in the car in his nervous little self-pep talk before he met her earlier. She’d given him a fob, to allow him entry in, after talking his ear off about how _charming_ , he was.

He walked across to the main entrance, swiping the fob, lighting up the tree little red lights, before the revolving door clicked, suddenly slackening. He pushed his way through, and it automatically locked from the inside. It was quiet in the parking lot out front, but he could hear the crowd at the other side of the building, a subtle, excited buzz in the air.

The wind was sharp and bracing, but it felt like pure _solace_ , and he had to stop himself from screaming out into the middle of the night in relief.

He walked across to his little car, pressing the button to unlock it and using his shaken hand to pull at the door handle.

“You look even better than I remember, Jinnie.” A voice suddenly spoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> every time i tell you these chapters are going to get shorter.  
> all i do is lie!!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
> 
> <3 https://twitter.com/YfwbbS


	19. And Robin Shall Restore Amends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW // some mild aggression??? or like, implied???

◕◕◕

“There he is! Now this, is the _true_ man of the hour!” Mr. Seo called out, as soon as Changbin came back though, having placed the bouquets just outside the banquet room, ready for the speeches.

He’d spent a couple of minutes in the bathroom, trying to cover the remnants of his tearstains and smooth out the creases in his clothes, but he was still fairly shaken up.

Everyone had congregated around the tables, mingling, and standing around with their champagne flutes listening to some pretentious jazz music softly billowing out of the speakers in the background. The smoke machines were blasting mist across the room, ‘ _setting the ambience’_ as his Dad referred to it as, or as Changbin referred to it as; ‘ _a choking hazard’._

He greeted a few of the staff who’d appeared in the hallway, with a hearty handshake, trying to maintain his composure. Some of them chatted about the lights, the music for the night, what was going to happen after Mr. Seo left and he stepped up, but his mind was totally glazed over, and he couldn’t seem to hold a conversation for more than a few minutes.

His Mom looked at him across the room as he passed through the crowd, knowing _concern_ in her eyes, like a Mother’s intuition. She immediately got out of her chair and wandered over to him, weaving in between the guests, and latched on to his face, like she always did.

“How did it go with… _The flowers_ , Honey?” She questioned.

He flashed a small smile back at her, all that he could muster, nodding his head before wiping the back of his nose with his sleeve.

“It went great, with _the flowers,_ Mom. I’m so glad that you arranged them for me.” He wrapped his arms around her, pressing his cheek tightly against hers. He felt the familiar sting of tears start to prickle again, as they held each other for what seemed like an eternity. He could smell the subtle tinge of dewy petals radiating off of her wrists and it felt _warm_ , like home.

“It’s no problem at all, Sweetheart.” She said softly, pulling back to cradle him in her hands again, “Can’t be letting them stay out there and wither away, can we? Not when they’re so beautiful!”

“Thanks, Mom. You really are the greatest, you know that?”

“Changbin. Your Father and I, we just want what’s best for you. However, _I’ve_ always said, that _you know_ , inside, what’s best for you, better than anyone else. Remember that.”

Mr. Seo abruptly stood up, rising to his feet, clinking on the side of his glass to draw attention to himself. Nobody really responded, instead throwing back the cheap, watered down champagne from the ‘ _complimentary_ ’ table at the back. Changbin was sure some of them were even hiding behind the smoke machines, out of sight, masked by the _‘ambience’_.

His Dad finally cleared his throat by loudly coughing and clattering a knife against the crystal of his glass, a little louder this time to the point where everyone winced at the sound.

“Everyone, I’d like to make a toast!” He called out, fanning his other hand to gather everyone. “Please take your seats!”

Changbin could see their reactions; the rolling eyes, the scoffs, the mumbles under their breath; they couldn’t wait to be rid of his Dad as their superior. It was such a bittersweet feeling pooling in his stomach.

He made his way across to the long, white table at the front, pulling a chair out for his Mom and sister, before dropping down into his own seat, positioned next to his Dad’s in the centre.

“Firstly, I’d like to thank you all for reaching this year’s December target early. We’ve dramatically increased our turnover, year-on-year, and all of our KPI’s have been met, early. It’s a good start, but don’t forget, it can always be better!” Mr. Seo shouted out.

 _It was supposed to be a joke_ , Changbin thought, but nobody really laughed.

*:･ﾟ✧

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing here?” Hyunjin asked, jolting in alarm, a sudden realisation washing over him.

Henry slithered out of the shadows, hands in his pockets, smiling the same arrogant smile he always did.

He looked exactly the same, other than having a few small lines around his eyes, and his hair pushed back at the front, held in place with some slimy gel, revealing his forehead.

“Wow, that’s a little intense, Hyunjin? After all this time, that’s how you greet me?!” He laughed, all of his teeth proudly on display.

Hyunjin found himself instinctively backing up against the car, his body so repelled at seeing him again, that he couldn’t help his fight or flight from kicking in.

“H-how fucking _dare you_ show up here again after all this time and start this shit again!?” He shouted, shaking his head slowly, his mouth becoming drier with every word.

“How dare I what? I simply took a new job back here in Korea, what’s the big deal?”

“And your fucking name!? So, what, you’re suddenly going by a _Korean name_ , now?! You utter psychopath...”

“Well, I’m _in Korea_ , and I’m _Korean_ , so, obviously I’m going to use a Korean name?” He scoffed, “Hyunshik’s my Father’s birth name. It means clarity, and honesty.” He replied, staring deeply in to Hyunjin’s eyes.

Hyunjin _laughed_ , throwing his head back against the metal, tears forming in his eyes again through the panic. He wanted to be quick, he wanted to be witty, but the shock of seeing him left him floundering with his words.

“You are so fucking out of line.” He scoffed, struggling to pull his eyes back down to meet the virulent ones staring back at him.

“What’s wrong? Don’t you like how much I’ve changed I’ve become in our years apart? I’ve done a little growing up; some thinking and some travelling, coming to terms with myself, you know?” He said, pulling his jacket open, like he was showing the hideous thing off.

“Growing up, huh?! Wearing some gaudy, tweed blazer doesn’t make you grown up, _Henry_. Growing up isn’t giving yourself a fake name to ruin me, once again.”

“Ruin you?! Come on Jin, you’re being dramatic. I know what you’re thinking, and I know I upset you, with what I did, and it’s probably really weird seeing me here, but let’s just try and be civil.”

“Civil?! You’re here trying to hook up with my boyfriend and then lying to him telling him that I’m still with you?!” He shouted out in frustration.

“Look, Changbin’s great, Hyunjin, he really is, but it was just one kiss…”

“You don’t have to tell me he’s great,” he snapped furiously, “because he’s _mine_ , I know he’s great and you need to stay the hell away from him!”

“He’s yours, huh? Well, I must admit, him finding out about _us_ before I got a chance to speak to you wasn’t exactly what I had in mind… But then again, I didn’t expect you hold to on keepsakes of us after all this time… It’s really flattering that you keep a picture of me in our apartment, Jinnie.”

“It’s not _‘our’_ apartment! It hasn’t been for years.” Hyunjin snapped back.

“Huh, and who paid for it, then?” He said, a smirk tugging at his lower lip.

The comment sent a visceral feeling through him, an emptiness that he couldn’t even respond to. Even after all these years, he still knew how to make Hyunjin feel like the most worthless person in the universe, like he meant nothing.

“Just so you know, I had no intention of courting Changbin, Jinnie. I mean, his old kook of a Dad wanted to hook us up, sure, but that was never my intention. The only reason I took this job, was for _you._ I knew I had to see you, again, so I sought you out.” He placed his hand against the car, and the noise made Hyunjin wince, as he dragged his palm against the metal.

His innermost self was screaming at him to _run_ _away_ , or spit in the man’s face. He wanted to thrash, to yell, to cry, anything. He felt like nothing but a defenceless little rodent in the mouth of a viper, every fibre in his body coagulating under his gaze. He spoke every word so nonchalantly; it was like he relished in messing with him, running him around in circles like he was trapped in a cage.

He swallowed.

“So, you w- _were_ looking for me? You took a job with Changbin, just to find me..?” 

“Jinnie, it’s been years, come on... People change. I was a stupid kid back then with more money than sense and I wasn’t ready to settle down. I’ve honestly changed so much since I’ve had time to focus on myself.”

“You’ve _changed_?” Hyunjin repeated, totally lost for words.

“Yes, Jin. I know this has all been a bit of a mess, but do you _really_ think I’d go to all these lengths just to find you if I wasn’t serious this time? I’ve been thinking about you, non-stop.” He moved in closer, tilting his head to the side in a way that could have only been invitational, and Hyunjin felt his pupils constrict and his throat suddenly close up.

“Well… I-I guess…”

“I’m serious Jinnie, let’s just think about this, yeah?” His tongue poked out of the corner of his mouth, as he leant in closer.

“Think about it…? Wanna know what I think?” Hyunjin asked, leaning in closer too, dangerously close. “I think your little _nicey-nice_ act doesn’t hold up too well when the person you’re doing it to already _knows_ you’re literally human fucking garbage.”

Henry pulled back, fire in his eyes. He swiped his tongue along his lower teeth with a _smack_ , before suddenly lifting Hyunjin's chin up with his index finger.

“My, my, Jinnie... Your vocabulary is as vulgar as ever. It always did _rile me up_. Changbin’s _okay,_ but it’s nothing like I feel whenever I remember kissing you. You’re indisputably the best I’ve had…” Henry scoffed, shaking his head.

“You’re _d-disgusting_.” He stammered, as Henry suddenly pulled his hand back, to instead brush the back of his cold palm against his cheek.

“So typical of you to end up with a man with kids, Jinnie, you did always love—

“—Don’t. Don’t you _dare_. I mean it.” Hyunjin shouted, stopping the other man in his tracks, slapping his hand away from his face.

“You _always_ loved kids, Jinnie… Guess that’s why you became a teacher, huh? Changbin told me all about how emotional you were getting about the kids you teach. So _cute._ ” He teased, moving back in again to swipe the pad of his thumb over the corner of Hyunjin’s lower lip.

He immediately pulled his head to the side, screwing his eyes shut.

“Stop it. Stop talking.”

“You remember, we spoke about it a few times, starting a family together? You said you wanted two kids, right? Obviously back then, I was afraid of what it meant, but now, imagine it—”

“—Shut your _fucking_ mouth, I mean it!” He screamed, his tear ducts stinging, desperately aching to be uncaged.

“Oh, _Come on_ Jinnie... I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry for what happened between us. The only reason I’ve gone to all this effort is because I realised what a mistake I made, letting you go…”

“If you were sorry, you wouldn’t have done any of it in the first place!”

“I want you to know, that I actually… I came back, six months after I left, and I waited outside your, _our_ door. I wanted so desperately to see you again but, I was scared—”

“ _You_ were scared?!” Hyunjin screamed, shoving the man backwards with both of his palms. “You cheated on me! And you didn’t even have the decency to tell me yourself! I had to find out from your _snake of a sister_! She just _loved_ to rub it in my face how much better you guys were than me, didn’t she? And now you’re just showing up here again, trying to ruin the best thing I’ve ever had!” He felt his eyesight pooling, a blood-red fog starting to mist across his vision in his fury.

“Firstly, my sister’s a fucking idiot, Jin. And secondly, I’ve changed. I mean it. I really have. I loved you back then, I really did.” He took a step closer, and Hyunjin pulled back again, a single tear sliding down his cheek.

“I’m worth more than _your_ fucking kind of _love_ , if that’s what you even want to call it.” Hyunjin whimpered.

“You’re worth more than everything, Jin. Seeing you now… Even just _looking_ at you now, it brings back so many memories. You’re impeccable Jinnie, look at you. You’re so attractive, even more so than I remember, it’s crazy. The blonde hair does you wonders.” He murmured, taking a step nearer at every little smarmy comment, weaving his way back in closer.

He placed both of his hands to the side of Hyunjin’s head, boxing him in with both arms against the car, the smell of a particularly repugnant _zest_ washed over him, citrusy like lemon. The zest only made him tear up more, before he swallowed, summoning the courage to speak again.

“You need to get on a plane, and go back to Europe and never, ever contact me again.”

“Is that so?” He said, his tone shifting to something deeper and much, much darker.

“Y-yes, it is.”

“Well, well… No-can-do, Jinnie. The only way I’m going back to Europe, is if you’re coming with me.”

“Hyunjin!” A tiny voice called out, followed by the slam of a car door and a pattering of tiny footsteps against the concrete.

Running across the parking lot with a smile across his face, was Jeongin, dressed in a white shirt, little navy-blue blazer and matching shorts, and a little, white bowtie around his neck.

Hyunshik pulled back, removing his hands from Hyunjin’s car, squinting at the little boy running their way before Jeongin launched forward and attached himself to Hyunjin’s thigh, wrapping his arms around him.

Minho pressed his key fob, the lights of his greyish-silver, _Hyundai Tucson_ flashing as his car locked a few parking spaces down the lot. Seungmin threw him a little wave and a ‘ _Hi, Mr. Hwang_!’ too, before readying himself in the car mirror, fixing the tilt of his white beret in his reflection.

“Hey Jin, everything alright?” Minho asked, shoving Seungmin’s satchel over his shoulder and pacing towards them.

“Hey, Minho! Everything’s… Everything’s fine, thanks.” He said, looking back to Henry, who’d already pulled back at the sudden interference, creating some space between them, and snaking his hands back into his pockets.

Minho glanced at him, flashing a subtle eyebrow movement; perfectly poised, but knowingly noting Hyunjin’s underlying discomfort.

Minho, unlike Jisung, never gave anything away.

“Why are you still out here in the cold?! It’s the middle of December and the party’s inside!” Minho joked, a sickly-sweet smile across his face.

He shuffled Seungmin out in front of his legs, staring up at Hyunjin with twinkly eyes as if to ask for some attention of his own. Hyunjin passed his hand over Seungmin’s bangs, fixing them a little in the wind, tucking them back under the beret.

Every movement closer to the boys, he felt Henry back off, a little more.

“Uh, yeah. I was just going to go back in, but I—uh, left my key card inside.” Hyunjin said, raising his eyebrows quickly to his right, alerting Minho of the _threat_ in front of him. It was like an unspoken language between them.

“No worries, I have mine, still. Always had one as a back-up just in case, Yeongja insisted.” Minho replied, shooting him a wink. “And who’s this, then?”

“Minho, this is _Hyunshik._ ” Hyunjin said, glaring back at the man.

“Oh, _the_ Hyunshik, huh? You’re the guy that bought Jeongin’s _Millennium Falcon_ toy, right? The guy that Changbin works with?”

Hyunjin’s eyes snapped back to him and he felt the embers of a fire starting to burn within the pit of his stomach.

That _fucker..._

“I— I am, yes.” He responded, putting his hand out for Minho to shake it. He ignored it, bending over to speak to Jeongin instead, who was still wrapped around Hyunjin.

“Jeongin, what do you say to Hyunshik?”

“Thank you, Mr. Hyun…” His voice trailed off, as he buried his head closer into the side of Hyunjin’s thigh, still acutely scared of strangers, and this time, for good reason.

“Good boy, Jeongie. I assume I’ll be seeing you around Changbin’s office, then?” Minho asked.

“Actually, Hyunshik… He left _Seocorp_ , didn’t you, Hyunshik?” Hyunjin said, smiling through gritted teeth. He’d gained a little composure back having Minho with him, something about having the older man there made him feel safe.

“Oh? That’s such a shame, I’m sorry to hear that!” Minho said, dramatically, before suddenly turning back around to look directly at Hyunjin, throwing his hand down on his shoulder. “Well, are you coming in?”

“Yep, let’s go!” Hyunjin replied. He smiled at him, reaching down to lift Jeongin up under his armpits and sit him on his hip on one side, taking Seungmin’s hand in his other.

They started walking towards the entrance, Henry staying firmly where he was, behind them. He wasn’t invited, and he didn’t have a key card, so there was no way he could fumble or manipulate his way in, this time. Hyunjin suddenly felt a little complacent, almost overconfident, until he heard him speak again, his voice laced with venom.

“I guess, I’ll find you, _afterwards_ , Jinnie.” He said firmly, enough to send a shiver from the base of Hyunjin’s neck, all the way down his spine. Imagining Hyunshik turning up at his apartment, which was _technically_ still in his name; made his skin crawl.

His apartment was poison; a toxic bank of memories that he’d wanted to let go of for so long; but no matter how much he tried to make it his own, it never _truly_ belonged to him.

He could redress the old furniture in crushed velvet, and cover the walls in 20th Century art to conceal the cracks beneath them, but they’d always be there, etched into the walls, forever a reminder that Henry would always have something over him.

He turned back, staring at him. His lip was still shaking a little, but he tried to hold it together as not to break down in front of the boys. He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

“Don’t count on finding him after.” Minho suddenly interjected, turning back to Henry too, sharper than ever. “Because if I see you again, you’ll be using that _grotesque_ tweed jacket as a blanket, on the floor of your holding cell.” He grinned, his cheeks crushing against his eyes.

He turned heel to walk back up the front steps and tapped the key card on the post, illuminating three green lights before the door was released. Hyunjin let go of Seungmin’s hand, and carefully placed Jeongin down, both of them running in past him, giggling whilst walking around the revolving barricades.

They pressed up against the window, just like that first time during rehearsals in the High School auditorium, waiting for him on the other side of the glass.

He turned back to look at the man who’d possessed him for so long, one final time, releasing a shaken breath that he’d been holding on to for the past five minutes.

Or, that he’d been holding on to, for six years.

“Don’t come back here again. If you want the apartment, then keep it. There’s nothing left in there for me, anyway.”

He reached into his pockets, pulling out a set of keys and sliding his off of the loop, twisting it around the chain and tossing it at his feet.

“Jinnie, think about this—”

“Goodbye, Henry.”

Minho held the entrance open for him, tapping on the key card from the inside. He ascended up the small flight of stairs, finally traipsing through the door, meeting all three of them on the other side.

◕◕◕

“Now, although this is _my_ night,” Mr. Seo scoffed, chuckling heartily to himself as he looked around, “I feel the need to introduce the man who’s going to _attempt_ to fill my shoes once I’ve retired! I know you all know him, and he’s an endeared member of this team. My son, Changbin.” He announced, starting an obnoxiously loud clap.

The other employees finally livened up, clapping and catcalling for him, and he even heard some little _whoops,_ too. He rose to his feet, pushing his chair backwards with the back of his knees and exhaling. He felt a little nervous, but not because he was about to inherit a company.

There was something else.

He comedically took a swig of his champagne, throwing it backwards, causing everyone in the room to laugh again, just trying to settle the tense atmosphere before he began.

“Thank you, thank you, everyone. I really appreciate you all coming here tonight, for my Dad’s retir—I mean, a ‘ _Celebration of my Dad’s life’s work_ ’.”

The audience laughed, again, whilst his Dad simply furrowed his brow and scanned across the room, clocking the reaction.

“It’s really an honor to be able to stand up here on such a momentous, career-changing night.”

He looked around the vast space, noticing Minho, Jeongin and Seungmin slipping in through the door at the back, Minho shushing them and trying to duck down low, as not to interrupt any of the other guests.

Luckily, the sound of the laughter had created a clever diversion for them, as they slipped into the chairs at one of the tables, Minho fussing their collars and Seungmin slapping his hands away, like he always did. Jeongin waved at him, eager to catch his attention regardless of his important speech, and he waved back, noticing both of their matching white bowties.

“I’ve worked for this company for a really long time, since I was a teenager, actually, and although lighting engineering wasn’t _particularly_ the occupation I’d set out for, I’ve enjoyed the life lessons that I’ve learnt here. This place really allowed me to find my feet, and I’ve had many great opportunities here, too many to count… Everyone’s worked so hard here, and I’m—"

The door opened again, just cracking slightly.

He watched as Hyunjin appeared behind it, firstly just peeking in, and then gracefully slipping in through the door entirely, a couple of the audience looking towards him, but mostly still focused on Changbin’s speech. He smiled at him, bowing a little as an apology for the interruption and standing off at the side of the table next to the others.

Changbin faltered, totally forgetting what he was saying in the first place. He was illuminated by the lights, his blonde hair shining pink, like the first time they met.

He was beautiful.

Too beautiful.

He felt the smoke again, and it wasn’t from the fog machines, this time.

It was airy, and light, and it felt like suddenly they were the only two people in the room, encircled by lavender and surrounded by an overwhelming lilac breeze that enveloped him, making him totally forget where he was for a moment.

He stuttered, swallowing some air back down his windpipe, before attempting to continue his planned speech, but the words just weren’t coming out. It was like everything in his brain was just consumed by the purple fog.

Something in Changbin’s heart twisted.

“I-I was told by a great woman… That we all know what’s best for us, and some of the best things that’ve happened to me, happened because of this company. However… I’ve had some of my very _worst_ moments here, too...”

Suddenly, the audience perked up again, heads bobbing up out over the tables. He heard the murmurs starting again, and a couple of people’s mouths dropped open at the revelation.

“And I… I know this will come as a shock to a lot of you, but I’ve been thinking about it, and I’ve… I’ve decided to step down, from _SeoCorp_.”

The room erupted in confused babbles, suddenly drowning everything else out. It was deafening; half of them amazed at Changbin’s fearless announcement, and half of them terrified of what it would mean, or who else would be in charge after he left.

He clocked eyes with Hyunjin, across the room, who nodded at him in affirmation, a silent message of support. He knew he was doing the right thing, there was nothing left for him here, now.

He looked back to his Dad for a fleeting moment, his face contorted in horror.

“Changbin, are you feeling well!?” His Dad boomed from his space at the table, rising to his feet and slamming his glass down on the table.

“Actually, I’m not really feeling too well. I think the only way to feel well again, is to leave this place. For good, Dad.” Changbin replied.

“Yeongja, will you please speak to your son! He’s not in sound mind!” Mr. Seo called out over the roar of the audience, throwing body back in his chair and his hands up above him.

“ _No_ , Seunghun, how about for once, _you_ speak to your son?” She replied, cocking an eyebrow, before taking another sip of her pink champagne, just hovering her lips over the top of the glass.

“Everyone, I’m sorry to have to leave you all at a time like this, but sometimes we just need to focus on what’s important.” Changbin continued, looking across to Jeongin and Seungmin, then back to Hyunjin, who was softly smiling at him from the door. “And I know what’s important, now.”

“Oh, for goodness sake! _That one_ , again?!” His Dad roared, pointing directly at Hyunjin from across the room, who’d started wandering down the edge to come and meet him. “Changbin you have utterly lost your mind!”

“Did you know? About Hyunshik? Did you know that he was Hyunjin’s ex boyfriend?” Changbin asked, remaining calm.

“He was what?! No—Of course not!” The man spluttered, in total amazement, “Look, Changbin, you’re my only son! I know it took me a long time to accept it, and I know you may think that I’m old-fashioned, and it’s taken me a long time to accept your _preferences_ , but I just wanted you to find someone you could be proud of being with. I had no idea of this man’s affiliation with him! Your associa—”

“—My _boyfriend_ , Dad.” Changbin interrupted, “Hyunjin, is my boyfriend. And you hired someone who’d hurt him.”

“I had no idea, Changbin! Hyunshik came with lots of credible references and seemed extremely legitimate! I was simply excited at the prospect of finding you someone worthwhile! I don’t think I should be penalised for wanting the best suiters for you, especially at a time like this!”

“I am worthwhile.” Hyunjin intercepted, having made his way down the side of the room, and meeting them at the centre aisle, “I’m sorry that you only see the worth in someone if they come from money. I feel sorry for you, I really do.”

Hyunjin slipped his arm around Changbin’s, pulling him tightly against his side. He watched as his Dad looked him up and down, a soured expression across his face.

“Sorry for me? Look at yourself, you’re a grown man dressed like a clown, teaching some sissy subject, at some terrible school! Changbin please, think about your options here!”

“Hyunshik, was never an option Dad. He played you like a fool, all of us. I’m in love with Hyunjin, and I’ve made my choice.”

His Dad was totally stunned, and so was Changbin. He couldn’t believe he’d even had the courage to think of doing what he’d just done, but here he was, with no other plan, no back-up, just him and Hyunjin, facing it, together.

“Let’s go, Hyunjin. Maybe we’ll catch a bite to eat with the boys?”

“Sounds great. But if you don’t mind, I’ll just be a minute, okay? I’ll meet you outside?” Hyunjin said, pressing a kiss to the older man’s cheek.

Changbin cocked an eyebrow at the wicked look across Hyunjin’s face as he stared his Father in the eye. Whatever he was going to say, it couldn’t be any worse than their first interaction at the museum, so obliged, squeezing Hyunjin’s hand, before slipping out of the conversation.

He headed across to find Minho and the boys, both of them running up to meet him in excitement.

*:･ﾟ✧

“What now, then? Huh?” Mr. Seo scoffed, slouching down back in to his chair. “You got what you wanted, but I guess you haven’t told him that you meandered money from me, taking that chequ—

“I returned the cheque, to your Wife, Mr. Seo. She was quite concerned that you’d been spending money so recklessly in your _old age_. It’s lucky you retired; you’re not in the right headspace to run a company.” Hyunjin replied, perfectly composed.

“How dare you—!"

“I forgot to mention, Sir. How _did_ you know, that I’d always wanted to go to Nepal?” Hyunjin asked, glancing down at the man across the table, cocking an eyebrow.

“I’m sorry?”

“You said, with the money you gave me, I could _'go on my dream vacation to Nepal'_. That’s oddly specific…?”

“I- I think I remember, something about it—" He stumbled, his eyes flittering around the room. 

“—Well, the only person that would have known about it was Hen—Hyunshik. He was, the only person who knew how badly I wanted to go there...”

"Well, that’s certainly a strange coincidence. But I don’t know what you’re insinuating!" He suddenly shouted, slamming his palms down on the table defensively.

“What I’m _insinuating_ , Mr. Seo. Is that you sought out my ex-boyfriend on purpose, just to keep me away from Changbin. And when your little scheme didn’t succeed, because Changbin found that photo of us, you tried to bribe me with 60 million won, so that I’d stay away from him, so he didn’t ever find out the truth.”

His brows furrowed, and Hyunjin noticed him visibly gulping. He was on the ropes. If he thought _Minho_ was combative, Hyunjin was like a cage-fighter, and he just knocked Changbin's Dad, clean out.

“I beg your pardon?!” He choked out, looking across to his Wife across the table, who simply rolled her eyes and continued casually sipping on her pink, cherry champagne.

“I don’t want your pardons, or your apologies, Mr. Seo. All I want to tell you, is that I’m in love with your son, and no matter what you do, or say to me, we're going to be together.’

“You disrespectful little shi—”

‘—And oh, before I go, just so you know... You have two, yes _two_ , amazingly talented, wonderful grandkids, and they deserve a hell of a lot better than you. And don’t even get me started on that wonderful Wife of yours, either.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phewwwwwwwwwwwwww sorry this prob has loads of typos because it's 5k sjdfhslkdjfhsdjkfh ehehhe  
> i'm literally losing my mind it's like 1:15am and i only just finished and i'm getting emosh about this ending soon ahah
> 
> also big thanks for 500 kudos!!! 😭
> 
> cry with me <3  
> twitter.com/YfwbbS


	20. Now, Fair Hippolyta, Our Nuptial Hour

*:◕ﾟ･ﾟ✧◕

Changbin made his way back across to Seungmin and Jeongin, who looked moderately confused and profoundly confused, respectively, at what the hell had even just happened. Changbin felt it too, but he felt such a sense of relief, that worrying about what was to come was at the back of his mind.

Minho and the boys had been there barely ten minutes before Changbin was practically showing them out. He considered that having the boys in such a volatile environment wasn’t healthy, and he honestly just wanted to see the back of this place, for good.

“So… I guess I left off work early for nothing, huh?” Minho asked, his chin resting on his hand, propped up by his elbow at the table. “I didn’t even get to try the shrimp…”

Changbin scoffed, slumping himself down on to a chair next to Jeongin, holding his hands out expectantly. Jeongin got out of his chair, tottering across to sit on Changbin’s lap, still a little puzzled, but happy to be in his Dad’s arms.

“Sorry for cutting the night short, I just felt like—”

“—I’m glad, Changbin.” Minho replied across the table, “I really am. Your Dad’s been hard work since the dinosaurs roamed. It was about time.”

“Understatement.”

Minho lifted himself up, pushing his chair out from under him and yanking his tie down, loosening it from his neck. “Well, if that’s a wrap, I can get home and stop Felix from burning the house down.” He walked around, grabbing Seungmin’s bag and his coat off of the back of one of the chairs. “Saves me re-adjusting the boys bowties every two minutes whilst your Dad actively ignores my existence, too.”

Changbin turned back to watch Hyunjin striding over, the entire room was eyeballing him, surrounding him with little patters of voices, and a lot of raised eyebrows. As soon as he saw Changbin, he let go of a rather large breath, before throwing his hands up defensively.

“Well… I’m not going to be invited to any _family gatherings_ any time soon, but I think I’ve said what needs to be said… Ready to go?” He looked towards Seungmin, who nodded, standing up and patting himself down before checking his beret placement, once again. Hyunjin tweaked it for him slightly, before giving him a little thumbs up.

“Yeah, I’m _more_ than ready to go.” Changbin responded, lifting Jeongin up to hook his arms around his neck so that he could carry him out.

Changbin gave his Mom a quick wave goodbye from across the room, as they finally they made their way out, weaving through the tables of guests, Jeongin around his waist, and Seungmin independently walking behind them, with his hands in his pockets casually, like the little wannabe college student he was.

Some of the employees all stood up to bow to him, or gave him a handshake on the way out, wishing him the best, and he said a few words of encouragement to some of them, but he was sure he’d see them around, anyway. Most of his colleagues were close friends, by this point. He’d always treated them with respect, and he felt reassured that he’d been accepted as a person there, rather than _Mr. Seo’s son_.

They made their way back through the building, wandering through the expanse surface area of the cold marbled floors. When they finally came to the back entrance, Changbin tapped his key card against the scanner, illuminating three red lights as they all made their way out through the revolving door again.

Hyunjin gazed across the quiet parking lot, looking around, and nervously holding his breath. His face looked clammy and pale as he scanned the entire lot, he couldn’t see any sign of Henry, so far, and he knew he wasn’t going back home, tonight. 

He really was, gone. 

Changbin waved his hand in front of him to catch his eye, other arm firmly wrapped around Jeongin, who was starting to doze off over his shoulder.

“Something wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or somethin—”

“—No, I’m just… _Relieved,_ I guess.” Hyunjin said, exhaling deeply into the winter breeze, releasing the tension from his shoulder. “I thought… Well, never mind. It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Well, this was eventful and totally not a waste of gas...” Minho piped up, attempting to ease the awkwardness in the air as he fiddled around with his keys in his back pocket.

“I mean, we’re all here, we could get dinner then head home? It’d be nice to spend dinner with the boys.” Changbin said, looking to Hyunjin and then back to Jeongin, who’d suddenly perked up at the mention of food, nodding frantically at him, bobbing up and down in his arms before whispering ‘ _kimchi-fried rice’_ in to his ear.

“Jisung and Felix are at home now, one second, I’ll just give them a call. I’m sure they can pull away from whatever mess they’re making to come with us to get some food…” He pulled his phone out, before looking back across to Hyunjin, who was staring off blankly into space.

They hadn’t touched on what had happened between them with Minho or Jisung; everything had happened so fast. Hyunjin had no idea what Minho could even possibly think about all of this, but he could clearly tell that there were some unspoken apprehensions in the air.

“Come on boys, let’s get in the car and let the grownups talk.” Minho said, nodding at Hyunjin, who gave him the slightest relieved smile, that seemed to be an unspoken kind of thank you.

A _thank you for not asking questions_.

A _thank you for being there, earlier_.

A _thank you for being a good friend._

Changbin placed Jeongin down, who ran immediately off to the car, tugging at the back-passenger door, pulling it open. Seungmin followed, and Minho gave Changbin a reassuring pat on the shoulder, squeezing a little before following the boys to the lot.

There was still the hum of voices in the air, and a few people around the corner smoking, as well as the sounds of the traffic passing across the front entrance of the building. For some reason, it almost felt tranquil compared to the drama and murmurs of voices from being inside.

“About going home after…” Hyunjin said, awkwardly, rubbing the back of his nape. “I may have left my apartment, for good… As in, I kind of, don’t live there anymore...”

“What? Why?” Changbin asked, turning back to face him.

“Well, I put the stuff that matters into storage before I came here… Not that there was a lot to hold on to but… I Just—I just thought that, if you really were _done_ with me, that I didn’t really see a reason to stay here anymore. I’ve been thinking about it and what I want and… I— I kind of packed my stuff, and wrote a notice from work and—”

Changbin silenced him by grasping his face suddenly.

“Hey, you’re unreal, you know that?” He said, shaking his head, chuckling softly under his breath.

He pressed a delicate kiss to Hyunjin’s forehead, the older man lowering his head to accept it, blinking back anxious tears. He was so overwhelmed with the entire night, that his body felt weak.

“You can just stay with me until we work something out.” He slid his hands downwards, around the smooth line of Hyunjin’s jaw, cupping his cheeks in his hands firmly to drag the taller man’s gaze back down to him. “Don’t leave your job, you’re amazing at it, I promise.”

“Well, you were amazing at yours too, but here we are...”

“I’ll be fine. I have tons of savings and I have connections in this industry. I’m not worried.” 

“Sheesh, I wish I could be as calm and collected as you are…” Hyunjin replied, his head dropping back down as he rubbed his wrist across his nose. “It’s just… What if—"

“—No _what ifs_. Whatever happens, we’re going to face it together, alright? Hey, look at me.” He pulled him back up again, Hyunjin swallowing down a shallow breath. “I mean it this time. Jobs come and go, people come and go, but none of it matters now, okay? All that matters is I love you, and I’m not going to lose you again for anything.”

He ran the back of his finger against the soft skin of Hyunjin’s cheek, and the taller man softly closed his eyes as he angled himself against it, feeling the warmth of his pulse. He inhaled, absorbing the smell into his memory. His wrist smelt perfectly like sandalwood and peaches with just a hint of elderflower.

He took his hand in to his own, letting them fall loosely in front of each other, and stared at him for a moment, taking the time to admire how the gentle lighting from the combination of the moon and the front entrance had casted a shadow across the cute, mysterious chin scar.

“Y-You’re… You’re not gonna try and… Give me your number, are you?” He joked, wearily, both of them drooping in to stifled laughs against each other’s foreheads, breathless and totally exhausted from the dramatics of the night. Hyunjin peered back up to him, his eyes gleaming from the residual tears gathering across his waterline.

“I love you, too. I mean it, Changbin. What you did, in there, for me… Against your own family…” He choked up, swallowing harshly. “I didn’t mean to cause all of this, I feel like—”

“Stop it, this would have happened with or without you, eventually. It just so happens I got the best result I could have dreamed of.”

Hyunjin threw his arms around the shorter man’s shoulders, gripping on to him for dear life, letting his tears cascade down his shirt as they held each other.

“I’m going to be with you, no matter what, okay?” Changbin mumbled into his arm.

“B-be my boyfriend, then. Officially.” Hyunjin said, stuttering the words out awkwardly like they’d never left his mouth before.

Changbin lifted his head out of the space between his neck and shoulder, a smile across his face that was half smug, and half endeared, and one hundred percent charming.

“You’re ready now, then, huh? To make us official?” He laughed, his eyes sparkling at the suggestion.

“Yeah, I’m definitely ready.”

*:◕ﾟ･ﾟ✧◕

**Epilogue – 8 Months Later**

“I cannot find my slides anywhere! I’ve searched and I’ve searched and they’re just not—” He trailed off, throwing shoes out of the cloakroom, scattering penny-loafers, dress shoes and ankle boots about the hallway.

“Are you sure you haven’t packed them, already?” Changbin called out from the master bedroom, adjacent.

“Of course I’m sure!” He said, rising up off of his knees, nearly stumbling forward as he did in a blind panic. He slid his way through the marbled hall, dipping his head in through the kitchen to check the pile of shoes beside the back door, and finally ran back through swinging his head in through the bedroom.

His face was glowing and flushed, whilst his hair was tied back off of his forehead, creating some kind of little ponytail that was sticking up everywhere.

“I’m losing my mind and you’re just lying there?!” Hyunjin bellowed, running back in, and pulling the mirrored closet open again, frantically searching through the bottom of it for his lost footwear.

“Well, I was ready ages ago… Can’t you just pack another pair…? You have like five different pairs…”

“Out of the question! These ones are _Valentino Garavani_!” He replied, throwing his head back around to look at him in exasperation.

“They’re not even yours…” Changbin laughed, nonchalantly flicking through the notifications on his phone as he lay there, forwarding most of them on without even reading them.

Most of them were from work. He’d re-hired his Dad’s old assistant to come and work for him, now that he was handling his Mom’s accounts as well as being in the process of starting up his own sound engineering business. She handled things well in his absence, and she didn’t have to worry about wandering eyes with Changbin…

“They’re not mine?! Come on, they don’t even fit you?!” Hyunjin scoffed.

“Ey, watch it.” Changbin warned, his eyebrow cocking over the top of his phone, a smirk appearing at the corner of his lips.

“You’re being literally _no help_ whatsoever!” Hyunjin whined, moving across to the bed, where Changbin was laying, fully clothed on his back, even his hoodie zipped up to the top and _Prada_ cap firmly on top of his head.

All of Changbin’s suitcases were already neatly stacked up in the hallway; he’d finished hours ago and was just watching Hyunjin tear his place apart like a raucous whirlwind of matted blonde hair.

He was feeling obnoxious, and decided to grab a hold of one of Changbin’s shins, shoving it to the side, yanking his leg off of the bed in a whiny act of defiance… It was immature, he knew, but he couldn’t help himself.

“What’s _not_ _helpful_ , is you not even being _dressed_ , let alone packed…” Changbin scoffed, shooting him a glaring look, and shimmying back up the bed where he was previously settled, making a mess of the fluffy, grey blankets below.

Changbin was right, Hyunjin was still in the white t-shirt and green tartan-patterned pyjama pants that he’d slept in the night before, and they had to leave in less than two hours. He was definitely behind schedule, and definitely not because he’d spent last night getting drunk with Jisung and Chan at karaoke, that’s for sure…

His mouth fell wide open at the sudden accusatory tone Changbin was using.

“What is this? Shout at Hyunjin for simply _existing_ , day?!” He sighed, throwing himself down on the bottom of the bed dramatically.

“I’m not shouting. Everything just sounds loud when you’re hungover on a school night, Mr. Hwang.” Changbin teased, jolting him with his foot.

“I’m not hungover!”

“You’re not fooling anyone, Hyunjin...”

Hyunjin looked back to him, taking in the _sheer audacity_ of the man in front of him.

He suddenly launched himself up towards the top of the bed, hooking his leg over top of the blasé older man and sitting on top of his thighs. He quickly peeled the phone he was _so focused on_ out of his hands, dumping it down near their feet.

“Hey? I was writing an email—”

“Well, now you’re not… Now, you’re apologising to your boyfriend.” He grumbled, looking across to the side and crossing his arms firmly over his chest in a huff, trying to seem self-assured.

“Don’t start what you can’t finish, Hwang...” Changbin teased, blowing cold air underneath his chin, causing the younger man to sit back and flap his hands out in front of him in abhorrence. “ _Oh no_ … My boyfriend has me pinned down against the bed, whatever shall I do…?”

“You are so full of it…” Hyunjin replied, blushing slightly, shaking his head from side to side.

He realised he actually hadn’t thought this through, what _was_ the angle here? And what exactly was he expecting…?

“Perhaps.” Changbin murmured, softly wrapping his hands around his forearms to bring him in closer towards his chest, until Hyunjin was tugged down on top of him, perched up by his hands at either side of the older man’s head.

Changbin pressed a feather-light kiss to the expanse of skin across Hyunjin’s collarbone, exposed by how loosely his shirt was fitting across his shoulders.

The younger man pressed his tongue across the inside of his cheek, trying to hold back a scoff.

“Wow, you’re honestly going to complain that I’m running behind schedule and then try it on with—”

“ _Try_ implies there’s doubt I’ll succeed…” Changbin murmured into the dip of his shoulder, his voice low and gravelly, in a way that always made Hyunjin feel dizzy.

“Y-you’re already dressed.” Hyunjin said, with a shiver.

Changbin wrapped his own legs around the back of Hyunjin’s, and without an inch of remorse; _launched_ him down to the side of the bed, flipping them over and settling down to straddle his thighs in return, encasing him with his legs.

He tossed his cap aside, somewhere in the direction of the closet, and crossed his arms across him, to peel his hoodie off of over the top of his head in one go, not even bothering to unzip it…

“Dressed? No I’m not?” He said innocently, shrugging.

He had a plain black t-shirt underneath, the sleeves just short and tapered enough to show off the lines of his more-than-impressive biceps… They were Hyunjin’s weakness, and he knew it.

He dived back down, re-attaching his mouth to the inside of Hyunjin’s neck, placing messy kisses in a trail ending at the hollow behind his ear. Hyunjin could hear his stagnant breaths echoing through him.

“We have to see… In l-like… There’s _two_ … Hours.” Hyunjin babbled, his words juddering along with Changbin’s movements down his neck.

“Mmm-hmm… Plenty of time…” He slipped his hand under Hyunjin’s shirt, ghosting his fingers along his hipbones and Hyunjin, annoyingly, felt a soft moan escape his lips, that he was holding back in fear of Changbin thinking that he was going to win this little game he was playing.

“You’re so _beautiful_ , Hyunjin.” He whispered into the skin along his chest.

And there they were, the magic words. The ones that sent Hyunjin into a writhing state of euphoria...

“So beautiful, and all _mine.._.” He mouthed, smugly, before looking back up to glance at Hyunjin, only slightly wrecked below him. _Just enough,_ Changbin thought.

He gazed down for a moment, in awe of the pretty painting laid out in front of him, lips kissed pink and eyes fluttering shut. He reached his hands out, feeling Hyunjin’s’ wind their way around his own, each finger weaving tightly around the other man’s until they were locked together.

“You’re right. Better get going.” He said, suddenly releasing their fingers and slapping his hands down loudly on Hyunjin’s thighs before hoisting himself up. “You have to get yourself packed... _Vegas_ isn’t gonna wait for you.” He slipped off of the bed, reaching for his hoodie and pulling it back over his head.

“You did not just do that.” Hyunjin said, launching himself up with enough vigour he could’ve given himself whiplash. “You did _not_ just do that.”

*:◕ﾟ･ﾟ✧◕

“Morning, darlings!” Mrs. Seo said, unlocking the clasp of the store's front door for them both. Changbin and slipped through the entrance, Hyunjin following after him, the bell at the top cheerily singing out as they entered. The store didn’t open until nine, and it was only 8:00am.

“Good morning, Yeongja. Did you sleep well?” Hyunjin asked, ducking his way through the door, to bow to her, carrying a box out in front of with both arms outstretched. 

“I mean, Seunghun has been snoring awfully at the moment. Whenever it gets hotter he’s like a blabbering whale. It’s okay though, I just hold his nose.” She said, throwing him a wink, before extending her arms out to summon him into a hug.

Hyunjin laughed, clicking the latch of the door behind him with his elbow before wandering across to place the box out on one of the tables near the entrance, before wrapping his arms around her.

“How’s he been?” Changbin asked, wandering around the baby pink foyer.

“Well, his blood pressure is up to 140/90 again, so he’s resting…” She sighed, rolling her eyes. “I guess that’s what happens when you have no one to manage your day or organising your finances, hey?” She whimsied, giving Changbin a _knowing_ grin, who laughed throatily as he wandered around the empty space of the foyer with his hands in his pockets.

“What are you working on today, Mom?” Changbin asked, prodding at the white mannequins sporting ostrich feather fascinators and emerald green, bedazzled bows.

“It’s the same maid-of-honor gown for a close family friend, but I have more customisations to make. I’m working on braid trim; do you want to see it, Hyunjin?”

“Totally.” Hyunjin interjected, and Changbin just nodded in confusion feigning that he had any idea what they were talking about, as the younger man scooted past him at the speed of light, past the sea of modern renaissance-styled, clientele portraits lining the pink walls.

She pulled out a delicate purple dress made of silk, the lower portion made from hand-sew, voluminous open-weave Tulle.

Hyunjin had a certain affirmation for high fashion and customisations. He’d considered going back to take a course in it eventually, but that could be put on the back burner for the moment. In the mean time, he helped Yeongja out whenever he could at her _Haute Couture_ shop, although her skills far surpassed his own.

“It looks incredible, Yeongja. You’re, really amazing at this, huh?”

“Thank you, sweetheart. Isn’t it a beautiful color? I’ve always had an affinity for purple.”

“I thought I’d just stop by to drop this off before we go. The video footage from the performance of Seungmin as _Peasebottom_. We finally heard back from the unions committee about a full recording but, as I thought, they disallowed it…” He pulled a silver USB stick out of his pocket, handing it across to her. “So, instead, here’s some footage I took from the dress rehearsal that they’ve okayed under intellectual property protection guidelines… I’m sorry I couldn’t get the full thing.” Hyunjin apologised.

“Oh darling. You didn’t have to go through all that!” She shouted, holding her hand to her chest.

“Well, I kind of wanted to get it developed myself anyway. I kind of missed it. I hope we can do one again, soon, when we’re back anyway.”

Hyunjin had decided to keep his job at the high school as Head of the Arts Department. However, he’d recently been working only four days out of five days physically in the classroom. The other day he’d spend taking drama workshops at the elementary school, as the parents were so impressed with his stint, that he’d been encouraged by the Principal to make it a permanent feature.

He also made sure that on the days he was teaching the younger kids, he wore as many brightly colored turtlenecks as he could. 

“Well, we should get going, Mom.” Changbin said, glancing down at his watch. “Minho and the boys are waiting to see us off.”

“Oh course, darling. Do you have sunscreen?” She said, rushing around behind the curtain.

“Mom, of course we have sunscreen. Hyunjin’s dedicated an entire suitcase to just that…” Changbin groaned, before walking towards his Mom, who held her arms out wide to invite him in.

“Hey, I don’t want wrinkles…” Hyunjin groaned, before joining in on the embrace, wrapping his arms around them both.

*:◕ﾟ･ﾟ✧◕

“I’m going to miss you Jinnie!” Jisung exclaimed, dramatically throwing his hands around the taller man’s middle. “We’ve not been apart since college!”

“It’s a two-month sabbatical, Jisung. I’m not leaving forever…” Hyunjin scoffed, feeling the air being pushed out of his lungs as the tiny man squeezed the lifeforce out of him.

“I mean, who’s going to make fun of my lunchbox notes for the next few months!?” Jisung said, pouting his lip out. He placed his palms flat on Hyunjin’s shoulders and rattled him from side-to-side.

“Are you sure you don’t need a plus one?” Minho asked. “I can fit in a suitcase... I’ll just be drinking the cheap champagne and gambling whilst Jisung looks after the kids and the feline horde… I’ll stay out of sight…” He laughed, before Hyunjin giggled and pulled him in to the hug too, with some resistance, but ultimately, he allowed it.

“You two be good, for Dad, okay?” Changbin said, encasing both of the boys in his arms and he knelt down in front of them.

“I’ll miss you, Dad!” Jeongin said, his lip curling under as tears started filling his eyes.

“Jeongin…” Seungmin groaned, rolling his eyes.

“Don’t cry Jeongie, it’s not for long. I’ll message every day and we’ll videocall, alright?” Changbin responded, wiping the tears away with his sleeve. “And when me and Hyunjin are back, Dad said you can stay at ours for a whole week straight, sound good?”

“But Felix will get lonely! Can Felix come, too?!” Seungmin asked, pulling back from the hug, fanning his hand out to the small, blonde, freckled boy who was standing timidly just beside Minho's leg, holding his hand.

Changbin looked at him, smiling, then back across to Jisung, once his rival, now his _friend._

He internally laughed at how _absurd_ it all seemed now, how they’d sparred before. Everything had changed when he met Hyunjin, all of it for the better. 

“Of course, if Felix wants to come, he can come.”

"Well, we better get a move on, I have mojito's waiting!" Hyunjin announced, almost launching their suitcases in to the back of his new car.

Changbin and Hyunjin had discussed going on a vacation in depth. Hyunjin’s desire to visit _Nepal_ eventually subsided, and his desire to ever visit _England_ again was _definitely_ obliterated, along with the other parts of Europe he and Henry had visited.

He concluded it was best to part with those memories now and start some new ones of their own. _Nepal_ would be too cold for him anyway, Hyunjin thought.

 _Las Vegas, Nevada_ , was where they eventually settled on, along with some other westerly states if they could manage it. Hyunjin had been to America before and lived there for a while as a child, and he had one Aunt out there, who he’d reached out to, after being fairly closed off from his family for so long. His _Mom_ was even going to come out to see them there, to meet Changbin, too... He hadn’t seen her since he was with Henry, seven years ago...

So, that’s what they did. Spending two months together, away from the hustle and bustle of Changbin’s new business, or the busy classroom filled with stroppy teenagers who didn't know the difference between a mattress and a matinée.

They were booked into a Presidential Suite, watching the sunset from the bed; the lights from the window casting rainbow-patterned reflections throughout the room, scattering colored flecks across the wall like fairy lights.

The days they’d spend exploring the _Natural History Museum_ or surveying little, quaint cafés, and bespoke clothing boutiques that Hyunjin insisted on visiting. Changbin followed along, pretending to have a single clue about what was going on, nodding along whenever Hyunjin got excited about some obscure garment that he _‘had to show Yeongja!'_

Sometimes they’d opt to stay out of the direct sun, just cooped up together in their room, eating expensive sous vide duck, lying on top of the blankets whilst Hyunjin tried to translate whatever awful American sitcom was on the hotel TV. They’d call Jeongin and Seungmin and the two little ones would tell them what they’d done at school that day and what Minho would cook for them. Jeongin would play them some piano, and Seungmin would brag to Hyunjin about which monologue he was working on memorising next.

The nights they’d spend getting tipsy and eating exotic foods they weren’t used to, or enjoying the scenery in a very extraordinary top floor, cascading pool that overlooked the lights. They'd stay wrapped in each others arms out on the balcony, taking in the expanse of the city, lit up at night, a muted lavender haze encompassing them. It was a pretty spectacular view.

They’d visit the casinos, and go _‘out, out’_ like they used to, the only difference being that Hyunjin didn’t have to impress anyone anymore, or act like he was someone he wasn’t. The only person that mattered was right in front of him, watching him at any given moment like he was some luxury, expensive piece of artwork, framed in front of his eyes. They'd dance together, and sing out-of-tune at terrible karaoke bars that Changbin refused _point blank_ to be a part of originally; but he could be persuaded easily after a few shots and some teasing from Hyunjin. 

What they _hadn’t_ planned to do, was have one-too-many mojitos in an 80’s-themed go-go bar, and get married on a whim, but it was definitely one of their better ideas. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, and that's a wrap!
> 
> sorry that this chapter is so over-indulgent, domestic and soppy, i just really felt like i wanted a good send off!
> 
> thank you all so much for getting through all of this! i know at the start i said it would a SIDE STORY, and that it would be be shorter than N16, but here we are, months later, surpassing the length of the original story. 😅 i don't know, i was only really expecting this to be a few chapters. i guess i just get too attached to characters skldjfhsdkjfh
> 
> i'm super appreciative of all the love this has received and everyone who's interacted on twitter and on here, it's really inspiring for me and it makes me grossly happy to wake up to people screaming at me, lmao. the people who've commented about references from previous chapters and picked out previous lines and stuff, and who like to analyse everything; you are all extra incredible. 
> 
> this will be the last of the N16/FOA AU series, so thank you for anyone who's read this, and special thanks to anyone who read their way through both fics and left comments! <3
> 
> please look forward to my next fic, which is in the works. it will be a minsung/chanlix combo fic! TBA <3
> 
> find me on twitter if you want updates or just like to listen to a woman scream about 8 kpop boys  
> https://twitter.com/YfwbbS <3


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